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Either I am IN or OUT

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

A couple weeks back, I announced that I decided I wasn't going to run Grandma's Marathon in June. I had a good cry, called up the family, had another good cry, announced it on here. Once it's announced on here, it feels so official.

Well, here's a secret. I have been still training. For the last couple weekends, I have had time to run and did a distance of 12 miles. It even started to get easier. Not even close to the disaster I called the Get Lucky Half Marathon in March.

Also, in recent weeks, I feel like all the rules that I had when I was in training mode were released. It was so nice.

It was so nice to focus on losing weight. Now I know about tracking food and working out. So many people told me I could not lose weight while training so it felt like an impossible goal. But, if I treat it as calories burned, shouldn't I be able to lose weight?

Also, this week I could exercise and strength train. Not because I am in training but because I want to, because I enjoy it. In fact, I went for an afternoon walk today in the sunshine. Also, if I wanted to do kettlebells or try rock climbing, I can. There is no one saying "You can't. You're in training."

Because I am not in training.

It is like last night. I realized I haven't had a nice glass of wine for months. Why? Because when would I? I shouldn't be drinking alcohol the night before a run because I am in training. I usually like it to unwind from the week on a Friday. But, than it messes with my hydration levels for my long run on Saturdays.

But, all these restraints were gone. I could do whatever I wanted because I wasn't in training.

Because stressing about these trivial things, I was stressing every weekend about when to run. Well, I have requested every Saturday off in May. So, I wouldn't be stressing in May. As for April, I would have two Saturdays that I would struggle with. One being this weekend which I could actually do my long run tomorrow and a short one on Sunday. Even if I didn't want to do that, I have co-workers coming out of the woodworking to take my Saturday. Since, my boss likes to schedule me once during the week and every Saturday, this means I'd be giving up hours.

So, basically, I need to decide if I am IN or I am OUT, none of this wishy-washy business anymore.

If I am IN, I have decided I will be training casually. No rules, just fun. I CAN lose weight. I CAN have wine. I CAN eat normally.

If I am OUT, I will find a way to accept that this year is NOT my year. I will start to train to improve my half marathon finishing time.

Mind you, I have an appointment with the campus nutritionist. I am hoping she can tell me if I am doing fine with my eating. Like could I train on what I am doing or if there more efficient foods to eat for me.

So, those are my thoughts on this potentially life changing event.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JTAYLOR2011 4/13/2012 8:22AM

    emoticon No matter what you decide find that place of joy, even if just for a fleeting moment in what you do. emoticon

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LISAINMS 4/12/2012 2:08PM

    Savannah, it isn't that you can't lose weight while training for half or full. It's that most people do not and many gain a few. It has to do with how much you eat and more to do with how your body responds to the stress of the increased mileage. My first round I gained a few. Second time I lost several. I was better prepared for the physical requirement. Regarding not being able to do things you enjoy... at the time you blogged about it, you were experiencing overtraining symptoms. The advice to cut back on additional activities had to do with how much you were already doing for class requirements, work and training mileage in order to avoid full blown overtraining syndrome which can take months to fully recover. You can do other activities that you enjoy while training, but keep it all in perspective with how you are feeling. The same with alcohol, dinners out and anything else that affects how you feel. You don't have to give up all things enjoyable. Training should be fun. It's a huge thing to tackle if you feel like you are living a joyless life just to do it. Do what makes you happy!

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GETFIT2LIVE 4/12/2012 12:44PM

    "Training casually." YES! It takes the stress out of things enormously when you approach it like that and gives you so much more freedom to actually ENJOY life and the whole process. Make the decision that gives you the most joy; that's the bottom line to as far as I'm concerned. I don't want to be so caught up in reaching the goal that I don't have fun along the way. (Remind me of this when I start stressing out about things myself, okay?)


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NATPLUMMER 4/12/2012 11:34AM

    emoticon emoticon

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MYLADY4 4/12/2012 11:18AM

    Training should be fun too. So far mine has been but I cannot wait until it is done and I can start doing other things (biking and yardwork).

