Saturday, April 07, 2012
I visited Austin Texas in 2009 --- home of the marvellous IMAGINE_IT! We didn't meet up at that time . . . but have to say, I did fall in love with Austin's amazing cowboy boots which you see everywhere on everyone. And: have wanted a pair ever since. In bright red.
I've been haunting ebay and local thrift shops and . . . nothing.
But yesterday, found some pretty amazing and inexpensive (and on sale) leather cowgirl boots in bright red on the internet with great reviews (for the most part). And ordered a pair just because -- I'm 61 today. If not now, when?? Here's hoping that they arrive soon and are as cute as they look.
Red not your thing? Orange, lime green. purple, white, turquoise, pale pink? And (if you search the site) you'll see that slate blue and hot pink are also possibilities!!
"One silly thing a day" is always my motto: and I'm thinking that I wouldn't wear these WITH my red leather jacket and my black cowboy belt with the red appliqué stars for work: just one of those things at a time. But on a weekend . . . yeah, maybe all of the above, once in awhile!!
Friday, April 06, 2012
An article in today's Toronto Star presents new research indicating that children aged 2-6 are already biased against fat children and assume that they are "mean".
This weight prejudice is apparently linked to the "fatertainment" trend which presents fat children and adults as unintelligent, unpopular and lazy.
Maybe little kids pick up this attitude from their parents. Because apparently people who watch reality shows like Biggest Loser become more prejudiced against fat people after they watch the show than they were beforehand.
It's OK to be prejudiced against the obese because it's something they could deal with by exerting a little willpower. Right? We all know how easy weight loss and weight-loss maintenance really are!!
Not surprising that overweight kids and adults are much more likely to experience depression, anxiety and low self-esteem.
Wednesday, April 04, 2012
The Ontario government has come up with a life expectancy quiz that helps figure out the effects of lifestyle on longevity. Here it is:
Basically, we are told that there are five behaviour risks that shorten life: smoking, poor diet, excess alcohol, inactivity and stress. And that if each of us was in the healthiest category for each of these high risk behaviours, we'd add 7.5 years of life expectancy!
Even if we just changed our most detrimental health risk behaviour, life expectancy would increase by up to 3.7 years.
Interesting!! In Ontario, we have socialized medicine. So bad health behaviours affect medical costs for everyone.
I'm thinking maybe some financial incentives would help: tax rebate if you have a healthy BMI, for example??
I'm gonna live to be 90!! Think I'll still be wearing my high heeled black leather over-the-knee boots and black leather pencil skirt, size 6?? Ummmm, maybe not!
Saturday, March 31, 2012
There's tons of research out there -- just google -- indicating that men have a huge advantage in the workplace if they are tall. Presidents of countries, leaders in law and medicine and business and finance: it clearly can't be coincidence that so many of these guys are tall. And we can all carry ourselves proud, stand tall, as tall as possible. Women can even wear heels!. But everyone understands that you can't actually make yourself taller through your own choice or your will power. So there doesn't seem to be a problem with overt workplace discrimination against shorter people.
What about fat people? There's also lots of research in both the US and Canada on "fat discrimination" in the workplace. I sometimes think it's the last kind of in-your-face discrimination still right out there.
Of course it's absolutely not politically correct to discriminate against people on the grounds of gender, sexual orientation, race, national origin. And it shouldn't be. Those kinds of discrimination may still occur but just about nobody finds any of it acceptable. People -- lots of them -- speak right up. Or shun those who are mean to minorities. There's been real social progress, and not before it was time. In part because we know that none of these qualities is a choice.
But there hasn'be been nearly as much progress towards acceptance if you're fat. Discrimination in the workplace against fat people still seems to be (pardon this bad pun, please) pretty widespread!
That's because if you're fat it's your fault, says Steve Siebold. And much as I'm a "fatloser" fan (fatloser.com is Steve Siebold's terrific free online mental toughness program on weight loss) I do think that his "it's your fault" message is pretty harsh. And not helpful.
To make it even worse, in the popular perception "fat" attract a big cluster of other negative associations. If you're fat, you're lazy, lacking self-respect, lacking self discipline, slow-moving . . . and a whole lotta other non-flattering adjectives.
