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Long Break

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Ok yeah, i've taken a long break. I think i may have needed it... to kick back for a (long) while and just let go for a while... do whatever and not have a schedule to keep to.

I don't feel so bad right now. It's almost new year, and i know that when new year comes, then i have some deadlines to start meeting, and some targets to work for and accomplish. That's what i look forward to.

My Honeymoon, March 25th, i will be at the very most, 145lbs. I have lots of new workout DVDs to get my butt into, AND, i am purchaing P90X, so i am so gonna be on my game. So roll on January, when reality comes back, i go back to work and i get back to doing ME! x

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAVEYSHADOW 12/30/2010 6:11AM

    emoticon yes I know what you mean about the need for a break. Glad to have you back and ready to kick a**!

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SWEETLIPS 12/29/2010 11:25AM

    Aw Yeah, just keep feeling good about you and you wull make your goals - Glad to see you back.

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FITJEANS 12/28/2010 3:05PM

    yeah i definitely understand some times breaks r needed in order to get where we r going. I feel like I have taken a bit of a break and, that is what lead me to where im at right now back motivated and ready to take on the new year and bring it in right.
Woo hoo , I know that you will have the most amazing honey moon and look magnificent. I am super excited for you.
I can see ya now on your honey moon emoticon emoticonlooking fabulous. Glad you r giving p90x a try. It is like having a personal trainer emoticon in your own ho emoticonme and ya dont have to worry about traveling to the emoticon emoticongym and, the hubby can try it as well.

So like I so cant wait to have ya back in january, because you mean buisiness when you set your mind to something. Have a great new years steph

Comment edited on: 12/28/2010 3:07:42 PM

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Lost Control

Friday, December 17, 2010

I am so red faced and embarrassed. And ashamed. And disgusted.


After that blog about having some timeout yet being 'totally in control'..... I lost it.

I'm angry too. 6 days now i have ate almost 3,000 calories per day. GRRRR!!! I didn't want to post this, but i HAVE to, to make it real. To make it reality and SHAME myself because i know how frickin stupid i have been!!!!

The thing that angers me more is that i DID think about what i was eating. I KNEW. And you know what? I laughed in my healthy/fit selfs face and said SO WHAT? And ate it anyway. And ate more of it. And then carried on, and made another bad decision after that, and so on.



I'm angry because i've broken my exercise streak too. I had it up to over 10 weeks... i can't remember exactly, but it was going good and strong. You know what? I contemplated FAKING some, so i wouldn't lose my streak.

I can't do that - how stupid is that? I would only be fooling myself, nobody else. It's like eating foods and hiding the wrappers - so what if somebody finds it, you're only fooling YOURSELF!!!! And also CHEATING yourself!!!!

I have healthy foods in for the weekend, so i plan to get back on board tomorrow, Saturday, NOT Monday. NOT THE EASY ROUTE of the new week. TOMORROW. Saturday. Healthy eating and exercise again. I need a damn good workout to put me in my place.

It's so sad at how really easy... so so easy it is once you veered off the track, to stay of the track... TOO damn easy. I got my strength. I got Sparkpeople. I got the PEOPLE on Sparkpeople, the SUPPORT.

=( I feel like i've fallen down a mountain where my belly is concerned. I felt i was getting somewhere and it might be toning up. Now? Now it is fat and flabby and bloated and horrible and feels like there's no hope.

I am ready to get back to it.


To end on a happy note... it's snowing. Ok it's not good that i have to be in work tomorrow morning with lots of responsibility, but why not make somebody laugh with my silly pics.

Me preparing to brave the snow...

And me mid snow-angel in my back garden.

Well my Mum had a laugh at them anyways =P

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JAZZYNUME 12/27/2010 2:16PM

    Hey lady!!!
I am sorry that you were having a rough time. I hope that you are back on track now. This is very hard this new journey of ours and there are going to be setbacks. I agree with SWEETLIPS. Take a Deep Breath and keep it moving!!!

Dont worry we got your back :)

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AVRENIM1 12/19/2010 8:48PM

    You are too cute and hard on yourself. So you messed up this week, so have we, one time or another. Some of us more then others. It's so good and important that you do what you just did. You shared your mistake and your plan to make it right. This is not the first time and it won't be the last. We just have to keep pulling together sharing our goals, accomplishments and yes, our mishaps. So keep up the woo hoos, and the oh ohs. Oh yes, and the pics that make us smile. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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EMBRACE_SUCCESS 12/18/2010 3:50PM

    I'm sorry to hear that you've been going through a tough time. You aren't alone--everyone goes through slumps. Admitting that things have been difficult is a great step in the process and it takes guts! I hope you had a great day today and were able to hit the reset button and forgive yourself for your mistakes. You've done an awesome job and I know that you can (and will) get back on track!

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WARMSPRINGDAY 12/18/2010 7:27AM

    Hey, you are not alone, walking this road with you. Really difficult right now. I did the same thing yesterday, posted on my status that I kept my hand out of the candy bag, then ate some late in the evening - sigh!

