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Someone PLEASE make this craziness stop!

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Stress is just getting worse and worse. Work stress is at max. I was at work later than my normal shift, and would have stayed even later than I did if I hadn't promised my daughter I'd take her to the ball game. As it was, I sat at the park running priority lists in my head the whole time. I didn't even sit under the scoreboard like I normally do. We left the game before it was over, and missed a spetacular bottom of the 9th where our home team pulled off a win. When I was driving home, my stomach felt off. I got home and was completely sick. I chalked it up to ballpark food. Only I am not feeling better today. I feel even worse.

Everything feels 10x worse today at work. I am taking a few minutes to write this, when I probably shouldn't be. And to prove my point, I was just handed yet another high priority item, so I will be taking my migraine, chest pains and stomach pains and going back to work.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLEURRR 8/3/2011 11:28AM

    If you are having chest pain you might be having a heart attack, get yourself checked out!

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MISTERBALDY 8/2/2011 6:50PM

    Sorry to hear...

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ALASKALILLADY 8/2/2011 4:19PM

    So sorry to hear you are struggling. I am in the same boat you are for sure though!

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Someone PLEASE make this craziness stop!

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Stress is just getting worse and worse. Work stress is at max. I was at work later than my normal shift, and would have stayed even later than I did if I hadn't promised my daughter I'd take her to the ball game. As it was, I sat at the park running priority lists in my head the whole time. I didn't even sit under the scoreboard like I normally do. We left the game before it was over, and missed a spetacular bottom of the 9th where our home team pulled off a win. When I was driving home, my stomach felt off. I got home and was completely sick. I chalked it up to ballpark food. Only I am not feeling better today. I feel even worse.

Everything feels 10x worse today at work. I am taking a few minutes to write this, when I probably shouldn't be. And to prove my point, I was just handed yet another high priority item, so I will be taking my migraine, chest pains and stomach pains and going back to work.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WAYSOFGRACE 8/3/2011 11:39AM

    Thank you very much to both of you for your comments. I very much appreciate them. :-)

No heart attack...just anxiety. I went home, and played a mindless video game for a bit and felt much better before I had to go to bed. I also spoke with my nutritionist about better ways to cope this morning and she gave me some good ideas.

I am going on vacation in 2 days. I definitely will be using the time to de-stress!!!

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FLEURRR 8/3/2011 11:26AM

    If you are having chest pain you might be having a heart attack! Get checked out!

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CLAIRE_LEFT_SP 8/2/2011 6:07PM

    I'm so sorry stress is compromising your life right now. It's so hard to back away from the stress. A couple things have helped me along the way. Perhaps one of these ideas will help you, too.

In the middle of the chaos I remind myself: no one can make me feel a certain way - my reaction to situations is a choice I'm making - I'm doing this to myself. This reminder helps me drop my shoulders down from ear height to where they belong! That forces many of the upper chest/shoulder muscles to relax. Close your eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. Amazing how much tension will bleed off.

I don't like the using the phrase meditation because it conjures up pictures of monks 'ohm'ing. Instead, I consider it quiet time. I spent quite a bit of time with a clinical hypno-therapist in the past and I learned about breath exchange and body balance. That means to do correct breathing for relaxation you have to not only breathe out the stress but also breathe in the calm to keep yourself in balance. So, I say to myself 'breathe in calm (deep breath); breathe out tension (deep exhale)." As I breathe in, I imagine a peaceful lake and when I breathe out I imagine black tar flowing from my mouth. The next cycle is a bit slower, less deep breath and so on until your brain and body have slowed down. Some people swear by the 4 seconds breathing in, 4 seconds hold, 4 seconds breathe out to help regulate the speed.

Since I have to think my way through the process, my mind is too busy chattering about all the stressful stuff giving me a mental break.

I do this exercise before I even get out of bed. I think through my day's agenda then calm myself down before I get up and tackle it all. I do this periodically throughout the day as needed - but at least twice more. Sounds stupid; really helps.

Hope you get over this rough spot soon!


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Effects of Stress

Monday, August 01, 2011

People react differently to stress from each other. This is not something everyone realizes. Some people eat when they are stressed, some lash out, others put their noses to the grindstone. I have one of two reactions to extreme stress. I will either become a fixated cleaning machine, or I will get physically sick.

Last week was stressful. I have a job that can be quite busy in and of itself. Add to it the poor planning on the part of the people I support, and it can hit epidemic proportions in the tug of war over who is going to get priority. As of this writing, I have no less than 6 people all vying to be higher on the priority list (I'm blogging on my lunch break to catch a breather). I have stress at home. I have a 17 year old who has realized recently that I am not a taxi service for her and her friends. I have bills I need to pay, with no idea how I am going to get that accomplished. I have a friend who right now is angry with me for something I wrote that didn't come out the way I intended (I tend to think in one language, and type in English, which doesn't always come out well). I have a mountain of work, appointments to keep, places to go, packing to do (I'm going on vacation for a week on Friday), laundry to be caught up on, another daughter who needs stuff for college (she leaves at the end of the month), a car that was stuck in the mechanics for a week which slowed everything down, etc. You get the picture. BIG BALL OF STRESS. Normally I'd clean, probably lash out because of perceived lack of help (I'm not completely rational under stress), and just whip it all into shape. Not this time.

