Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Yesterday I was going over to my friend Cathees house and stopped on the way for a soda..but my debit card kept getting rejected. After four times, I didnt have any cash so I apologized and went over by the slot machines to call my bank and see what was the dealio.
They transferred me to the fraud department and said that there has been suspicious activity on my account. Apparently someone withdrew $300, then $200 dollars Monday in Receda CA. Then yesterday they did a inquiry, saw I was -250 or so and withdrew ANOTHER 300!
I only had 260 in my account. But it was 260 I had been saving since AUGUST! Im a server and lately, I am scraping by, literally. Have to work extra just to pay bills, not affording groceries, gas nothing.
I have been saving my leftover ones every night in a cherry jar above my fridge. I finally saved 300 dollars since august. I had spent forty on small things for people for christmas...and the rest is just....gone.
Who would do such a thing? The bank is going to investigate and hopefully have my money back by the end of December, but Christmas is ruined as far as my buying people gifts.
I am so lucky to have family and friends who understand. For me, Christmas shopping is my favorite thing of the year. I LOVE taking my time and finding just the right gift for each person on my list, I love to shop but never do it for myself. It is so nice to feel able to spend a bit and shop around for other people, and taking that away from me is such a crappy thing. I hope that makes sense.
I just dont get it...WHY?!
I swear when it seems things cant get worse...boy howdy they can.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Last night I went a lil over in calories, but for the week I am way evened out, averaging only 1550 a day. It is usually pretty easy cause I cook at home every night and make stuff that is super low cal so even if I want thirds, I can.
Today the "boys" (some of our guy friends) came over and even though I made soup, Cody decided we should go get pizza. I said I didnt want to go but he wanted me to, even just for a salad. I didnt mind, I miss my friends and have been kinda introverted the past few weeks.
But it was so HARD! We had chicago stuffed pizza and breadsticks and chicken fingers..OMG. I wanted some soo bad. I had an antipasto salad that was pretty good, and filling...but man i wanted some of that cheesy stuffed pizza so bad. :(
I had a NIBBLE of a chicken finger, and of a breadstick. I was going to take a nibble of codys pizza, but then it had sausage on it and im allergic to fennel so NM. Which was good. In my head I kept thinking, it wouldnt hurt to just have a piece, just one piece...blah blah. BUT NO! I know it seems in the short run I can and it will be fine but I am just setting myself up for failure and to keep cheating and going over!!
So I said NO. And I was really proud of myself when we left. I came home, and now I can have some leftover soup or mexican chicken with rice, and be happy.
So yeah...usually it is not that bad and I dont have a hard time being good...but damn, today was a challenge.
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
I have been having weird dreams about food the past two nights...wtf?! I keep dreaming I have nothing to eat but crap and I am just going over and over my calories and I dont want to...so frickin weird.
I mean, they arent just food dreams, they come in in some other dream. But I feel guilty in my dreams, even when in reality I havent gone over!
I guess it makes sense, since I can never have sexy dreams cause I always leave the scenario rto shave my legs or something. Maybe I am too proper for my own good about some stuff.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Well, I am not doing atkins anymore. I am tired of feeling like I have nothing to eat, nothing to snack on and feeling hungry all the time. I only eat salads and chicken when im on it, and I have to limit my veggies, because so many are high carb...my boyfriend is in sports and knows how to eat healthy and I would rather feel like that. I would rather do brown rice and veggies, fruits and stuff than just salad and eggs. :D
I dont know, it just isnt for me anymore.
God I look so horrible in my Thanksgiving pics...more the reason I want to be motivated!!!!
:( I pigged otu yesterday...not TERRIBLY..but I did have about three pieces of the pumpkin pie cheesecake I made..and I made oreo truffles...THEY WERE AWESOME!!! >.> Yeah I grubbed.
I feel much better that I made this decision on the way to lose the weight, and Cody just gave me a big kiss when I told him, he was really worried about me on the atkins.
So yeah wish me luck!
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