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Fit vs. Thin

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Yesterday I read this blog in the daily spark:

www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=is_
a_thin_body_celebrated_more_than_a_fit
_one


There was some controversy over the blog in the comments, as some of the commenters felt that too much emphasis was being placed on the alternative body time image (one of not just fit but powerful or athletic builds) and not accepting of the fact that some women would prefer slim over powerful. But it got me thinking. I can understand the appeal of slim and feminine--but why not strong and powerful as well?

I've been watching the Olympics, and more than once I caught myself thinking "that woman looks thick" or "big" when seeing the women in form fitting gear--never "fat" but still, each time that stray thought it surprised and dismayed me, because these women are not just fit, they are exceedingly fit--in far better shape than I ever hope for. And I never have this thought when it comes to the male athletes--just the women.

Why? Women Olympians have, as a rule, exceptionally low body fat compositions. Some of them have bigger frames to start with, but a big part of it is that they work out hard--driven, even--and have the muscles to prove it. Not a one of them has the kind of muscles you see on men--women don't develop muscles like that--but still they have a lot of strength--upper body, lower body, and core, and when wearing form fitting clothing, you can see it. They are incredibly fit, healthy women--from a physical fitness perspective, they, not those skinny models in their skinny jeans--should be my role models and ideals.

I can understand why some of the commenters are drawn to slim but less fit body images--for example, one of the downside of having such a low body fat percentage is that women athletes tend to have smaller breasts--breasts being mostly composed of fat, after all. Call it vanity if you like, but full breasts and visibly feminine hips are one of the few things I *like* about my body.

I'm not really worried though that my workouts will get rid of them or give me a more manly appearance--for one thing, my goal is to get down to a healthy weight/fat ratio--which is no where near as lean as serious athletes can get to. I have neither the time nor the dedication to get my body fat down that low. Similarly, I can look forward to fitter, trimmer, more muscularly defined arms and legs etc. without worrying too much about bulking up--I have no need or desire for that kind of muscles. I want muscles to facilitate every day activities--stairs, chores, walking, dancing, maybe play some pick up soccer or tennis matches, that kind of thing. I am not competing against the world's best in bobsled or luge or skiing or figure skating.

But what the blog made me wonder again why I didn't think "strong" "fit" or "powerful" when I saw some of these women athletes--and I think that she is right, it's in our cultural programming. The media--television, fashion magazines, etc.--have so skewed our ideal of "normal" or at least "slender ideal" that even exceptionally fit women don't always meet that impossible ideal. Not that long ago, Marylin Monroe was considered the epitome of female beauty--and I've read that she was a size 14 (though I don't know if that's a modern size 14 or size 14 of that time--not the same thing at all). Still, she certainly wasn't stick thin, and yet very attractive--yet by modern standards, many would criticize her for being chubby or over weight. By these standards, how can any of us hope to achieve the ideal? Or be healthy in process?

One of my exercise dvds has a woman instructor wearing a short top that stops shortly under her breasts, leaving her stomach and ribs mostly bare. Every time I see that video, I just want to feed her--all the bones in her ribs are clearly visible, she's so thin. She looks anorexic, though that doesn't mean that she actually is anorexic--she could be like my brother and just have a high metabolism or something. But still, this is the body type many of us want--tall, extremely thin, and yes, even beautiful and blond! And yet for most of us, this isn't healthy at all. It's like there's this disconnect between our body image ideal and the body reality--the real limits of what is healthy for our bodies.

I confess, I want to be thin again. I want to have my 26 inch waist back, to be 125 fit pounds again. Yet I know that when I was that thin, I could count my ribs, too. Is that healthy? Should that even be desirable? Back then, I was younger, more active, and had a high metabolism--I didn't have to worry about dieting and I certainly wasn't anorexic. But now, a decade older, with a metabolism I abused, I don't know if it's realistic--or at least healthy--to want that. My weight goal is 135 lbs--which brings me well within a healthy BMI, but still heavier than I was in high school and college.

