Monday, February 02, 2009
Okay, so I don't know where to put this so I'm blogging it. I feel like I need to be accountable to someone and my family isn't emotionally available. I've gained 8 pounds since mid November.
Old habits have crept back in and I'm falling back on old and new excuses. "My family doesn't eat healthy. Everyone gains weight over the holidays. One extra treat won't hurt. I'm under extra stress. "etc. etc. etc. The bottom line and the truth is that I am eating too much and not healthy foods and I'm not getting my exercise in. It is more difficult since I no longer have access to a computer on a regular basis so I have lost most of my support network. (I have to either go to the library or find spare moments at work.) But I can still keep track of calories on paper.
How do I find new motivation? How do I turn it over to God again and leave it there? I know (from repeated experience) that I can't do this but God can. How do I get back to that place and stop the stupid lies and excuses?