VERGE_OF_ME   37,129
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Gratitudes and Goodie Grief....

Friday, March 07, 2008

It's TGIF and I have a whole lot of things to be TG'ing about:

** We have finally completely collected for, delivered, and rid my tiny living room and my brain of over $700 in Girl Scout cookies. I managed to ALMOST keep myself out of them for the most part...and in doing so took "eyes in the back of my head" off almost 4 y/o son for a split which he managed to consume a whole sleeve out of someone elses order...OY! Just to replace the one box took ordering a whole other case of 12 to find homes for in lieu of my rump. is a day when the cookies are no more....can I please get a Hallelujah!!!

**Next point of TG'ing....I am down 4.8 lbs. this week....lard be GONE!! I am approaching my 1 yr. Sparkiversary and am down 89 lbs. I owe every ounce of that to Spark and my family of friends here. This was a huge, huge point of motivation for me because I have worked sooo hard...thanks in large part to the two challenges I am participating in this month...they helped me so much psych myself into stepping up my excercise. It's been a LONG time since I had results like that...and I don't expect to see them again anytime soon, but I have succesfully got my body back into the mode it needs to be in for results. The only downside is that my house is a complete shambles and I am having to come to terms with the fact I cannot do it all(so not easy for my beyond Type A self). To keep this momentum up...I have to put myself and what I need to do for health much closer to the top of the list. My house was previously spotless, no matter what...and I was morbidly obese, lethargic, unhappy, and in all honesty...literally dying. house looks like...ummm....the atom bomb went off...BUT..I have excercised for at least 60 min. EVERY not quite as getting happier...and am LIVING life least to the best of my fairly sequestered sahmness abilities : D GOOD!..and just in the nick of time because in May I will be facing......

**Fat Girl's Nightmare!!!! - Yup...that's right...B-E-A-C-H *heavy sigh* I am mentally not ready for this yet...but that's all just tough tiadora because it's already booked and non-refundable, LOL. My daddy retired this year and he and step-mom are taking us to Mexico(see pic of resort above)....I haven't been on a vacation since I was like....10 I think. This was all a very sudden and recent development...and I wasn't given much chance to protest...(who in their right mind would...just goes to prove I am NOT in my right mind, LOL) I am still coming to terms with the fact that I have to stuff my arse into a bathing suit...and in public no less. I don't know which is worse...that...or the thought of my son being cooped up on an airplane for 3 should prove interesting at the very, very least ; D All dripping sarcasm aside though...I am very grateful at the opportunity to see somewhere else in the world besides Oklahoma City....especially for my children as we may never be able to do something like this for them.

** Last but not least....I have finally dug around enough to figure out the Spark Goodies....and you know what...lo and behold.....they have messages that come with's only taken me two weeks to figure that out =O That is definitely where Linus(or whoever it was) would roll their eyes and exclaim "good grief Charlie Brown!" LOL!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIKEEO 3/27/2008 2:41PM

    Well poo, I missed your one year anniversary. I'm sooo proud of you Darlin. I'm TGing for you...just because you are you. Have fun at the beach, it sounds like something the whole family will enjoy...I WANT PICTURES. (((HUGS)))

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JCROWELL 3/7/2008 8:50PM

    LOL...I'd gladly take your place in the fat girl nightmare complete with 3 hours of toddler on a plane craziness to avoid the ice storm that is currently coming our way...seriously though, I am sure that you will have an amazing time, and don't forget, you have dropped a lot of pounds since the last time you "stuffed your self into a bathing suit", I bet it will be better than you are imagining!

I am SO proud of you for all the hard work you have been putting into your weight loss lately! Congratulations on your fabulous loss! You are doing an amazing job!!!

Thanks for the spark goodies and comments you left me today! You made me feel really special, and I sure needed it today!!!

Have a great weekend sweetie! Now I'm going back to bed to try and sleep away this sore throat! DH is home and I am going to take full advantage of his willingness to take care of Nicky while I am sick! Love you! ~Jenn

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LAGUGAEL 3/7/2008 7:39PM

    Only you, Laura :)
The question is, were the cookies good?

