Wednesday, November 13, 2013
This weekend was one of those overly emotional times in a mom's life that can and does lead to unhealthy choices. In my case, it was my youngest daughter turning 16. She had rsvp's from 20 teens who were going to be at our house. She wanted home made mac and cheese and pizza and chips etc. We got gourmet cupcakes (2 dozen). It was all great and good because I had planned my eating for the entire week with the knowledge that I would enjoy a cupcake as well as pizza and a little mac and cheese. What I didn't plan for was only 15 people showing up and there being a ton of left overs.
I froze the pizza and we had the mac and cheese for dinner again the next night. The cupcakes have been a small issue for me, but not too bad. Did I mention that my dear MIL dropped off an entire Birthday Cake as well? . The cake is still sitting on our dining room table (3 days later) unopened. I don't know what to do with it. I know if I cut in to it, I will end up nibbling on it until it is gone. My daughter doesn't seem to want any of it and my husband hasn't touched it either. But, I have done too well to open that "can of worms". So, it may end up in the garbage.
Anyway, this all leads me to my title. Sunday was the party and Monday I had to clean up and deal with all the leftover food. I truly felt like I was hung over. I should have gone to the gym and done a good workout...I would have felt so much better, but I didn't and ended up feeling down in the dumps all day. But on Tuesday, I picked myself up and got back to the gym and felt 200% better. I have no desire to eat the leftover cake....and while I will always want to eat the leftover pizza in the freezer.... I don't desire it enough to take it out and heat it up. I am feeling stronger and happier as the week goes on.
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Slowly, slowly, step by step, I am turning my life around for the better! I have been back exercising for 9 months and actively working hard on myself for 8 months. At first the weight was coming off pretty quickly... but I have hit several plateaus along the way and the loss has slowed to a creep. However, it is creeping in the right direction. I am exercising a minimum of 4 and up to 6 days each week. The past month I have been struggling with the shortening days. I was running 3 days a week early in the morning, but the sun was up early enough that I could get the full hour in. Not lately, and it has affected my schedule. So, this week I am breaking down and moving to the treadmill more days than not:-( Oh well. I am still at it, and that is what matters most.
As the season has changed here in upstate NY, I have found myself digging into the dusty part of my closet where my fall clothes hang and find myself wearing a part of my wardrobe that hasn't seen the light of day in over 5 years. This is the feeling I have craved for the past 9 months. I have a deeper section of the same closet that I hope to be dipping into by Christmas, if I can keep up my progress...
I realize that while the progress is much slower now, I have truly changed my lifestyle and am not dieting. I no longer log everything I eat, but am aware and make sure to balance treats with healthy eating. If I want cake, I eat cake. I just make sure that everything else I eat doesn't add up to an excess of calories for the day. It is working for me and I am now satisfied with slower weight loss. Because I don't ever want to go back to where I was a year ago. This has to be permanent. And this time, I believe it truly is.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
As I was driving to work this morning, I was thinking about the transformation in my mindset over the last 5 months. One of the things that hit me, was the idea of what I really want to eat when I go out to a restaurant.
When I first started logging my food again in January, I was disappointed in the fact that there were foods that I love to order at restaurants that were nearly impossible to fit into my eating plan. One example of this would be the "Honey Barbecue Chicken Super Melt" at Friendly's. Boy do I love that sandwich! But, at 1, 700 calories...(more than an entire day's allotment) it was off my list of possibilities. Even HALF of that sandwich would make it hard to eat well that day. So, I had to find alternatives. At first, I felt sorry for myself as I watched my skinny teenagers eating it, but I managed to get by. We seldom even go to Friendly's now, and when we do, I have a go-to meal I can order. But, that is not really what this blog is about.
What I realized is that the foods I would really like to order at restaurants, I haven't because of price. I actually would rather go to a seafood restaurant and eat Lobster, or sea scallops that are broiled or steamed. Instead of a big juicy burger, I would much rather eat a grilled chicken sandwich. Instead of a giant beef and bean burrito, I would rather have a tofu or chicken "burrito bowl". In most cases, I don't want the french fries....they don't even taste good to me anymore (the one exception being at Five Guys). So, while I might end up spending a little more money, what I really want to eat isn't so bad anymore. I don't really miss the greasy chicken super melt anymore. I get also find myself much more excited about a good fruit plate of melon, strawberries, and pineapple than a brownie too!
To me, this is what is the best part of sticking with a plan for the long-term. These habits didn't change in the matter of a couple of weeks, it has taken 5 months. But, I think I can stick to this much better now that I get more excited about healthy foods than junk foods.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
I can't even begin to explain how good I feel right now! While the weight isn't coming off as quickly as I would desire, I am making huge progress and improvements in how I feel. Four months ago, my knees bothered me when I went down stairs, if I had to kneel down on the floor I had a hard time getting up, I breathed hard just walking on my daughters college campus tours, and I generally felt like a blob. And clothes? Please! It was awful!
In the course of the last 3 months I have lost 27 pounds and can now jog 4 miles (albeit slow) and today I had to incorporate huge nasty hills into my walking route in order to get my heart rate up high enough. I did this by choice! And I feel awesome! at 217 pounds, I can't believe I am saying that I feel awesome. As I lose more weight, how much better will I feel?!!!! I can not imagine.
But here is the thing, I have been on this journey my entire life. I have lost and regained the same weight several times and each time I have said that it was the last time and I would never gain it back. But I did. And this last time I got to a weight that was unfathomable before. So how is this time different? I am more driven. I want it more because I am not doing it to please my husband(even though it does)...I am not doing it to look good (but I will)... I am doing it because I want to FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS! I want to be able to hike, bike, play, walk...do anything I desire to do. And I wasn't able to do it at such a high weight. Another reason why it will work this time is my kids are now older. One is in college already, another is about to go off to college in the fall, and one will still be at home and in high school, but she is able to be supportive of me and allow me to spend time and energy on myself. I can finally feel ok with putting my needs as a priority over those of others. And, therefore, I will succeed this time.
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