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My Moment!

Saturday, October 19, 2013

I’d like to believe that in this journey of trying to lose weight, as time goes on we all hope to run into that one Girlfriend/Boyfriend/Spouse that just couldn’t accept us for who we were for whatever reason. This past week was ‘MY MOMENT’. Let me explain....

Now as I have mentioned in one or two of my blog posts that I have an Ex-Wife (of which I have a Daughter with and for the purpose of the blog I’m only going to refer to her as My Wife) and a recent Ex-Girlfriend. Well My Wife and I don’t really get along so much but we do our best to be civil to each other. Those days are, (as they come around in the year) My Birthday, Her Birthday, Our Wedding Anniversary, & Our Daughter’s Birthday. Well earlier this week I was out at the market doing shopping with My Daughter when we both noticed My Ex-Girlfriend was trying to follow us (but acting as if she wasn’t following us.) My Daughter pointed it that we had a ‘follower’ (trying to put it as if it was on twitter or something) I told her that I knew and that I noticed it sometime ago. My Daughter asked how was I going to handle it. I told her that it will be dealt with only if it needs to be. Eventually my Ex worked up the nerve to come over and speak to me. We started out simple saying hi to each other and such then she said “You look great, you seemed to have lost a lot of weight.” I told her that I did and that as of this past Sunday I lost just over 160 pounds, Dropped about 4 T-Shirt sizes and can actually wear my Daughter’s Gym Shirts if I ever need too (Not that I would normally, I recently tried with an older Gym Shirt of hers (that way if I tore it, it wouldn’t be any great loss) just to see what shirt size I was and I was able to fit fine in her shirts. (I have went from 6X Shirts to 2X Shirts and still plenty more to lose.) My Ex-Girlfriend was in awe and asked what was I doing that night because she wanted to get together try to work out some of our issues and hope she can start things up between us again. My answer to this was “Really? Well funny you should ask that because tonight is the Ex-Wife’s and my Wedding Anniversary which if you would remember is one of the few nights out of the year we avoid trying to shoot each other (ok, maybe I’m stretching it a bit on the shooting part, but you know what I mean LOL!) and try to be civil to each other for Our Daughter’s sake. So we (referring to My Daughter & Me) are here to shop and look for ideas for dinner tonight for when the wife stops by to visit with Our Daughter.” My Ex-Girlfriend acted as if she was hurt. Then I added “You know, if things wasn’t how it was between us (please refer to my earlier blogs) I would probably offer to visit with you over this coming weekend. But you had a hard time accepting who I was, and probably still have a hard time accepting me because deep down I’m still who I was back when we were dating, just 160 pounds lighter is all. Plus don’t even get me started about all of your cheating issues.” It was as if I gave her some sort of crushing blow or something as I said good bye to her and walked away My Daughter had to put her 2 cents in and said “You know I don’t like my Mom. But I would rather see My Dad work things out with My Mom than have him deal with you again, I hope that gives you an idea of how I feel about things.” of course I had to speak to My Daughter about her comment and that personally I think she should have stayed out of it. But she has always had an issue of staying out of things that involves people she cares about.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HAPPY-DESTINY 10/28/2013 12:23AM

    I like the expression of.." Don't spend your time looking for the perfect woman.. do your best at being the perfect man!"

I loved your daughters reply. It's so refreshing that your daughter stood up for herself AND for her Dad!

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ADAPTOR 10/23/2013 1:13PM

    Well done

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MKMMARTY 10/23/2013 9:51AM

    That was a good read - I will have to browse your other blogs.

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PATTYR81 10/21/2013 9:54AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon on your weight loss!!!! emoticon

and I LOVE how you had the courage to nicely, but firmly call out your xgf's bad behavior! emoticon

I'm working on having the self esteem enough to do that instead of 'eating' all their b.s. emoticon


PS: I also like to try on my dd's shirts to see if they fit yet. Someone remarked that I was weird to do that, but to me, it's a REAL accomplishment and a measure of how 'normal' I look now. My dd's are all college athletes on athletic scholarships and are MY role models :) Even tho my body is 103 lbs smaller, my mind still looks for the 'rest' of me emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/21/2013 9:58:36 AM

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TIMOTHYNOHE 10/20/2013 11:58PM


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LOVINGAFRICA 10/20/2013 2:43AM

    You are looking GOOD! And winning on all levels.
Well done!
You deserve someone amazing. Hope you find her soon.

