It's Time....to get back to ME!
Friday, December 05, 2008
Ok, it has been quite a while since I last updated this blog. Quite obviously. I have been away from SP for some time, without really meaning to, but sometimes life just gets in the way I guess.
Well, that is the purpose of this blog, while life was busy getting in the way and I was allowing it to deter me from the things that I should have been doing, and wanted to be doing, I was still losing weight. Not a whole lot by many people's standards, but as of today I have lost a total of 70 lbs.
Again, it may not seem like a whole lot by many people's standards, especially when you take into account that I started this journey on January 1, 2008. But for me its a huge accomplishment. I have done it the right way this time, no crash diets, no starvation, I was exercising regularly, which I am re-committing myself to doing. I was eating healthy, watching what I ate and when. Heck I even did really well on Thanksgiving, my usual BINGE holiday, well, that and Christmas. But I am committed to losing the weight even when it seems like I don't want to.
Eating better has basically stuck in my head above all other things. I do it without really trying now. Its just a pattern. Small portions and savoring what it is I am eating. It has made a huge difference.
Generally over the holidays everyone gains weight because they eat like wildfire. Not me, I knew my limits and I stuck to eating healthier than I normally would. Did I pass on the cheesecake, nope, I had a small piece to satisfy the craving. Did I binge on turkey and all the fixings, nope, I had a small amount of everything I wanted, which again, satisfied the craving.
For Christmas, I promised to make breakfast for everyone in my house, and I will. I am making my favorite Christmas breakfast of Overnight Caramel French Toast, Brown Sugar Bacon, Scrambled Eggs, Home Fries, and if I have the money and time homemade Corned Beef Hash. All the foods that mean Christmas to me. All the things most people would cringe at knowing that it means they are going to binge and gain weight. But, I know the key is moderation. Small amounts of everything and tracking are my friends!
But enough about the food and the holidays.
I have had a few big things happen in recent months that I am finally coming to terms with. In June, I left my boyfriend of 8 years. It was hard, but I did it for me, and because I knew that it was never going to get beyond the boyfriend/girlfriend stage, and at the ripe old age of 31 I knew I deserved and wanted more. We lived together for about a month after I left him, and in July I ended up moving in with a friend from work and her son. It was great, we were living the high life, both recently single, so we were partying like rockstars.
In August, someone I had been talking to and had a huge falling out with, decided to start talking to me again. Huge thing. We were sort of dating in June, fought big time in July, and didn't talk at all for just over a month. I had moved on, and was happy with where my life was headed, until he decided to come back into my life. Then I realized that I really did care about him, and things were finally starting to look up.
We stayed in that apartment until October. On October 1st our house was robbed of everything that had any monetary value, and some things that had more sentimental value than monetary value. By October 8th we were in our new and current apartment, on the third floor. Its beautiful...3 bedrooms, double parlor, kitchen, and pantry, with plenty of closets and storage space. A bonus is I knew the landlord previously because of my "brother", who lives right downstairs by the way.
Then I thought the poo hit the fan. Two Saturdays ago, just before Thanksgiving, my roommate decided to tell me at 9:30 in the morning as I was cleaning, that she and her son were moving out. She was uncertain of when, but she was definitely moving. At first I was really upset thinking that she was screwing me over, and then I talked to my friend and realized that I can do this, or I am going to die trying to succeed at something I am putting my heart and soul into.
So now, here I am. Currently alone in the house, enjoying the piece and quiet. And renewing my vows to get healthy and take care of ME!
Starting January 1, I am quitting smoking, yet again. I am going to start taking voice lessons, I can sing, but I want to be better at it, I am going to join the local Y to have a NICE gym to go to, I am going to rebuild me from the ground up. I am revamping my wardrobe, I am going to enjoy my life. I am hoping that my love life, or lack there of, will get better in the process, but if it doesn't, I am ok with that, because I will get what I want out of this life no matter what.
Patience is a virtue, and as such I must be the most virtuous person I know!