And I am so happy for your weight loss are inspirational to me and help keep me focused on my weight loss goals. You'll look great at the beach--you've come so far you should show it off, girl!

And as for the Spark goodies, I just figured out a week or two ago myself that they come with messages. I was leaving notes for others but had no clue how to read my own!


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CIAMOM 3/7/2008 5:22PM

    Laura, you have come so far!! I'm so happy for you!! There will be YEARS ahead of you to do housework to your heart's content - no rush! ;) Spend time focusing on you and the people you love, the rest will get done in time, and if it doesn't, big whoop because piles of clothes and dishes aren't anywhere near as important as your health and your LIFE!! And woo-hoo for Mexico!! That resort looks fabulous!! You'll be there with your family, and everyone else will be strangers (who gives a flip what they think? ;)), so you just enjoy this opportunity you've been given! Live it up!! (and sip a Tahitian Sunset while lounging by the water for me!) :)

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    You'll have a blast in Mexico, Laura and if I could manage to tag along I so would! No worries about the beach...the beach is a place that rejuvenates your soul...brings peace to your heart...and relaxation to your entire body. Soak up every ounce of it, and if you've still got room, soak up some for me.... The beach is only a short drive for me, and something I crave almost daily, yet I rarely get the time to get down there... You'll look and feel beautiful soaking up that sun!! 89 pounds? Suweeeet!!

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TNTSMOMIE 3/7/2008 1:52PM

    Yay for no-more-cookies!! We only managed to buy 3 boxes of Somoas this year. Actually, DD and I bought them for hubby. We still have 2 boxes in the fridge. You know...cause you HAVE to eat them cold.

Also, YAY for Mexico. I've spent time in Mazatlan and Acapulco (the first being my favorite)...but I've heard great things about several other places. Where are you going? And can I stow-away in your luggage and come too?? :o)


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For My 80's Music Lover's Team

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

"I'm lovin' the 80s ~ Week 1 of March!!"

Holy crap...I cannot believe I am actually posting this. Can you feel the breeze coming off those 80's Aquanet hair wings...sheesh. This was me in my prom getup circa these days are soooo missing out by not getting to wear hoop skirts and Scarlett O'Hara floofy dresses, lmao!
ROCK ON and Rock Off the lbs. fellow 80's ML!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRECECOOKS 3/7/2008 1:12PM

    You look BEAUTIFUL ~ I hope you had a wonderful time.

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JAYELLE42 3/7/2008 12:53AM

    Laura, remind me to reload the pic of my prom dress, I know exactly how you feel. I had a triple-layer crinoline under mine :) And the hair wings were my standard for years. Was that Junior or Senior prom? If senior... mine was the same year!

-- The other Laura from the 80s music lovers

Comment edited on: 3/7/2008 12:53:05 AM

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CIAMOM 3/5/2008 2:29AM

    You are so cute, Laura!! I am LOVING this!! I can almost hear Peter Cetera singing "Glory Of Love" in the background, LOL! :)

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    Sweet, Laura! Wow, what a hottie! I dig the hair and the dress is so totally bitchen! Congrats on earning the 100 points!

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TNTSMOMIE 3/4/2008 8:31PM

    Can I just say, I was 5 when that picture was taken???
Haha. Feelin' old yet??? :o)

You are super cute, hun. And I know that dress is still in your closet. :o) No?

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JCROWELL 3/4/2008 8:24PM

    you're so cute! : )

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AANDW05 3/4/2008 8:15PM


I loved and still love the 80's!! My 15 yr old loves 80's music's so funny, he should have been born back, those were the days! And I loved it and I too had 5 mile high hair..LOL!!!
I'll have to find some pics and post um..LOL!!

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MOJAVEMAMA 3/4/2008 7:28PM

    Aquanet? Is there something wrong with Aquanet? You gotta love it. We all had wings back then.