And yep, I have some wine too, even cooked with it the other night.

Hope the nutritionist helps.

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FIREFLUTTERFLY 4/12/2012 11:17AM

    I find that the stricter my training the more I stress about it and the results I see are not as good when I go with the flow more. If you decide to go for it, then don't stress. Just enjoy the moment and remember, no matter what time you get on your first marathon it will be your PR. The next one after that is the one you build on.

Godd luck!

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    I was always told that I would gain while training for my 1/2....well, I lost a few pounds,nothing major but why should I eat more than I need? I felt great while running and working around the house so I was getting enough food. I focus on greens and whole foods and they give me the energy for LIFE and training~~
I say do what you're doing right now-enjoy life,training(however you define it) and your food!

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KJDOESLIFE 4/12/2012 8:44AM

    You can lose weight during training. I've lost 5 pounds so far. That's not a crazy amount or even 1 lb/wk, but I've lost weight during training for HMs, too. I still drink wine, too, and the occasional beer. Although it's a big part of my focus right now, life doesn't revolve around training. Sometimes it does, though, like on a Friday night when my BF wants to go out and hang out with friends til 1am (and it's very convenient that I go so I can drive him home) and I have to get up at 7am to run. That's about the only time I throw a "training is important" temper tantrum. :) Good luck in whatever you decide!

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JPGSMOM 4/12/2012 7:22AM

    I'm proud of you Savannah! Sometimes letting go is the only way to move forward.

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EMFRAPPIER 4/12/2012 5:53AM

    Do what's right for you, but there is definitely nothing wrong with relaxed training. I got too hung up in the details for a while and freaked out about my weight going up. I had to figure out what kind of training I could fit into my life, and though it may not be as much as some training programs suggest, I am feeling pretty confident in my ability to complete the marathon in May. emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 4/11/2012 11:38PM

    Dear Savannah:

Well, I think it's already been said but I'll say it again, too. You and only you can make the decision, and whatever decision you make will be right for you! Trust your instincts.

Just because you're not training for a specific marathon or 1/2 marathon . . . whatever . . . doesn't mean you can't run for the love of it! I like your term . . . train casually. That's the way to approach it . . . for now anyway.

Good for you for going to see the campus nutritionist. We can't be experts in all things, so if this seems to be a confounding point for you, good that you're getting help.

It rubs me the wrong way, though, when people say, "You can't (or you won't be able to) fill in the blank". GRRRR! You can do whatever you make your mind up to do. It may not be accomplished on your timetable, but you can do it! So don't listen to negativity.



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PATRICIAANN46 4/11/2012 10:47PM

  Hi Savannah.........
Make what is the BEST DECISION for YOU..........
Only YOU know what is best.....

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ABSOLUTZER0 4/11/2012 10:40PM

    As I'm talking to you know, I'll simply say this: #GOGETIT #BeYourOwnSuperhero


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My Reward for Lifting

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

My homework assignment from my personal trainer a couple weeks ago was to do 2 sessions each week. The first week I did THREE sessions in one week. Now for those folks that strength train three times a week, that LOVE to strength train, that LIVE for it, find it to be no big deal. For me, it was HUGE! So huge I decided to reward myself for just that week! I got myself some lifting gloves! Look, look!

Now, I am starting to feel my motivation starting to teeter downward again. Trying to come up with another reward. So far I have thought of a sports massage when I do my lifting sessions Monday, Wednesday and Friday for the month of April. But, if I miss one, than the whole month is gone. I think I need a bi-monthly reward. New dress? Saucony shoes? Sports bra? All things that are cool but feel it wouldn't be much of an reward. Maybe a running necklace...

Fun update: I have gained 1/2 pound of muscle since starting to train so I have a total of 61.1 pounds of muscle. Shooting for 62 by the end of May. Also, I did TEN emoticon on the bar last session! My lifting IS working!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHERYLDS 4/11/2012 2:51PM

    Oooooh emoticon

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MYLADY4 4/10/2012 2:04PM

    Cool gloves, girl power. Great job on gaining muscle too.

