Thursday, April 03, 2014
I haven't had a chance to blog in a couple of days, not by choice, more just that I am always keeping busy and the past couple of days I had some stuff thrown my way and just kept throwing me off. Last night I didn't sit down until 9pm and I was exhausted, both physically and mentally! Now I still have to play catch up on cleaning, but wanted to blog first. Priorities!
So, I have been officially done with my Whole30 for a few days now, but nothing has really changed. I did eat my 90% chocolate the other night, but ended up taking one bite and tossing the rest. It is too bitter for me. I guess I will try the 72% one, but I haven't felt the itch to run out and get it, so obviously it isn't that high on my needs list. I did have another small run in with those cashews again, again nothing like what it used to be, just enough for me to know that I just can't have them at all. I should just try to convince myself they are off program. My husband likes to eat them and buys the big thing from Costco. I think I am going to ask him to put them in the cupboard that I can't reach at all. It really is the only problem that I seem to have. The rest of the day, I do pick at foods sometimes, but they are carrot sticks and grape tomatoes and sometimes if we have it, frozen mango (I LOVE this snack!) Some people would feel good about the path that I have taken, but I must say it is a little scary to me. I am a bit scared about reintroducing sweet snacks/treats. I just don't feel confident that I have it in me to just eat whatever the serving is without it sending me into a binge. I am debating this all the time in my head. I am not sure if I should just stay away for a bit more or if I should just jump in and learn how to eat just a serving and leave it alone. I wish that these past thirty days cured my sugar/food addiction. It seems weird to me that I have a fear of sugar. My son has been begging me to make these Lemon Meringues this week and I finally have all the ingredients. I can make them and pretty easily eat none, but once I eat one, it seems to snowball from there. That is the part that bugs me. It is just like the cashews!
On the fitness part of my journey, I didn't mention much in the month of March. I was pretty faithful to my schedule with weight training. For the most part last month had no cardio in it. Though the weight routine I use does leave me sweaty and with a slightly elevated heart rate, but not cardio. I decided that this month I am going to start adding in a couple of SLOW walks. I mean slow, like Samuel pace slow, a couple of times a week. I want to see where my limits are with my knees. Who knows maybe I will be able to build up to a couple of short runs each week again, maybe I just need to ease into it. This month I am still using the same weight routine, but I am either upping the weights, or upping the reps. Some things with my shoulder I just can't use a heavier weight yet.
Well, I am off to play catch up on all my cleaning that I wasn't able to get to the past couple of days. I hope that everyone has a wonderful day!
Monday, March 31, 2014
So, yesterday was the last day of my Whole30, though as I have mentioned, nothing is really changing in my life right now. I am in a very comfortable place and very content and happy. So, I thought I would start this blog by going back to the ways I was gauging my month of Whole30. I decided that I was NOT going to weigh in (though I have a number from March 5th and will be going back in mid April for a recheck so will update when I go, just so anyone who wants to know will know, though I am curious, but not as much as I used to be). I was going to do measurements, and decided against that as well. I was using other indicators. Here is what I used.
Hair :THEN: right now it is dry and very fly away. It isn't very shiny either.
NOWr: my hair is growing faster I swear. It is not dry anymore at all. It is shiny and more manageable. I don't have fly aways as much.
Nails: THEN: grow very slowly, and kinda brittle, though they have been worse.
NOW: they are growing faster as well (though I can't stop picking at them again). The whites are white until I pick them off and they seem stronger.
Skin:THEN: kinda dry everywhere, especially my hands. I also keep fighting chapping on the back of my thighs. I have cracks on my finger tips near my nails as well.
NOW: still dryness on hands and feet, but that is all. those darn cracks keep coming back, but my other skin seems awesome. Soft and clearer than ever. I used to have these little fine red lines on my cheekbones, I only have a couple of them left and you can barely notice them.
Body: THEN: knees are achy on a daily basis, as are feet and shoulder. Some days are better than others, but no patterns to them.
NOW: nothing is achy anymore, aside from my bad shoulder. My knee has been babied since I hurt it, but I don't have the chronic aches that I have had in the past...um forever! The aches in my feet are gone!
Sleep: THEN: I sleep well, but would like to get a little bit more. I get about 6-8 a night.
NOW: I am getting 7-8 hours now. I sleep a million times better now. I go go go all day long and then 9pm comes around and I am ready for bed. I go to bed and fall asleep within 30 minutes, which that part used to take about 90 minutes!
Feelings: THEN: for the most part I am content, I have days that are stressful, happy, sad, frustrated....I don't think anything is more or less than normal levels
NOW: I still have all feelings as above, but I am definitely happier and more easier going, go with the flow. I notice that I don't let the stress aggravate me as much as it used to. I don't let my feelings guide me towards food either. My feelings towards food has done a 180! I don't dwell on it like I used to. It is weird because I think about it just as much, but not in a destructive manner like I used to. I view it completely differently.
