Monday, December 10, 2012
Thank you for all the messages and goodies since last time, much appreciated, and thank you for those who light a candle it is placed in a English church and i saw many there, i ask reverend who they were for many was for Aithley.
I went to Cape town to pick up my sister belongs, it was hard thing to do, because her bed had of her lively scent. She hand a tendency to always use aroma shampoos and things and that is how it smelt, almost like she was still there. I wish she was, and she was alive but it isn't so, i am finding it hard to deal the fact my sister is gone and i won't see her anymore, i feel like she is alive her spirit, and it glows bright around those that she meant a great deal to.
I went to cape town Wednesday the 5th. And came back yesterday. Anja awoke on Saturday. When i went there i held her hand and prayed. She looked better than what my sister did, but seeing someone in a coma is also not very nice to see. But i am glad that she came out alright, i spoke with her, we both cried as she did not know of Aithley's fate. She said that Aithley was trying to fight for the both of them, for their lives and if it wasn't for Aithley maybe she too be the same fate as my sister. I will keep contact with this girl, i feel like i owe it to Aithley. Anja was last one to see her alive. Sad part of it, Aithley was due to be home 16th of this month, and we would of had a great Christmas gathering. But now Christmas will be a dark side for us , having loosing someone so close to Christmas it is hard, we will not celebrate it as we usually do but we will have a small dinner together, there will probably be alot of silences due to my sister's passing.
Anja seemed to get stronger and eat normal by the time i left. David seems like a nice bloke too, i see why my sister had fancied him, he would of been a good husband to my sister i believe.
Krystle and I have planned a date 20 May 2014 for our wedding. We may use some of my sister ideas she had some ideas and plans for being our bridesmaid, we didn't replace her instead we just have the 2 bridesmaid and the maid of honor, Aithley was to be the 3rd bridesmaid.
Since Aithley had no man nor children, her items, house and such went to our parents. But Krystle and I will use her house, since we were living with my parents in their farm house in York and Aithley has a nice house in London, for work it is about same distance or maybe in future we can find something closer to London. So we have our own space, i feel her spirit at home though. And for sometime i probably will.
I believe Aithley is an Angel watching over us.
Sunday, December 02, 2012
I seemed to have been drawn to this site i don't know why, i guess it could be Aithley telling me look. And boy i didn't expect so many spark mails, replies to the last note and those so called goodies items. It is overwhelming and nice feeling that she touched the lives of many people. I do miss her. And nothing i can do can bring her back, i looked through some of the blogs she posted. And some team groups she belonged to to see what the fuss is about of sparkpeople, i am really glad she found such sight to help her through her weight struggles, She always seemed to have struggled with weight, most people says she looks like grandma, reasonably tall and round. And always smiled. That too was Aithley, and i loved her. I remember the nicest memories of her smile and end up crying. I never thought i would outlive my sister, She was just 25 and had done so much with her life alot more than i have.
I lit a few candles for her on this page. If you want to do so too here is a link londoninternetchurch.org.uk/worship/
I also donated to the organisation she worked with for abroad. Here is the link to that www.msf.org.uk/ I know she often worried about there not being enough funds for her continue with her work.
On top of things i keep thinking, if she stayed in cape town 2 weeks more, she be safe at home, she was due to come back 16 December. But i know she wouldn't have had any regrets doing what she did. And i am proud of her
I spoke with people at the Aids center where she last worked in Cape Town. Anja is still in a coma, but is stable, and she is showing more signs that she will come out of it which is good, i would like to talk to her, since she was the last person to have seen Aithley alive. Plus i need to go to Cape town and collect Aithley's belongings, i don't want my parents to go they are elderly and i don't want the same fate happen to them, as it is known young females and elderly are main targets there. I heard the men who are accused for assaults on my sister and her room mates have been found, but it is not known what the consequences are for them, it was a series of 3 men. But sad thing is this happens often in Johannesburg, it may be beautiful but some places you really need someone strong to protect you from things like this. I just miss her , I wish i was there to protect her.
Her body arriving in England was not what i expected, i always pictured her with perfect complexion, And a beauty, but taking my parents to see her body when it arrived it was hard, you could hardly recognize her, she was blue and black from what happened to her. Her funeral was yesterday, was a beautiful day i must say. We chose to do a closed casket because of the state she was in. My dad made a beautiful memorial table at home for dear Aithley.
I see there is alot of people that wants me to keep updated on Anja, well i probably go to Cape town in a week or 2 to pick up the things and i can tell you more then. Thankyou for the support you have given to me and my family. Although some people mistake Riley as our surname. It is her 2nd middle name. Our surname isn't Riley. I placed it as a C. for the surname, as i don't know if she told our surname so i didn't want to give out too much.
I miss you Aithley.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Not sure if i am doing this correctly. But i think it is how Aithley explained it to me. I am her brother Adrian she said she mentioned me a few times so you would know somewhat about me. I never thought i would have to actually write a note on her page, My parents got a phone call from a hospital in Cape Town.
Not sure if she mentioned about going to Johannesburg with her roommate. I forget her name. For the weekend, The girls were beaten and lets not get into details. But their bodies were sent back to Cape town, Aithley and her friend were in coma. They were in life supports, They were doing some tests on the girls to see if it was worthwhile to keep them on life support, Aithley condition she was brain dead and showed no life, so they took her off the machine, and my poor baby sister gone just like that. The room mate still has a chance she showed some life, so there is still some hope for her. Aithley body is planned to be shipped to England tomorrow evening.
