So tonight is opening night of my show. We have not run it yet. We do not have lights because the dimmer rack is broken (basically the thing that the lights plug into and that would control the switches. If it worked.) We lost a girl to appendicitis. Three days ago. Which means we restaged.....YESTERDAY.

But I am not worried. I know what I am doing. I know what is supposed to happen, so if someone else messes up then hopefully I can help out. But this is the most unprepared I have EVER felt going into a show. The funny thing is that all through high school I was prepared more, but always felt nervous to the point of nausea. Now, even though this could be a complete disaster, I feel pretty calm. I'm waiting for the panic to set in, but at this point it's go big or go home.

It's funny to think how much your mind can affect you - and how far I've come in the last few years. It's a good little send off.

But in other news, this has been a stressful week and I worked a package of Dark Chocolate M&Ms into my meal plan today. I need a treat.