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Post Binge Regret Blog


Sunday, March 08, 2009

I need to write down how I'm feeling right now, because whenever I overeat I always tell myself to remember how I'm feeling the next time this type of situation arises -- and yet I seem to magically forget when the crucial moment comes. So maybe actually writing it down will help.

Today was my sister's birthday and I had a lot of cake. I want to be able to have just one piece, enjoy it, and move on with my life. But so far I've never been successful at this. I licked every single bowl and jar clean while we were making it, had one and a half slices at dinner, and then proceeded to compulsively pick at it while I was putting away. I knew I'd be having cake so I tried to eat on the lighter side during the day (still eating every few hours, but eating less) to compensate. I just don't think I'm one of those people who can do that. My body gets so hungry during the day and it's not like it knows I'm banking my calories for that night. It doesn't care. It wants energy pronto, or it feels crappy. And then goes nuts when it seems something like cake.

I think it's important to budget your calories so you don't go over and gain weight. But I don't seem to be able to do this. Which means either I go over, or I can never have special occasions that happen at night. And you know what? Life has special occasions. I need to be able to make them work.

This week has been terrible though, even without special occasions. My mom made brownies twice in four days, and I ate about half the pan of both. She also bought some pound cake, which I ate half of in one day, and I don't even like pound cake that much! What is wrong with me?

I don't want to gain weight back. If anything I'd like to become more fit, tone up, and maybe knock some more fat off. I know this rationally, but this doesn't seem to stop me from sabotaging myself.

I know I can't give up sweets completely, like some people advise if you want to get rid of the cravings. It simply doesn't work for me, and I go nuts when I finally have some sweets in front of me. So I need to figure out something else that works for me.

Hopefully this blog will help. I can look back at it and remember: Don't give in!! It's almost more satisfying to know you have willpower!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
BIGGIRL2082010 3/9/2009 6:33AM

    First, pat yourself on the back. Why? Because, even as you indulged, you WERE aware of what you were doing. You cleaned out the pots and pans - but you *always* do that. You nibbled as you put away the cake - that's probably a normal thing, too.

And seriously, it WAS cake. Birthday cake at that. There were all the emotional and social-eating triggers to foil your plans to "be good".

Where you succeeded most was the fact that you only one and a half slices! AND you'd already been budgeting your calories for the day.

So, pat yourself on the back for staying as much in control as you could. Plan some pattern interrupts for yourself for the next time you get such a temptation. You know life keeps happening. All you can do is be prepared for it.

You say you can't just give up sweets. Okay, fair enough. Maybe you can do something almost as good. Right now, and probably all your life, you've been telling yourself how GREAT a dessert tastes. Try something slightly different.

The next time you eat something yummy, enjoy *every* bite. Seriously. Look at the presentation first - isn't it gorgeous? Take your time, really savour the treat that is *almost* in your mouth! Now, bring a spoonful up to your mouth. Inhale. Can you smell it? Take your time.

Now eat that first bite. REALLY focus on the flavour. Hold it in your mouth for a few seconds before you begin to chew. Let the flavours really permeate your taste buds. Chew - but slowly, like you're eating something rare and precious. Chew until it's really mush before you swallow.

Okay, that was a fabulous bite. Now do ALL of that again - admire it on the plate, inhale the aroma, really savour the bite.

And again. And again. And again. :)

Yep. If you take it slow and don't just wolf it down, I am pretty sure you'll find that you are completely satisfied after only a few bites. And since you didn't allow guilt to flavour the treat, you're not going to beat yourself up about it - the treat IS a part of life, not something forbidden.

Try it. It will work if you truly decide that a treat IS part of your life. You've made the choices to be healthy, you've lost the weight, and the occasional treat definitely is NOT going to totally undo all that effort!

You are all right, and you WILL be all right!

Congratulations on a job very well done!

Keep up the good work!

Cheers,
Maya


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VANESSAANN83 3/9/2009 6:16AM

    Life does indeed have special occasions, but they don't have to revolve around food. I either have to say no to all of it, or I can't stop eating. It's all or nothing...so usually I go for nothing. I don't calorie count on Thanksgiving or Christmas though (or my bday), so I DO have my own special occasions.

I'd do like the others and advise you to just say no. Bring your own sweet treats, like sf pudding, or some low cal ice cream. Just a suggestion :) Good luck!

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CHRISTFIEND 3/8/2009 11:44PM

    Journaling about your feelings is a great way to stay in check with what triggers the over eating!! Good Luck!!

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GRAMMYSKIDS58 3/8/2009 9:54PM

    Writing how you are feeling is a great idea. Sometime finding the right combination is the hardest part of loosing weight. You CAN do this... you just have to keep trying and find what works for you. Good luck!
Kathy

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