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Insulting Friend/Trainer

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Sometimes my runs are hard because of something is weighing on my mind. Today during my 2 mile run, I thought about a conversation I may have to initiate if things continue as they are. Let me explain.

Right now, I am training with a friend. During our first session, I made the comment about how I have swimmer's shoulders. Okay, maybe they aren't perfectly sculpted like a swimmer but I am very proud of them. Immediately, my 'friend' said you don't have swimmer shoulders. And, continued with, 'I would like your shoulders be like this.' This really hurt.

Yes, I want to improve my body but this does NOT give him permission to pick apart my body. Today is our second session. Honestly, I am not looking forward to it. If he starts to insult me, I may have to tell him that is not allowed. If he feels it is part of training, maybe I should find a new trainer (and friend).

Those were two of the hardest miles I have done. Hoping to leave that stress behind very soon!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GODDESSOFHOME 2/2/2012 12:50PM

    Good job using your run to work through this. Sounds like you know what to do!

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ERIKA05 2/1/2012 4:28PM

    What an a$$hole!
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I'm starting to wonder if your boss assigned you this guy because no one else would take him. If I can run the risk of being a bit of an a-hole myself, and give you some advice from an "older and (theoretically) wiser" perspective - Don't be afraid to say very clearly that this isn't working for you, and outline what you will and won't accept. Be firm. It might just be a case of his training style not meshing with your learning style - some clients respond to very negative feedback as a "challenge" so that may be what he's going for - he can't improve if he doesn't know it bothers you, afterall. BUT... if you lay your cards on the table and there isn't an immediate improvement? Drop him like bad date and ask to be assigned someone else. You're the client, and you deserve to have your expectations met. I'm sure you're not looking for someone to blow sunshine up your butt, but respect and courtesy aren't too much to ask. In fact, they should be minimum requirements.

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JANEMAR2 2/1/2012 1:03PM

    Absolutely speak up. You have come so far and achieved so much and you deserve to be respected. Talk to him and give him another chance. Maybe you'll find you can really work well with him and achieve your goals.

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WADINGMOOSE 2/1/2012 12:23PM

    Wow. That was so not supportive. Feel good about your shoulders. Sometimes it's so hard to find something about ourselves to be proud of, it sucks that someone would try to take that away from you!

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XRSIZE18 2/1/2012 9:48AM

    Yikes. That would be rough. You've worked really hard to be where you are today and comments like that can definitely derail one's self-confidence (I know it would mine). I hope that he gets the fact that he can't say things like that without you having to confront him. But I'm glad you've already decided you will if it continues.

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HANNAHV 2/1/2012 3:26AM

    emoticon emoticonYou know you are emoticon so why even let it get to you

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1CRAZYDOG 1/31/2012 8:44PM

    Good heavens! Under NO circumstances should he be insulting. That's totally unprofessional and hurtful and I'd tell him that upfront. IF that continues I'd be heading to find a new trainer. Just not a good situation for YOU.

HUGS!
Barb

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MYLADY4 1/31/2012 8:40PM

    Set boundries NOW. He may not realize that he is hurting your feeling and if he does realize it, bad on him.

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SCOOTER4263 1/31/2012 7:32PM

    What the heck - tell him how you felt when he said that. Maybe he was having a weird day or something. You don't want to lose a friend over a misunderstanding - give him a chance to explain and maybe apologize. If he really meant it, kick him to the curb. Just don't brood about it and let it get under your skin. We give away our power too readily.

And if you're paying for this clown and he meant what he said, then you fire his a$$ and hire a new trainer.

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ICANDOTHIS1968 1/31/2012 5:10PM

  He should find ways to encourage, not discourage you. Letting him know will free you from the stress by confronting something that hurt you and will help him become a better trainer. How he received it would dictate whether I'd continue using him as a trainer or not. emoticon

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PATRICIAANN46 1/31/2012 4:01PM

  Hi Savannah.........
If you are under this much stress with this trainer, then you need to either clear the air and let him know that insults are NOT allowed, or move on to a different trainer. The tension is definitely NOT worth it.
Good Luck.

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LUCYLU221 1/31/2012 3:20PM

    A true trainer and a true friend are supportive. They dont find ways or say things to hurt or insulte.

I hope you get it worked out. But if not then you need to let that one go and find and true trainer/friend.

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GETFIT2LIVE 1/31/2012 2:21PM

    Insults are neither appropriate nor helpful coming from a trainer; that just does not motivate. It sounds like the wrong match, really. If he continues in that vein, I'd definitely ask to be matched with a different trainer.