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JENLYA 3/4/2008 7:21PM

    Omgosh.. you are sooo cute! I had a prom dress that was almost that same color too! I had my hair up in the back and VERY high on top! LOL I wish I had a scanner! Aaaaah yes, those were the days... Aqua Net... a can a week.... holding the pick in the hair right where you want it and spraying away and then sealing the deal with the blow dryer! hahahaha

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    I had a totally awesome time at my prom in 1986! Those were the days!

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Full speed ahead....

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Time to pick up where I left off back at the beginning of this new year. Nothing like a tidal wave of life to drown the SPARK right out of you sometimes...but I managed to flail my way back up to the surface and after being drug back down more than a few times in the past couple of months...I am swimming steadily along now. I am so glad that I chose the background for my page that I did back in January...because today it helped remind me of how I felt when I found it...strong, empowered, full of movement and forward momentum....moving consistently towards my goal. I'm trading in the stress and strife that has held me under and reclaiming those feelings for my own now....ready to walk on....and maybe even run a full speed ahead : )

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAGUGAEL 3/4/2008 3:16AM

    I'm so happy you're here. Maybe we can feed from each other's strength and make it down to "one"derland! Let's go girl :)

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CORI_L 3/3/2008 8:43AM

    Hey, sweet thing! So glad to see you back! *super glues you to Spark* I hear you about that tidal wave of life - but I know you're doing great, and this is going to be an awesome month! Though I hope you've budgeted for those speeding tickets.... *g*

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JENLYA 3/1/2008 2:46PM

    Yaaaaay!!! Yer back!! I can hear your tires squealing as you are taking off!

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TNTSMOMIE 3/1/2008 12:39PM

    Um, your speedometer reads 150. Anyone else find that a little scary? :o)
I'm so very glad you're back. I'm missed you so much!! When's your half-mary?? I really need to get into my training, but kinda just dipping my toes into it until the weather gets nice.
Big hugs! Hope you're doing better.

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MOVETHESCALE 3/1/2008 11:57AM

    I'm so happy to see you back, I have missed your postings.

EMPOWERED.... what a great word to express how you can feel.
Have a wonderful weekend and MARCH is going to be great.
{{{hugs }}}

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CIAMOM 3/1/2008 11:07AM

    Full speed ahead, YES!! Here we go!! :)

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MIKEEO 3/1/2008 9:51AM

    Just seeing you on the boards brightens my day. I'm with you all the way Darlin...I always will be...we ALL will be. (((HUGS)))

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A glance back before moving forward...

Saturday, January 05, 2008

Grab a bottle of water if you intend to make it to the end of this,lol...I'll warn you now it's long, but I have so much flying around in my head right now. I am so thrilled to have all the holiday hoopla behind so that at least some of my time can be spent in ways I choose...and not so much how life has been demanding. The effects of the ice storm took a toll on us here and coupled with the chaos of visiting in-laws, outlaws, and ex-laws etc...well....honestly I'm just glad it's over.

I have so much enthusiasm and just sheer gratitude to be back amongst my SPARK friends and to refocus on my journey and see what and how you all are doing! So much has changed in my life, in myself...all due to what I have found here.

All in all, the collateral damage of what shall now be referred to as Christmas Sparkus Interruptus was relatively minor, I was very lucky for that. The last of the holiday feasting for our family didn't conclude until this past Tuesday, so I decided back in early December that I was going to have to take it all in stride. I tremble at the mere whiff of my sil's cheesecake or my mom's homemade ham salad...not to mention all the other savory and sweet delights that fill the gaps in between. So rather than freak and fret over all that lay ahead, I made a conscious decision to meet each morsel as it presented itself and take one day, one meal at a time. I was continuously surprised at how the knowledge I have gained here at SP really stayed in the conscious forefront of my choices and I enjoyed my ride on the Holiday Smorgasbord Express with complete awareness instead of blind gluttony albeit with some relative guilt. I knew there would be consequences on the scale...which there was, but I did not let that discourage me or steal my pleasure. SP has given me the confidence of knowing that I am in control of where I'm going and that a little detour now and then is nothing but that, a little detour.

