TREA241   13,711
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TREA241's Recent Blog Entries

"I like to dance all night, and some of the day."

Friday, January 30, 2009

To My Dad:

I drink a smoothie every morning,
and listen to Kenny Loggins every night.

I run to keep in shape,
and swim to strengthen my mind.

I sleep on my stomach,
and wake up on the other side.

I love Doritos,
and still hate brussel sprouts.

I dance like Carlton on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air,
and I sing like the losers on American Idol.

I match my underwear to my shirt,
and always wear two different socks.

I would rather text than talk on the phone,
and would rather email than text.

I am a Democrat,
and disagree with your beliefs.

I read for fun,
and write for sanity.

I cook like Mom,
and sew like you.

You knew me with curls,
and my hair has now gone straight.

I just want you to know,
the girl you have let go.

I want you to walk me down the isle,
but not just for show.

You are still my Tato,
the best man I will ever know.

But please do not forget,
to never let me go.

I love you, Dad.


(My dad has recently gotten a new girlfriend. Not that I don't like her, she is awesome; however, he is letting his old life go and beginning a new one. I just want him to know that I am still his daughter, always will be.)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ELFITZPA 1/30/2009 10:54AM

    Wow, that was really sweet. And I'm sure he appreciates how you open you are to his new girlfriend - that's got to be a potentially tough situation but it sounds like you're dealing with incrdibly maturity and selflessness.

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How My Car Accident Changed My Life

Sunday, January 18, 2009

2008 was a horrible year for me. I got into a really bad car accident at the end of the year. I am SO grateful that I was alright. I ended up with a concussion and a broken rib in my bac, but the way my car was hit, I was suprised I didn't fly through the windshield and die.

I was living a pretty self-destructive life before that accident. Emotional eating, not working out, finding excuses FOR everything, not just working out, but for not doing the dishes, not cleaning, not going to work. I was really driving myself into a dark, deep hole.

But the accident opened my eyes. With all my loved ones around me at the hospital, I realized that I am loved. I am loved immensly. I then decided that I should love myself just as those around me love me. That means taking care of myself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. That is why 2009 is a new year for me. It is hard to break old habits, though, so the beginning has been kind of rough, but I am working on it.

My boyfriend and a bunch of friends are going to Bonaroo in June, so I would like to have lost at least 30 lbs by then, but mostly I want to be comfortable in my own skin. I do not want to look in the mirror and say nasty things, I want to go to the mall and not leave crying because I hate ALL clothes. It is going to be hot, so I want to be able to wear tank tops and such and not feel so self conscious. It will ruin my time if I am worried about how I look the whole time.

I am on the road to recovery and I couldn't be more happy about it. (Even though some days are extremely tough, I am stronger than I think.)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARBARA_BOO 1/19/2009 4:29PM

    I hadn't heard about your accident. I'm so glad you survived. Things like that are very scary, but the good thing is that they usually cause us to evaluate our lives and set some personal goals, like you have done. Your trip will be a wonderful reward for the work you are doing.

My SparkPeople calendar for today, in case you don't have one, features a quote you may find inspiring on those tough days: "You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however."--Richard Bach

Congrats on discovering how strong you are. It will be great to see pictures of you in your tank tops. Good luck!


emoticon

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Vicious Cycle

Thursday, August 21, 2008

I feel like I keep going in this huge circle with my weight loss. I get into the groove of good working out and eating, then I just lose it. I know that I have the wrong approach to my weightloss. I want to lose weight so I am more attractive, not because it will make me healthier and live a longer life.

I just don't know how to change my thinking... I mean for SO long to think that skinny = beautiful even though conciously I know that is not true.

How do I reprogram my thinking? How do I change my habits for a healthier lifestyle rather than a short bout of weight loss?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MANYPOUNDSTOGO 8/23/2008 9:18PM

    I find it very hard to change programmed thinking but with persistance it can be done. You can do this. Give yourself some slack ... you are human and can not be perfect all the time!!

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OCALAWRITER 8/22/2008 8:34PM

    I really don't think that using physical appearance as motivation is a bad thing, but make sure you don't confuse wanting to look thin vs look healthy.

The average woman isn't anywhere near as starved and unnaturally thin as many women in the eye of the media these days. You can not use that as a bookmark of what 'you're supposed to look like'. It's simply not true, and it's a lie sold to us by media and advertsising.

If you concentrate on eating healthy and exercising regularly, your body will go autopilot to it's pre-set amounts (unless perhaps underlying other factors). But generally speaking, live a healthy life and your body will be healthy.

Find role-models that you admire that aren't sticks - look at athletes, for example, or even people you know that live pretty healthy lifestyles. Most of them are not going to look stick thin (or be 5'10" for that matter).

I believe in you, girl. Believe in yourself and your inner worth and you can do anything you set your mind to.

~~BEST!!~~
Diana

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KRICKIT72509 8/21/2008 4:52PM

    Hey there!