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FIREFLUTTERFLY 1/31/2012 1:47PM

    I think it may be time to talk to the organizer and get a different trainer. You two obviously don't mesh and your workouts should not be causing you more stress than they are relieving (kind of counterproductive, ya know) You are paying for this, yes? If so you have every right to tell them "I'd like to have a new trainer assigned to me, this guy is not working"

This is one of those things that should be completely about your needs. It's your body, it's your money, it's your sanity!

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BSTAKINGACTION 1/31/2012 1:37PM

    Uh. Yeah. Totally unprofessional and WRONG. You are so right to stick up for yourself here. Remember, your sparkfriends will behind you if you need to confront!

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NATPLUMMER 1/31/2012 1:34PM

    I agree. Insults are definitely not welcome!! emoticon

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Calorie Budget

Saturday, January 28, 2012

No matter what my calorie budget (range) is set at, I seem to have to overspend my amount. Like I HAVE to spend it. Apparently, the calories in my mind do not rollover to the next day.

Does anyone have this problem? Where they MUST spend ALL calories?

Sadly, it resembles my checking account. Maybe if I could get a handle on the calories, it could carry over to my checkbook!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 1/30/2012 1:41PM

  Hi Savannah.......
Like 1CRAZYDOG, I watch the entire week and average out the total calories. I do keep a daily eye on what is going on, but also realize that I can adjust the amount of calories consumed over the next few days to get back on track. I have to admit that Tracking my food is what really keeps me honest and losing. The minute I start to get lazy re: tracking, I begin to gain. emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 1/29/2012 12:55PM

    Great blog! I tend to look at the calories/nutrition daily, but am MOST concerned about the trend. IF calories are over budget daily, there's a problem, but if it's a day or two, then you work around it the rest of the week so it averages out. That is, as mentioned, as long as you are getting the calories in to meet your metabolic needs with exercise! Don't short change yourself.

How did your Run for Life go yesterday????? Hope it was good.

HUGS!
Barb

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BAM0827 1/29/2012 12:53PM

    I don't think it's a bad thing to stay at the upper end of your calories but I understand what you're saying because it's almost like a mental thing - more than a physical. Your head knows that you "can have more" so you do. My "more" is generally not so great things so I have to be careful.

Maybe make a mini goal - eat at the lower or middle of your range 2-3 times a week... then when you do get a small reward.

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ONEKIDSMOM 1/29/2012 12:35PM

    Depending on your training schedule, you may need every last calorie, Savannah! Especially as you are increasing mileage toward that marathon. Wow... a full marathon. Bet you don't have time to "play" with things like ice skates.

Good luck, and nourish well! emoticon

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EJOY-EVELYN 1/28/2012 11:31PM

    My only concern with not using all your calories is that if you regularly fall too close to 1000 calories a day, while working out, you're putting your metabolism at risk of not being where it needs for you to be at your peak. With Weight Watchers we get a bonus allotment each week . . . if you stay at the low-end of your ranges regularly, then a minor going over should cause much trouble.

If you're going over, then the best things to do is try to buy more filling foods that leave you satisfied so you don't continually go back to the pantry for more when you're truly satisfied. One of my favorites is making a hearty broth-based veggie soup or keeping some fresh freggies nearby to satisfy your appetite. I also like 4 ounces of cottage cheese with fruit or tomatoes. The only problem with these two recommendations is that your sodium intake may affect your water weight and number at the scale. Sometimes when you're hungry, you're really thirsty and water is a great way to re-hydrate.

Hope it comes together for you.

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NATPLUMMER 1/28/2012 11:29PM

    They are there for you to use. As long as using the limit doesn't have any adverse effects, I don't think it should be a problem. No, I don't have the compulsion to get to the high end but there are some days that I do.

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Proud Moment: Attended the Y's Muscle Pump Class

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Today I am proud.

I went to Muscle Pump, a group exercise class that intimidates me. Also, I hate doing something for the first time alone. But, today, I did! emoticon

For the class itself, I probably won't be back. There were a handful of exercises I couldn't do and it drives me nuts when the instructor doesn't give ways to modify. My core is rather weak and I simply cannot do side planks or anything really on the ball.

I wish I could find a group exercise strength training class that I LOVE. But, time after time, I feel disappointed in myself because I cannot do those exercises. I did love kettle bells - maybe I should look into those again.

I did hire a trainer at the Y. Before I could talk to my boss, who assigns the trainers, I was 'given' to my friend who I didn't really want to get trained by. Lately, it's ALL about me and he simply never asks about me. As a client, I don't want to deal with that. Putting personal feelings aside, he is a good trainer and I hope in the next 12 weeks, 1 session/week, that I can really get stronger. I think I am aiming for 2 strength training sessions.

