ZELDABEE   5,021
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Hello Spark..oh my how things have changed

Thursday, May 08, 2014

So a lot have changed for me since my last blog in July, I finished my school term with A's but didn't get into the program I wanted. I was disappointed but life has a funny way of working out, instead of the acceptance letter I was eagerly awaiting in the mail I got a positive result on a test I wasn't even planning on taking - a pregnancy test..

So there I was, staring at the third positive pregnancy test in a row - because ya know it takes that many to know for sure - shocked and a little bit scared, this wasn't my first down this road and I couldn't help but feel a bit apprehensive. I wanted to be excited but my heart wouldn't allow me to think about all the things that could be just yet in fear that it would all end in disappointment and grief again. Pregnancy after a miscarriage is like living through a cold war with your body, your always waiting for the bomb to drop. Every ultrasound is nerve wrecking, every twinge a possible sign of the end.

BUT after 9 months of throwing up, mouth ulcers and a skin infection that put me in the hospital for week I got the most anticipated and best gift ever just two weeks shy of my 28th birthday...

Athena (Thea), was born April 16th, 2014 at 10:45am and weighted in at 7lbs 8 oz of beautiful baby girl. Being a mom is a little like having your heart sudden outside your body, that's the only way i can describe it - it's a feeling of overwhelming happiness mixed with the most scared I have been in my entire life. I want everything for her, I want her to know nothing but love and happiness but I know I can't protect her from the world forever. I know she will know pain because pain is how we learn about ourselves, it's what we do with that pain that defines us. I want her to be kind and generous but not a push over. I want her to be a leader but not a dictator...I want so many things for her and I don't know the first thing about being a mom but I guess we will learn together and in order to make sure i'm still around for all the important things she will need me for I have to get my health on track...

So here I am spark, you and I have both changed in the 9 months and now more than ever I have a reason to stay



  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FEARLESSNOW 5/10/2014 11:42PM

    I remember reading that last blog. Congratulations. Thea is beautiful.

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OLIVIANIGHT 5/9/2014 10:34AM

    Aw congratulations!!!

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GEORGE815 5/8/2014 8:29PM


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VIADOLOROSA 5/8/2014 8:11PM


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In need of a little patience

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

I need a little patience today. I gained Ė not a lot and it could be just water weight or the fact that my floors are not level in this apartment (seriously nothing is level here - I swear sometimes itís like living in a little crooked house) but nevertheless I gained. Granted I haven't been working out as much as I should but I was on track for calories, every mouth full has been tracked so Iím a little discouraged and trying really hard not to let that discouragement put me in a bad place for this week.

Iíve been a little stressed out because I have an exam on Saturday plus I should find out soon if Iíve been accepted into my program at school for the fall. I could really use a mental heath day from work but I just canít afford it right now.

The plan today is to stick to the plan, make the meals I had already picked out and tracked and try and muster up a positive attitude. I knew going in that there would be weeks like this but that doesnít make this any easier to deal with.

On a happier note, we got a new kitchen table over the weekend and a new pantry. When Davidís mom gets home from her trip she is going to make use some new place mats for the table and itís actually starting to look like a kitchen. We have recently started putting up more pictures and posters as well (only took up 6 years). I guess as Iím getting older I like the apartment to look more homey Ė not that batman posters and framed video game maps would be homey to most but it feels right for us.

emoticon Lacey

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEATHERFREE 6/19/2013 9:38PM

    ha love your guys' home decor! really I love it! I too am always struggling with impatience....I want to see five pounds gone in two days to tell me if what I'm doing is working, and I always screw it up on days three and four and five and then get angry when the scale has an even worse number. We just need to keep our minds on today and thats IT. Then the good will come.

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STEPH-KNEE 6/19/2013 9:07PM

    You are awesome and that pic you posted says it all! I need to remember that too. I am so anxious to get to Onederland that I get discouraged that I can't get there fast enough and it's frustrating. But we have to remember we are in this for the long haul and the ups and downs are something we can't always control. Just keep your head up and keep doing what you are dong and you will get where you want to go! emoticon

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ELLABELLE87 6/19/2013 7:57PM

    Love that image! Patience is so important for success. It's just a shame that we don't have more of it. lol. Don't feel so bad about the scale today. I know I'm not going to have lost as much weight as I had hoped this week -if any! Scale definitely crept up a little a few days ago (I think I was retaining water) -When it starts to look like my weekly weigh in might disappoint, It helps to remember my monthly goal or a longer term goal and remind myself that I'm still a day closer to getting there and another day ahead of where I used to be. -Just keep being awesome! Don't over-think it! You'll get there! :)

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JAMIELOGICAL 6/19/2013 3:14PM

    Hang in there. I know how much a bad weigh-in can bring you down. I have dealt with MANY myself and as much as I KNOW I should keep calm, my irrational side kicks in and it becomes VERY hard not to give into binging and emotional eating. Just try to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

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EMELEE82 6/19/2013 11:11AM

    No worries chicakadee!

Our bodies fluctuate a few pounds everyday.Even more for us ladies on some days.

If you are getting the nutrition part down that is GREAT! Don't let yourself get down about it.Maybe view it as a challenge? Like, "Oh really, Mr. Scale? Well I don't think so! Watch this!"