After a few days of getting healthy foods back into my body, I am now .2 lbs down from where I started, and I am now feeling better and more energized, ready to get back to excercising regularly which is long overdue.

There have been a few things happen recently that truly helped me see how far I've come since finding SP last March.

1. I was able to sit down on a snow saucer...and ride said saucer down a hill with my children...and crash and fall off saucer...and was able to haul my big arse back up out of the muck..and repeat aforementioned nonsense a humphzillion times, something I would barely dare dream of, much less venture. In my previous life...if my knees would ever have bent enough to even get on the darn thing...once I came off it would have been all she wrote...there would definitely have been a crane involved in righting me to a standing position again. NO MORE!!

2. Running stairs at the Brick...the big baseball facility in OKC. They set up a "snow tube" there over the holidays....a big slide set up on a scaffold covered in man made snow. They tube down to the infield from the middle deck and then haul tube and self back up to do it again....those dang tubes are HEAVY and dd couldn't carry it but for a few enter mom...lugging tube and self up and down all those steps for the entire hour and a half session. I was a little winded...but only for have no idea how amazing that was for me. This time last trip up...if I made it that far...would have certainly resulted in an ugly scene...involving an ambulance...and oxygen...and the seeing of "the" white light...oy. DD has asked to do this for a few years now, but I knew that if I took her...I wouldn't be able to help her....NO MORE!!

3. In a brief moment of brilliant clarity or rampant insanity(I'm leaning towards the latter) I have decided to enter and walk my first half-marathon. There..I said it in now it is out of the security of my brain and out in the universe...a commitment to keep. I was inspired by my SP friends here who are in training for one...and when I found that this one benefits the OKC Bombing Memorial(something close to my heart) and welcomed walkers...well, I felt it was meant to be. April 27, I come!! I have no idea what a chip time is...and have to scrape up the $50 entry fee somehow...but ON!

4. Pictures. Yes...a picture is worth a thousand words...or in this case...closing in on 100 lbs....lost that is : ) I have always been so painfully aware and ashamed of how I looked...I never let pictures of myself be I had very few, especially full body shots, to measure my progress. I found two from late 2006 early 2007...and actually took a few over the Christmas break to see if I could tell a difference, and I finally can. Even though I know I have dropped several clothes really helped to see it in a photo...even though I hate seeing those old ones so much. It gave me an honest perspective of where I was and where I am. Unabashed honesty(with myself and you) have been a huge part of this for me and I have learned so much and am still learning. I do know that I will do everything in my power to NEVER go back there again!! The pics are in my gallery if you would like to check them out.

2007 will forever be remembered by me as a pivotal turning point in my life. I don't know what happened that day in March when I found myself staring at on my screen..what was so monumentally different in the alignment of the planets, what it was that finally clicked in my head and heart that never had before that enabled me to get off my duff and make change possible in my life and make it stick, all through my own sweat and well as with the sweat and tears of those of you here through this with me. Divine intervention would be the only explanation I could offer...and my gratitude for all things SPARK grows daily.

It just goes to show you can never give up hope...never quit trying even if like me, you have failed at the same thing , this quest for health, over and over so many uncountable times before. That next time...that next click of the mouse may just be the time the planets will line up for you too. There is no statute of limitations on starting over when your health, life, and happiness are in the stakes..NEVER give up. It simply was not in my realm of possibility to be where I am today...or to be within reach of an ultimate goal...for me...the impossible is now possible, which means that can happen for ANYONE!! The road has been long and arduous in more ways than could be stated...and the road ahead is just as long with highs and lows that remain to be seen...but the tools at SP have given me the knowledge and my family of friends here, old and new, have given and continue to give me the support, courage, and understanding that help me see myself through and over any obstacle that comes my way, of that I am certain now. I offer those same things and more back to each and every one of you as we continue on this journey together this year.