And I want to be fit--what Sparks calls "FUNctional fitness" in that I want to be fit to better enjoy my every day life. I have (well, not so much the last two weeks, but in general) been working out fairly regularly--40 minutes of strength training 3 days a week, aerobic activity 5 days a week and sometimes an hour of yoga. I want to build up enough upper body strength to be able to lift and carry things without always having to ask a guy for help; I want a strong core to protect myself from back pain, and I want legs that can take me where ever I want to go--quickly, if I want/need to. I want the freedom of independence, to make choices based on what I want to do, not what I'm able to do.

And I'm making progress. I can feel the muscle tone improving, especially in my legs. I can lift heavier weights now than I could a year ago. My physical therapy/weight training is also helping to build up muscles I'd lost in my legs and hips (slowly, painfully--I hate the physical therapy part because it hurts emoticon Take care of yourselves, my friends, because therapy stinks) but my hips are finally getting the rest of the way better and not hurting all the time--unless I stop working out (a good motivator to keep going).

And it may be that someone will see me--maybe a friend who hasn't seen me since my skinny days, for example, or a stranger--and think "that woman is thick and/or big." And you know what? I don't really care, so long as I'm healthy fit and slim (which is different from skinny--slim means not pudgy or chubby or overweight, where as skinny means overly slim). I want to be feminine and slender, but I would rather be fit and trim than skinny. The problem then isn't my body but rather our culturally skewed perception of it. I want to have lean muscles, feminine curves, and flexibility. And if that means only losing down to 135 lbs--or maybe even only down to 145 (still, I believe, within my healthy BMI), than so be it. The scale isn't what matters. And maybe I won't be doing a triple axle any time soon, but I want to be out there, living my life, enjoying it--healthy and fit, feminine and slim.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GONNA_BREAKAWAY 2/25/2010 1:47PM

  I'm still obsessed with the idea that you can never be too thin...I still have almost one year and one hundred pounds to lose ( i set that my weight goal at 120 in case my doctor or dietician over found me one here)...but I still have one year to change my attitudes...

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KOMAL53 2/25/2010 1:16AM

    I love you and your attitude both---that's why you're very dear to me!!!However I do agree----all this fetish about losing weight to look emaciated---not my idea of Beauty at all!!!Maybe coming from a culture that has always loved curves---the ancient Temple Carvings are a testimony to that----I genuinely can't see any Beauty in thinness.I too believe in controlling weight----to remain healthy and fit but starving oneself is not my idea of Health either!!!As for Doctors and Hospitals----I've had enough to last me a lifetime---the remaining period of course.They are painful---but I guess necessary to help us get better!!!
emoticon emoticon

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 2/24/2010 5:46PM

    I read the same blog. This is a great discussion that makes me stop and think about my own thoughts and prejudices. I haven't been watching the Olympics this year. However, I have in years past and I find myself making some of the same comments. I think you are right in that we have been so bombarded by the general media about who is "Hot" and who needs to shed a few pounds that we have a very skewed idea of what looks good. I see many of the top models/actresses today and think they are way too thin, but still when looking at a speed skater or skier I see their thigh and proportions look too large.

I have stopped watching most TV and I think I am looking at healthier bodies rather than skinny or thin. I hope my prejudices change so that I look and see healthy/strong not just thin. I am working towards a healthy weight for me now. Although a part of me would love to get back to my college weight (120 - 125) it will probably never happen. First I don't want to put in that much time and effort. Second my DH thinks I look great now, he doesn't want a "skinny" wife. He does want a healthy, strong wife. So I'm working towards that.
Cyndi

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PRAIRIECROCUS 2/24/2010 3:32PM

    Thanks for taking the time, to write a discussion on this topic !
I agree with you completely !