You remind me of my sister in that she too, also needs goals all the time.

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1CRAZYDOG 4/10/2012 1:17PM


Way to go! Awesome work. Love the gloves.


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KKINNEA 4/10/2012 12:47PM

    Great reward! I may have to do something similar to keep me moving.

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CARBJUNKIE83 4/10/2012 12:43PM

    omg How cute!! I love the pink! Good for you for adding ST to your routine! It's very important - so emoticon for getting started!!!

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EMFRAPPIER 4/10/2012 12:19PM

    Great reward!!!

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GETFIT2LIVE 4/10/2012 11:57AM

    Very nice reward--definitely set up some of those to keep the motivation going. I don't get excited about strength training, either, but since I've been doing a couple of ST group classes a week, I AM seeing changes and improvements, so it's definitely worth it. I'd be motivated by a running necklace as a reward!

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ABSOLUTZER0 4/10/2012 11:51AM

    That's a nice reward! Keep it up! Rewarding yourself does help. Woohoo!

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NATPLUMMER 4/10/2012 11:51AM

    Cute gloves!! If a running necklace feels like a reward, then it should be. A sports massage will be well deserved.
Yay for more muscle!! emoticon

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Need Motivation? Look here!

Monday, April 09, 2012

Since joining the Wellness Center staff at my local Y, I considered the gym my new source of inspiration. When I have all my cleaning tasks done, I basically watch people work out.

Today was more inspiring than usual. Today a member raised $7,160 for our Strong Kids Campaign by running 16 hours on a treadmill. emoticon

I struggle with one hour on the treadmill. Today Chris did 16 times that amount. So, if you think you just cannot work out today. I challenge you. Go to the gym. And, watch people work out. I bet you will get motivated to get moving in no time!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JTAYLOR2011 4/11/2012 7:35AM

    Thanks for sharing! emoticon

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PATRICIAANN46 4/10/2012 10:36PM

  Great advice............ emoticon

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GETFIT2LIVE 4/10/2012 11:22AM

    How cool is that? Amazing!

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KKINNEA 4/10/2012 11:15AM

    Awesome, he's a beast! What a great way to help the community!

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BAILEYS7OF9 4/10/2012 11:04AM

    emoticon16 hours... holy cow!

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MYLADY4 4/10/2012 10:09AM

    That is superhuman.

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NATPLUMMER 4/10/2012 9:27AM


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MNGIRLIE 4/10/2012 7:31AM

    I heard about this on the way to work yesterday morning on MPR. Thanks for sharing the link!

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XRSIZE18 4/10/2012 4:34AM


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ABSOLUTZER0 4/10/2012 12:00AM

    This is the same reason why working out in a group helps. Others around you will make you push harder and it's not like they have to do anything special. Being there and doing what they normally do can motivate or inspire you to push harder. The same holds true for you, too. You never know when someone may see you and it helps them. Keep pushing!

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NADS1959 4/10/2012 12:00AM

    thats amazing

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What are my odds of keeping this weight off?

Sunday, April 08, 2012

It's a thought that I think about nearly everyday. Will I be part of the 15% that is determined to keep it off? I want to say yes. But, lately I am not too sure if I can beat the odds.

Today I was reading information about weight loss management from the American Council of Exercise, experts of the field. Honestly, it really got to me. If everything points that I will regain the weight within 5 years, why even fight it? Why not succumb it?

Than, we had Easter dinner. Well, you know I didn't eat well. In fact, it was like I was trying to shove as much food as I could in my mouth before everyone else got done. Basically, I was emotional eating. So, I am even further from being at the 160 point again.

Lately, I am not sure even why I want this lifestyle. Everyone around me seem to be heavier but happier. All I ever wanted was to be happy and feel good about me. No matter what size I am, I am fighting for myself. And, it's not going to be easier.

