Saturday, July 12, 2008
Well I've decided to come out of hiding...that's what I do, I hide when I am afraid. I started out this year feeling very strong and pretty confident that I could get back on track and lose weight and I'm embarassed to say that I've done just the opposite. Not only have I NOT lost any weight, exercised consisently or changed my eating habits but I've actually gained 5lbs since January. Ah, just typing that in makes me feel horribly ashamed but it's true and I need to put it out there. Every day of my life is consumed with obessing about this weight, I feel SO sluggish and unattractive and yucky. I think that I've been telling myself "why bother, you have tried this a hundered times before and you never succeed" which I guess is true but what happens if I stop trying? I'll feel even more miserable than I do now...atleast when you're putting forth the effort you have that to feel good about. Soooo, all that being said, I'm back. I'm here putting it all out there and ready to give this another shot, I deserve that much and more than that my beautiful girls deserve to have a mommy that is happy and healthy. Here I am pizza, COME AND GET ME and I will kick your repulsive, greasy butt STRAIGHT to the trash....fried chicken? Just TRY it, ONE STEP FURTHER and it's straight to the garbage dispsosal with you! Oh and you over there, FASTFOOD?? If you even LOOK at me the wrong way I will BLAST you straight into OBLIVION! I'M BACK, DO YOU HEAR ME?!!!!