But you know what, honesty and accountability are absolutely keys to success, so you are on the right road.

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ELAOPET 12/18/2010 6:41AM

    Eh, 3000 calories days happen to everybody!
Don't beat yourself up, move on. Yes, drink that water.
I find it the hardest thing is to TRACK everything! EEEEEVERY-THINGGGGG! It's quite a job when you stuff yourself with load of crap!
I do it. Every bite.
I'm lucky so far, no gain. I go up and down with calories, and sometimes I even think this is good - keeps the body on it's toes because it never knows what to excpect! LOL (ok, maybe not funny)
You are very cute and brave - love the pics! You go girl!!!

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-POOKIE- 12/18/2010 3:08AM

    *laughs* I think your picture is adorable! We have snow today too, glad I have no where to go.

As for the food... *sighs* its a crazy thing that our heads KNOW whats meant to be going on, yet we still do things to the contrary, and not understand why.

Drink some extra water today to help shift that bloat, I had a horribly visible wobbly bloated belly last weekend after the baked goods nonsense from the german market, was horrible looking... like you say, its crazy what we do to ourselves.

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JESSIEJUICE 12/17/2010 11:51PM

    I looove your snowy pics! Making snow angels is hands down my favorite winter activity. Don't beat yourself up too much- you've already made yourself accountable and you have a plan to move forward. It is SO hard not to let a bad week snowball... I definitely understand. It's something I need to remind myself of everytime I think I can just have one of whatever tempting treat/cocktail is in front of me :). You can do it!!!!

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YESKATIECAN 12/17/2010 10:44PM

    Ok... Breathe in.. Breathe out... In again... and out.... LOL...You and I both cheated this week! Now we gotta get back on this! Let's give them awful (but delicious) foods the bird! We are sooo much better than all those calories!


Love the snow gear pics! Your hilarious!


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ONEDROP09 12/17/2010 10:27PM

    Yeah totally happens sometimes! You're human. Now forgive yourself and plan your meals for the weekend...in advance. Get some type of exercise in this weekend. Drink that water girl! That will surely help reduce that bloated feeling. December is probably the most challenging month of the year. That's awesome that your committed to Saturday instead of waiting until Monday to get back on track. Doesn't have to be a perfect day each day but just doing something is a sure way to get your groove back! emoticon

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SWEETLIPS 12/17/2010 10:07PM

    BREATHE!!!, NOW MOVE ON!!!!! We all been in a place and done somethings. So, I will hold you arms up, as you get your footing and back where you feel you need to be! Much love!

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Some Unplanned Timeout

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I don't think I'm hurting my efforts too much.

I felt really crap today. I bumped up some mega fitness minutes on Saturday, ice skating, walking and dancing, and i need to remind myself of that because i feel like i've had 4 whole days off from exercise. Truth is it's only the third day today. I just have to make sure i don't go getting wussy and tired and back out tomorrow.

I won't.

I had a meal out Saturday night. I had a McDonalds for lunch on Sunday. I had a (well choiced) meal out Monday night.

And no exercise since Saturday night. So that's what's made me feel crappy and bloated. It fascinates me how our brain and feelings react to different things. I felt great last week and really felt myself toning up. Today i felt fat and flabby. My weigh in tonight (a day late) was very good news though, considering the little bits of bad eating. I lost half a pound!

I realised i did work hard last week. So tonight is the last one before that hard work begins, i'm having a takeout Chinese banquet. I don't feel too bad about it after my weigh in though. In fact - I'm cool, because i know what i'm doing.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JESSIEJUICE 12/15/2010 1:20PM

    Congrats on the loss! It sounds like you're really good at balancing life/exercise/food.

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AVRENIM1 12/14/2010 11:52PM

    You got it girl! emoticonStay cool!

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EMBRACE_SUCCESS 12/14/2010 10:34PM

    Every once in awhile I find the unplanned break to be really helpful. It can be a great reminder of why we work out and eat in a healthy manner:) Have a great day tomorrow and I hope you enjoyed your takeout.

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FITJEANS 12/14/2010 2:31PM

    Yes ne weight loss is better then no weight loss, but a gain can sometimes be devastating to the mind and that you didnt do. Yeah i have moments like those believe it or not ,i had one of those moments somtime last week. Yeah we can sometimes be hard on ourselvs there r pros and cons to that and you mostcertainly hav found your balance. Love that you dont dwell in the past , you move on and put your best foot forward.
Now lets do this chica, lets take this week by storm and challenge our selves.

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-POOKIE- 12/14/2010 1:58PM

    Its weird isn't it, even if my exercise is only a walk, I feel awful if I miss it, feel lazy and slow.

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JANET014 12/14/2010 1:56PM

  i get lots of fat days an they feel pretty yucky enjoy yourself tonight an get back in the zone tomorrow emoticon

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Another "No"

Friday, December 10, 2010

Just to check in.