I need to figure this thing out before I sabotage myself even more...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JTAYLOR2011 4/9/2012 9:12PM

    I'm just not hearing any of this. You will succeed. I know it. I see it. I believe it!! You are part of the 15%. This this is DONE. You GOT this! Period. emoticon emoticon

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MELLYBEANS0919 4/9/2012 8:12PM


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    It is a choice. Most people who are very overweight and say they are happy are in denial. I don't want to spend my later part of my life in constant pain and on tons of meds to control all the the ailments I have because I just didn't take care of myself. Yes, it is hard but you can do this when the motivation is just to be healthy. Hugs. I understand where you are coming from.

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TINAJANE76 4/9/2012 7:24PM

    Both my dad and my father-in-law had heart attacks this week due to largely preventable factors. My dad also has Type II diabetes brought on by poor diet and lack of exercise and an "I'd rather be fat and happy" attitude. Well, that attitude almost led to him being dead at 63 before he even got to see his grandchildren born. It may seem pointless to follow a healthy diet and exercise and that you'd be happier to be heavy and eat what you want, but what kind of quality of life do you want down the road? Living a healthy lifestyle doesn't mean you can't ever indulge or even overindulge. You just can't do it every day at every meal. To me, it's worth the sacrifice of not eating what I want, when I want it all the time if it means living longer and feeling more comfortable in my own skin.

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KANSASROSE67 4/9/2012 4:22PM

    As I watch my dad go through the horror of Lou Gehrig's disease, I am reminded every day of what an incredible blessing good health is. No, reaching a certain magic number on the scale will not necessarily make us happy all the time, but we should try our best to use our God-given gift of a healthy body to live the best possible life. Even if your weight is up 10 pounds you can still do so many wonderful things that others only dream of. Enjoy it to the fullest!

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GETFIT2LIVE 4/9/2012 4:21PM


You've already received some great input from others here. The truth is, maintenance is hard work, but it's work you are capable of. Don't let the statistics get to you; they are only numbers, and you are much more than just another number.

Stopping to examine why you want to do this is a good thing; it has to be for the right reasons, for YOU, otherwise it becomes too hard to keep going. Remember that you are worth the effort, and you're not alone. Wouldn't it be a wonderful thing to be part of a trend that starts turning those statistics upside down by not only losing the weight but KEEPING it off? We can do it!

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SHERYLDS 4/9/2012 4:12PM

    WHAT ??????

my Savannah is a woman who knows what she wants and put 200% of herself to get there. My Savannah doesn't whimp out...she marches on and pushes herself to be her best. Where's my Savannah?????
Get her back her this instant !!!

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LISAINMS 4/9/2012 3:37PM

    Baileys7of9 said exactly what I was thinking. Look at that pic and remember how you felt. You were on top of the world. Let that lift you up and determine your resolve. You are that girl. Don't let a handful of pounds and stressful marathon training undo you. You are much more than that! There will always be more marathons to sign up for that will work into your schedule. You have taken great strides to have the life you want --you are worth continuing to pursue what makes you feel great.

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BAILEYS7OF9 4/9/2012 12:24PM

    I think you need to blow up that pic of you SMILING in front of two bags of dog food...representing what you lost. It will be your strength! When you feel like emotional eating...remember that picture... emoticon

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KKINNEA 4/9/2012 12:10PM

    I believe you can do it. It's always tough to try to stay on track in weight-loss mode around food-centered holidays! I usually just go with it, try to be as moderate as possible, then shake it off the next day and get back to good habits. Maybe I need to add a "no guilt" clause to my "no heros" clause.

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MYLADY4 4/9/2012 10:48AM

    I agree with what some others have said. We you really happy 100 pounds ago, I think not otherwise you would have not lost all the weight.

Yes it is hard, it is a struggle everyday and sometimes it is just not fair when you see people eat what every they want and you look as certain foods and gain weight.

I have been able to keep at least 50 pounds off for over 6 years and it has not been easy but it has been worth it so it is possible. Am I where I want to be, no, but am I better then I was 10 years ago, hell yes.

Become one of the 15% that does succeed and change the statistic to 16%.

