TWINKLETERESA   3,374
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2 steps forward, 10 pounds back.... on

Wednesday, March 07, 2012

How do I do this to myself? I don't get it! I have motion sickness so you think I would not keep riding this roller coaster. That I would not like the feeling of up and down, up and down of the yo-yo cycle that I am on. Yet, here I am, lost 12 pounds while diligently following my SparkPeople plan, when I climbed on the front row of the coaster. My weight began to go up 2 down 2, go up 4 down 3, and somehow I managed to convince myself that it's ok, as I am still at or right around the 12 pounds lost. When suddenly, the roller coaster goes crazy looping around the track at break neck speed and I have 10 pounds back on. Whoa, isn't that supposed to be 2 steps forward 1 step back? Not for me, it was 12 pounds off and 10 pounds back on! I could just cry.

So what's my story? I started SparkPeople in November of 2011. I began like a race horse out of the gate. I followed this new plan of tracking my food and fitness and counting calories with so much gusto, but then "something" happened. I had a set back and I allowed this set back to all but make me quit on my Spark journey completely! Not to mention that on top of that I suffer with major depressive disorder. Which opens another can of worms, along with the symptoms of depression, my medications certainly do not help with weight loss, in fact they often times do the opposite and cause weight gain. I also have PTSD, I take meds for this as well, again causing another layer of decelerated weight loss. But do I want this to define me? HECK NO! I am still trying to figure out why I can be doing really well and then turn around self sabotage. This journey for me is about more than weight loss, it is about self discovery and complete health! Mind, body and soul!


I have been yo-yoing since December 2011 and here it is March 2012, I am 200 pounds (I never thought I would say that out loud), and determined to get to my weight loss goal of 165 pounds!!!!! Thank you to all you wonderful Sparklers! You inspire me! Hugs to all!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIAJOEB 3/8/2012 6:04PM

    Have you also checked out plateau busters blogs and see if there are any plateau or yoyo teams??? i also am ashamed to say that I have been flipping from 175 up to 190 and back down for the last year. The madness must stop.


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LADYJAJA 3/7/2012 3:02PM

  One thing that helps me is to read the blogs of others who have had the same struggles and found ways to overcome their low points (like working out instead of eating out of boredom, for example). I noticed several of the most successful Sparkers didn't do it on their first try. It can take time to change the way we think and live. You already know you can do it, DON'T GIVE UP!

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Twas the Night Before Weigh In

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Twas the night before weigh in, when all through my house...
Not a calorie uncounted for, not even a ounce!

My workout clothes were washed and hung in the bathroom with care...
In hopes for weight loss that would soon be there!

My boys were all in their special place....
While visions of success danced across my face!

And me in my doo-rag and hubby in his hat....
The family settled down, but Oh My, we forgot the cat!

When out in my kitchen there arose such a clatter...
The cookies in the pantry fibbing and saying we won't you fatter!

So I rushed to the dinning room and peeked at the pantry...
Realizing better choices are the way for me!

When what to my wandering mind should appear.....
The weight loss God and his community near!

With a little thought so lively, not dull....
I knew in a moment it must be SparkPeople!

More rapid than weight loss along with exercise
He whistled and shouted for he told me no lies!

Now weight loss, Now life so happy and real....
On water, on blogs, and communities, that's the deal!

To the top of the kitchen, to the top of the wall....
Now pounds, dash away, dash away, dash away all!

Such is this SparkPeople life I've chosen.....
No time to waste, I can't be frozen!

SparkPeople has taught me my choice is a healthy life....
To lose weight, be active, to live without strife!

A change is mine certainly to make....
So tomorrow's weigh in will be a piece of cake!

This night before weigh in doesn't have to be live or die....
Given the right tools, I am able to fly!

So with a wink of his eye and a turn of his head....
I realize the scale I should no longer dread!

He spoke not a word, but gave a wink like a lark....
That's when I knew I was right to Spark!

The weight God sprang out of sight, as he sang such a song.....
I knew right then to be a Sparker was not wrong!

As he flew away deep into the night....
Tomorrow's weigh in would be alright!

Keep Sparking and remember to Believe,
T.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STEVENK87 2/3/2014 12:04PM

    Nice

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HOPEFULHIPPO 11/29/2011 9:55PM

    I love it...just perfect for reading today!

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SPARKLEJUDY 11/29/2011 10:40AM

    I just knew it would be entertaining while being heartfelt! I was right! emoticon

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FENWAYGIRL18 11/29/2011 12:21AM

    emoticon

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My Scale is my Crack!

Monday, November 21, 2011

Can it be that I am addicted to weighing myself? I must say a resounding YES! Logically I know that my weight will fluctuate during the week, and that a once a week weigh in will be the most accurate! Here in lies the crux of the problem....

As I am working around my house I suddenly hear a hypnotic rant, step on me, step on me.... I run to the bedroom I have to weigh, it doesn't matter! Is it possible that my scale is calling to me? I say yes! It is not a small wee voice this scale of mine, no, it is more like that of a roaring giant.

The itch begins, I begin to sweat, the results can very well predicate the type of day I will have. As I approach closer to my scale, I have to wonder, should I undress or bite the bullet? Should I weigh in a different room, perhaps I will weigh less in the kitchen. These thoughts rush through my brain at breakneck speed, no time to waste, the scale is near, Oh my goodness, I am in fear! What if I gained and I didn't lose, or I stayed the same from the hour before? Perhaps the kitchen wasn't the place to be, the bathroom has got to better for me!

Hmmm.... maybe it's not my scale calling me, perhaps my house is haunted! Either that or I am just scared that this will be another failed attempt!

This silly addiction I have, My Scale is my Crack, time for rehab, time to fight back! So I joined SparkPeople, the place to be! It took me some time to realize that it is time for a healthier me.

You see, eating right and exercise, a very good thing, but lifestyle change includes so much more! Healthy choices in all that comes my way, I realize is the only way to play. I still want to weigh more than once a week, but I hold fast to my commitment and have SparkPeople close at hand!

This journey is so amazing, the people so supportive and the friends I have made, all are a help so I will not weigh! I am getting better, at least I think, thank you SparkPeople, it's time for me to go, I gotta weigh myself! Just Kidding, I really am waiting until tomorrow, and that will be a win!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIAJOEB 12/4/2011 9:23PM

    Staying on track is ok, but I had to forse myself not to weigh but once a week. That way I stay on my plan and not say o I did ok today, maybe I can cheat a little or not walk...Ha! it is a slippery slope... You are fun... emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
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Comment edited on: 12/4/2011 9:25:29 PM

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EUTHAJ 11/22/2011 3:26AM

    I weigh my self every morning soooo I get what you are saying....but it helps me stay on track!

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SPARKLEJUDY 11/21/2011 4:30PM

    Teresa, you have such an amazing gift for words and humor! Thanks for the laugh as well as for sharing your heart and struggles. One day at a time, one moment at a time...we'll get there together!!!

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