My week has gone well. I lost just over a pound on Monday's weigh in - yay!

I worked out for my 4th time in the week today. AND i said no to takeaway food for the second Friday on the run. I'm having a glass of wine tonight but i'm still much in my nutritional goals. (I ate a light choice meal, beef enchiladas & salad - tasty!)

I'm feeling very positive. And kind of patient. I want my abs work to just show on my belly. I know deep down that it will, so i am just holding my breath and knowing i need to be patient. So i'm soldiering on. I do feel i need to push myself harder though.

Taking my niece ice skating tomorrow - another workout for the week ha! Very excited!

Also, i must add, i don't think i'd be here so religiously without my fabulous Sparkfriends helping me along the way... the love and support i receive every day... it's keeping me in line. People don't realise how much one little blog comment, one little "like", one little status comment, one little Sparkpage drop by... means so so much to me.... i can't express it the way i would like to, but if you're still reading at this point, then YOU my dear Sparkfriend (You people know who you are!), thank you SO so much, you fill my heart with the SPARK to carry on and help more than i could ever explain!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITJEANS 12/13/2010 9:27AM

    Awwwww I definiteyly feel the same way about ya. You kept me motivated from the very beginning . You proved to me that i can d it. By dedicating myself and working har at it. Very happy and proud to call you my friend. YOu r doing great and I know that you will have a 6 pack in no time.

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LOVE_KRISTIN 12/11/2010 7:10AM

  Love your blog... you're doing so great!!! I agree with you - it makes me feel so much better reading comments on my spark page, blog, or feed!! =)

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LYNN-I-CAN2 12/10/2010 11:26PM

    Lady Bug, you know, I'm your number 1 fan here on sparks. You keep on pushing for the best, and everything you do is balance.
You sure do push me... U are a motivator girl.. Keep on sparking, and doing your best, and enjoy the wine...

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SEXYSLIM78 12/10/2010 10:00PM

    Steph girl u most definitely help me and i sure a lot of others on sp. Even though i am not were i need to be far as commitment, consistancy, etc....u encourage me not to give up. emoticon

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GODSBABYGAL 12/10/2010 5:16PM

    Amen, I totally understand and agree with you. emoticon

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Dusted Myself Off

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

So it's Tuesday and things are going good again.

I picked myself up Sunday night and had a workout. Some extra abs work too - that's my goal now so need the work being done there! Monday i ate well and rested. Tuesday, today i have eaten well, eaten a little more carbs, in the higher part of my daily goal for my workout tonight. I had fun with tonight's workout and did 10 mins of fast upbeat dancing, (extra part on dvd) it was so funny because i have no rythym (sp?!) and can't do the moves properly but hell i tried and laughed my butt off too hehe!

For dinner i cooked my own "Tamarind & Salmon Curry"... and it went really well. Spicy! Gots some left over for lunch tomorrow too, and it's nice knowing exactly what is in it. =)

Got a Japanese recipe to do tomorrow, only an omelette but i am keeping my eating FRESH again and pushing my workouts.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMTHICK2 12/9/2010 10:41AM

    You seem to be doing quite well emoticon enjoy the rest of your week. emoticon

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LOVE_KRISTIN 12/8/2010 6:13AM

  Haha sounds like fun!! I have no rhythm either... i tried zumba and it didn't last very long! Glad your still on track -I was doing so good this month then the past few days i slipped and quit tracking! Ugghh I wish I could just stick with it, i want to reach my goal! Keep with it, you're such an inspiration to me to keep going!

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DAVEYSHADOW 12/8/2010 3:45AM

    Sounds good, gald to hear you managed to get over Saturday, on e day or so doesa not ruin all your hard work!

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SEXYSLIM78 12/7/2010 9:00PM

    Good for you girlie. You can do it. Wish i had me some curry but unfortunately i dont have a recipe. Anyway girl, keep on giving it your all emoticon

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LYNN-I-CAN2 12/7/2010 7:02PM

    Go ahead, Lady Bug with your bad self. That's how you do it. Keep on pushing yourself to do your best, and do you 100%.
Congrats are in order... emoticon emoticon

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CBARRETT10 12/7/2010 6:57PM

  The menu sounds yummy! emoticon
The rythm thing...needs work! emoticon emoticon
Good luck!

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FITJEANS 12/7/2010 6:32PM

    lol I have know rythm either . They sure are fun to try though. love curry ne thing. Love what your doing , trying exotic foods . I wish I was at your house emoticon this week emoticon emoticon emoticon. I would love to try the tamarind n salmon curry recipe, sounds delicioso. emoticon emoticon

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CASSYCHAOS 12/7/2010 4:17PM

    Ooo curry! How do you feel about sharing your recipe? I just love eastern foods but totally lack culinary creativity!

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-POOKIE- 12/7/2010 4:15PM

    Sounds good to me! I love experimenting with cooking, just usually feel its a waste just for myself.

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