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REDUCE4LIFE 10/19/2013 11:57AM

  Far Freaking Out on the weight loss! As you keep peeling away the layers your self esteem will keep growing and you will know deep in your gut you deserve a good woman. Have a awesome weekend!

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JIBBIE49 10/19/2013 1:15AM

    I love that you are down 160#. That is fantastic. I'm a person who believes in being single and doing for yourself, since I made the mistake of staying in a marriage for these past 45 years. Not smart. The world is full of people and statistics say that we have six "Soulmates" out in the world, but you just have to keep looking until you find one of them.

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FITFRIT 10/19/2013 12:55AM

    I say good for your daughter! She obviously knows you deserve better.

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A Year Later...

Monday, September 23, 2013

My Blog Entry, STARDATE: 67193

Ok, So I’m a bit too much into Star Trek to that I will always say ‘Guilty as Charged!’ LOL!....

But seriously, Today was a good day if you are a Chicago Sports Fan... White Sox Won, while that team on the North Side raised the ‘L’ Flag (Just a Friendly ‘White Sox’ fan jab to all ‘Cubs’ fans out there. No harm, just a little friendly Crosstown fun), DA BEARS won making them 3 – 0 and The Packers lost making them 1 – 2. (That I mean! LOL!) so you can see that today was a very good day for our sports teams.

As for me personally, I guess there wasn’t much going on over the week. I went to Comisky Park (Sox Park) this week and it made me realize what I don’t miss working at the ball park. Walking the entire park 3 or 4 times over. Granted I didn’t do as much moving around as I would if I was working, but it was a nice getaway and change of pace none the less. Plus with me losing 155 Pounds since I was there last it still was a bit easier moving around and such around the park as I remembered. Plus I was stuck taking Public Transportation to the park and since they are working on the ‘Red Line’ and had the 35th Street stop closed, there was extra few blocks to walk to the ‘Green Line’. But please don’t take this as if I’m complaining about anything, like I said all and all it was still easier to walk around the park than I remembered. I think it was more that I was a bit unprepared of what I was in for because I did honestly forget that the ‘Red Line’ was being worked on and such. I did get a pretty decent seat. Right now the first base line, 3 rows away from the field. A lot of balls were hit into my direction, just not anywhere near my ‘Area of Play’ (sorta speak).

At weigh in Sunday Morning my stats were....

Weight Lost for the Week: –4.2 Pounds or –1.25%
Weight Lost Since Last Clinic Visit (8/27/2013): –9.6 Pounds or –2.81%
Weight Lost Since my Surgery (4/24/2013): –84.65 or –20.29%
Total Weight Lost Since my First Visit to The Weight Clinic (9/13/2012): -154.9 Pounds or -31.77%

What I have been in awe lately is that I have lost –150.7 in one whole year, that is an Average of –2.9 Pounds a week. Yes a very conceivable number but I’ll be honest if you would have told me a year ago that in a year I was going to lose 151 Pounds, I would have looked at you and said “Sure, I have 2 questions for you... What are you on? And why aren’t you sharing?”

In the end all I’m saying that don’t think it can’t be done, because yes even though I did have Gastric Bypass Surgery seven months into the journey, Believe it or not as I look over my weight chart that I do in Excel there wasn’t much change in how quick I was losing the weight. The two points where I lost the most weight was two weeks before surgery (when all you can do is a liquid diet) and about one month after surgery when you are still mostly on a liquid diet trying to get use to what your system will and won’t tolerate.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

POUFFE 10/18/2013 9:52PM

  I received an e mail that said I had received a message from you, but there was nothing in my inbox. If you need to reach me, please try again. I have not used Sparkpeople for some time, but love it!

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REDUCE4LIFE 10/18/2013 8:48PM

  wow we,
I read your entire blog. You have been through it all. I will say this you are a strong person. It is very apparent how much wight you have lost from your profile pic to your current pic, you look so much healthier. Your ex, yikes! Your lucky to have dumped her. For me I'm losing weight old school, weight watchers and this site. I screwed around and messed my health up to the point weight loss surgery would be to risky. I went through the pre opt. Health testing and didn't pass. That was a hard one to wrap my head around. Any hoo keep up the good work and I'm sure there is a decent woman out there for you aim higher this time around😳
Take good care!

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GARDENSFORLIFE 10/18/2013 7:20PM

    emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon Great Blog!
emoticon emoticon emoticon - Great Job
YOU DID IT! emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon !

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DSQUARE22 10/1/2013 10:30PM


Keep up the good work!

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PLMITCH 9/24/2013 8:39AM


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CORTNEY-LEE 9/23/2013 8:59PM

    well done friend!

