Wednesday, October 01, 2014
Well, I am doing a little better although not a lot. I am still eating too much, and didn't weigh in last Sunday, but I've been recording most of my foods, and walking a little faster - even almost jogging a bit - with the dogs. It's still a struggle every day, though; many days I just want to curl up and stay in bed all day. But each time I go out with the dogs I feel better; as long as I remember that, and use it to motivate me, at least I should keep getting some exercise!
Also Frank has a hernia (apparently it is not enough to have cancer, as well as Crohn's and celiac disease, and an ostomy) so he can't walk the dogs at all - he can walk but I need to do all the dog handling. So I am.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Well, for a while there I quit recording my foods, quit exercising except for walking the dogs (which I got my son to do a lot of), and quit weighing in. I finally did weigh on Sunday, and have put on 3 pounds in 3 weeks. Not horrible but not the right direction either. I have recorded my foods so far today and plan to keep it up.
I have been really tired lately; I think Frank's cancer coming back is really depressing me. He's depressed too, didn't get up this morning at all. He doesn't want to eat, either (so I've been eating for him, I think, which doesn't work at all). He still can't get his ostomy bag to work, either; I've found some resources for him but he is still very upset and depressed about it too.
So there it is. I'm not doing either of us any good by falling apart, so I guess I will get myself back together again. Sigh.
Friday, September 05, 2014
Well, I don't know that I can call these last 28 days an unqualified success. I have not really thrown myself into the stress management program as thoroughly as I had imagined myself doing when I started. However, I have learned some good techniques for dealing with stress, and goodness knows I've had enough stressful situations to practice on!
The main thing I want to do is to keep working with my trainer. She's a counseling student as well as a physical trainer, and the 3 hours per week I spend with her are good for me in many ways. I tell her things I don't tell anyone else, and I know she will keep my confidences. This has been very useful, especially during these last couple of months. I am going to be sad when she graduates!
So that's about it for now. Have a good weekend, everyone!
Sunday, August 31, 2014
My husband and I met our minister for lunch on Thursday; I'd told her that he was having a really hard time dealing with the recurrence of his cancer, and she brought some materials that he may find helpful. One of the things she suggested was journaling; that's pretty much what I am doing here. I know these blogs are online where in principle a lot of people could read them, but I suspect that not too many are doing so.
So I continue to struggle with emotional eating. I was doing quite well back in March, when I finally realized that the person making all the decisions about what I eat is me, and that telling myself that I just can't control myself around food is not a useful message. I stayed quite mindful of what I was eating - and aware that every bite I took was a decision I had made - until my husband got sick in late June. Since then I seem to have forgotten that I am the one in charge of my eating, and have let it get out of hand quite a lot. Yes, there is a lot of stress in my life right now, but overeating isn't helping.
So I am going to keep remembering that I am in charge, and will make conscious decisions about what to eat. This should actually be pretty easy for the next two months, while we are still getting our weekly vegetable box delivery. In fact, I cooked up a root vegetable stew this afternoon, and little boxes of it are now filling my freezer while I enjoy a green smoothie.
I also need to fit in more exercise on the days my trainer doesn't come; that's the next project.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
So I haven't blogged for the past week, but I have thought about stress and how I am dealing with it. I do have a personal trainer who comes to my house three times a week (this is much less extravagant than it sounds; she charges $10 per session). She is also a counseling student, and we have some very good talks when we walk. Generally, when it is nice out, we walk for 1/2 hour and then do weights for another 1/2 hour, finishing off with some stretching. This has helped me a lot; it's time I have for myself, and the results are really helping. I am much stronger now than I was a year ago.
Other than that, the women's chorus I sing with has started fall rehearsals; I missed the national festival this summer because my husband was in the hospital, and it's good to be with them again.
Still working on getting my eating back on track; I've been doing a lot of emotional eating for the past couple of months. I know this isn't good in the long run but it's very hard to resist sometimes.
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