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SAASHA17 2/24/2010 3:28PM

    I agree its programmed into our brains..I also agree when i see those skinny people and think "is that healthy?"...i agree on the atheletes..they are not skinny but man they have amazing bodies....just not skinny..just coz their ribs dont show doesnt mean they r not fit...

its weird how people say that...I have skinny friends who are tired always and have no body definition...

I think i wud rather have boobies and a defined body than being skinny and haggard all the time...I want to be healthy not death incarnate when i say i want to lose weight:)

ehhehe

manas
a

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DARKANGELKISS88 2/24/2010 2:22PM

    It is true. I too look at the Olympic women and say. hmm she's not exactly skinny. But I do admire them tremendously

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Torn

Monday, February 22, 2010

I did the math. If I work out my normal schedule all week AND do yoga, I'll be able to get my 1000 minutes for February.

Except I feel really crummy today. I was starting to feel under the weather last night, woke up last night sneezing and struggling to breathe, and am coughing and stuffed up today.

Bah humbug. I really want to get back on track--I'm even wearing my work out clothes--but I just don't know if it's a good idea since I'm still stuffed up and coughing and generally feeling lousy.

Discretion may be the better part of valor today.

But I'm sooo tired of getting sick all the time.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MYLOVELYCURVES 2/23/2010 11:11AM

    I know how you feel! I had to skip last week's workouts altogether because I just wasn't feeling well enough to exercise. As frustrating as it is, it's best to listen to your body and give it time to get better. You'll be working out again in no time!

Feel better soon!! :)

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RAIN454 2/22/2010 5:08PM

    HI, Zanna
I found myself in a similar predicament yesterday...put my gym clothes on and just sat around for a couple of hours, "planning" to workout...the only difference is that I wasn't sick! :P I think you should just rest until you feel better...sometimes, working out only makes matters worse. Hope you feel better soon though! Take care. -Rainey

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 2/22/2010 4:07PM

    If you want to get in the exercise minutes, just do some lighter intensity exercise. I find that when I'm congested that a light workout can help clear everything out faster. I just walk or Wii Fit. I don't do the Tae Bo or try to jog at all.

Feel better soon!
Cyndi

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PRAIRIECROCUS 2/22/2010 2:09PM

    You have just been under a lot of stress, with your computer woes !
That can really wreak havoc on your immune system !
I recommend that you take a few days, just to stop and "smell the roses."
Take some time, just for you !
After some "time off ", you'll hopefully be refreshed, and able to tackle
your projects anew !

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GAL8DY 2/22/2010 1:46PM

    Sorry you're under the weather. But sometimes working out makes me feel better. Probably all the endorphins.

Hope you feel better soon.

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CATLOVER7731 2/22/2010 1:25PM

    I am sorry you are feeling so bad. .Take some extra vitamin C that helps me alot. Feel better soon.
Cheryl

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Torn

Monday, February 22, 2010

I did the math. If I work out my normal schedule all week AND do yoga, I'll be able to get my 1000 minutes for February.

Except I feel really crummy today. I was starting to feel under the weather last night, woke up last night sneezing and struggling to breathe, and am coughing and stuffed up today.

Bah humbug. I really want to get back on track--I'm even wearing my work out clothes--but I just don't know if it's a good idea since I'm still stuffed up and coughing and generally feeling lousy.

Discretion may be the better part of valor today.

But I'm sooo tired of getting sick all the time.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SAASHA17 2/22/2010 4:05PM

    take rest Zanna..u dont want to aggravate whatever you are coming down with..if u feel better after sometime, u can workout..dont strain urself..

Manasa

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Torn

Monday, February 22, 2010

I did the math. If I work out my normal schedule all week AND do yoga, I'll be able to get my 1000 minutes for February.

Except I feel really crummy today. I was starting to feel under the weather last night, woke up last night sneezing and struggling to breathe, and am coughing and stuffed up today.

Bah humbug. I really want to get back on track--I'm even wearing my work out clothes--but I just don't know if it's a good idea since I'm still stuffed up and coughing and generally feeling lousy.

Discretion may be the better part of valor today.