And in the popular perception, remember, fat is your choice. So if a fat person is choosing to be fat, that would make it OK to treat a fat person with something less than respect. In the workplace as well as socially.
Well, I don't think so. Fat discrimination based upon "fault" is contrary to all of the research about how hard it really is to lose weight , and how hard it really is to maintain weight loss, and how multifaceted the causes of weight gain are. Yet justification of fat discrimination is one great big fat presumption which still seems to be alive and well out there. The result? People can be mean to fat people with impunity. All of that "person of size" and "fat acceptance" stuff to the contrary, fat doesn't seem to be working well at work.
Fat doesn't work to advance careers in business and the professions. And it doesn't help much in more personal relationships either.
A fat politician? It used to be OK -- think Winston Churchill. But: not any more. They're all running for office --literally and figuratively. All the time. Those of you familiar with Toronto Mayor Rob Ford's very public battle to lose weight will be well aware of what a target he is for excessive and bloated disdain and contempt -- well beyond any legitimate or reasoned criticism of his municipal policies.
A fat CEO? Think thirties movies: fat business guys with cigars also used to be OK -- but now not so much. Corpulent and corporate don't mix. We're a lean and mean economy, needing nimble and quick role models. Steve Jobs was not a fat guy. Not at all.
A fat doctor? Nooooooooo. Bad enough being a fat nurse, even a fat ward clerk (yup, that would have been me for about three years while a young student). Fat in a hospital setting: sure it's there, just like everywhere else in society. But fat is not healthy. So fat is not acceptable anywhere in health care . . . not at all.
A fat lawyer? I was. Not a good look. Lawyers are supposed to be rational, logical, applying the law and precedent, controlled. Fat means out of control. Fat is not helpful in the courtroom. Even if you're hiding under the robes we Canadian lawyers do get to wear here!
A fat teacher? As a role model for children, given the international obesity crisis? I was a slim and fit college teacher . . . . and then fatter . . . and then less fat again. My weight fluctuation really had an effect on young adults' respect for me. I'm betting (based in part on what my own kids said about fat teachers in public school and high school) that being a fat teacher at those grade levels is even tougher. Huge huge pressure to be hip and happening.
A fat waitress? I've waited tables . . . and the tips are way better (weigh better) when you're looking good. In part because then you're perceived to be really hustling with the burger and fries and Coke ("Yeah, I'll have the extra large, thanks. What kinda pie ya got for dessert??").
Fat in retail? Where it's all about looking good in the clothes that are for sale? Ummmm. Tough one. I can't recall I've very often seen a heavy clerk in a high-end or high-fashion clothing store: and I'm betting that's not a coincidence either.
A fat parent? The most important job most of us will ever have. There are lots of fat mothers and fathers: it's an occupational hazard. No sleep, cleaning the scraps off our kids' plates, unable to schedule time for the gym or any time for ourselves. The fat mother is not the one featured in all the stories about the hot young "yummy mummy" thing, though. Uh uh.
I've been a fat mother and yeah, I wanted to stop sending the message that fat was OK to my own kids. They watched me struggle with various diets, peeling it off and putting it back on. They didn't believe me when I said over a decade ago that I was done being fat. But that time I did take it off for good. My kids did see my final battle and they do see the ongoing effort it takes for me to sustain weight loss. I'm thinking that they respected it. I'm sure DH did -- and does -- and that he appreciates it too. "Fat discrimination" at home? Didn't feel that myself, but I'm absolutely sure (in the context of divorce law) that many fat parents/husbands/wives do.
Is any of this fair? Absolutely not, of course not. It's offensive at so many different levels, it's hard to know where to begin.
But is it reality? It seems to be.
So: how do we deal with it?
I'm increasingly fascinated by this whole phenomenon of "fat at work" and I've been thinking about it lots. So I'd love to hear about your experiences being fat and maybe becoming less fat, in the various jobs all of us do.
If you're interested in sharing your experiences here, you could just cut and paste the section of this blog between the emoticons and answer whatever questions interest you. . . . and of course add any other comments that you like.
Lots of us are wrassling with these issues and I'm pretty sure we would love to collaborate on our responses and strategies!!
What do you do to earn a living?
Have you experienced discrimination related to size at work?
Did you speak up and confront it?