Energy: THEN: this is very up and down. There are days that I have more energy than others. I also have many periods through the day of being exhausted, like I would be able to sleep for hours if allowed. I am tired at the end of the night but still can't fall right asleep.
NOW: Big changes here. My energy levels have leveled out through the days. I have had a couple of days that I felt a little tired during the day, but it goes quickly and it only happened a couple of times. I am noticing that I can't seem to sit still very long until I go find another something to do. I am always finding ways to keep busy. I have so much energy it is crazy. I also notice that I am more focused as well. I am more organized and don't feel so scatterbrained at times.
Overall I have to say this plan is exactly where I needed to be. I searched for almost a year an a half on how to eat like a normal person and the answers never came to me. It was frustrating and at times I felt like I was destined to be obese. When I started looking at sugar addiction and such, it dawned on me that I am never going to be a normal person around food. I needed to make a change and one that was going to work for me long term. I am so thankful I found Whole30, it has changed my life in 30 days. And I was scared and overwhelmed when I began, but I put my FULL trust in this program, which wasn't easy since it went against so many things I had learned before. But I trusted anyhow and went with it. I also said to myself that I can do it for just 30 days, if it wasn't for me, so be it, but at least again, I wasn't giving up.
I do plan on blogging more, not sure if it will be daily, but it will be a few times a week probably. I do like writing and it is an outlet for me. Thanks to everyone who has read, commented and supported me on this journey!
Breakfast: 3 scrambled eggs with onions and spinach. pear with cinnamon
Lunch: lazy stuffed cabbage without rice YUMMMMM
Snack: some veggies
Dinner: Flank steak with avocado salsa and cilantro riced cauliflower....yum, yum and more yum. What a way to end my Whole30!
Have a great day!
Sunday, March 30, 2014
Here I am beginning the last day of my Whole30. I am sure it won't really be my last. Not much is going to change for me from what I have done in these past thirty days....other than tomorrow I am going to sit and have a square of dark chocolate and have never been more excited about a piece of chocolate in my entire life. I am more excited right now about taking what I have learned and applying to not only my life, but my family's life and diet. I know that I can't expect results from them as I have done. But my goal is to end the year with them eating more Paleo/primal meals and snacks than they do now. Especially Samuel. He should be fairly easy to switch, the beginning may be tough cuz he loves sugar. He loves fruit snacks, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and cheez-its. But, I am thinking that I am going to involve him in preparing meals/snacks and then maybe he will be more apt to try them. Plus in the long run, I am in charge of what he eats, and there may be days of him not being happy with his choices, but he will forget about things eventually as well. I hope to end the year with my husband and Samuel eating 80/20 Paleo. My two teenagers are another story. They think their mom has gone "crunchy earthy granola" on them and soon will be dressing like a flower child or something. Anyhow, my plan with them is to make snacks and foods they don't really know are Paleo and just go from there. I hope they can end the year eating more healthy than not. Teenagers are tough. When I tell my kids the things I learn about, they literally tell me "I DO NOT CARE! I want to eat the food that tastes good. I don't care if there are things in there that can harm me or that make me addicted to more." So, I pass along information to them and leave it at that. Someday maybe they will care. I will lead by example with them.
So, to begin this transformation, this week I am making all Paleo friendly meals, though there are days that my family may have a non Paleo item or two in their meal. Tonight I am making flank steak with a homemade rub, "rice" cauliflower and I am having sweet potatoes, they are having rice. I am going to give a small amount of the sweet potato to each of them, just to try. Can't hurt. I am also going to be making a flourless banana bread and homemade gummy fruit snacks. They won't know any better until they try it anyhow and maybe they will like it. My guess is, it may be too bland for them since they are still used to the regular stuff, I will probably love it, but if that is their choices they will probably come around. I am also making these meringues this week that have a lemon topping on them, my son saw me looking at the recipe and asked me to make them, shhhhh don't tell him they are Paleo.
I plan on continuing to blog. It is a great outlet for me. I love to write, even though I am not great at it, but I love that I have a place to put my thoughts and a place where I can go to look back at things that I tried and worked or didn't work. I don't think I will keep posting my meals though. I think it will be good for me that if I ever need to do another Whole30 I can look back at things I ate and liked. I will probably post about the foods I make and like just not in the menu format. I think we all know chances are I will eat eggs for breakfast, probably with spinach and onions lol. I am a creature of habits! Plus I really enjoy eggs. I was never a waffle/muffin/pancake/cereal girl. I do LOVE bagels, but I haven't really had them much over the past two and a half years. They are something that if I am really wanting one, I will treat myself and move on. I am aiming for a 90/10 plan for myself, but I am not going to track it either.