But I'm sooo tired of getting sick all the time.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KOMAL53 2/23/2010 4:08AM

    Dear Zanna---you young guys are so impatient!!!First get well---the rest can follow in good time!!!Stressing yourself won't get you anywhere---I've learnt this the hard way---trust me stress NEVER works!!!Look at me---that stupid scale keeps showing the same weight no matter what I do--so I've decided to throw it out---but to stay on track by eating right and doing all the right things.Someday the Almighty will bless me----Hope springs eternal in the Human heart!!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FINDINGMYWAY09 2/22/2010 1:38PM

    maybe take it slow today for your workout just walk.

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Quick Update

Friday, February 19, 2010

Just a quick up date to let everyone know that I'm alive--I just haven't had very reliable computer access. I do have a new computer--it's very shiny and pretty and lighter than my old one yet with a lot more memory etc., so very cool. My old one was pretty dead--definitely a hard drive issue,possibly other issues as well. It may still be possible to salvage the files off the hard drive, I don't know yet, though if I don't get that data soon I'll have to redo at least the work on my diss. Sigh. Unfortunately, my new laptop doesn't have a lot of software on it, including MS office (need that for my diss) and anti-virus (won't get on line without it) so until the software gets installed (which will take awhile) I won't be using it much. Hopefully some of that will get done this weekend, though we're doing birthdays again and my husband (who will be doing the installing) has to work.

This past week and a half has really been a mixed bag for me. I've been really stressed out about the whole computer situation--I find it really stressful to sort through computer options to figure out what will be a good purchase (and am still not 100% confident I chose wisely) plus the whole hard drive issue since I still don't know if the hard drive can be salvaged, or even how much I've lost if it can't be. I have had horrible insomnia (a self sustaining cycle unfortunately once it gets going) and I have discovered that when I'm stressed I may not especially want to eat (food=ick when stressed) but I do tend to drink way too many caffeinated soft drinks (sugar ones too, so BAD), a tendency I restrained but not entirely successfully. And a tendency to crave chocolate, which apparently doesn't fall into the food=ick category, maybe because chocolate makes you feel better (chemically, not just psychologically) or perhaps because I crave sugar when stressed--always have (pixie sticks and Mt. Dew used to help get me through major deadlines). And while I have always read that exercise is supposed to help with stress, it didn't help me at all--way too much time on the elliptical or when doing weights to think of everything that could go wrong/be lost. So I ended up retreating into books and games and watching tv (specifically the olympics. It's very rare for me to watch tv--in the last 11 months, this is the first time I've watched more than a few minutes of television, and I've been watching hours of the olympics). So very atypical of me and not especially healthy.

It's not all bad, though. I did go to the fitness center today and at least haven't lost much, and if I go to yoga tomorrow as planned I'll get my 130 minutes for the week and may still be able to squeak in with 1000 minutes for the month. I drank my water. I ate a fair amount of vegetables and tried to remember to eat regular meals (not always successfully) and they were sometimes even healthy and I restrained from drinking gallons of Mt. Dew and mountains of chocolate, even though I did indulge more than normal and probably went over my calorie counts (I haven't logged food because of the unreliable online access. Technically, I can do it on my phone, but it's a pain).

I feel like I slipped pretty hard off the wagon but I didn't fall off entirely and I'm getting back on.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 2/19/2010 6:44PM

    Hope your hubby both gets your software installed and your files back from the old hard drive. I know how hard it is to concentrate when so stressed. I think you are doing fantastic. You have limited the caffeine intake, which you said yourself is an improvement from the past.

Taking time to watch the Olympics could inspire you once the dust settles and you are up and running on your new computer. I wish you and your hubby joy, peace and the internet!
Cyndi

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PRAIRIECROCUS 2/19/2010 4:06PM

    I'm still really hoping that your husband will be able to retrieve all your diss. material !
That sure would be fantastic.
It would be nice to have this all nicely resolved, so that you can get Sparking again !

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