Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Today I went to Weight Watchers to inquire about a job there. I have lost 100 pounds and like helping people reach their health and fitness goals. Basically, they told me I had to do two things.
1. Be part of their program, reach and maintain my goal for 6 weeks.
2. Be at a BMI of 25. (For my height, that is around 145.)
Putting aside the fact I have gained 7 pounds, I am pretty happy at 160. The conversation with the district manager for WW really gave me something to think about. I am not sure if I WANT to lose 20#. No, wait. I am not sure if I have the motivation to put the energy into it like I did before. When I reached my goal of losing 100 pounds, I was exhausted and tired of trying to lose weight. I was ready to be done!
Than, there is the fact I would have to pay $35.95 for the first month than $42.95 for the following months. This fee includes weekly meetings, the point system, and an online community. Why should/would I pay for this if I have Sparkpeople for FREE?
Let's be honest! IF I was tracking my food and fitness, I would be losing weight. That brings me to my next thought. Maybe it is time to let go that I lost 100 pounds. My page is an inspiration to others to do what I did but it is not really motivation for myself like it has been in the past!
With that in mind, maybe it is time to revamp my page and focus on a goal of 20 pounds. This means removing past progress photos. Maybe putting them in a file on the computer for safe keeping. I do have my photos in places besides Sparkpeople, of course! The thing is I know if I started to focus on 1 pound a week (very reasonable!), I could be 155 by New Year's Day! That is a 12 pound loss from what I am today! My boyfriend did say he would help me. He really is supportive!
And, if you are curious, I am still fighting the battle of wanting to store all my food away for winter, like a squirrel and their nuts!
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
In the last couple weeks, I have gotten up to 168. Years ago, when I was 260, this would have been a dream weight. Now, it feels like I am failing at maintaining and heading back to 260-ville.
Even through I know I cannot gain 100 pounds overnight, I felt I was losing control of my eating. That is a scary on so many levels. It wasn't until I opened up to my boyfriend about the real issue at hand, I actually was more in control.
I talked to him about how I feel a sincere fear that if I do not eat all the food at any given moment, that there will not be any food for me later to eat. This comes from two different regular situations.
1. I am a college student with very little money. Sometimes I worry how I am going to eat for x-amount days because I won't have vegetables, meat or pasta. It is scary feeling.
2. My family likes to eat. So, when there is a food that tastes really good, it is gone almost immediately. In the beginning of my weight loss, I used it to my advantage. I knew if I resisted just long enough, the tempting item (i.e. doughnut) would be gone and I wouldn't have to worry. Now, if I want to work a treat in my daily nutrition, I need to hide it. If I don't, someone will eat it on me. My niece learned this lesson as soon as she learned to talk. She started hiding her food as well. If I do not hide it, I eat extra portions because I know it's the last time I will have access to it.
These aren't pretty reasons but they are the reasons I have been able to identify. As I was wrestling with them, I told to my boyfriend about it. He was quite sweet about it and told me he would give me some of his food. The thing is I know when he was growing up he had to fight for food during foster care which he would later share with his sisters. Now, he is willing to do the same for me. That takes a very selfless person.
Putting that aside, I really admire my boyfriend's eating habits. He will put down a half ate piece of pie or cookie returning to it ten minutes later. That is admirable to me because I have to gobble mine up in seconds.
Lately, I have been buying food even through I don't necessarily need it. It is because I know money is going to run out soon and will need food. My boyfriend pointed out that I am nesting. I guess he is right. I am basically stocking up for poorer times.
Anyhow, this is my fear of having no food.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Most of you know I am dating someone. Not really a news flash. Well, Mark's mom is slow and has diabetes. He lives with her and takes care of her. He tries to make sure she eats right. Since he moved in with her a year ago, he got her blood levels to start climbing down from 500. She is supposed to be around 110 for her age.
Well, yesterday us three went to a church picnic. It has donuts, cookies, pies, cheesecake, pasta salad... not a good place for someone with diabetes. We all ate things we should have not ate especially myself.
