Friday, August 01, 2008
OK I know when I have hit my limit for walking. A small voice in the back of my head told me to get a wheelchair when we got to the zoo today. But I wanted to get my excersie in, so I walked. I took my cane and and was ready to burn off the calories!! (we walk around the zoo in a circle from right to left.) Yea by the time I got to the back right corner of the zoo I was in pain. By the time we got to the far left I was in LOTS of pain. So we made it towards the exit and I was walking super super slow. I left the stuff home to help with my pain, of course, but I didn't want to ruin it for my kids. It was a 30 min drive home so the time off my feet helped. I used the stuff I have for pain and went on with my day. Now it has all caught up with me. I am tired from the walk but am in so much pain I can't sleep. At 32 I shouldn't need a wheelchair just to take my kids to the zoo!!! I am just so angry that I am this way. The fact that I can't have a fun day with my kids without hurting so bad I can't sleep upsets me. I know all to well that there are plenty of other people out there in more pain than I am in. I don't want to offend them in anyway. It just upsets me that I was just doing my job, a job that I loved, and now not only am I missing out on life my kids are missing out on a parent that can do things and take them places. My son has no memories of me not being injured. I was hurt when he was little so he only knows me as someone that needs help doing a lot of simple tasks. I couldn't teach him how to ride a bike because I couldn't run along side him. I can't play soccer with him. I am the one that is supposed to take care of my kids. Not them taking care of me.