Tuesday, May 01, 2012
Another blog? Yes, I think so!
In the last few weeks, I have been waiting to hear from a certain internship. Until I have a decision for my internship, I am living in limbo where I cannot make plans about anyone or any races. The internship that I am waiting to hear about would be amazing but I am starting to wonder if I want it. My place of employment has been pressuring me in completing my internship with them and provided an internship opportunity that is quite enticing. Basically, I would be in charge of the local YMCA running program from start to finish. In my opinion, this is an amazing opportunity because I get to design everything. The running program is not even scraping what their potential could be. It could be so much more!
Anyhow, this really got me thinking. What if place #1 offers me an internship? Do I even want it? More and more, I am finding pros with staying at home that extend beyond the internship opportunity at the local YMCA.
1. Since working at the Y, I have met some amazing people and feel like I am part of the town's community, something I have not had in other towns. It may be cold here but the people will warm you up!
2. I have three friends that will be getting married within the next year and do not want to miss their weddings. Some are new friends. Some are old friends. But, it is a special day for them and would like to help celebrate that day with them.
3. Right now, I am training for Grandma's Full Marathon. A couple weeks ago, I did 17.45 miles. It was awesome to reach a new milestone for mileage but I feel I pushed it too hard. I am still sore. This past Sunday I ran 4 1/2 miles and the next day, my body was screaming at me. My hips were sore. My knees were throbbing. My shins were pulsing. These things were nothing I couldn't handle. Yet it was my body saying, "Hello up there.. yeah, you.. this is too much." In fact, I have a half marathon in a few days and I am really wondering how well it is going to go.
Even through my professors feel I could do better, like I am setting my sights low, I feel like I would be able to do some personal things for myself, like sharing memories with friends and family. So often I have lived in the past or the future - never the present. For once, I want to live in the present by celebrating my friend's greatest memories or training for my first full marathon.
With these thoughts in the back of my mind, I wonder "Will I regret if I don't go?" Will I regret not going to South Carolina? Even through it could be a great start for my career, I do not think so. I love my field but I want my life to be more than a career.
As I approach graduation, people consistently ask me what are my career aspirations. I realize I want so much more than a job. I want a career where I can touch and change people lives. I want my children to be healthy - mentally and physically. I can teach them that. I want friends with similar interests that are caring, trustworthy and real.
Tuesday, May 01, 2012
I wish I was better at handling stress. Lately, it seems like I am always stressed and just cannot relax. It's the job. It's the friends. It's the internships. It's the end of the semester. It's my finances. Or, maybe it's just me.
So, what's going on? Let me tell you. (I will try to make it quick!)
You already know about the job. So, let's skip on over that one. My boss is retiring in a month and a half. I can hold out. I can, gosh darn it!
In the last few years, I have made alot of changes, inside and out, and promptly outgrew many of my friends. In fact, I don't feel like I have any similar interests with them. I think that is why I am happy at work... they are like me.. they desire a healthy lifestyle and pursues one. My previous friends actually do not really get my desire to eat healthy or work out. This situation is quite lonely.
For the last few weeks, I have been waiting on a certain internship in South Carolina to hear an answer. As more time goes on, I am not sure if I even want it. Even through I am ready to move on from college, I have made a life here in this little town. Every week the Run for Life internship where I would be in charge of the program appeals to me everyday. It's not just the internship. It's also being close to my family, being able to go to weddings of my close friends, and being able to train for Whistlestop Marathon. The last one means I could start training for it in June and STILL run my first full marathon when I am 26!
End of the semester...
Everyone is stressed at school, professors and classmates alike. I pick up on stress really easy. I only have a couple more things to do than it should be finals week. So glad it's almost over.
So, what am I doing about all this? I am not doing well if it at all! In fact, today I stressed ate half a bag of almond joys. You know the funny thing about stress eating.. I know I am doing it but I don't care. I just want relief. My counselor says to journal. Why? I am stressed. I don't care about my weight. I just don't want to be stressed anymore. I have found out that lifting helps relieve some of that stress.
Talking of lifting, I only missed like TWO days during the month of April! Now that's progress. Tomorrow I attempt to do it with May.
Anyhow, if I seem a bit stressed.. well.. because I am. Just so you know. Today I got some relief with doing some running and on Sunday I will be doing Eau Claire's Half Marathon so that's more stress relief. Monday I work so it might be short lived.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Today after work, I drove up to the north shore, planning to run along Brighton Beach. As I drove, it was relaxing to watch the waves on Lake Superior. Mother nature can be a beautiful thing! Eventually, I pulled over and shot some pictures.