The hopeful part of me wishes I could lose 2# a week and get into the 140s. But, the realistic part of me knows that's not possible. My motivation to do that is not there. As part of my marathon training and to get my eating back on track, I started to track my food again today. Blah.

One way or another I AM getting stronger! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 1/28/2012 3:29PM

  Sounds like you are on the right TRACK all the way around!!!

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FIREFLUTTERFLY 1/27/2012 1:56PM

    have you tried either asking to have your trainer switched or talking to you friend and communicating your specific needs? maybe that would make the next 12 weeks a little better.

Good on ya for working on getting stronger! I find that I love the way I feel after lifting weights.

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ERIKA05 1/27/2012 1:38PM

    Good for you for trying out that class. It's really frustrating when the insructors don't give options. I take a similar class at my gym, and the instructor generally suggests at least 2 levels of difficulty for each of the basic moves - not that hard to do, really.

I hope that the training sessions with your friend go well and that the focus comes back to you, the client in this case. Even if both parties are committed to being professional, it's hard to draw that line sometimes. If you don't find you're getting enough out of it, and/or your sessions include long, self-focused monologues on his part, I would speak to your boss about making a change. There are tons of ways to do it without creating the impression that he's a bad trainer or isn't doing his job.

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1CRAZYDOG 1/26/2012 8:34PM

    If the tracking works, then at least keep it up for a little while.

I find that tracking is important for me. When I don't, the eating portions just get way out of hand.

Well, hoping your Friday is fantastic!

HUGS!
Barb

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CASSCAMP 1/26/2012 8:02PM

    Yeah i am back to tracking as well. sorry you didnt like your class you tried today but kudos for trying it alone. i also hate trying stuff alone. Keep it up girl!!

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NATPLUMMER 1/26/2012 6:32PM

    Food tracking is key!! You'll get there. Good for you trying the class even if it isn't one that you'd want to go back to. Kettlebells would be a good class.

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ABSOLUTZER0 1/26/2012 5:38PM

    Food tracking works wonders in the fight to remain healthy. Getting stronger? It's just that strength on the inside starting to show up on the outside. It's always been there!

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Mentally Ready, Training Program Set, Let's Go!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

As some of you may know, I am one of the running coaches for a running program at the Y. The levels in the program include 5K, Half Marathon, and Full Marathon. After last Saturday, I started to get pressure to join them. Weighing the pros and cons, I decided to join them.

One reason I was hestiate to join the Saturday runs with the group was the full marathon program were at a higher running mileage level than I was ready for. I knew if I tried to them, I'd be asking for injury. Um, no, thanks!

I talked to the trainer that was in charge of them. Even through I struggle with sharing the leadership with the program with her, I do value her opinion as she has done many marathons. She mentioned I could train with the half marathon group and make up the difference within the same day on my own because it's total miles run.

For me, that was a win-win!

One of the reasons I was weighing if I wanted to join was I like my alone time to run. This way I can be part of the group but still have some time to de-stress from life.

With the training program set and planned, I signed up for Get Lucky Triple 7 (Half Marathon) on St. Patrick's Day. Good thing my outside top is teal (green). I, also, signed up for Eau Claire Half Marathon in May. I guess this means I am committed.

Putting the nerves aside, I am getting excited to train. Isn't that crazy? Excited to train!? I did two miles outside today and there were even snowy parts. It was 30s but definitely need to find a layer for my legs. I am wondering if I should try to stick my compression capris underneath.

Happy Running! emoticon

Or walking, kayaking, zumba-ing... whatever you are enjoy!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 1/28/2012 3:26PM

  emoticon!!!!! You are doing such a great job!!!

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1CRAZYDOG 1/26/2012 8:31PM

    Good for you!

How are you doing? Sounds like things are falling in to place for you. WooHOoo!

Crazy around here. The man who owned the restaurant DS works @ died suddenly today. Diabetic, didn't take care of himself. In his 50's. OK, that part his a little too close to home for me!

So, anyway, glad you sound better.

HUGS!

Barb

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JUSTBIRDY 1/26/2012 10:08AM

    emoticon

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MYLADY4 1/26/2012 8:57AM

    That's awesome. Might have to got to Eau Claire and cheer you on. Carson park is a really nice park but there are a couple of not fun hills. At least, I do not like running the hills.

