Monday, October 05, 2009
I completed day 1 of 7 and did great. I did some cardio I've never tried before (belly dancing) and stuck to my eating plan 100%! I also officially have lost 10 lbs with SP (20 lbs total loss since this jouney began).
It's getting exciting for me because, as you can probably tell in my pictures, I lose off my chest and stomach first. Now I can start getting my butt and thighs slimmed down. I tried on my goal pants yesterday. I actually got them on! Previously I couldn't even pull them on higher than just above my knee! So, I can totally get them on and button them (though I can't breathe or move LOL). It's pretty exciting, I haven't worn them in nearly 3 years.
Thursday, October 01, 2009
As suggested by the wonderful group Just Do It! Here are my answers for my weakest link www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_mes
1) What is your weakest mental leak? Fear? Guilt? Victimization? Blame? Self-Sabotage? Hesitation? Lack of motivation? Or other attitudes.
My weakest mental link is probably somewhere along the lines of self-loathing. I have always had incredibly low self-esteem so, even if I know I entirely have the ability, there is a block wondering if I should, if I'm worth it, if I'll ever be good enough.
2) How does this play out in keeping you NOT making progress in your life, or not accepting the progress you have made.
I look at myself and think, "Even if I was 125lbs, it wouldn't be good enough, so why bother." Like, everyone else is better looking, better acting and better at this healthy eating thing than I could ever be so why should I even bother to try?
3) How can you ACTIVELY look at this differently. Everything, especially your judgements, can be gifts towards you making your goals.
I honestly don't know how to answer this. Like many of us, my eating, my view of food, has been a lifelong struggle. If it were a quick fix, we wouldn't be here. The only thing I suppose I can do is to shake it off. Perhaps I would benefit from looking in the mirror and finding one thing I love about myself each day, though I think that might be a little difficult.
Monday, September 28, 2009
I was doing so good for about 5 days and then (last night) we went to my parents to celebrate my dad's birthday. We had fried chicken, pasta and pumpkin pie! Needless to say, I went over my calorie goal by 400! I tried so hard but, in the end, the pumpkin pie got me.
Generally, when I "slip" I get pretty down on myself. I had two dreams filled with self-loathing. One in which my husband called my gross to my face and another where my former English teacher laughed at me when I told her I wanted to be a writer, then she told me I was an awful writer.
Today we were running late and decided to get fast food for lunch. There are some places I can go to and do fine but others where it's nearly impossible and my husband picked Jack-in-the-Box because they have these new sandwiches he wanted to try. I just got jalapeņo poppers but they were still 500 calories! I decided that today will be a "free day" to try to fill any void I might be having.
My daughter's birthday party is on Saturday so I know that will probably be a free day too. I wish there was a way to break my sugar addiction. I just have a huge sweet tooth which is most often the cause of my cheats. I also notice that when I drink 11 or 12 glasses of water a day, I have a much easier time than if I only do 8 (or less) so I really have to force myself to keep my water up.
I am fitting into my size 6 pants though. They aren't quite as comfortable as I'd like but I'm getting there. I figure when I lose about 3 more lbs I should start to see more clothes fitting well.
Since June I've lost exactly 19lbs, which is a lot for anyone. Unfortunately, no one has noticed. :( Not that I'm doing this for other people but, hopefully when I lose my last 10lbs, people will notice and tell me I look good.
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