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NATPLUMMER 4/9/2012 9:54AM


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    I love what onekidsmom said. So ditto that. Also you are so young and have a real great chance of not being a stastic like me of being a yo-yo dieter. There are huge health issues for those of us in that catagory. Trust me you don't want to be here.

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XRSIZE18 4/9/2012 12:29AM

    I know you're just venting right now and maybe don't want advice, but I feel like I need to throw in my two cents (because I think you're awesome and want you to keep smiling - you have a very pretty smile!).
First of all, you HAVE kept the weight off for almost an entire YEAR! That's a HUGE accomplishment. Secondly, I know you said you want to be happy at any size, but I'm pretty sure being morbidly obese doesn't make ANYONE happy - if you're honest with yourself I bet you had WAAAAY more self doubt when you were 100 pounds heavier than you do now - just for different reasons. Thirdly, you've gained back 10 pounds and I think that's messing with your mind - I think it's hard to reach your big weight loss goal (and so many other little ones along the way - like a half marathon) and then have no other goal to latch on to. Suddenly, you're done. Except then you realize you're not and the realization that it is a LIFELONG battle IS a hard one. Fourthly, STOP reading those articles that make you doubt yourself!!!

Fifthly - HUG! umm... I think that is a great way to end this rant.

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ON2VICTORY 4/8/2012 9:20PM

    Studies by the National Institue Of Health and the National Weight Control Registry also state that those who have kept their weight off for a period of about 3-5 years have a really good probability of succeeding long term.

Now to define success, a 10-20 pound regain in the light of a massive loss is not a failure in my book. Life happens. If one has lost 100 pounds and regains around 15, I would hardly define that as a failure but it can mentally crush someone who is not looking at the big picture. big picture being that they still have a net loss of 85 pounds and that is huge.

I would say that your odds are very good. I dont give regain a second thought. I may get discouraged a time or two but i would never toss what I love out the window because of what a study says.

the geeks in the white smocks can take a powder, I have a triathlon to train for. You dont get to be the little engine that could by listening to naysayers....

Comment edited on: 4/8/2012 9:22:15 PM

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PATRICIAANN46 4/8/2012 9:10PM

  Hi Savannah.....
First of all........YOU are worth all of the hard work it has taken you to get to this point and all of the hard work it takes to stay here. Go back to the very beginning of your journey........were you happy? If not, why? It may not be weight-related and if it isn't, then you need to work on whatever it is that is preventing you from being happy. Losing weight is NEVER going to make anyone completely happy if there are other issues at hand. You are only 26. I would give anything to be your age and know all that I know now about how weight affects our health. You are healthy now and are able to run and do other exercises to keep you healthy. If you keep up with it now and never allow yourself to go back to your highest weight, you will benefit in so many ways. None of this is easy; but it is SO WORTH IT.

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1CRAZYDOG 4/8/2012 8:58PM

    ((((((HUGS))))))) It IS difficult. I am in year 2 (just since January) of maintenance. It is quite difficult, and I haven't been @ it as long as you have. It definitely is NOT an easy thing, and it does take a lot of self-love first of all (because we definitely ARE worth all the effort) and some days are going to be better then others. The trick is getting those good days carry us through the bad days. It's really a matter of choice to get through those bad days. Not easy.

Hang tight my dear! It IS worth it. Weight WILL fluctuate, as you know. So, that's when you look @ what you're doing and see, "What can I change up?" it's hard to do that, I know.

The other thing I would say to you is this. Were you happy before you got things in order with your lifestyle? Just a question. For ME, I have to say I was NOT. And compounding that was the health issues that I was enduring. NOT where I want to go back to. And I would hedge my bets that YOU don't want to go backwards either.

Glad that you vented, because that's very important. You know we "get it".

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ONEKIDSMOM 4/8/2012 8:13PM

    You have uncovered a truth when you said this: "I am not sure even why I want this lifestyle. Everyone around me seem to be heavier but happier. All I ever wanted was to be happy and feel good about me. "

Here's the deal: you thought that losing weight would solve other issues that challenged your happiness. It doesn't. However, losing weight does have several other advantages. Keeping it off has some huge advantages. Sounds like a good time for re-assessment.

