Friday, August 29, 2014
Yesterday, I got a call from a job I applied on. It was only preliminary work such as answering a 250 questions questionnaire about who I am and how I relate to authority. I hope it fits what they want! My hopes arenít high at the moment because I fell really hard this winter when I didnít get the job I fantasized about.
Itís going better at work, my change of attitude is doing the work by itself. I try to see this job as an opportunity to get experience even though I know itís not a job I wanna do for a longtime. My boss is also treating me more gently and sheís more respectful. Her tone has changed toward me. One of our graphic designers recently put her foot down and decided to quit if our boss didnít give her what she felt was acceptable conditions. I feel it made her re-think the whole way she treats us.
I visited a friend yesterday, I needed to speak to someone; thinking out loud with someone helps. Iím more the type to listen to what people have to say, a lot more than the type to talk about myself and the problems I encounter. I used to be the first type though. My analysis of the situation is that having a boyfriend, a house, a job I like and a family is what I want as a 30 years old something and being with my boyfriend fulfill this vision I have. And I didnít think about how I felt or what I wanted becauseÖ well, I thought it was fulfilled entirely. Itís been a good six months since I first started to feel uneasy about the whole thing, feeling more stressed than usual and not coping so well. I still donít have the answer to my questions but my mind is lighter.
My autumn is going to be busy, I will play volleyball and hockey every week and possibly a gym class. Also, I am taking archery and theater classes. These last two have me very excited! Iíve always had that dream of being an actress in Hollywood =) I know I wonít make it to Hollywood but one can dream and dreaming is good for the soul!
And this weekend, we have a soft ball tournament with my bfís family, itís a tradition for September 1st weekend. Weíve got a good team, Iím going to play second base (as I asked my bf!) and weíre gonna have fun. I hope all goes well and that I can enjoy myself as much as usual although I have questions in my hearth.
TGIF! And hereís some stats that Iím really proud of:
+ Iíve received SPís Consistency Trophy every month since February (7 months)
+ Iíve received 1 000 Fitness Minutes Award in May, and 1 500 Fitness Minutes Award in March, June, July and now, August.
+ Iíve now lost 30 pounds, itís official!
Have a wonderful weekend, folks
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
To celebrate my 8 months of commitment, Iíve decided to start Jillian Michaelsí 30 days shred program. And Wow, bicycle crunches are killer! And my arms are so weakÖ It can only do me good. I decided to do it because one of my friends posted about her videos on Facebook and I thought to myself ďWhy not?Ē Iíve been a bit lazy lately about working HARD. I do a lot of sports with my boyfriend: volleyball, tennis, hockey... But I am not progressing really, I can run without being out of breath but my muscles wonít follow. Strength training is the key and as I find it hard to do ST, well, the least I can do is something that I enjoy!
Jillian Michaelsí approach is really different than the one I am used to. Coach Nicole is sweet and understanding, Jessica Smith is dynamicÖ and Jillianís a bit of a tyrant lol But as she says, if she makes big promises, she needs to deliver and how you do it? By working HARD!
Also, Iím doing good on eating clean and wholesome food. I am back to eating eggs and bacon in the morning and a big salad for lunch. Dinnertime is always a bit trickier but I succeeded to make a lot of paleo recipes. Iíve never been the type to use a cookbook. I had the Spark Cookbook at home, I had one Oprah did... and never really used it. Now, Iíve put one together, with printed recipes and it makes a big difference. So far, Iíve done a lot of chicken recipes, a paleo pizza (I wasnít able to make the crust hold together but it was yummy), frittata and so on. As much as I enjoyed a good pasta dish, I donít eat it anymore and having recipes that are easy and delicious on hand makes the switch easier.
My sister is in therapy, sheís an addict. She had a weekend out the last weekend and we spent a lot of time together. I went to her NA meeting and I spoke out when the time came. I didnít prepare it though I felt like it had to mean something, that I was there with her. She put me through hell more times than I care to remember and Iím happy that she finally decided to do something about it. The meeting was dynamic and it focuses on the person as a whole not just the ďIím an addictĒ part though itís a big thing to admit youíre one. And I feel better about myself for going even if I felt out of place the whole time. See, Iíve been going to AlAnon meetings and the vibe you get from it is SO different from the one you encounter in a NA meeting. I was invited to go back and I might just do it even if I feel a bit like a cheat.
