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It's Time For Brutal Honesty...

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I've been living a very unhealthy lifestyle the past 3-4 weeks. Eating poorly every day, binging on junk food nearly every day, and barely working out. I've started hiding how much/what I eat from my family and friends, and I've spent a few evenings hiding out at home when I could have been hanging out/working out with friends. I have people counting on me to be a strong,positive role model for them and I'm blowing it, big time.

I know I'm an emotional binge eater but I've reached the place tonight where I have to honestly grab myself by the shoulders, shake myself until my teeth rattle, and tell myself "enough is enough!". No more excuses...if I binge now and then, it may be because I'm having a really bad day, but binging every single day and not working out routinely for weeks is a lifestyle choice, not a bad day.

So with brutal honesty, I changed my weight loss ticker to reflect the 8 pounds I've put back on in the past month, and let me tell you, THAT REALLY HURT! I've also changed my goal weight from 160 to 153 pounds.

So it's time to quit whining and time to start fighting. Because if I continue like this, I'll end up depressed, fat and miserable again!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon Honesty is hard, not so much because you admitted it to others, but because you admitted it to yourself1

    Good for you. That took a lot of strength.

    It's a new year now, and everyday there is room for a new beginning!

    There is new thing I heard about called The basic idea is that you can recommit yourself to your health every Monday...

    Sounds like a great idea to me!

    Good luck!
    3241 days ago
  • KATIE781
    I'm right there with you. You can get through this. HUGS
    3245 days ago
  • BONNIE627
    it is just the holiday season.. I too put on some weight but have not changed my tracker yet.. LOL you will get back on track now that the new year has started.. you can do this and we are here to help... hang in there it does get better.. hugs, Bonnie
    3246 days ago
    Treat yourself gently, try to start over and by that I mean, Drink your water and eat your fruit that's a good way to get back. Then it all seems so easy..

    Let's Spark 2009! Happy New Year!

    3247 days ago
    SHAREBEAR74, hey sorry you have been having a rough time this season. I TOTALLY understand, and at least you know that you aren't alone. I have seen lots of other people having a hard time during the holiday season. We just need to get up and try again by taking the small steps that will become leaps. Remember you aren't expected to be a perfect human being and these things happen (which is something I struggle to remember too).

    Also, I understand how strong emotions can be. I'm not sure if I'm an emotional eater but I did have an episode where I drowned my sorrows in a huge bag of chocolate and "punished" my husband by doing this (which in actuality I was punishing myself I think). Although these episodes are rare, when they do come they are very damaging. Now as I look back I can't believe how in control my emotions were. It kind of scares me. I think that is the key: to realize it and start dissecting it to better understand yourself? I also deal with depression (in my family it is hereditary). I know this summer I just laid on the couch and just didn't move and felt so worthless and that I deserved to feel that way. I don' t know what snapped me out, but I'm out now. That doesn't mean that I won't go back though, and I know it. I think what helps me is to blog when I feel certain emotions. Beforehand I bottled things up (another unfortunate family trait) and I think it just rotted in me until it came out. Is that the way it is with you? As the others said you may want to join a support group either virtually or in real life.

    I hope we are helping you. And I hope you continue to pull yourself up. It sucks but I think we will continue to fall into these little holes, but hopefully they will get shallower and shallower.

    You can do this.
    3247 days ago
    im sorry about the gain. but im glad you are looking at yourself, seeing what you can do to change it, and knowing that you do need to change your life again.

    you are really so right on. and it got to me about 3-4 weeks being a lifestyle choice and not a bad day.

    i know you will get back into the swing of things and will begin again to make great choices.
    3247 days ago
  • JIBBIE49
    3248 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/17/2009 3:00:08 AM
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