She was telling me how great it was working in South Africa, alot better than other places, she has worked, She told me about how she fancied David. I never knew someone like her, she was one of those people that was a light in my meaning, she never had any enemies, there were those who judged her on the outside, but she didn't care she made easily friends, and i see even the time she has been on this site, she has made a ton of friends too. That was my sister, she had a big heart, and now she is taken away from me, She was so happy to be a bridesmaid at my wedding, now she gets no chance, no chance of actual love, or to build a family of her own. My kids would never know how special their aunt was, this news has come to us such a shock, we just don't know how to deal with it, tomorrow when viewing her i believe it will hit us really hard.
Aithley Anne Riley C.
29th September 1987 - 27th November 2012
Survived by her parents , brother (and sister in law), and friends.
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Not sure what is wrong with it, not sure if i can even post this blog, but i will try, i tried posting my daily blog up a few times but no success, so i have to write today's daily blog tomorrow then. And update things tomorrow, before i head out with Anja to Johannesburg.
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Today i seemed to have more energy than i have been, wonder what had caused me to be so tired in the past week, will see with my blood tests, not sure when they come, it may take 3 weeks, which will just be a week before i go home. Hopefully it comes sooner.
I played soccer today, lol, i have no idea how long ago it was that i played it, there were some young children playing outside the clinic, Anja and I joined in, aswell as David, who is another employee that works there, he is one of the doctors at the hospital. He is quiet handsome, 32 and divorced. Has no children. He too is from England, but has been living here in South Africa for 6 years. He is quiet a charm lol, He is great with kids, maybe i could say i have a small crush on him but i won't let it develop into anything, as i know his plans to stay here for another few years as my home is in England despite how much i enjoy it abroad working. Besides i go home in a month, i don't think i could handle a long distance relationship with having such a short term companionship and i may not return so even if he did have same feelings back i shouldn't start on it. I can just wonder for time being. Lol.
I also danced some, wow can the ladies move their hips, they shake and shake it like there is no tomorrow, all sizes and shapes, and they don't need no Shakira here lol. Their hips do not lie lol. The young ones are really fanatic about their dancing too. They do dance alot better than some of the dance crews out there.
I spoke with Adrian and Krystle on chat. It always nice to have communications like that for people far away. I be glad to see them again. I miss them so much. As well as my parents, They are thinking of having an April or May wedding, which would be nice weather at time in York. They are thinking it in 2014, so a whole year and a bit to plan for it and i get to be a bridesmaid, woohoo, what a thrill. Her maid of honor is her sister Valencia, And the other 2 bridesmaid is her half sister Sadie and her cousin Cheryl, so i am thrilled i get to be one of the bridesmaid too. I guess its because Krystle is already part of the family and we are pretty close too since she has been with my brother for 20 years or so. Krystle has no brothers though. Just Valencia and Sadie. Krystle is the eldest just like my brother. They are truly a perfect couple in my meaning. And i am so great that i get to share this wonderful experience with them.
Mother can not wait to be a grandmother, lol she is expecting one soon after they get married, i don't blame her as Andy is already 30 years old and i am 25. And she approaching 60 i can see her point lol. And all her friends are grandmothers whilst she is still on the waiting list lol, i see how her friends are very proud of their grandchildren and my mother just wants that feeling too. I guess she is afraid of dying young as her mother was not that old when she died. I believe she was only 62. I was a approaching teen when she died.
I guess tomorrow for USA it is thanksgiving day, Happy Thanksgiving day to you then, I have always celebrated it on a set date each year on the 25th, but being away from family and a different country i will not be celebrating it. But i have wished my family a happy thanksgiving and i gave them a list of my thankfulness in case dad wants to read a part from me so it feels like i am there with them.
I notice days i have more energy i seem to write more in my blog lol. I guess that is a good things as i always have something to say lol.
9 days left and November 2012 will be gone. And begin the last days of the last month for the year, scary thought, who swallowed the year up, 2010 didn't seem to go as fast as this year went or did it but just forgotten? lol. I am top of things with my goals. Two more days i can write a week blog about how i have been going with my goals. As well as weigh in day. So we shall see, i am hoping for some loss on the scale, since last week was no loss on scale but i did manage to loose 8cm / 3 inches. Mainly from my waist.
Yep yep yep! Still focused on my plans and why wouldn't i be, i am not giving up yet lol. I will continue this until the day i die lol. Since even when i am goal weight i will still be focused on toning myself and maybe loosing a few more, since the goal weight i picked is on the higher end of my healthy BMI so i will see on that goal weight what i want to do with my body then, although that is still a few years away, but i will get there!
Africa by Toto
With alot of singing and dancing in the evening, i thought this would be a great song that people know off would go with the theme. It is an awesome song about Africa.
“Don’t wait for someone to take you under their wing. Find a good wing and climb up underneath it.” ~Frank C. Bucaro
This is a great quote especially for those who struggle with support, i have crept under many wings of people here on sparkpeople and they have been welcoming too lol. I love my spark friends that i have here, so motivating they can be, and when i have a down day they give me a kick and shove and pull my face (well not literally but it feels like it lol) to make me smile and get back on track again, i love it. Thank you for all your support sparkpeople!
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