"Pull the string and it will follow wherever you wish. Push it, and it will go nowhere at all."
Dwight D. Eisenhower
What do you get when you cross a tapeworm and a porcupine?
About 10 feet of barbed wire.
Why did the contortionist retire?
He just couldn't continue to make ends meet.
I smile easily knowing that of all the things I wear, a smile and good humor are the most important.
Why did the elephants get thrown out of the pool?
Because they liked to keep dropping their trunks.