Monday, January 11, 2010
This is a message that I sent to our Biggest Loser Challenge members at the end of our first week. I wanted to share it.
Hi Challenge Members!
I want to thank each and everyone of you who chose to participate in this challenge and who checked in this week whether you lost, gained or held the same. The fact is, this challenge is all about YOU! This is nothing more than a way to motivate us all toward our goals. There is nothing you can do that will turn anyone here against you. You will not be shunned for gaining weight or staying the same. You will only be supported and cared for.
Those of us who have stayed around here long enough to experience the ups and downs that come with real life have learned that it is the CONNECTION to others that makes a real difference in this program. We have been successful here and have been able to pick ourselves back up when we have had setbacks because we have stayed CONNECTED. Most of us with weight issues have developed a habit of pulling away when we aren't doing well with food. We feel shame and sadness and fear that we won't be able to succeed. We want to hide and cover our wounds with food.
Staying connected helps us to remain honest with ourselves, which is where we truly need honesty. It is difficult to deceive ourselves about how we look or how we are progressing when we are out in the open sharing our real selves with others. When we pull back, we are hiding, not only from others, but from ourselves. When we do that, we only really come face-to-face with our true selves when we have to shop for new clothes or get on the scales at the doctor's office or go to an event with old friends. Then we find the truth staring boldly at us, and it hurts. Pulling back, usually means falling back into old ways and the self-deception that comes with it.
It is okay to be yourself here, whatever that may be. Not one of us is perfect, and we are in this together.
Congratulations to all of you! Just being here --------- showing up makes you a winner!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
I have been totally motivated again since the day after Christmas. The motivation wasn't just "there", I had to fake it until it came. I knew that I had gained weight since November because my clothes didn't fit properly, but I didn't get on the scales right away. I was afraid that the number I would see there would deflate my already shaky determination. So on 12-26 I simply made up my mind that I would not behave as I had in the past. I would not ignore the signs that were evident in my clothing and in my body and allow my weight to continue to creep up.
Instead, I grabbed onto what I have learned over the past 21 months here at SP. I KNEW that when I ate good, healthy food that I felt better, both physically and emotionally. I KNEW that when I exercised I felt better, both physically and emotionally. I KNEW that if I made myself do these things for several days, the following days would pretty much take care of themselves. I knew I would feel great and my newer, healthier habits would take over and win!
So I did it. Surrounded by the dregs of Christmas and faced with a New Year and its celebrations just around the corner, I said "ENOUGH". I ignored the remaining cookies and sweet rolls, the holiday spirits in the cupboard and the Christmas dinner leftovers and I picked up those wonderful, healthy foods that I have grown to savor, and, instead of feeling deprived, I felt nourished, both physically and emotionally.
I am back on my journey of health and fitness. I don't know how much I had gained because I didn't weigh myself right away. When I finally got on the scales last week, I was up 6.6 pounds from my lowest weight. Today I am down two more pounds. Soon I will be right back to my previous weight and then the number will be even lower because, instead of resigning myself to failure when I slipped off my path, I remembered how far I had already come and refused to go backward any farther.
I remember what it felt like to weigh 295 pounds and what I did to get there. Now, I can also remember what it feels like to eat well and move my body and feel good about my appearance. The choice between the two is a simple one, and I get to choose!
Saturday, January 02, 2010
I think that one of the critical things we can do this year is to stay INVOLVED! I think I speak for us all when I say that we tend to slip away from this site when we are feeling badly about our ourselves and/or are behaving badly to our bodies. We become embarrassed and pull away at exactly the time when we most NEED to be connected. That is when our "slip" becomes a fall. We have to change our ways if we want to change our bodies.
Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. Let's stop the insanity now!
Friday, January 01, 2010
2010 is here, and I enter it eager to see what it will hold. I realize that I hold power over what happens, but I am not omnipotent. What I hope for and plan to work toward are these things:
I want to reach my stated goal weight in this year.
I want to seek treatment for the lymphodema in my legs, now that it has been diagnosed.
I want to move to a new home that has less land and requires less of my time to care for.
I want to become more comfortable and competent with homeschooling my daughter (a new endeavor that began in October, '09).
I want to schedule an appointment with the trainer at my gym and get some help with a strength training plan.
I want to increase the intensity of my cardio workouts.
I want to become more organized in my the juggling of my many jobs - employer/homeschool teacher/ homemaker - I frequently feel stressed and that things are out of control.
Monday, December 28, 2009
The last couple of months have been tough with so many big things happening. I wasn't great throughout the Christmas holiday, but it was a far cry from my eating in the past. I indulged and I have definitely gained several pounds, but I didn't "pig out". I no longer eat mindlessly or to uncomfortable excess.
Another big difference was that the day after Christmas, with many sweets still in the house, I went back to my program of healthy eating within my calorie range and got back on the treadmill. I did not beat myself up about my behavior or the extra pounds. I have not even gotten on the scale. I don't need to see the pounds, I know they are there. My clothes tell the story. I fear that the actual number will just be a way of rubbing my nose in it. Instead, I just picked myself up, dusted myself off and started again.
Here's to a healthy, successful 2010!
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