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WILDHONEYPIE1's Recent Blog Entries

Maybe not so urgent...

Sunday, May 06, 2012

I joined an amazing 100 days of Summer team and part of today's challenge is to blog about why it is so important to me to lose weight now. Why this is urgent. In truth what is working for me right now is my patience. Not feeling like everything has to be perfect right this minute. I lost 20 lbs and gained 25 more times than I can count. Each time part of why I gave up came down to things not happening fast enough. I'd worked so hard and only lost a pound, half a pound, or stayed the same so what was the point. I binged so I had ruined everything, I was never going to be able to do this. Now I can't understand my former mentality. I lose some, I stay some, I try not to gain some. But if I do gain, I look at what I need to improve upon because Spark has definitely proven to me that this program works. I focus on how good it feels to take care of myself, to feel healthy and strong. I keep trying to figure out what is different this time. Why haven't I given up or given in? I think it is because I've replaced urgency with patience instead.

emoticon We can do this.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUE_2U 5/7/2012 8:04AM

    Understanding your own impatience and being able to withstand that is a huge change, and a very healthy one. It seems that often we sabotage ourselves. I know I've done it often and I don't honestly understand why. I hope I can avoid doing that again, though.
As Meredith from the 100+Team said;
"Being fat is hard.
Losing weight is hard.
Maintaining weight is hard.
Choose your hard."

I think we'll choose the last two in order.
You're making a big change and making a new habit for yourself. Go for it.
Spark On! emoticon

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XRSIZE18 5/7/2012 2:24AM

    Great viewpoint! I think it's important for everyone to understand that each person has their own journey and knows what works best for them. It sounds like you've found that out about yourself - so good for you!

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WOUBBIE 5/7/2012 12:01AM

    You take it one decision at a time!

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CHEFMOM1199 5/6/2012 10:18PM

  Keep the focus! You are doing fantastic!

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STARRDANCER1 5/6/2012 9:10PM

    It's working! You look marvelous emoticon
What a different experience at the amusement park this year.
I believe in you.
Yo mama

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Where to start...

Sunday, April 29, 2012

I was reading a journal I started last summer, 7/4/11 to be exact. I weighed in at 212.6. We had taken the kids to an amusement park and I left feeling really embarrassed. Even though it was VERY hot, I wore longer pants and an elbow length shirt because I wasn't comfortable walking around in anything less. I was super embarrassed trying to squeeze onto some kiddie rides with my youngest and even wrote "its a good thing fat is squishy". I wanted to loose weight so I wouldn't feel that same way the next time we made the trip. But my last weigh in was 9/15/11 at 215.8 before my scale broke. And as of 12/30/11, my clothes were even tighter and my eating completely unhealthy. I had written all these great ideas down. I knew how to do this. But I couldn't find the motivation. Living longer, setting a healthier example, feeling personally better, wasn't doing it. I just wanted to avoid public humiliation. It didn't work for me.
I don't know what changed, but since 1/1/12 I have been consistently making healthier choices. Easter and my daughter's birthday came in the same weekend, and my eating was not within my calorie range, but it was tracked, and honestly. I've been good about tending my spark. I've reached out to old sparkfriends and added new. And somewhere along the way I found out I do want to live healthier because there is no guarantee of longer. I also noticed that when I stopped biting my finger nails, my youngest child stopped too. I have to own it now, my kids are influenced heavily by my habits both good and bad. That is motivation. I'm not so worried about what anyone else thinks. I'm sure this is aided by all the positive feed back I've been getting from people in my life, but it also comes from feeling better about myself and not feeling so fragile.
The thing that brought all this up is our planned trip to another amusement park, possibly this Friday if the weather is good. (shh, don't tell the kids they think they're all going to the dentist.) And I'm down to 184.5. A little past my halfway point and 28 lbs down from my last roller coaster ride.

Thank you all for sharing your journeys and mine. We will do this. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUE_2U 5/1/2012 9:49PM

    That is wonderful!
And inventive. "Hey, kids, don't forget your swim suit for the dentist's office... " Hehehe..
You really have rocked this. Spark on!

And thanks so much for the kind words on my blog.