Or did it just make you miserable? Miserable enough to leave the job?
Do your co-workers help you with your weight loss efforts? Or sabotage you? Deliberately? Or just without thinking?
What could co-workers do to support you in your weight loss?
When you lost weight, did you get new thinner-person "creds" not really related to any change in your actual workplace performance?
And does that make you feel like an impostor?
Or help sustain your motivation to keep the weight off?
And what about fat discrimination in the really important workplace: as parent? As spouse?
Sunday, March 25, 2012
We don't use the word "diet" here at Spark People much. Not a word I like much either. But I do use it, myself. And I've recently blogged on the topic.
For me it's always going to be necessary to diet. Permanently.
And it's going to be necessary to tolerate -- even savour -- being hungry. Every day. Human beings are meant to experience hunger. Thin people do experience hunger. Because hunger signals that I'm ready for my next meal. And hunger signals that I will enjoy that meal even more.
However, in that context, I've been thinking about commercial "diet food". The whole focus of diet food and diet cooking is on eliminating hunger. It's a billion dollar industry. And hunger cannot be eliminated if weight is to be lost and cannot be eliminated if weight loss is to be maintained. It's a delusion.
Those 100 calorie pouches, the special cookies that are calorie reduced, the baked instead of fried chips. I don't buy that stuff. In my experience when I did, I just ate more of the calorie reduced foods until I'd had six reduced-calorie cookies instead of two regular cookies, amounting to the same number of calories, or maybe more. Self-delusion. Although (never wishing to be boringly consistent about anything) I do use sugar substitute moderately, Splenda being my favourite.
And I've been thinking about diet recipes too. There is a big focus here at Spark People and in a million cookbooks and magazine articles on lower-calorie versions of favourite foods with the promise that they are "just as good" or even better, more flavourful. The calorie reduced cheesecakes made with low fat cream cheese and sour cream, the fudge brownies with applesauce instead of butter, the ovenbaked "fried chicken". And yup, I've contributed a few of those recipes too. None of them do taste quite as good as the original. Because they don't appeal to all of the senses -- the mouthfeel of fat, the crispiness of fat, the crunchy sound of caramelized sugar, the smell of butter-soaked popcorn. So maybe if I had a slightly bigger portion of the cheesecake it'd be good? No? Delusion again. I've had to come to the conclusion that cheesecake is not for me. Fried chicken is not for me either.
With the way I'm eating now, increasingly I don't use recipes. As for the requests for my "soup recipes": I would love to help and I'm flattered to be asked but I don't really have any. My soup is comprised from whatever's in the cupboard and the freezer and those veggies in the fridge that need to be used up from last week's salads.
But what I'm learning is that out-and-out "diet foods" -- commercial product, or my own "makeover" versions -- are seldom satisfying. Although I 'm not totally consistent, primarily and increasingly I'm finding that my omelettes and oatmeal and soups and my salads (staples of my diet) are tending to be "real food". By which I mean, not commercially calorie-reduced or revamped versions of higher fat originals.
Real oatmeal, old fashioned type: not the prefab pouches. Of course there aren't any calorie reduced radishes or tomatoes or bell peppers or arugula. All those raspberries and blueberries and apples are by definition "full calorie". I do often choose lower fat or fat free dairy products (yogourt, feta, milk) but I'll eat full fat old cheddar and full fat butter rather than processed cheese slices or ersatz margarines. I will eat full fat cashews or nut butters and avocado and salmon: all good fats. Provided I have them in controlled quantities. Very controlled. And not every day.
I can't have some of these real foods in sufficient quantities such that I'm not going to feel hungry. I do feel hungry. Every day.
Hunger is not an emergency. And no amount of "diet food" will prevent me from feeling hungry anyhow, if I am going to sustain my calorie range. And maintain my weight.
No amount of exercise will permit me to eat whatever I want either.
I am going to be hungry. I am going to savour my hunger, savour my meals. Real meals. Because real food is more satisfying to me.
Gotta grow up and accept this. No whining. No regrets.
Less is more.
Don't misunderstand: I'm not "lecturing" on this topic, not at all.
This is a new core belief I have deliberately adopted, and I'm repeating it here primarily for my own benefit. Repeating it until I believe it, act upon it and realize the results.
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