Yes...2007 saw me leave 76 lbs. of myself behind, but truthfully, I gained so much more than I lost. I gained knowledge, power of mind and body, I am building self-confidence and self-esteem more each passing day, and am starting to feel the benefits of what it feels like to live healthfully. Even all that greatness pales in comparison to the fact that most importantly...I gained a whole arsenal of friends who mean more to me each one separately as well as collectively than mere words could ever hope to express. Thank you each and all for sharing your lives and your journey with me. I would not be here now without the support you have given me along the way. I cannot thank you enough.

THANK YOU SPARK for making all of this possible for me..... for anyone! Now I am so ready to move forward...and SPARK-O-LATE in 2008!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BAAB_GIRL 1/13/2008 3:38PM

    Hey girl! I am a little late in commenting, but whole heartedly agree with all the previous comments! You ARE amazing! I love reading your blog entries. They are inspiring, beautiful, and achingly real. The one thing that really speaks to me is your "unabashed honesty". I know that was one of the keys to my weight loss. Denial/hiding takes a lot of energy. It's NOT a lot easier just to fess up, but the benefit is the awesome support of the people on this site who are going through the same struggles and helping each other through the rough spots. The truth is setting us free!!


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ANEWLORI 1/7/2008 11:02AM

    Oh how I've missed you! I have to agree with everyone here; I'm so proud of you and what you've accomplished - you're such an inspiration!! And you're doing a half mary?! That's AWESOME!!! I will be routing you on hun - I know you can do it!!! I so love your blogs; they usually make me cry from either laughter or because you say things that really touch me and make me think just when I need it most!! You go girl, I know you will accomplish all that you set out to this year!!!! (((hugs)))

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5KITTIES 1/6/2008 4:11PM

    Oh Laura! This blog entry is just one of the many reasons why I need you! You are so amazing and I am in awe of you. You said so many things that I am feeling but just unable to put into words. I could almost cry at the thought of you helping carry the snow tube, that is just wonderful. So you're in the game for a half-marathon? WOOHOO- I'm here cheering you on girl. Welcome back:)

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JENLYA 1/6/2008 4:29AM

    I'm with Dorothy on this one... for once, I'm speechless! You are amazingly inspirational. I love your 2008 slogan too! I know you are going to do everything you set out to do!


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MOVETHESCALE 1/6/2008 1:37AM

    How do you respond to such a positive well written post.
Except Thank you for being YOU!

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CORI_L 1/6/2008 1:36AM

    *hugs* to you, my dear. So glad you're back, and so glad you can look back on the year with such wisdom. You are completely amazing and inspiring to me, and I know 2008 is going to hold even more incredible things for you!!

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CIAMOM 1/6/2008 1:08AM

    That may very well have been the best blog entry I've ever read! Seriously! Not only are you beautiful, funny and sweet - you're eloquent, girl! :) Thank you for sharing all that with us, thank you for sharing your wonderful self with us! Here's to a bitchin' 2008!! :)

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TCEDEROTH 1/5/2008 8:18PM

    'sniff, sniff', Very near tears here. It is so wonderful to see your accomplishments and how far you have come to this point. Your attitude is inspiring, even when you take those "detours" you spoke of. There are going to be so many pounds lost through SparkPeople this year that the planet may spin off of it's proper axis. I'm glad you're here, and sharing your goals with us, and your successes.

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JCROWELL 1/5/2008 5:16PM

    Laura~ I am so proud of you for how far you have come on this journey and for how far I know you will go! I know you will reach your goal! You have proven that you can do this! I am so greatful to have met you on this journey! Let's kick butt this year and show what we can do when we put our minds to it! *hugs* ~Jenn

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    Awesome, Laura! It's so GREAT to see you back again and to read all of your accomplishments! I did the same thing...I blogged a couple of days ago about my accomplishments and I felt so inspired and empowered! Good for you!! Keep that Spark lit, Girl!!

