Friday, October 05, 2012
I stopped at the store after work...something I have been trying to put off due to...well, a lot of reasons. I got a text from my beau while I was there "guess who is moving out this weekend."
Thank God, the room mate has started to move her stuff! She took her bed and about half of the stuff in her room and will be getting the rest tomorrow.
We were out walking tonight while she was moving her stuff, my brain keeps trying to tell me that I am a bad friend for not offering to help her load stuff into the car....but then again, I would never take advantage of a friend the way she has, so, I really don't feel bad.
I had intended on walking 5k tonight, but we had a truck that passed us twice and was spraying for bugs (PeYew!), we finally resorted to walking back and forth in front of the apartment for awhile and watching her move stuff out. I was worried about a couple different things, for one...she has my desk in her room, a desk that she moved into her room "for one night", which was a several months ago...and I don't want it walking out the door with her. My anxiety got worse and worse until I finally told my beau that I was done with walking for the night. I don't think it would have been so bad if I had not been burned before, I have had room mates walk out with my things, things my dad gave me, my dishes, etc....I even had one walk out with every single bit of food in the house, down to the last can of beans.
I got 1.88 miles done with a 19'44 pace. I started out with my elastic ankle/foot braces on, thinking I would be nice to my ankles and before we got a half mile, the bottom of my right foot and ankle were screaming! I pause my Nike app and yanked the brace off...it was IMMEDIATE relief!
I can't wait until I get to the doctor on Monday so he can check it out, at this point, I would even take a shot in it, if that would help!
Things on the food front are going pretty good still, I got a bunch of good-for-us-stuff at the store today!
I also got a couple of sweet treats...I have been doing very well with portion control and have never had a problem with binging. I have a bigger problem overeating carbs than I do with sweets.
Tonight's dinner was turkey Italian sausages with baked tater tots (sweet tots for my beau) and some roasted fresh broccoli, and dessert was 2 devil's food cookies at 50 cals each, yummy! I had them along with some really good hot tea that I found. Its made by Lipton, its orange blossom hibiscus flavor...decaf and it has rosehips and other good stuff in it.
Now that I have my kitchen back to myself, I can get all my good stuff back in order. I have all of my grains and seeds back on the counter in their pretty jars, flax, amaranth, jasmine rice, flax meal.
I also have my big jar of a mixture of steel cut oats, wheat, flax seeds, and groats that I make in batches for breakfast throughout the week. Pop a couple cups of that stuff in the rice cooker and set the timer for the next morning...its perfect! (I don't even make rice in that thing!)
I have to work for a couple hours tomorrow and then when I get home, I am planning on cleaning out the fridge and moving all of our stuff back from the little fridge into the regular one. (she had so much junk food in there we ended up buying a small camping fridge just for our healthy food.) We will put the little one to use by putting our pre-made containers of food in there, then all we have to do is grab and go in the mornings before work!
My beau and I have a lot of hard work to do to catch things back up financially, but I am sure we can do it. We have been through rough times before and I am sure that we will get through this one as well.
We can do anything together.
Monday, October 01, 2012
September is completed.
1- Complete 1500+ minutes of fitness.
I fell even shorter on this goal than I did last month with only 619 minutes. I missed 12 days of exercise in September...so I improved by one day but my average times were shorter.
I know it is better than nothing, and I KNOW it has been a difficult month (6 weeks actually), for me with falling and whatnot, but to sit here and say that...it sounds and feels like a copout.
All I can do is what I can and as long as I am continuing forward, I can accept it.
I am renewing this goal yet again for October.
2- Lose 7 pounds.
I lost 3....I am not sure what to say about this. My first instinct is to be disappointed, but I am just glad that I lost any.
3- Lose 2 more inches from my waist.
I lost 1 inch...I'll take it! (Again!)
The goal is still 2 inches for October!
Since September's routine was not effective to my satisfaction, my new change-ups are:
1. Jogging/walking every other day, so will be out 3 days one week and 4 days the next.
2. Distance we will be doing is 5k every time, no more 1.25 miles at 22-24 minutes each.
3. Every OTHER day that we go out, I will be doing jogging intervals as long as I am able. I should be able to jog a bit longer each time.
I feel that I am doing quite well in what and how much I am eating. I will have to try to find time to track it again though, because I think that I am actually coming up short on calories most days...which might be causing my body to hang on to everything.
In other news...
I have a doc appointment on Monday, I plan to ask him to check my hearing...because everyone else mumbles, lol!
I also need him to check on all my bumps and bruises from falling...I actually have several unexplained bruises, I know I got them when I fell but they are on my shins, which I did not hit.
Also on the agenda is having him check on my knees, ankles, and right foot, I am worried that I have either another heel spur or plantar faciitis. He can give me a splint, or tell me how to massage it (tennis ball isn't working), or give me a cortisone shot....what he is NOT allowed to do is tell me to stop jogging or walking.
Yes, I know staying off of it, or off of hard surfaces is probably going to be the answer, but he will have to work around that one! Besides, all I have is hard surfaces to walk on...we have concrete floors at home, so another treatment will have to be found.
The room mate should be moving out at the end of the week, she pretty much let us know last night that she would not be coming up with any money any time soon and gave us a vague 'when I have money, I will pay you back' statement.
She did offer to sell my son a sofa that she has in storage for his apartment though....I went over there and verified that I heard correctly...to SELL it to him and I told him over my dead body. If he decides that he needs one, we will help him get one.
We have come to terms that we got screwed yet again for helping someone, and we will just mark one on our 'we're too nice for our own good' slate and move along.
C'est La Vie!
I am happy that October is finally here. Autumn is my favorite time of year, I am always more at peace in the fall for some reason.