Yesterday I went on Pinterest (my biggest addiction besides food) and I am not kidding. I can't seem to stay off of there and now that I am eating this new way, I am on there even more. It is funny, I have been on there for over a year now total, and I had 60 something dinner recipes pinned. I have been looking at Whole30/Paleo stuff for a month and already have almost doubled that number. I honestly think it is because I am putting things that I LOVE back in my life without that guilty feelings. Can you imagine eating a sweet potato or an avocado and feeling guilty? I did with so many foods. Now I am having them and they all appeal to me. I think that is why my sugar cravings are so little now. Anyhow, I did find a brownie recipe and even a peanut butter cheesecake recipe. I am going to be combining those two recipes to make my birthday treat towards the end of the month.
So, I am off to make some foods and then to watch my beloved Huskies march on to the Final Four, at least I hope they do! Here is the second to last menu I will post! Enjoy your Sunday!
Breakfast 9am: 3 scrambled eggs with onion and spinach. pear sprinkled with cinnamon
Lunch 1pm: baba ganoush with veggies. turkey and avocado wrapped in romaine
Dinner 6pm: roasted sweet potato, onion and sausage hash. salad with mashed avocado and a hard boiled egg
Snack 830pm: 2 small handfuls of cashews....it was hard to stop eating them though, but I did!
Saturday, March 29, 2014
I have been crazy busy in the past couple of days. The days I watch my niece it seems like my time flies and on Fridays my time flies even faster. I have decided that Friday is my shopping day from now on, so that is where I spend 1.5 hours doing while Samuel is in school. It saves me a lot of stress! First off cuz Samuel is not running with me and secondly and probably more important, the stores are far less crowded. There is nothing worse than a Saturday morning at Costco! I have my niece one day a week, alternating Wednesdays and Fridays, so now I see how busy that day really is. Next time I have her on a Friday I am going to try to have a crockpot meal that I can prepare before Samuel goes to school so I don't need to worry about dinner. I also made a snack to bring to my parents house last night. They always have something made when we go there to watch the UConn games (GO HUSKIES!!! Down to the Elite Eight now!). The time before last it was some delicious looking dip and chips/pita chips/crackers. My dad takes things really personally when you don't eat the food he makes. He LOVES to cook, basically as much as I LOVE to bake, but I don't take it personally if people don't want to eat what I made. So, I took some time to explain to them what I was doing, only to be met with negativity. I am used to this, it doesn't matter what I do, they will find something wrong with it. If I went next week and said what they said that day, they would disagree too. Anyhow, the next time I went, they had a whole platter of fried foods, chicken strips, mozzarella sticks and a bunch of fried veggies. They figured I would eat the chicken and the veggies. I didn't even want to explain why this wasn't really something I should eat either, it had breading and I am sure was fried in an unacceptable oil. But I didn't want to explain, so I took a few pieces of the veggies and a piece of the chicken and very discreetly took the breading off and picked at enough to make him happy. This week, he offered to make steamers, so that is okay. I decided since I don't really like them to make a veggie platter and my first attempt at baba ganoush. I really liked it and it totally hit the spot that I feel is missing with my hummus! Hummus and veggies were a regular snack for me before Whole30. So, this was great. The only thing I would do differently next time is roast the garlic as well. I used raw garlic and it was very strong in the dip, not that it stopped me from eating it. My dad didn't care for it but my Mom loved it and even asked to take some for herself and to let my brother try as well. Which is fine since the batch it made was pretty good sized and they say it only keeps for 5 days, I would never finish it in five days. I don't think anyone else will like it in my house. Samuel (who LOVES hummus) didn't like it. James wouldn't even try it and I am pretty sure Jim and Kaleigh will be out too.
I woke up this morning thinking today was the 30th and the end of my first Whole30. Then realized it was only the 29th. I have come up with a plan for April. Originally I was going to be making my most favorite dessert for my birthday towards the end of the month, but am not having huge second thoughts about that. I am in a new Paleo group on FB and the sugar addiction issue was brought up and many people who had serious food issues and sugar addictions said they had introduced a small treat back in and it caused a slide back for them. I certainly don't want that to happen to me and I know that sugar is a big trigger for me. So, I am going to play around with stuff in April and see if I can't come up with an alternative to my favorite, Brownie Bottomed Peanut Butter Cheesecake. I am sure I can Paleo-fy it somehow! So, my plan for April is:
1. Making a Paleo treat once a week. Mostly the ones I will start with will have no flour in them at all since I have to go on a search for coconut flour. A lot of Paleo recipes call for almond flour and with my allergies I can't have it. I am also not telling family it is Paleo, so I get honest reactions out of them. I have a feeling they will complain that the things are not sweet enough. I think for me they will be amazing since I have done 30 days with no sugar. I think when I make something and add a small amount of honey or maple syrup, I will find it delectable!