This time I got sick. I got REAL sick. Asthma due to stress is a hazard for me, despite the medications I take. I got laid out for 2 full days, which put me behind at work and at home. I fulfilled obligations this past weekend that I had made, though one of those obligations (a bbq at a friend's house) saw me physically there, and sleeping on someone's couch. I am not processing my carbs properly, and it's resulting in me needing to sleep alot more than usual. One hotdog at the bbq yesterday, and I slept for 1.5 hours after it! Not happy making.

I have too many things and too many people tugging at my available time. I keep hearing things like "if you cared you'd make time to...(insert exercise, talk to me, cook a meal)". That just adds to my stress levels. I really need to get away on this vacation before I put myself in a hospital. Everything I worked so hard for the past two months is disintegrating right before my eyes.

I am only one person. A human being with thoughts, and feelings, and limits to how much she can do or take. Right now, I need a vacation to get back on track, which strikes me funny as most people need to get back on track AFTER a vacation. Guess I'm just backwards emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IOEINC 8/1/2011 4:20PM

    I feel for you. I was stressed today (although no where near the amount of stress you are under) and it really affected my blood glucose. At 2PM I was at 120 and that was before lunch and I am never that high at that time of day. Just keep remembering that you are only one person and cannot do it all. I normally just ignore everything around me but tI wasn't able to do that today. And I wasn't even at work today!!. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
emoticon

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Who'd have thought that exercise was for me!

Thursday, July 28, 2011

I admit it. I hate exercise. Ok...I dont actually HATE it per se...more like I have a very hard time getting motivated. There's always an excuse. Well, I found a way to do some simple strength training while I am at work. Are you ready for this?

Seated leg extensions....I share an office, and I am always embarassed when people catch me doing these in my office. So one day while in the bathroom at work, I decided to try this one. Low and behold, it is so easy! I can do this!

Wall pushups....I admit this is one I used to do all the time. With my back/shoulder injury, I just can't do 12 in a row. I can do maybe 6 before my arm wants to fall off. So I have been doing 6, rest until my arm feels a bit better, then do 6 more. It may take me longer, and it may not be all the benefit of doing them all at once, but hey, I'm moving!

Lunges....I do these in the morning to get the blood pumping. It helps wake me up, I also like that I feel more energetic when I do them early.

Calf raises....I do these alot actually. I will get up from my desk at work and do a couple of sets just to stretch. Feels good on the legs...and again, I am moving.

4 simple exercises that I CAN do, WANT to do, and here I am more motivated than ever to find other ones that don't require special equipment, a gym membership or tons of room.

Look at me! I'm exercising! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AFTERMYKIDS 7/29/2011 7:59PM

    emoticon Look at you go!! That's emoticon

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Agree to disagree

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

There is something I have told my children since they were small, and have lived by my entire life. Agree to disagree, but do not let it color how you view a person. This advice has seen them through bullies, friendship fallouts, boyfriend breakups and even well intentioned relatives.

Agree to disagree came about in our house when my oldest daughter was being bullied in school. She was bullied from kindergarten all the way through high school graduation. In elementary school it was because she got straight A's and was friendly to everyone. In middle school it was because she was the "new" kid (we had moved to a new town) and because she had gained weight. In high school it was because she was teaching herself to read and speak Japanese, and because she enjoyed manga (a style of cartoon drawing and storytelling from Japan that I don't fully understand myself). She always greeted everyone with a smile though, even her worst critics. She detests conflict of any type. It's not her style. She's a wonderful young woman of 21 now, and one I am very proud of.

My youngest daughter has always taken the "this is who I am, take it or leave it" approach to everything. Her idea of agreeing to disagree is to listen to what you say, tell you she disagrees, then walk away from any further argument. If you persist, she'll just block you out of her life. She has no time for conflict (even if drama seems to follow her around like a puppy dog). I am also very proud of her for her sense of self. I taught my daughters the same lesson, and they made it very much their own.

But somewhere along the way, agreeing to disagree made them very self concious. My oldest daughter doesn't like to eat in front of people. She told me she feels like she is being stared at and that people are thinking "Look at that fat pig shovelling more food into her mouth" if she even LOOKS at food. My youngest daughter has a beautiful singing voice and has had several solos in her high school choir, yet she won't sing in front of her family because she feels like she isn't good enough.

One thing I have been determined to do with my girls is to encourage them in all their endeavors. I support them, help them, advise them when they ask, and the only criticism they hear from me is always followed by pointing out all the good parts to it. So why are they so embarassed by who they are?

Has the need for people and the media to tell us what is wrong with us created a generation that cannot be comfortable in their own skins?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BUSYGRANNY5 7/27/2011 9:45AM

    I agree with the concept, "Agree to disagree" and found your blog to be very thought provoking! Thanks so much for sharing!



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MISTERBALDY 7/27/2011 9:24AM

    Words can be a powerful weapon, but can be a powerful healer as well. It just depends on which you wish to let have an effect on you. That is at least a start in the right direction. Also, remember... if you cannot accept the positives in your life from others, you can't expect others to accept your positives from you. You must be able ro recieve it, in order to give it as well.

It's just the nature of who we are... emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/28/2011 11:26:02 AM

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