Friday, January 06, 2012
As many of you guys know, I have been struggling with settling on a 2012 goal/resolution.
Finally, I got it!
Every race I run in 2012... whether it is 1 or 12... will be for a cause. Most races are a fundraiser for a cause, usually research, but some are not. I really want to focus my energy and yes, money, on a worthy cause.
My Grandma sparked this idea for me back in June, the day I showed her my half marathon medal. She asked what was it for... like what cause. As far as I know, my half marathon had no advertised cause.
Keeping that in mind, all day long I saw people dressed in purple. By the end of the race, I learned these people were members of Team-in-Training. Team-in-Training raises money for cancer (leukemia, I believe) research. In fact, since that conversation with my Grandma, it has been on my bucket list to become a Team-in-Training participant. Right now, I do not have the time commitment or money. But, someday, I will.
Besides my Grandma sparking me, I found it empowering to do 5Ks in 2011 that had a cause. You see, when you are waiting around at a race, you start to hear inspiring stories. It is no longer about you or running or your best time. It is about raising money so people do not have live with cancer or diseases that have no cure.
In the past, some races I have completed for has raised money for Lupus research, housing for parents for children that need to stay in ICU, and rising money for a scholarship for non-traditional women attending college.
This will be a good challenge for 2012. Finding 5Ks with a cause should be fairly easy but for some reason, it seems finding a half marathon will be a bit tougher. Down the road, I might have to alter the goal from every race run for a worthy cause to 12 races ran for worthy causes in 2012.
Either way, I will be helping worthy causes with running. Won't that be nice?
Tuesday, January 03, 2012
In the last month or so, it seems like my control on food portions is out of hand. And, the holidays sure didn't help matters! When I was at 260, I could mindlessly eat a cake pan or a pizza and realize AFTER I ate it. When that happens now, it scares me. Even after losing all this weight, I realize I will always have some demons to fight.
Anyways, back to topic at hand, I decided I want... no, need.. to get the control of my eating, whether it is healthy or junk food. I need to have control of ME. To do this, I decided for the month of January I would try to track food 21 of the 31 days.
Yesterday was day 1 of tracking again. It went okay. At times, I was forgetful that I had to track foods. At the end of the day, I had 200 calories left.
Today I have been trying to track again sporadically. This has been harder. I try to make alot of my meals at home. With doing that, you have to remember to measure. Than, I decided to make chili! Since it is not from a recipe, I do not know how many servings it is. I want to say 4-5. But, when you are trying to determine how many calories is in each serving, that extra serving can be a huge calculating factor. Anyone know how to solve this issue?
Besides that, today I really noticed how much I mindlessly snack without measuring out the proper portion. It's crazy. With needing to track food, I need to measure these fruit and veggie snacks out.
In the last year or so, I have tried tracking again. I seem to get frustrated because like my chili issue. Instead I have been trying to listen to my body and when I am actually hungry. Maybe I will have a mini-goal of getting to Day 7 of tracking. That really helped when I did it with my fitness.
Talking of which, I haven't worked out since the New Years. Sunday.. I drove home. Monday.. worked all day. I know excuses. But.. today I hope to work out after Run for Life's Greet and Meet meeting.
Sunday, January 01, 2012
This weekend I went to my Grandma's Christmas. Now, that I have lost 100# and missed Christmas last year, they act like I am the prodigal child that has returned after many years. I find it so amusing. My sister even noticed it.
Besides the drama with the family, it was nice to see everyone.
Of course, I ate way too much. Lately, it seems I have no self control whatsoever! It is actually very scary. I eat everything in sight. Like I did before I lost the weight. I am seeing very clearly how someone could gain all the weight again.
I tell my friends and family. They have the attitude that it is not a big deal. It's a big deal. Especially to me.
Sometimes they even comment about how I am skinny, small, blah, blah, blah. At one time I might have cared about that but not anymore. Sometimes I wish it still made my day to get one more pound down. But, it doesn't. What makes my day now? Overcoming something that I didn't think I could do. The unachievable goals. It's empowering for me.
Maybe that is why weight loss made my day before. I never thought I could even lose 5# so everyday that I went down even more it was proving to myself I can do it.
After that, it was proving to myself I can run a half marathon. There were a lot of doubts that I couldn't do it.. but I did.
So, basically, I need to find something I believe is unachievable and prove to myself I can do it.
That seems kinda backward, doesn't it? Another way of looking at it is I need a challenge.
Hmm.. let's see. What goals do I have which I believe are unachievable right now?
Becoming a Half Marathon Fanatic (Nicholas has inspired me!)
Running a full marathon.
Running Team Ortho Series during 2012 (Get Lucky, Minneapolis Marathon, Go Commando, Monster Dash)
The first two would be awesome but I do not feel my running is up to par for that. Also, mentally, I am just not ready for that.
But, the last one.. just maybe it could be a fun challenge. I can even pay for all the races at one time, at the end of this month. No excuses.
My 2012 goal was going to be 1000 miles, and 140 goal weight. But, everytime I think about them, they kinda put me to sleep.
So, I think my 2012 goal is going to the Ortho Team Series.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Have you ever listened to the same song over and over? In the beginning, it was great, awesome. Initially, it energized you. But, say after the 100th time of hearing the sound, it bored you to tears.
That is where I am with life right now. I guess it only makes sense. I have been living the same for the past few years. At first losing weight and running was a challenge making it real exciting. Now, it isn't. Even school at times was challenging. Not saying it isn't anymore. But, it is ending.
I need to find myself a BIG challenge. Something I can continue to work on everyday like I did with my weight loss. Last year it was running a half marathon.
Maybe this year I could do a full marathon. How does one know if it is too early to train for it? Oh, I know what you are thinking. Yes, I haven't run consistently but I think that is because I have no goal. When I have a goal, I am determined and driven. When I don't, I am a lost soul, wandering around aimless.
I have already decided on my 2012 goals but I think I am going to revamp them. So I am super excited about them. The only part I am excited about is 12 races in 2012.
What are your goals for 2012? I may have to borrow.
Monday, December 26, 2011
On the behalf of all the daughters and sons out there, I want to tell parents that patience and understanding is sometimes all we want/need when we call home in a stressed situation, like locking our keys in our car after a long day at work. We don't necessary need you to be the hero of the day. Sometimes all we want is a hug and some reassurance as if we were 5 years old and skinned our knee.
When we bring up ways that it could be prevented, like ordering our AAA card like you said you would, we are not placing blame at your feet about the situation. No, we are simply saying, "Hey, could you call the company so the solution is resolved quicker next time?" And, most likely there will be a next time.
Accusing me of yelling and telling me not to treat you that way does not help either. It adds more stress and makes me feel even worse. Just accept we are stressed out. Maybe about more than just locking our keys in the car. Like, maybe we are stressed out that if campus safety opens our car, it is going to cost $20 and we only have a few dollars in our bank account. We are not trying to be hurtful. Stay calm and I will be able stay more under control.
Again, I am not placing blame at your feet. Sometimes these stressful situations cannot be prevented. In the future, you help by:
1. Staying calm.
2. Not accusing me of blaming anyone.
3. If you MUST help, give me a hug and reassure me that everything WILL be okay.
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