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HDHAWK 5/1/2012 6:25PM

    Congratulations! Good progress!

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GIRANIMAL 5/1/2012 12:17PM

    When I first started working out, I didn't even own a pair of shorts -- not even ones for lounging around the house. So I know what you felt hiding underneath long pants and sleeves despite insanely hot weather.

But look at you now! I'll bet this year's amusement park trip will be a totally different experience. emoticon

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INFINITEJESS84 4/29/2012 9:18PM

    Condragularions! I am so glad for you. Your kids will be so thrilled for the treat. I hope everyone has a wonderful time.

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STARRDANCER1 4/29/2012 2:28PM

    What an honest post. I can relate. You are an inspiration. I'm still waiting to see what will actually "spark" me. I am making progress, but still very undisciplined.
Yo mama emoticon

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MAVERICK59 4/29/2012 2:06PM

    This was great to read!
Have fun at the 'dentist'!

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JSABRINA 4/29/2012 11:26AM

    I so empathize with your experiences! I too have been out in very hot weather in long clothes because I've been too embarrassed to show my body -- especially my arms. The tipping point for me came a few weeks ago when I couldn't close my jacket all the way, much less zip it! That's when I resolved that I would lose weight *now* rather than buy even bigger clothes.

You can do this! We can do it together!


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VALERIEMAHA 4/29/2012 11:06AM

    Such an inspiring story, dear heart! You.Are.DOING.IT!!! Slow and steady wins the race. Fun for the whole family, yeah.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BMW9295 4/29/2012 11:06AM

    Good for you..... keep up the great work. I am not sure what your exercise it like but I have just started the Official Spring Into Shape Bootcamp Challenge..... I am hoping to jumpstart myself.... hope to see you around. All the luck to you on your journey

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CHEFMOM1199 4/29/2012 11:01AM

  Awesome inspirational post! Thank you for sharing your journey.

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5.5 pounds away...

Saturday, March 31, 2012

...and I'll be to my half way point! Woo-Hoo! I've started anew in the blog department. Avoiding sugar did not work out well for me. I did give up, and wallow, and self pity, and gain some more weight, and topped out at about 220, and finally flipped a switch and decided I really can do this. I got serious about getting healthy New Years day of this year, and even though I woke up to really, really yummy smelling pancakes, I'm still going strong. Gluten has been a successful focal point for me and as a side effect, it cuts my sugar consumption drastically by default. I think this is working for me because I know people in real life this worked for, and because the health benefits of no gluten are so all or nothing so every time temptation comes my way, it's not just the thought of a "little cheat" but starting all over again. And honestly this has made me feel like I really do have willpower which I was beginning to believe I lacked completely. While I'm typing I do have to mention how truly awesome Sparkpeople has been. I am inspired, motivated, and encouraged daily by friends, family, and complete strangers on this sight. So emoticon everyone.

We can do this. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHEFMOM1199 5/6/2012 10:16AM

  Your blogs are an inspiration to me! Keep posting and sharing your journey. emoticon

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INFINITEJESS84 4/16/2012 4:13PM

    Nice work, keep it up!

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GIRANIMAL 4/12/2012 3:42PM

    Ah, yes, gluten and sugar both have been hard for me! Sugar by far the hardest...I am not totally clean anymore but far better than I used to be. Congrats on being so close to your halfway point! It's only a matter of time now. You've got this!

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STARRDANCER1 4/11/2012 5:40AM

    You are truly on your way. I see first hand how well this is working for you. You are truly an inspiration to yo mama!! emoticon

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VALERIEMAHA 3/31/2012 3:06PM

    You're On Your Way!!! And looks like you're back in Onederland, huh (30 down from 220?)! The gluten thang seems to be a key for you, good. I don't quite understand this: "because the health benefits of no gluten are so all or nothing so every time temptation comes my way, it's not just the thought of a 'little cheat' but starting all over again." Are you saying that if you eat just a little food with gluen it will undo all the benefits you've accrued? Hmmm...that doesn't sound right...please enlighten me!

Keep on keepin' on, my friend!

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MERETONI 3/31/2012 10:51AM

    emoticon emoticon Congrats!!

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