I'm in similar shoes... having gone through three days of bad eating behavior in a row... and wondering what's up, because I know there's something up in my emotional life that is at the root of all this.

We are worth the work it takes to be healthy, to stay at a healthy weight. Let's not let a few days undermine all our hard work... but let's look at the WHY questions, all over again... because I know it's worth it. I just have to find some fresh why's!

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DOTTY7267 4/8/2012 7:59PM

    I understand what you are going through. I have been on maintenance for over 3 years now, but each day I have to make conscious decisions about things that are best for me. One of the greatest motivators for me is thinking about how hard it was for me to get to where I am today. I would hate to think that it was all in vain. I also sought counseling to deal with the issues that caused the weight, and why I felt there was safety within the pounds. If you take the time to ask yourself "Am I really hungry now? If the answer in your head is "no", then ask yourself "what am I feeling?" - that is the beginning.

I wish you the best, as I hope to be in the minority with my weight loss. I want to be one of the ones that surpass the 5 year mark, and I hope that you will join the group as well! emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/8/2012 8:01:26 PM

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PUFFIN05 4/8/2012 7:45PM

    You have already proven that you can beat the odds. You've achieved the weight that you wanted! That willpower will help keep the happier, healthier you.

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How did this weight gain happen anyhow?

Thursday, April 05, 2012

In my last blog, I admitted I gained approximately 10 pounds. That is the first step, right? Admitting you have a problem.

For the last three days, I have tracked and noticed I am over approximately 500 calories. Basically, the amount of calories I am supposed to be deficient in order to lose weight.


And, since my exercise has been squeezed out due to a busier life, the amount of calories I am NOT burning is increasing. In turn, I gained weight. Weight loss really is a numbers game.

So, I need to either eat less or exercise more. Eating less is not an option - darn, tasty food! Bring on the exercise. I really feel I can do this! It helps that next week my earliest class will be at 10 am. Just gotta get this butt out of bed earlier.

The plan?
Track everyday.
Exercise for 45 minutes everyday.
Strength train 3x a week.

And, maybe start walking to campus more. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRKNOCKS 4/13/2012 7:33PM

  It is sooo easy to slide back. Easter week was bad for me with the grandkids here and all the goodies just waiting to be eaten. But there comes a time to get back on track and it looks like you are well on you way!

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PATRICIAANN46 4/6/2012 10:02PM

  Hi Savannah........
Your plan sounds good to me. Unfortunately, those pounds tend to creep back when we aren't as active. I'm not worried about you know what to do and you will do it.
Have a wonderful Easter.

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GETFIT2LIVE 4/6/2012 2:55PM

    Very good plan--you got this. You caught things before it went too far, and you're doing something about it (besides whine and cry, which is what I am prone to do!). Yes, darn tasty food; it's my weakness as well!

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KKINNEA 4/6/2012 1:16PM

    It's the tasty food that gets me every time too. You've got the plan!

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JPGSMOM 4/6/2012 12:34PM

    You're right on track to meeting your goals! Congrats!

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NATPLUMMER 4/6/2012 12:16PM

    Good plan.....goodbye pounds!!

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ON2VICTORY 4/6/2012 10:59AM

    you got this my friend. if you ever need anything, you know where to find me :)


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1CRAZYDOG 4/6/2012 8:28AM

    Awww, hugs. You will get through this. Remember, you're under stress, too and that makes a HUGE difference in what our bodies do. That nasty ol' cortisol makes the body superglue that darn fat to our bodies!

So, you're right . . . hopefully next week with a schedule that allows you to get a little more sleep, things will get more in rhythm for you.



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TEDDYBABE 4/6/2012 6:58AM

    I am in ths group also. I have finally put brakes on gain. Now to get the weight off. Yes we can do this.

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IMSMILEY88 4/6/2012 6:43AM

    I am with you! I, too have been eating more and exercising less and gaining. Ugh! But, we can turn this around! We just need to do it, right?

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