Blood oranges, sweat, and tears...

Thursday, January 15, 2009

In between trying to condition my body and become healthy I find that life happens. I will do my best one day and eat all the right foods in the correct portion sizes, workout like a beast, then make it to work and I cave. Something gives out and I have to eat and even if I have my own food that is appropriate for me to eat with me (I work in a restaurant that serves lousy, bad for you food) I still manage to feel the need to not feel "left Out" when everyone else gets to eat the junk. I think it is the knowing better that is the worst because I know that what I'm eating will not be proper fuel for my body and yet I still do it. The nice thing that I am happy with these days is how much progress I have made on not completely throwing in the towel when I start to make poor choices. It used to be the ticking time bomb, i would eat something filled with empty calories and know I should have made a better choice so I push that guilt down with even more unhealthy food and the cycle perpetuates until there is literally nothing left to eat. I am the worst binge eater. I am constantly every single day working towards being in control and am extremely proud of my efforts but it is hard to read the number on the scale or measuring tape, I want to be back where I was and I know I have a lot of work ahead of me to get there. I told myself I would lose 1 pound a week from now until June 5th and I lost half a pound last week and am afraid in the next few days for that moment of truth but I am ok with a slow start I just want to continue to build momentum so that I can and will achieve my goals. So eat those blood oranges, run, run, run, run, sweat until you feel like you might cry and then pat yourself on the back and do again the next day....
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