Take a walk, Zumba, Yoga, bike - do YOUR thing. It will come off and you'll know it before you even get on the scale or take measurements. You got this!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

PS: Hooray on new furniture! :D

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WVWISHIEFAY 6/19/2013 10:44AM

    I, too, have had a couple weeks like this! I was one weigh in away from stuffing my face with all the food I could find. I talked myself through it--I'd come too far to take it in reverse. A gain here and there, a plateau...they are bumps in the road, but they don't mean we can't meet our goals. We just push through and keep doing what we know is good for us! Stay strong and don't be discouraged!

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    An appropriate prayer: "Lord, give me patience.....NOW!"

Sometimes we gain a little. Look at the big picture, a pound heavier than last week, five pounds lighter than last month! Do not get discouraged and keep on keeping on.

Make Today the Greatest Day of Your Life!

emoticon So Far!

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A blog from my yoga mat...

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

I'm written this blog from my yoga mat...because I don't have the energy to stand up at the moment. See I decided to strap on my heart monitor and try out the diamond dozen for DDYP yoga which I have been meaning to try out for a very long time. I meant to do this last night but life happened...

ANYWAY It's really a tutorial on how to do the moves correctly and I thought (I could be completely wrong!) that I did pretty well consider..(considering I'm an accident waiting to happen) and when I was finished I felt like - hey I could do more and today is the last day before weight in so I probably should do more so I decided to continue on to the first work out...

and what a work out is was! I pretty sure I used muscles that I haven't used since childhood (or lets face it, ever!). I had to do some of the modified moves, but hey I was still doing the moves and I only had to go into the safety position twice so I feel pretty good out it. I'll be sore tomorrow but I'm going to call that victory pain.

Here's a picture post work out...I'm a hot sweaty mess...

but a happy hot sweat mess!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JAMIELOGICAL 6/12/2013 10:08AM

    Revel in your soreness! Just be sure to give your body a break.

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OLIVIANIGHT 6/12/2013 7:32AM

    Wow, well done! Looks like you had an awesome workout.

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STEPH-KNEE 6/12/2013 12:38AM

    You are amazing and you are a beautiful sweaty mess! emoticon emoticon

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WVWISHIEFAY 6/12/2013 12:15AM

    Didn't know you could sweat doing yoga--I'm impressed!!

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JERSEYGIRL24 6/11/2013 9:56PM

    Great job!! And you look great post workout emoticon

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HOPE4NESSIE 6/11/2013 9:16PM

    AWESOME. gonna have to check that out..

also what heart rate monitor do you use?

Comment edited on: 6/11/2013 9:16:36 PM

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DISTRESSEDM 6/11/2013 9:06PM

    Kick butt and take names!!!!! I'm gonna post my own sweaty pic later, you've inspired me haha! emoticon

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ANGGEL40 6/11/2013 8:47PM

    emoticon emoticon

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BLC 22 - My S.M.A.R.T Goals

Sunday, June 09, 2013

So I was going to do this yesterday but I got sidetracked by life and ranted instead - better late then never! Here are my goals for BLC 22...

emoticon I would like to lose 15 - 20 pounds - Now I know that sounds like a lot and I'm not usually one to hang my hat on a specific number however I believe it's doable. But the goal is to get as close to a 20 pound loss as possible.

emoticon Be accountable - this means tracking every BLT, staying within my calorie range and being caution of my sodium intake. This does not mean I won't have chocolate or burger for the next 11 weeks...it just means that I am aware and comfortable of the choices I am making.

emoticon I also wanted to make a goal to try new things - at least one new recipe a week. This is a little daunting to me but again I feel it's doable and a little push outside my comfort zone wouldn't be a bad thing. See I have never been what I would call a good cook - I mostly just heat things (I'm a excellent heater upper) and I think this has contributed to my weight, well no...I KNOW this has contributed to my weight among other things. I am willing to learn though and I think this goal with push me in the right direction!

emoticon This may seems like an easy one but it's a biggie for me. No soda except for my off/treat day(this is Sunday for now).

emoticon Walk somewhere (anywhere!) at least three times a week.

emoticon Get in some strength training as least three times a week, at the gym or at home. Even if it's only for a few minutes on my lunch - make an effort!

emoticon Take some times to relax during the week. Maybe yoga or some simple meditation to reflect and remember what's important.

So that's about it, I still have mini goals for the day/week that I like to met but those are the major goals I would like to stick too. (Most of them are just a repeat from my june goals blog). I'll leave you with this picture (Ignore the mess and the zombie poster lol!) of me in my new apron - a gift to myself to help with goal number three!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JAMIELOGICAL 6/10/2013 8:22PM

    Those sound like great goals. The one to try new recipes is one I should add to my July goals. I might steal it!

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STEPH-KNEE 6/9/2013 8:21PM

    Your apron is awesome and I love your goals! emoticon emoticon

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KRITTEN1 6/9/2013 7:58PM

    Great apron!! I hope you find many new foods that you enjoy eating!

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ALESTRA 6/9/2013 7:57PM

    Awesome goals!! Write down every victory! =) It makes the hard days easier to take! I love that apron! =)

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VEGANFITLADY 6/9/2013 7:42PM

    what does blc 22 mean? Good luck with your S.M.A.R.T goals! They sound good! emoticon

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