Tuesday, February 05, 2013
This month is off to a very busy beginning. I've been swamped with volunteer and side-job projects and my social calendar is starting to fill up. All of this activity is a refreshing change from my quiet, laid back schedule. What it means, is that I don't have as much time to consistently blog.
I am struggling to maintain my new eating habits. This time of year, I turn into a slug. All I wanna do is eat carbohydrates and sleep. So it's a good thing that I have activities to distract me. If I get too bored, I get depressed, then I fall into the eating/sleeping pattern, which is not good.
So, I'm allowing for myself this time of year. I had forgotten what an uphill battle it is for me to function when there's so little daylight. I'm starting to shift my focus away from dropping the remaining 15 pounds to just keeping up the healthiest eating and exercise habits possible so I don't totally relapse.
Superbowl weekend was rough. I ate way too much! On a brighter note, I consistently hit the gym. Today I had dental work done, so it's no surprise that I hardly ate anything at all. My workouts this workweek have been torpedoed by my volunteer obligations. If I don't get any exercise tomorrow, I'm sure I'll be stir crazy.
This sounds odd, but I'm starting to feel "fat" again. Is my mind's eye playing tricks on me or am I reminding myself that I still have work to do? For example, in my body combat class the other day, I realized I was the biggest person in the room. I also got some pictures taken and (once again) looked busty and dowdy. On other days, I look in the mirror and I'm quite pleased with myself. I haven't reconciled the two images in my mind I guess, but it's a challenge.
Guess I'll close here. It's bedtime, so I'd better rest so I can make wide food choices tomorrow.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
This week, I attended three Body Combat classes. They are rigorous! According to the instructor, Sparkpeople and most calorie counters, I'm burning off about 700 calories a session. I sweat buckets and drink tons of water during the class.
I've noticed this week that I've been extremely hungry. It could be hormonal, but the difference this week has been the classes. I think I undid all the work of these classes with my eating. The good news is that I'm eating at maintenance; the bad news is that I've added on some of the water weight I lost doing South Beach Phase 1.
So what's best? A 1,200 to 1,500 calorie diet with moderate exercise? Or a 1,500 to 2,000 calorie diet with rigorous exercise? I haven't crunched the numbers so I don't know.
I'm trying to direct myself to healthier choices when I'm hungry, but I haven't entirely succeeded. The only thing I can think of to do is some menu planning and shopping next week, so I can eat hearty but good for you foods like soups, casseroles and chili.
All I can do is try it out and go from there.
Friday, January 25, 2013
I had grown bored with my fitness routine to the point where I was dreading another day spent on the treadmill/bicycle/elliptical. My new gym offers Body Combat classes and I just took my second one yesterday. It's a combination of kickboxing, tai chi, karate and self-defense moves. Lots of kicking, punching and "controlled aggression." My instructor is fit, friendly and knowledgeable and she really pushes the class. My classmates are diverse and many of them are helpful and friendly. Plus, I estimate I'm burning about 500 calories per class.
I plan to attend these classes 3 days a week and supplement with two days of strength training. I'm glad to have a fresh workout routine in place. Now I can look forward to going to the gym instead of dreading it.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
As I continue to look back on my journey, I've started re-reading some of my earlier blog posts. It's a good way to remember where I was. Thought I'd share a blog I posted a few years ago before I had even started losing the weight. Notice how I still had that black and white thinking about "dieting."
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
It is often said that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. My first step will start with my official weigh in on Saturday. In the meantime, I continue to prepare my mind and my spirit to begin this journey. I spent the day in prayer and meditation and asked for God's guidance through this time. I consider myself a spiritual person, not overtly religious, so for me a higher power is necessary. Dieting is a mental struggle and requires the sustained ability to give up today's little pleasures for a bigger, more meaningful reward tomorrow. In today's instant gratification society, dieting is especially difficult. I know a lot of experts prefer the euphemism "lifestyle change', and it is. But anytime you are modifying your eating habits to lose weight, dieting is what I call it.
Today, I announced to my friends and family my plans to lose weight. Usually, I'm so private about stuff like dieting, but I need all the accountability I can get. For now, I want to review all the reasons why I'm doing this.
10 reasons I want to lose weight in 2010
1. So I can look nice in my clothes.
2. So I can look younger (black women don't wrinkle as we age; we get fat).
3. So I can feel attractive and confident.
4. So I can be more attractive to men.
5. So I can raise my self-esteem.
6. So I will have more energy.
7. So I can look good in a swimsuit.
8. So I won't be the "big girl" at parties and social events.
9. So I won't wanna hide when someone pulls out a camera.
10. So I can feel a sense of accomplishment.
I'm sure I can think of more reasons but this is a good start. Although I haven't weighed, I like to break up my efforts into smaller "baby steps", so I intend to focus on 10 lbs at a time and build in some non-food rewards along the way. I also need to focus on how I will get my exercise. Should I join a gym? Buy a stationery bike? Move to some DVDS? Walk outdoors in frightful, 20 degree and snowy weather? I need to make up my mind, for real. Also, what time of day? I think mornings are best. I hate gettin' up early, but I think I'll work out more consistently if I do.
I also need to write down what I eat. I don't care for that either, but I need to put my big girl panties on and quit whinin' about what I don't like doin' and focus on my passion for gettin' to goal.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
How many times have you read that losing weight is not a sprint but a marathon; not a quick trip but a journey. Lots of times? Well, me too. Problem is, I haven't done a good job of internalizing this knowledge on an emotional level. I've wanted all of this weight gone since day 1.
But 385 days later, I'm finally settling down. Sure, I know there's still 12 pounds to go. I'm realizing though that I'm the only one who cares. If I were 5 feet tall, maybe a 12 pound change in my weight would be noticeable, but since I'm taller I know from life experience that people don't notice a weight change on me unless it's 20 pounds or more. What does that mean?
When I was 55 (yes, 55!) pounds heavier, I fantasized about how different my life would be and how all my problems would disappear. Today, while sitting in my office at work, a new self-talk script "clicked" in my head:
Q: How will your life change once you're 12 pounds lighter?
A: I will be proud of myself for achieving a healthy BMI and finishing something I've started.
Q: Good. And then what?
A: Then I'd have to MAINTAIN the loss.
Q: Maintain your weight doing what?
A: Pretty much what I'm doing now.
Q: So what's the hurry?
Isn't that silly; I've been HEARING this message for a long time. Now I'm LISTENING. Finally, I get it on an emotional level.
So now, I'm feeling more at ease. Yes, I still want to lose the 12 pounds in 3 months. I'm not going to lie; but I also know that the habits I've picked up during this long and winding road to better health are habits I'll need to maintain FOR LIFE. What choice is there? Go back to what I was doing before? I KNOW where that road leads;
THAT road leads to...
high blood pressure
hip or knee replacement surgery
needing a scooter to shop at Walmart
covering my stomach with a pillow when I sit on the couch
standing in the back of a group picture so I can hide my body
avoiding swimsuits or swimming
dropping out of the dating scene
lack of energy
shopping in plus size stores
wheezing after climbing a few flights of stairs
Instead of agonizing over these 12 pounds, I am following the advice of my SP friends and really reflecting more on how far I've come. Thinking about it calms me down and helps me understand that losing the weight is a by-product of my healthier habits. Since I intend to maintain these habits for the rest of my life, the 12 pounds will come off when it's time.
Onward and downward.
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