2. Starting to walk again. I have taken most of this month off now. I haven't had any knee issues since the second time. It is getting nice enough to walk outside. I have decided that I will literally go back to the beginning with this part and see what happens. Maybe when I build up the muscles again, I will at least be able to run a couple of days a week for some shorter distances.
3. Will continue with the strength training plan I am using now. I do a full body circuit two times a week and then a back/bicep/leg/ab one day a week and a tricep/shoulder/chest/ab day one day a week. Next month I am going to up the weight amount on some things and on the ones I can't use more weight because of my shoulder, I am going to add more reps.
4. Only one reintroduction: cheese/dairy. I do like to have feta on my salad now and then. So, this will be the only thing I bring back right now. I can say I really don't miss much from what I was eating before. Occasionally I miss my morning oatmeal, but not that much. I did miss hummus, but now have a sub for that. There is no way I am bringing back grains or sugar (other than the occasional natural ones in my weekly treats) into my life.
Though I will admit one of the things I am definitely going to indulge in the day after I am done is a small square of 90% dark chocolate. I have been thinking about it for a few days now. In the past I wouldn't eat anything over 60%, but I have a feeling that the higher one will be just fine for me since I am so used to nothing now. I mean look at my love for coffee by adding coconut oil and blending it and I am just as happy as I was with the 1 Splenda in it.
I hope that you all have a great weekend! I know I am, tomorrow my Huskies play again to try to get to the Final Four! Woohoo! Here are my past two days of meals since I wasn't able to blog on Friday!
Breakfast 8am: 3 eggs scrambled with spinach onion. apple sprinkled with cinnamon
Lunch 1230pm: turkey burger stuffed with avocado topped with onions. red pepper slices
Snack 330pm: 1 banana and .5 cup strawberries frozen and blended in food processor. Favorite snack to date!
Dinner 630pm: huge green salad with tomatoes, olives, hard boiled egg and coconut crusted chicken. 1/2 smashed sweet potato in frying pan with coconut oil
Breakfast: 3 scrambled eggs with spinach and onion. apple sprinkled with cinnamon
Lunch: left over garlic shrimp over spaghetti squash. red pepper slices
Snack: Banana Berry "ice cream" again
Dinner: lots of veggies with baba ganoush. steamers
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Why it is so easy to forget how easily the feelings you get from overeating makes you feel? You feel so crappy, not only physically but mentally as well. The mental feelings even outweighed the physical ones for me. I know for me, I would feel that way and say OH NO MORE! This is the last time for this binging crap. I hate feeling this way. But that never happened. I would wake up the next day and be binging again less than 24 hours from vowing I wouldn't do it again. Heck there were times that I would start a whole new binge that day!
Yesterday I had a really good day. I was happy because I didn't have any lingering guilt about the episode with the cashews from the day before. I ate really good food and didn't find myself craving anything differently. Even when more drama with my daughter started, it didn't even cross my mind. It made me think last night why are some days so easy and others are so hard. For me there never has seem to be a pattern. There were days I binged because I was stressed, but just as many that I binged out of boredom and just as many I just felt like I needed those foods.
We remember negative feelings about other parts of our lives. When someone breaks our trust, we feel that for awhile, it is hard to build that trust back with that person, because we remember the hurt feelings. The other part that confuses me is that my bad feelings totally outweighed the good feelings the food brought me. In matter of fact the good feelings were very short lived when I would start eating. Before I knew it, the guilty feelings would set in and then I guess I kept eating trying to get that moment or two of happiness that the food brought back. I sure wish the crappy feelings stuck in my head longer than they do.
I am glad that I had a good day though. This is the longest I have gone in a long time without binging and I want that trend to continue. I also think that the experience with the cashews may happen again, but maybe I need them to see that one little step off the path doesn't mean that I need to continue down that path, I only need to take one step back and I will be on the proper path for me again. So, onward with this Whole30 we go!
Breakfast 8am: 3 eggs scrambled with onion, spinach and mushrooms. 1/2 sweet potato mashed into coconut oil
Lunch 1pm: 2 pieces of bacon, turkey, 1/4 avocado wrapped in romaine lettuce leaves. Mango (I am pretty sure mango is my most favorite fruit ever....today I had it frozen, slightly thawed, it was sooooo delish!)
Dinner 6pm: OH MY YUMMMMM....turkey burger stuffed with avocado and a little bacon topped with cooked onions, 1/2 sweet potato made into fries, small salad
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