Like last weekend, I had a choice. Either to get out of the car and run. Or not. Today, I chose not to. As I was driving the North Shore, I was nauseous and got my headache again. This is when I decided to pull out my rule book out and listen to my body. Today my body was saying, "Hello, person up there, we need a rest." As I promised a couple weeks ago, I listened.
In fact, I followed rule #5 to the tee.
It says: "Listen to your body. If it says I am tired or this isn't fun, stop. If it says, I need more food because I am tired, eat more! If it says rest, well, rest."
I even did the second part without thinking too much. I picked up a pizza and ate nearly the whole thing. Than, a hour later, I took a nap... for four hours. You think I needed some major sleep? I do.
Tomorrow I have the day off so I think I shall run. I will run as much or as little as I feel. It might be no miles. Tomorrow I might just lift. My trainer gave me new exercises and I am excited to them. They make me feel strong!
Either way, I do have a race to prepare for this week. Last time I forgot that. This week my focus has to be my base runs and water, water, water! It is important. Last time I tried to do it last minute. Not cool. So, let the water drinking begin!
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
I am a person that believes in putting out positive energy. This is the reason I believe in putting out positive blog. This is not one of them. Sorry about that but I need to let out some frustrations.
For the last year and half, I have working at the Y as part of the Wellness Center staff. I understand that I have to work some weekends. On the other hand, if I need a weekend off, I have to request, the entire weekend off. Than, in addition to that, I have deal with a guilt trip from my boss.
During May, I told her I need every Saturday off. Basically, I am sick of working every Saturday when our two interns get them off. In fact, the one intern gets every single weekend (Friday-Sunday) off in May where I am fighting for mine.
I am just so livid. I just got off the phone with my boss. I called to see if she got the schedule done. During discussing the weekends, she told me I got all the weekends off. All three of them. Um, hold the phone. Isn't there FOUR weekends in a month? Than, she precedes to guilt-trip me and was like I need someone on May 12th and May 26th. No way am I taking though. May 12 is my cousin's wedding. I may get disowned if I don't go! And May 26th is Memorial weekend. I am not working though.
Here's a thought.. maybe make it clear to the interns that they have to work weekends too. Than, she wouldn't be in this bind. I am NOT doing it. I already feel guilty! Argh!!!
I really am ready to graduate and move onto a career that does not require ME to work every single weekend. I want a life beyond college! This working four jobs is nonsense. More and more, I want to give my notice at the Wellness Center and just become a personal trainer.
I am ready to live in an apartment where I do not have to climb a flight of stairs to make my breakfast.
I am ready to be able to sleep because I won't have a zillion loud people outside my door like all the time.
I am ready to make friendships with new, mature people in a new area!
I am ready!
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Yesterday, I decided I would train for Grandma's Marathon with an open heart and mind. I was even excited for today's long run. Imagine my excitement, though, when I looked outside and saw it was half snowing, half raining. I looked at the forecast. By jolly, light rain all day.
Right there and than, I decided I had a choice. Either I can run, make the best of it or not train for Grandma's Marathon. I need to start running longer than 13.1 miles.
I decided to run. And, boy, did I ever?
I ended up with 17.45 in 4 hours and 10 minutes. When I set out, my route that I tracked yesterday online was 16.05. Apparently, when I ran it, it was a mile and half longer. So, I went from 13.1 to 17.45. That is a big jump. One is supposed to ONLY increase 10%, that is one rule I always follow, to not get an injury. So, at best, I should have done a 15-miler. By planning on 16 miles, I figured what's one more mile. Well, I found out how it feels to add 20% of your mileage when I did more than 17.
In summary, my front part of my leg - half way between my shin and ankle - is super sore. I have been putting it in an ice bath - off and on - for the last couple hours. It is pretty inflamed. It hurts to move forward with it. I cannot bring my toes up towards the sky. No dice. So, hoping the ice bath/elevation will help. Yes, I am doing RICE. Maybe before I go to bed, I will take some ibuprofen but trying to let my body heal naturally.
On the upside, I am feeling pretty good about Grandma's Marathon. After today, I think I have three super longer runs - runs longer than 12 miles. One is next weekend, one over my cousin's wedding (still figuring out how to deal with that one) and one over Memorial Day weekend. I feel with breaking the 13.1 barrier, I can do this. It was ALOT easier than I expected. Sure, there were times that I didn't run. Than, I took a Gu. They are like magic, hehe!
After today's hard work on the road, I figured I earned some guilt-free pleasures so I made homemade pizza (crust from the Sparkpeople Cookbook) than had a glass of wine. I can feel myself crashing pretty hard so I will probably go to bed shortly. Hopefully, I will make it to 8 pm. Tomorrow, I work 9-5 pm.
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