Itís not going so well with my boyfriend lately. Iíve been asking myself a lot of questions. Questions I cannot quite answer yet. The situation is stressful and I donít manage it so well these days. Iíve always made braids in my hair when I felt stressed and I do it so often that my hair break and I have a side thatís longer than the other. Iíve even dreamt I was bald. Anyway, this stress is very painful to live with and I write a lot about how I feel, trying to untangle everything.
Venting out is a good way to lower the stress. So Thank you for reading me. & back to work now!
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
OMG! There's this dress I absolutely love that I bought back in 2008... it still fit in 2012 but I wanted to wear it for my friend's wedding in May 2014 and it didn't fit.. NOW, it does =)
I need to wash it in bleach so it gets back to a purer white but.. here it is. (Never mind the hair, it was this morning hehe)
Wow! I'm so glad =) I wanted to have something with a summer vibe this morning as we are going out for lunch for my birthday with my colleagues. There's always a mandatory pictures and this time, I wanna stand out =)
Eating right and moving my ass is paying out. I'm one pound away form the 30 pounds lost mark. Summer has been a bit difficult, I had way too much ice cream and pizza but also, I played a lot of hockey and volleyball and I went w3alking a lot on my lunch break.
All right! Have a good day, folks.
Monday, August 11, 2014
Iím finally 30. I kinda felt it would be more of a big deal for me. But it appears, itís nothing at all. Iím reading this book about how we let things that we have no control over, affect our mood and our perception of things over time. About how grudges can affect us when we think weíve not been treated the right way. In so many ways, all of this applies to me. Letís say, I despise my job but is it my bossí fault? Do I have to hold a grudge against her to be the way she is? No. Iím not happy so Iím looking for something else but I should not punish her and not do my best because Iím unhappy. The thing is, everything is tinted by my perception. So, yeah, I hate my job but as long as Iím here, Iíll try at least to do my best. I donít make that much sense, huh?
As for my new Paleo lifestyle, itís getting good. I did my first cauliflower rice this week, it was good but a bit bland so I need to find other ways to spice it up a bit. I also did salmon cakes, those were really good and even better the day after in my salad. Tonight, Iíll make chicken thigh with a new recipe and bake broccoli. Just thinking of it, nom nom! Iíve also made egg muffins which are also a bit bland but I tend to cut the ďspiceĒ part of recipes so I really need to stop doing that.
Last week has been kind of a disaster sugar wise. And Iím kind of a hypocrite in a way that I will not eat bread/cheese at home but will indulge when I eat out or at someoneís. So I am starting this Paleo 95% streak which will cumulate days I ate 95% paleo and plus. Itís done ☼
Have a wonderful week, folks =)
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Iíve been so lazy the past couple of days. I didnít eat breakfast at home or packed my lunch or ate in for dinner for soooo long. Itís getting difficult on my budget which I totally screwed for that reason. Sometimes, it just seems too heavy to carry around, this new Paleo lifestyle but then, most of the time, I think itís worth it.
And Iím getting better at it. Before, I could go on for months, doing nothing and just being sorry for myself that I wasnít reaching my goals. Now, it last for days sometime weeks but not months. I read my SP page just a moment ago and I wrote ďDoing my bestÖĒ and thatís what I am doing. My best.
Yesterday, though I went overboard for breakfast, I was able to salvage my day. It helps that I had a hockey game too. Today, I started with eggs and bacon. No omelet, no veggies. It saved me a good 20 minutes. All the preparation involved in the Paleo lifestyle is demanding so I thought to myself : Do I really need to make an omelet every morning when I sit at my desk all day and I have plenty of time to get my 5-7 daily freggies. Well, the obvious answer is no. It kinda felt like cheating this morning but heh, why not make my life easier? And forget the so unnecessary guilt?
During my week off, I gained 2 pounds but I was able to lose them the week after. I played 3 hockey games that week, that obviously helped =) We played softball too, I like it so much!
Iím gonna turn 30 in just a couple of days, on August 4Ö that freaks me out. A bit because 30 seems like a very big number but mostly because I am not where I thought Iíd be. I donít have a job I like nor a salary that will allow me to buy a house in the near future, I donít have kids, I still have my old carÖ Kinda disappointed. BUT, my boyfriend is throwing a party for me, I canít wait for Saturday =)
Now, have a good week folks and keep pushing ☼
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