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BABY_GIRL69 9/23/2013 5:25PM

    Vic, I'm so proud of you!! Glad you are absolutely making things happen!!

God bless & continued success!!!


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PATTYR81 9/23/2013 10:42AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LOVINGAFRICA 9/23/2013 6:42AM

    Vic, you have turned your life right around! That is awesome!
And you made me laugh at all the sport stuff- it's a guy thing!
May the next year be even more awesome, and may you reach every single goal...
Blessings to you

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Team -16 Days and Counting

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Well here we are at TEAM -16 Days and counting... About a week and a half ago I received a letter from my Health Insurance Provider that they approved my surgery. Then Last week I received a call from my Surgeon's Office that my Pre Surgery Visit is April 23rd at 8:30 AM which is real funny because I have my Primary Care Doctor's visit on the same day at 11:15 AM several miles away. Don't get me wrong if everything goes as it should, it shouldn't be much of a problem. I started my Pre-Surgery Liquid Diet today as well, I wanted to start it on the earliest part of the window to start it that My Surgeon gave me to prevent any problems, but at the same time get the best results for everything. My surgery date is set for May 1st.

Everyone has been with me on this, which is a bit surprising. I honestly thought I would get a little resistance from a few people even if they are outside of the circle of Family and Friends, but really the only person who has said anything against the idea of me going though the surgery was my Ex-Girlfriend when I first started going to the weight clinic (But as I said in my last blog entry, it's not like she's still in the picture of things anyway.) The worst thing I got about things was from my Best Friend because her Birthday is the day after my surgery. But she also understands the situation and everything and is being really supportive. Even though has vowed revenge for me telling her husband jokes right after her C-Section 12 Years Ago. LOL! As far as Birthday Celebrations go I told her that her and her husband can have the weekend of her Birthday for themselves. But the first weekend I'm up to things... It's her and I! Her answer to that is "Nope, even though I plan a bit of revenge for the C-Section thing... I plan to come up to the hospital to visit and check on you since really don't have a lady to tend to you and such." I smiled and told her that it wasn't needed, I have no plans to be part of the bed. Don't get me wrong I'm not going to push myself to any limits or such. But I'm not going to lay in bed waiting for discharge papers either. I'm going to get up and move around the room (or the floor if allowed) Of course when I told her that I was even going to have my personal and work cell phones with me she started yelling about "Personal Cell I can understand, But your Work Cell?! NO FREAKING WAY! You will be there to heal, not to do work." Of course I simply said "Yes, Dear." LOL!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CORTNEY-LEE 4/15/2013 12:30PM


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LOVINGAFRICA 4/15/2013 5:42AM

    Your best friend sounds great!
Enjoy the journey to May 1!

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ROOTIHAUSMAN 4/14/2013 3:52PM

    Hope all goes well with your surgery! Positive thoughts!

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Team -31 Days and Counting....

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Team -31 Days and counting...

I don't even know how many diets I have been on in the past and I've been to at least one other weight clinic before where now the 'Doctor' that ran it is now on the run from The FBI and other Federal and Illinois Authorities for a number of things ranging from tax evasion to double or even triple billing peoples insurance companies.

There were a number of things that drove me to check out a fairly new weight clinic in the Chicago Area back in August...

1) (Most Importantly) I was having sever knee problems that my Primary Care Doctor & a Specialist was saying was due to my weight. I mean I was 45 (at the time) and I'm using those damn motorized carts to get around in the store and using a cane to walk with because the pain of standing and walking on my knee was so bad. Not trying to be a jerk or anything like that, but I have always seen those things to be use by those who truly need it. Not by a guy like me who let a few too many pounds pack on.

2) Another big reason (but not as important as the 1st of course) is that every time my Girlfriend (at that time) and I would get into an argument that she knew she had almost no hope on winning or being right on (which was almost everyone we had. And no I'm not saying that to stir up any battle of the sexes thing, she would start an argument for the wrong reason or jumping to the wrong conclusions about one thing or another.) she would always call me some sort of name related to my weight. (Boy did that relationship end badly... I'll explain later)

3) I was just sick and tired of getting up every morning and feeling like I was carrying a 'LOAD' around with me.