I hear you - I used to SAY I wanted to lose weight for health reasons, but really I wanted to just so that I would be seen as prettier or whatever.. Over time, though, my ideas of "pretty" and "healthy" became one and the same! If you look at two thin women, but one is very skinny and sort of gaunt looking, then you look at another who is very toned and in shape, but has a healthy glow to her skin and beautiful smile on... now what do you think?? I think you just have to see that healthy IS pretty and healthy IS attractive! You dont want to be UNhealthy skinny, you want to be HEALTHY thin and toned and in shape, right?? Just by virtue of being healthy through good clean eating and frequent exercise, you will become that more toned and in-shape woman you want to be! So just remember.. healthy = attractive and attractive = healthy! THEN, you can honestly say that you are doing this to be healthy.. because you really will be, only you will gain more from it than just looking better -- youll add not only years to your life, but QUALITY too!! Do it for YOU, for a healthy, happy YOU!! :-) :-) :-)

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Broken Scale

Wednesday, July 30, 2008


So- I just found out that the scale at my mom's house (the one I use for my weekly weight in) is broken! It is about 8 or 9 pounds off. Therefore, that means I do not weight 167. I weigh 175. That is the heaviest I have ever been!

I know that I should not look at this as a failure, and use it as an opportunity to get my butt back in gear, but I can't help feel like crap. I haven't been showing an progress and at the end of the day I gained 7 pounds.

Where do I go from here? I wish I still looked like my picture. I guess now that is something to strive for.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OCALAWRITER 8/3/2008 7:56PM

    Forget about the scale. Measure your success towards healthy living in the small things you do RIGHT. Your goal is to eat healthier, so make healthy eating decisions. Walk a little more...or turn on some music and DANCE whenever you can. Every little bit adds up over time and you WILL get back to where you want to be!

And never forget, you are not your weight. The beautiful person we are on the inside doesn't gain or lose weight - she is the same strong woman no matter what!

~~you can do it~~
Diana emoticon

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KRISHARPER 8/1/2008 4:35AM

    Scales! Ugh. As someone told me when I complained about the different scales (mine, and 2 different doctors offices - they were all different) was to stick with one scale and only use that one to meausre by.

Never Give Up, Never Surrender!

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MARINEMAMA 7/30/2008 7:27PM

    I think we should ban the SCALE!!! It only brings us down. It rules us because of what it tells us. You are an absolutely gorgeous young lady..no matter what that scale reads. How about inches...have you measured yourself to see if you have lost??? clothes fitting better?...the scale is not the only way to tell if your body is changing. Take a deep breathe....exhale.... and repeat. emoticon Dust yourself off girl....You can do whatever you put your mind to. As I tell my boys...the only person standing in your way...is you. You don't need to beating yourself up...YOU need to being your own biggest cheerleader...Because you are a star!!! You can do it beautiful...I am cheering for you every step of the way!! Positive=Positive... emoticon

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Swimming Withdrawals

Monday, June 16, 2008


I have been a swimmer I was about 3 years old. My older brother was on the swim team and my mom would always take me to practices. She said that I got too annoying so she finally threw me in the water with the 5 year old. Well, good thing she did because I wouldn't know what to do without swimming.

It is kind of my escape. No one can hear my thoughts when I am swimming (not they can anyways, but its a metaphor). However, when I swam competitively in high school I could eat anything I wanted because I was burning about 1500 calories in every practice. I also needed to the carbs and things to keep my energy and stamina up. However, I tore my ACL as a senior in high school (playing soccer) and haven't gotten back in the pool since.

I guess my problem is that I think I can still eat all those carbs (I admit that I love them!) and not exercise as much as I used to. I was talking to my grandpa the other day about how much I miss swimming and when I actually get in the water I will be discouraged by how slow I go. Then he said "Are you going slow only because you have gotten fat?" Now he is 90 and not yet senile, but that hurt my feelings. Yes I have gained about 30 pounds in 3 years, but I am trying.

I guess I am just discouraged. I miss the escape of swimming, but I don't want to see myself in a swim suit, let alone struggle through a workout. I'm just not sure what to do.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TMILLER88 6/25/2008 7:24AM

    They both have a good point. :)

I know what you mean though about going and feeling that way. I would love to go swim laps at our pool here and whatnot, but I always feel like it would seem just a bit awkward bc all the kids are playing and ...yeah, you know what I mean.

Hopefully you can get some swimming in...Go for it, girl! :)

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LILLIAN364 6/16/2008 6:54PM

    Great idea. When the moms and little kids are in the pool, no one will see you. The kids will be having a good time and the moms will be too busy watching their kids to see you. emoticon

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DEFLO31313 6/16/2008 6:04PM

    Then don't look in a mirror. That is one of the best execrises that we can do. It will help all around if you take the 1st step.
Go earlier in the day. When only moms and little kids go if you feel uncomfortable. Just go ,If you were in my area we could go together. I hope you give it a shot, Let us know if you do. emoticon

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