Friday, May 03, 2013
I don't understand why you continue to do this to me, or why I let you. You know I deserve better, am worth more and quite frankly I am sick of all of your excuses. I know what I am capable of, I know where I was a few short years ago. I am done letting you win! We argue everyday and I'm done arguing with you. I have allowed you to beat me down, talk me out of things and convince me that having the body and mind I want isn't possible. Well guess what...you are wrong SELF. I can achieve what I want to achieve! It may take time, longer than I want since I'm being honest, but it CAN be done.
I've run 5ks, 10ks and even a half marathon. I completed some small mud runs and even the Tough Mudder! Who are you to tell me I can't?!?! It is time to start living my life the way I want to live my life! Happy, healthy and full of love!
I may have allowed you to push me back to the bottom, but I'm ready to make that long climb back to the top. It may be a harder battle at 43 than it was at 37 but I have knowledge on my side. I have the knowledge of what it takes, but more importantly I have the knowledge that I CAN do it. I know I can do it because I've done it before.
So self, if I were you I would stop fighting me and join me. It will make things much easier on both of us, and we will both be better off in the long run.
If you don't want to come on this journey than I will have to say goodbye to you and create a new self! It's up to you!
Thursday, April 12, 2012
After having a heart to heart with my husband, and admitting that I have felt very depressed the last few months, I finally took action....at least with my excercise. Maybe that's what I needed, but I feel 100% better.
It's not knowing what needs to be done but getting out and doing it! My muscles are retaliating some from a month plus of limited excercise but my soul is saying thank you!
The next step is to get my eating back under control and remain consistent with my excercise.....mad at myself for letting myself get back HERE but know I can get back to where I want to be!
Friday, March 30, 2012
After completing the Tough Mudder on December 3rd and my first half maraton on January 8th (trail run....tougher than the tough mudder!) I can't seem to pull myself together. I have gained pretty much all my weight back but worse than that I feel horrible. I have had some things going on in my life but in reality nothing that should be holding me back from doing what I need to do. My nutrition has been horrid and my exercise as bad! I'm tired all the time, I'm going to bed late, I'm not planning my meals and probably the worst of all is I'm just not exercising. Unfortunately for me I am more motivated to work out if I have someone to workout with, one of my kids is at practice, or a class that I love. Last year at this time I had all three. Unfortunately instead of dropping my daughter off at practice and running I'm coaching, the class that I loved was cancelled and my workout partners are all on different schedules. So, with that being said I know that I have to motivate myself and "Just Do It!" The thing is I know how I feel now, and I know how I feel when I'm eating healthy and excersicing. Grrrr! Along with that the way I'm feeling is really pouring into the rest of my life. My house is a disaster that I can't seem to get under control, I'm cranky and my kids get the brunt of it, my dog hasn't been walked, laundry and bills are piling up, have gone from having 4-5 sit down meals with my family to a week to maybe 1 or 2.
I've given up even making excuses anymore, just not doing what I need to! Time to stop right now and get back on track!!
Goals for next week:
1) plan meals, make grocery list
2) Run 3 miles at least one time next week
3) Bike 2-3 times
4) drink 6-8 bottles of water
5) head to the beach at least once for mental health! :)
I put it out there....time for me to follow through!
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Yesterday I completed my first Warrior Dash! What a blast! I have to admit I was a bit nervous because I had been off the exercise wagon and not in as good of shape as I would like. After a 2 hour drive through small towns and lots of two lane roads Lucy (my GPS) and I finally arrived. I sat in the parking lot watching warriors come and go as I waited for my friend. They were muddy if nothing else!! I talked to two warriors to try to get some info on the obstacles. They told me not to worry, they weren't bad at all and to just have fun! After that I relaxed a little.
I found my friend and her group and we headed in to packet pick-up! The band was playing and so many participants were in costume...it was a great atmosphere!
After we set up, got our chips and bibs on, used the port-a-potty, etc it was almost time for our wave to begin so we headed to the start line. On your mark, get set, go! Off we went....my friend who I hadn't seen in a couple of years wanted to stay together (luckily I convinced her NOT to wait for the rest of the group!) so we walked some and jogged some....she's "not a runner!" but she kicked my but over the obstacles! Lots of muddy/mucky water, under barbed wire-over the wall, run through the palmettos, over the cars and through the tires. So far not to bad....wait, what's this? This wasn't on the website....I have to balance across those beams up & down & up & down, please don't let me fall....whew! I did it! Why is everybody stopped up there...it must be hard! OMG! We have to crawl through there? How long is it? But it's dark....ok a little smelly too...but we made it. THAT'S the cargo net? I thought it was just climb up and over...how do we get across that? Not pretty, but another obstacle down! How much longer? IDK, we're past the half-way mark. More obstacles....just more water, we can handle this. We're almost there. OOOOOOO...there's the cargo net we have to go up and over, how the heck do I get up that?? Grab it high, ok, did it...now to get down....O $h!#!! Ya, I missed a rung on the way down and fell, luckily I caught myself before I cracked my head on the wooden bottom! Rope burns on my wrists, a small gash on my leg but nothing serious! Funniest part was watching my friend scream and try to run and catch me!! It's great to have good friends! Almost done..."you know we have to run to the finish, there's people watching!" I hope I don't trip and fall in the fire....really don't want 3rd degree burns! I hear my name....oh, they're taking a picture...jump high!! Last obstacle....let's dive head first! Ewwww....muddy water! Gritty teeth! Hey, my pony is stuck in the barbed wire! We made it! That was awesome!! Let's go get our free beer!
Overall great day, great experience....you'll always have the super competitive people....I guess you have to be to finish in 20 minutes....but mostly people there to have a good time, drink beer and eat turkey legs!
Ohhh.....and a little eye candy!
WE ARE WARRIORS!!!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Hours a day wasted....seriously! Between Facebook, Spark, downloading music, checking my emails, uploading pictures, perusing the internet...thank goodness I don't work....don't know how I could fit it all in.
OK, so part of me (a big part) wastes soooo much time on the computer because I'm avoiding other things that should be done. Right now I'm avoiding mopping my floors, probably the chore I hate most. I tell myself frequently that I'm only going to check "this" really quick or only "30 minutes"....I look at the clock and 2 hours has passed and I still haven't "checked" what I was going to to begin with!
I guess there are worse addictions to have....drugs, alcohol, gambling....but damn, I wonder how much I could get accomplished if I chose NOT to spend hours a day on the computer. Maybe someday, instead of the extra hours on the computer I'll add another workout to my day....anything but mopping floors I guess.
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