When I went to the seminar that they held in August they had their new Program Director (and the person who is ultimately going to do my surgery in May) there detailing all of the programs and surgeries they had to offer. That night after the seminar I made my first appointment with them on September 13th. On the day of my first appointment my Girlfriend was insistent to come with me to show her support on this. My thinking was "Okay, I would like the support. But how do I know you're not going to use this against me on our next argument?" I mean every time we had an argument the first thing she would do is call me some name related to my weight. But believe it or not the one who convinced me to have her come along was my Ex-Wife who I have a child with. She pointed out that support in this area was going to help me more than it would hurt me. (Again not to be mean to anyone, but if you knew my Ex you would realize that she wasn't much of a thinker or such. But there were a few time I couldn't argue her logic and this was one of them). At the first visit after we spoke to the all the doctors I was going to deal with and them calling and consulting with my Primary Care Doctor all the Doctor's agreed that The Gastric Bypass Surgery was my best option. My Girlfriend had a fit! Yelling "No ******* way!" I grabbed her and calmly said "We said we would hear them out, and we would calmly tell the Doc's any problems we might have with any of their suggestions." She grabbed her composure and admitted I was right and apologized for her actions. And the Doctor's continued with their view of things citing my medical history and such. My Girlfriend then spoke up saying that she was against it because she had a friend (more like a friend of her Ex) die because of the surgery. After they asked her a few questions about her 'friends' case and pointed out several factors that she was over looking the 2 biggest that stuck in my head were...

1) The surgery was done several years ago when it was only recommended to be used in extreme or urgent cases and admitted the mortality rate back then was much higher then as well.

2) The reason her 'friend' died was probably due to a blood clot, and insured her that several steps are taken to make sure such a thing don't happen these days.

After they went through everything she was feeling a bit better about things but as you could guess still reluctant about it.

As the months went on to satisfy the insurance requirements of the program several things have come to change in my life. Some good, some not so good, and some middle of the road (sorta speak).

1) As I was going to the weight clinic and losing weight my knee was feeling better. No longer needing those damned motorized carts at the store or my cane. In fact I also found out that big part of my problem on this was that I was real low on 'Vitamin D'. The Doc's told me they like it around '30 to 100' I was at 11. My knee is feeling much better now, I walk around almost normally again (normal meaning like I was a few years ago) and my cane is busy collecting dust in the back of my truck.

2) Got a job that I don't mind too much. I was out of work for over 2 years (only getting seasonal part-time at best) and the job came about a month or so after my unemployment ran out.

3) Eventually in Early November My Girlfriend and I finally called it quits. No matter how much we tried to work things out we just couldn't. She has had issues of repeatedly cheating on me in the past and each time after I cooled some and heard her apology about it several times I would some how look past it, but I did tell her that I would have issues about getting married to someone who has done such a thing (at the time she was trying to talk to me about getting married) and this time this past November was the last straw of everything. This time I found out that she was seeing 3 other guys on the side and all 3 of them were homeless and were 'Hooked Up' by a friend of hers. (Like I said... It ended pretty badly) When I told her I couldn't look past this she actually brought up the fact that I still had 'contact' with my Ex-Wife. I laughed and said "If you mean 'contact' is because I have a child with her and most of our conversations are related to my Daughter? Then Yes I still have 'Contact' with her. But if you're saying what I think you're saying, why would she argue in you're defense when I was debating about taking you to the weight clinic for support?" of course she didn't have an answer for that and started with the weight names. As I walked out of her apartment that day I said "You know I maybe overweight or as you call it a 'Fat F***'! But I am correcting that issue with me and that will change in time. But there is nothing you can do change the fact that you will always be a 'S***'!" (Trying to keep it fairly clean for the website and blog, but what else would we call someone who sees 3 other people behind their Boyfriend's back?)

4) My Best Friend has moved back to The Chicago Area from The Nashville Area, and I am getting out more again (not much more because I'm just getting back to work and all) But I am getting out a bit more than what I was. Feeling a bit better about myself. I recently told her the whole story about what happened between my Ex & me (and yes there were a few details that I left out for a few different reasons, but basically I think she did herself in enough with what I did mention). And My Best Friend basically said that since I'm too much of gentleman to do anything but yell at her, she'll take care of her for me. LOL! In fact the only thing that bums us both out about this. Is that as of right now the surgery is one day before her birthday. I told her that if everything holds as is, Her and Her Husband can party without me that weekend, but the following weekend belongs to me. LOL!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SOOTHINGGLOW 3/31/2013 10:20PM

Wow, she sounds like a real winner. I'm glad to hear you got rid of her. You definitely don't need to have people in your life that are that disrespectful to you.

I just had my RNY surgery 3 weeks ago. Looking forward to hearing about your success.

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DWROBERGE 3/31/2013 10:36AM

    Keep focused for success. You can do it. Go for it.

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