After the picnic, I went to work out. Mark and his mom came with me. Before we went, I got his mom to check her blood. It was 380s. When we came back, I got her to check it again 190s. That was the lowest it has been at.
This was a twice fold victory. One she doesn't like to check her blood even once a day. And, it was at the lowest for a really long time!
So, even through I gained 10# from my goal weight, not a good feeling at all, it IS a real good feeling to know I am helping them by leading by example of a healthy lifestyle. This is what I really enjoy doing... helping people change their lifestyle so they can enjoy life better.
Health is precious. At the picnic, we listened to person after person ask to be prayed for their health. Some had some serious health conditions that has no cure like Graves disease, cancers, leukemia. Take care of YOU! We have only ONE body for the time we are here on earth!
So, if you are procrastinating on going to the gym, GO! Go to the gym because you need to be healthy for you, your children, your grandchildren.
Monday, September 03, 2012
Sometimes there seems to be an unspoken rule of only one blog a day. Well, today I am breaking that rule. I need to talk about my future.
On December 15th, I will walk across the stage and graduate from college. When you go to college, it is assumed that you WILL get a career with benefits that you will love. In fact, that is why I went back to college when I was a Realtor. I had no health insurance and needed it stat!
Now, I am months away from graduation, looking at the job market and it's not pretty. There is nothing in my geographic area. This alone makes me nervous. I am finally dating a wonderful guy and living in an area neither one of us wants to leave. But, there are no jobs, especially in my field. I was talking to another personal trainer and he mentioned that I could build up being a personal trainer and lifestyle coach. Honestly, I don't want to be a personal trainer.
What I do want is to help people positively change their lifestyle like I did mine. Yes, personal training does that but on such a small scale. I think I could make it work and even do weight loss seminars. But, I want reach a wider span of people. Not just one individual at a time. I guess my dream of wanting to have a weight loss program like Sparkpeople but one they can visit in person is still ignited. I have found careers (PT, RN, RD) that would help me positive change others lifestyles. But, they all take graduate degrees.
Nonetheless, I am super frustrated that I have a 4-year degree that basically means nothing in the job market. My own weight loss and professional certifications mean more than this degree.
Anyhow, thanks for listening. As I write it all out, I could build up personal training and lifestyle coach. Maybe eventually start a business. But, even as I say that, I feel like I am settling...
Monday, September 03, 2012
In my last blog, I talked about switching things up by adding TRX and kettle bell group exercise classes. In theory, it was a great plan. In reality, not so much. In the first week, as I dreaded going to my first TRX class, I remembered that I am not into group exercise classes. In fact, my work outs are my "me" time. With that in mind, why in the world would I go join a group of people to work out? Also, I realized the typical gym - treadmills, selectorized machines and free weights - are my favorite way to work out.
So, we are scratching that plan.
Since the beginning of August, before I started my internship, I was struggling to want to work out. So, I have had a sticky on my calendar that said "4x/week" and each day I worked out, I would get a big on my calendar. Eventually, my boyfriend learned what it was about and started to encourage me to work out even when I wanted to work out. The one day I remember him reminding me that I can't have the benefits (being stress free) of working out if I don't go. I went. And, I remember being glad that I did.
Anyhow, for the month of August, I went reached my goal of working out 4x a week. Keep a look!
I really do the best with my monthly goals when I have ONE simple goal to focus on. Also, when I can put stickers on my calendar to see that I am reaching it. It is like a mini reward to put a sticker on my calendar every day I work out. I have done this to get on track with lifting.
Right now, I am still struggling with nutrition and fitness. So, I could put a sticker on the calendar for working out, lifting, or tracking my food. I think I will stick with lifting on MWF. Since I have to lead the group's runs on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I should be working out five days a week as long as I stick to lifting MWF. By the way, I did my body scan again that tells me how much muscle I have and I gained a pound of muscle since the last time. So, let's go for another pound of muscle!
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