Tuesday, January 08, 2013
Well, I'm back. Food-wise, my life fell apart and the whole time I was thinking that I was enjoying myself. Now I have gained back all the weight and then some and I don't have any energy. None of my clothes fit and my self esteem has gone back down. Any way, I decided that I don't like living like that and to come home to Spark People. I am back to making baby steps to great health, but I am making them.
While I was gone some really great things happened. Hubby got a CPAP machine and now he is sleeping better and QUIETER. I am sleeping better too.
Both the boys are living on their own now. That leaves Dez and Ani with us, but Dez seems to have problems that are interfering with her getting a job or going to school. She is seeing working on those problems and we are very content to have Ani around.
Speaking of which, That little monkey is up to my chin now. She will turn 8 next month. I can't believe how quickly that times goes.
After Lott died, we adopted another cat, William. He grew up in a cat shelter and was used to having lots of friends so we adopted a second cat, Summer. She is more a loner, but they play together and are typical siblings trying to make sure that the other doesn't get more food or loving. Then in late September, two older kittens showed up in the yard. Max and Sissy will be a year old next month. We had them fixed and they are up to date on all their shots, but they live outdoors. I couldn't imagine cleaning up after FOUR cats and a granddaughter.
Well, more later. My ride is here to take me to work.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
When did I turn my life over to the computer??? I sit at one all day at work. I use it to keep in touch with friends and family. I relax by playing games online and learn about current events through web pages. I don't watch television. Either the shows are repeats or stuff that I just don't want to watch.
Last night I found out that the computer that I thought was my friend betrayed me and stabbed me in the heart. ALL the digital pictures that we had stored on the computer are gone. We bought the digital camera before we became grandparents. Ani will be seven next month. So let me see, all the pictures of Ani, of Lott the Cat, of my son's graduation from college, special trips that we have made, family get togethers, holidays...they're just gone.
My husband warned us that he was going to work on our computer and to backup everything we wanted safe. I told him to please backup the pictures and he said that he did. However, the upgrade didn't go smoothly and the computer went into the shop several times. Still, I was comfortable because I knew the pictures were backed up off the computer. Last night I wanted to post a new picture of Ani and there were none. I asked where they were. DH said that he couldn't find them. I didn't hear much after that. I believe that he said that he couldn't find the files on the CD or just couldn't find the CD. This man took college courses on computers and worked part time as a technician so he knows what he was doing.
In the end, I went to bed furious and not able to blame anyone. The bottom line is, those pictures are gone whether by his mistake, a computer error, or cosmic rays killing that part of the computer. I cried a lot, got a nasty headache, got back up and consoled myself with half a bag of ruffles (full size) and onion dip. I went back to bed, slept fitfully, and this morning still have a nasty headache, an upset stomach, and my attitude could crush an elephant. At least I ate a healthy breakfast, a banana and cup of yogurt.
Please, back up computer files that are important to you, especially ones that are unique to you and not found out on the web. This is really depressing and l would hate for anyone to go through this.
Now, I am going to see what pictures I have shared with people and if they still have them. I think that I also have some on a thumb drive that I carried back and forth to work.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
So I had a really good walk this morning. I walked two miles in 30.5 minutes. During my walk, I felt great. I was right there in the groove. I felt proud of myself, I was having fun and I didn't hurt.
See, I've had a near constant pain in my left hip that can cause my knee and ankle to hurt also. But today, while I was walking really fast, I didn't ache at all. It was great.
Then I finished my two miles and slowed down. Immediately, my hip started hurting. Had it waited until after I cooled down and sat for a few minutes, I would have understood better, but this one really confused me.
So, now I have an appointment with my doctor on the 23rd to review my normal health issues and talk about my hip. In the mean time, I will continue to walk and see how that affects the pain.
In the meantime, we will be going to Pensacola on Friday after work to visit my brother-in-law and nephews for the long weekend. New challenges all the time.
Friday, January 06, 2012
Well, last year I did so well for the first half the year. Then things just seemed to slowly fall away. I kept pushing how much I could eat without gaining weight. Then, I started getting moody (probably because I wasn't eating as healthy) and my left leg started hurting. I started gaining. I was getting frustrated by my family wanting all the less healthy foods they were used to like fried foods and desserts, that I started making them again. Then my cat died and I started eating everything because it set off a bunch of emotions that didn't get dealt with when my dad died in 1993. I stopped feeling up to being healthy. In December, I looked in the mirror and realized that I had gained back 20 pounds of the 37 pounds I had lost since January. So my new years resolution is to get back to being healthier.
My left leg is continuing to hurt, but I am trying to walk regularly again. I had gotten up to 4 miles a day sometimes doing it as fast as 1 hour. Today I pushed myself to walk 3 miles in 50 minutes and am pretty worn out. I can't tell if my leg is doing better with the walking or worse. I need to see the doctor next week so I will tell her about it.
I have been trying to work on portion control and do well while I am at work, but when I get home, I start getting into everything. There is a lot of tension in the house and that doesn't help the emotional eating. Still, I have to realize that I call the shots on what I eat and I need to start saying no to some things and reach for other food instead. Intellectually, I know this.
For now, starting back at the beginning again should help point me at the areas that I need to work on. One medium term goal is to be more fit when I go to San Diego for two weeks in March. I grew up there and my husband wants to celebrate his birthday there. My brother and his family still live there and my sister will be flying in from Des Moines too so it will be a mini-family reunion. Last year I told my brother that I would walk with him every day and he walks 4 miles a day. My sister is the oldest of the three of us and I always admired her beauty. She was really thin to my overweight. I would like her to see me healthier and weighing better than she has seen me in over 20 years.
For now, my goal is to learn to control my portions by recording my food in the tracker, walk 10 miles a week, get into strength training for 10 minutes 3 times a week, and work on learning my triggers.
Small victories: Today I bought a sub sandwich for lunch, but I had a cup of fresh pineapple with it instead of fries or chips. It's a start.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
I am sitting at my computer on the morning of New Years Eve. The house is still quiet since everyone else is still asleep. I have a lot to do today. My mom always told me that the mess you left when the new year started would stay with you all year. I have learned that I can change that, but it doesn't change the fact that my house needs some cleaning up.
The family is going to be staying home to kick off the new year and we tend to make a lot of finger food to munch on all evening. I will make traditional party food, but slip in more vegetables too. As I sit here writing, I realize that a nice fruit salad from the market would be good too.
I am planning on being more vigilant in my battle to be healthier. You could say that I have been sleeping with the enemy, but I think that we have just been eating together too much. I haven't had time to walk so much and my left leg has been hurting so Excuse has been sitting at the table too often. He also reasons with me when I am choosing what and how much to eat. Then again his brother, Gluttony, just sits there adding more food to my plate. The Emotions, especially Self Pity, get in there too, and that just gets too hard to deal with.
I want to be happier, healthier and more active like I was last May so I am starting all over again with SP and I am rejoining the Diabetes Challenge. I know that all this works and that I can do this.
This is my New Years resolution: I will be healthier, happier, and more active in 2012 by following the Spark People program and working to overcome my food enemies.
I hope that you all have a wonderful 2012 and reach you goals. God bless each of you.
Get An Email Alert Each Time YAQUINDN Posts