As I sat at work today with the door open and smelling the clean air, I couldn't help but thinking what a perfectly fall day it is! It was cloudy and cool this morning but the sun peeked out here and there during the day. The wind picked up for a little bit this afternoon so that I could hear it blowing through the equipment outside which always reminds me of Winnie the Pooh and the blustery day!
Enjoy your cooler temps, changing leaves, pumpkins, and take advantage of the great outdoors!
Thursday, September 27, 2012
So, my beau had one of the guys from his work come and get him so he can get a few sales under him and boost his paycheck a bit. Which is WONDERFUL! We are so lucky that he has a manager that understands the problems we are having with the car and everything lately.
He didn't leave until this afternoon and I was getting antsy to go for a jog/walk....that is putting it mildly to be honest....I was ready to blow my top if I didn't blow off some stress and steam, so I HAD to get out of the house!
I sent him a text and told him that I was going to go for a walk around the block before it rained and got dark. I stayed near home because I know he worries and if I fell again or something, I would be close enough to limp home. Me? Fall? Surely not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyways, If I make the big circle around, it is a half mile....I made 2 laps and decided that I felt pretty good and was enjoying my music and the breeze that the storm was pushing in, so I decided to do another lap. Usually we do about 1.25 miles. After the third lap, I figured, what the heck, I am going to get a time on 5k and see if I have improved.
Lap 4 comes around and I am on the far side of the block from my house and noticed that something didn't feel right....I had been swinging my arms in the front of me around to the back then over my head to get rid of a bit of shoulder tension....I look down and sure enough, the girls have escaped!
Evidently, when I swung my arms back, my bra decided to unhook itself! I tried to keep my pace up with my arms clasped in front of me to keep everything inside my tank top....I sure didn't want any further wardrobe malfunction to scare the bejesus out of the neighborhood kids! I tried to keep going and stuck my water bottle in my mouth and tried like crazy to reach the straps behind me to no avail! I have never been able to get my shoulder joints to that position!
On my next pass in front of my house, I put my Nike app on pause and ran inside and made my roomie hook things back up and dashed back out the door!
Of course the very first time that my beau wasn't with me and look what happens!
So, I am thinking that is a NSV that will need to be remedied very soon! Baggy pants I can deal with....the Great Girl Escape....not so much!
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Yours too! Look at it, just look!
I am 40...which amounts to approximately 28 years of abuse to my physical being. Quick rundown...
I started smoking when I was about 12, got falling down drunk for the first time when I was 14, was raped and became pregnant, and had my first baby when I was 15.
Married when I was 18, had 2 more babies, and stayed in an abusive relationship for 12 years.
During those 12 years there have been more than a few...injuries.
There was more than one time that I drank myself into oblivion. I have blank spots in my memories of my life, some from alcohol, some from my mind trying to protect me.
I spent some time in the lowest pits of depression and dealt with the aftermath of self injury.
I ate what I wanted, when I wanted, and stayed uneducated on what was good for me and what was not.
One by one, I made changes to my life. I stopped drinking and I left my husband and found someone who made me feel pretty for the first time in my life, we were even happy for several years.
I even managed to drop a couple of pounds...albeit, I was doing it totally the wrong way, but I did feel a little better. I even checked out some yoga to do at home. I have always been a bit clumsy so needless to say, there were a few yoga induced bumps, bruises, and rugburns! The beginnings of yoga helped immensely with healing my inner self. Realizing who and what I am, the beginnings of realizing my self worth.
I found myself single again about the same time as my beau found himself single. We had been friends online for a few years at this point and everything just clicked for us. I found myself head over heels and my only unhappiness was in my body. About 6 weeks before I moved to be with him, I was in a minor car accident, major for the car, but minor in injuries for my friend and I.
I quit smoking and found a touch more happiness in the fact that I hardly ever snore anymore, lol!
My beau is nothing but supportive, almost to a fault. He helped me with my first major weight loss...about 56 pounds. I was on the 6 week body makeover and while it did work, and while taught me several things about the hows and whys of my body and its workings....it was not the right path for me.
Moving along...there is a point to all this, I promise!
I found SP through an ad....I think it was something on Facebook, it was for an article that looked interesting, I clicked it, signed up and promptly forgot about it for a month. I finally found a bit of time to check out the website and was immediately hooked. I can't tell you how much y'all inspired me!
I dropped a couple of pounds and by a couple, I mean like 2....and got another spark from my cousin on FaceBook. She and my other cousin ran a half marathon and I heard something in the back of my mind.
I WANT to be healthy, I WANT to feel good and have good food! I WANT TO RUN!
Thanks to you good people, I have the education, inspiration, and I have found the determination to get what I want!
I started my journey crying when I had to actually put my feet on the floor in the morning and asking them to bear me up yet again. I started in fear of a heart attack, stroke, or some other life altering or life ending event. I was afraid to move too much, afraid of falling and either needing help up or just being embarrassed in front of other people. I don't know which would be worse.
The recent events of my falls and mishaps have taught me something else as well. Not only did I fall and get myself back up, but I did not die from embarrassment either! My bruises have mostly faded, the lumps and bumps have mostly receded, my body even let me jog for 3 solid minutes yesterday! No knee pain, very little foot/ankle pain, no shin splints or side stiches.
My body is a wondrous creation! After putting it through hell and back for 28 YEARS, it still heals itself! All I had to do is get out of my own way.My body and mind may have strayed from the path, but neither one is broken.
I still make mistakes...I AM human after all!
But I learn from them, I appreciate them, I don't beat myself up about them. I work on healing my mind...which heals my body...which heals my mind, its a beautiful circle.
Love yourself and let your body do its thang!
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