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Ice Storm

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

I just wanted to check in with everyone who might have noticed me MIA again while I have the chance. We have been hit hard by a nasty ice storm. Our power came back on late last night along with internet(whew...I was getting the shakes,lol..from spark withdrawals, not cold!) so I wanted to let ya'll know that me and mine are fine now...just have some limb clean up to get on yard isn't bad at all compared to those poor folks that have more trees. I have a beautiful and very old and huge oak tree that I love, and by some miracle of God, didn't come down on our's limbs were hung down, but most never broke...many not so lucky. Lots of people still in the cold and dark too....I am feeling VERY blessed and grateful right now for sure! So, again it seems that life is trying to steal my Spark time and doing a great job of it...but I hope to be back on more regularly without issue,lol...very soon. The stress has gotten to me a bit and I had an ugly incident with several no bake cookies(and a block of cream cheese, salsa, and chips..and etc., etc., etc.)..ugg....and not being able to cook except outside with the propane really made me stop to think about the choices I was making out of convenience. Got to get back going with the excercise...and I'll be set. Even though in the past, things like this have felt like failure and total derailment...I now know it was just a temporary incident and I am back in the driver's seat already...and THAT feels GREAT! I apologize to the challenges I have joined in and haven't been able to participate...but just wanted to update while I could. Today the ice is all melted and it is just pouring cold rain...but they are saying more ice after midnight is a good possibility :( Soo...who knows...I'm ready to thaw out....just wish we could get some snow instead of this crap!! Hope you are all well and sparking merrily along your way....feeling great and healthy....I miss my time here...and especially my friends here SOOO much!!! Love to all!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CIAMOM 12/21/2007 5:51PM

    Wow, I completely missed this blog! My subscriptions conspire against me sometimes...

I've been TOTALLY worried about you, so it's good to hear that the storms didn't hit you TOO badly! I miss seeing you around (virtually speaking, of course :)) - hope you can get back on here more regularly soon!!

Take good care! ((hugs))

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BAAB_GIRL 12/12/2007 4:00PM

    Hi darlin'! I'm so thankful you and yours are ok. Hopefully things will calm down soon. Life does tend to throw us curves in attempts to extinguish our Spark doesn't it. Love ya!!!


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GRUMPYGRAMS 12/12/2007 1:10AM

    Thank God that big tree didn't fall on your house. I've seen the horrible devistation on tv in some of the states. We got some of the ice too. And like you, it rained all day. I was just outside a few minutes ago (it's midnight now), & my driveway is all ice. The rain that fell, is now frozen & dangerous. I hate snow, but would rather have that, than this stuff! Take care, be careful if you drive or go outside. I hope your power stays on for you, that way you can at least Spark away the hours! Good luck!

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MOVETHESCALE 12/12/2007 12:19AM

    I was stopping by to check on you and how you were feeling. Plus the storm, so happy that you are ok. I like what you said about ugly incident, that you now know that it was a temporary incident. I have to remember that still. We got the rain, sleet and snow here. More snow angels maybe?
see you on the boards (weather permitting)

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HEALTHIERLYNN 12/11/2007 5:16PM

    Good to hear from you, Laura! I was getting worried about ya! :-) Be safe out there!

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GREEKGODJB 12/11/2007 5:00PM

    Glad to hear your OK..I hate Ice Storms, it seems like they do more damage than anything!

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JENLYA 12/11/2007 4:37PM

    My word! An ice storm! Those are NO fun, been through one of those too. But, we were one of the fortunate ones that didn't lose power! I'm glad you are doing ok and I hope the ice doesn't take your power again when it freezes over again. I was laughing reading your blog because I was contemplating making no-bakes today! Do you put peanut butter in yours too? I haven't met anyone that makes those yet.. you are the first one! I always make them and have my friends try them out and of course... they are hooked. lol Welp, have a good one girly!


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WENDYSUE72 12/11/2007 4:30PM

    I am so glad that you are okay! :)

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TNTSMOMIE 12/11/2007 4:23PM

    Missing you lots, hun! The last ice storm I went through was in 1999. We were without power for 2 weeks. Of course, we lived on an island, so they had to get all the mainland power back on first. But it went out on Xmas Eve and stayed out until just before New Year's. I'll tell ya, though, it was my most memorable Xmas, and in a good way. I'm glad to hear ya'll are okay. hugs!

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