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FIREFLUTTERFLY 1/25/2012 9:40PM

    Good for you for finding a solution that gets you out there, but keeps you uninjured!
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ELDORADO_MOM 1/25/2012 9:22PM

    Congrats on the commitment!

I also can't wait for warmer weather outside...

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ABSOLUTZER0 1/25/2012 8:34PM

    Excited to train does NOT sound crazy! It sounds perfectly normal to me. You're going to do great!

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NATPLUMMER 1/25/2012 7:43PM

    Great idea! IT sounds like a win-win!!


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CASSCAMP 1/25/2012 6:42PM

    I hit my first 3 miles running yesterday. But I was on a treadmill. Im waiting to start training outside til it is a little warmer.

You are such a motivator. Keep doing it girl! You rock!

Comment edited on: 1/25/2012 6:42:58 PM

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Update: Taking the first step is sometimes the hardest!

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

It feels like it has been forever since I wrote a blog. I guess life got a little too crazy.

Yesterday I started classes again. This semester should be my last semester of full classes. During the summer, I am taking one more. Than, in the fall semester, I will be doing my internship. Than, off to the real world! emoticon

Besides classes starting, I registered and paid for two major events in my life (as some of you may know from my status).

On February 4th, I will be taking the ACE (American Council of Exercise) Personal Training certification exam. Wowster! That is intense and crazy! Hopefully this weekend I can play some catch up on getting prepared!

The other event is definitely monumental. On June 16th, I will be running in Grandma's Marathon as my first FULL marathon! Wowster! Initially, I thought maybe I was being stubborn and jumped the gun. But, I CAN and WILL do this! Besides, it is a local race for me so I will have MANY friends in the crowds and in the race with me!

In preparation for the full marathon, I am hoping to sign up for 3 half marathon or longer races.
- Get Lucky in Minneapolis on St. Patrick's Day (Half Marathon)
- Eau Claire Half Marathon in first part of May
- Stillwater Marathon which is a couple weeks before Grandma's

In addition to this, I have to get applying to the internships I want.. like now.

If this isn't all to deal with, the guy who I am house/dog sitting for comes back today. For me, that means doing laundry, packing and cleaning the house between classes before he gets back tonight!

So, that's my update for now.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATRICIAANN46 1/28/2012 3:23PM

  HI Savannah.........
WOW!!!!!!!! What a busy schedule!!!!!!!!! It is a reminder of my Senior year in college. I don't think I could have packed one more thing in. I know that you will succeed in all you have planned because you are so determined to do your best. Just take good care of yourself throughout.

And, Yes, that Senior moment really did happen.
Later......
Patti

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JENN26POINT2 1/24/2012 5:02PM

    You are definitely dedicated!! You rock! I can't wait to read the blog about your first full!

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MISSFORTE 1/24/2012 3:09PM

    Wow! Congrats on your dedication!

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EJOY-EVELYN 1/24/2012 2:30PM

    These are some terrific strides you have made toward healthy living and career advancement. Nearing the completion of your degree is intense as all these forces (studies, conferences, internships, presentations and other student activities -- academic and social) come together, mixed with with work (financial requirement) and your personal healthy living goals to continually build healthy while incorporating the balance we often get through our faith walk).

You have youth and determination on your side as I know I couldn't handle all that pressure at this stage of my life. Just know that taking care of yourself now to be able to fully enjoy the benefits of retirement should also be tucked into your long-term plans (influencing your here and now). I so love this stage and appreciate the many blessings around me . . . this includes your friendship! Do whatever it takes to remain as focused on your priorities . . . this is what I call being a faithful steward of your talents and resources. And, may you have a lot of joy in this incredible journey. I love your resourcefulness in finding some great balance amidst the chaos.

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WENDYSPARKS 1/24/2012 1:34PM

    Congratulations and good luck!!

Wendy emoticon

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KKINNEA 1/24/2012 1:19PM

    Girl, come run Get Lucky with me! I'm already signed up and could use a push on course :)

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ABSOLUTZER0 1/24/2012 1:14PM

    Yes, YOU GOT THIS! I wish you the best on your exam. Be sure not to study too hard. As for Grandma's, you are going to ROCK IT! I wish I could be there to see you cross the finish line. Enjoy the half marathons you have leading up to it. "Finish. Leave Nothing!"



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FIREFLUTTERFLY 1/24/2012 1:13PM

    wow! look at you go!!! I'm not anywhere close to ready for a full (or even a half!) marathon yet, you're an inspiration for going after 2 of each this year!
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NATPLUMMER 1/24/2012 1:08PM

    Good plan!! Are you going to use the Stillwater marathon as a training run?

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