Saturday, November 13, 2010
Recently Sparkpeople had a poll asking if you current or have worked out with a buddy in the past. I took the poll and answered that I have buddy. Over the next day or so, I gave this some thought.
In the beginning, I worked out with my friend, Will. Over time, he started to say he couldn't go with me. I continued on without him. Since than, a two year span, I have worked out with basically myself. This was my me time to work out my frustrations, to think, or even read my smut, ah, romance books. Once and a great while a friend would want to work out with me. It'd work for a couple times but eventually, they didn't want to. Again, I would continue on without them.
Well, this week I have been more annoyed with people more than usual. I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Last night, I just wanted to be away from like most everyone.. and today, I won't be hanging out with anyone until like 5ish when I go to Cultural Night. It wasn't until after my workout that I figured it out.
My workouts this week have been with people or rushed. This means NO me time for.. well.. ME. In the last couple weeks, I have been running with my friend which is great fun. This is where we catch up. On the other hand, the time where I clear my head is gone.
Anyhow, I found it ironic that in the beginning I needed someone to work out with and now I'd just prefer to work out with ME. It gives me time to think and straighten things out.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Today, I was chatting with an old friend, the same one that helped me start my weight loss, and he said this: "I heard u lost more weight and are looking better." I am trying to not let it bother me... but... it does. The part that really bothers me is.. looking better. Better than what? I'm sorry but I didn't have to lose weight to be an amazing person. I felt like it was an insulting compliment. Deep breath in, deep breath out.
Let's say some nice compliments to myself.
You are amazing... inside and out... always have been!
You have a bright future to hang onto old friends that do not embrace that!
You are excited to learn new things... like kettle bells!
Okay... I am done with all that jazz. Now, off to learn kettle bells and self defense.
Whoa.. I am SO tired from my 4 mile morning run. I am going to be SO tired tonight. Oh, by the way, guys, I got a B on my A & P test on muscles. That means I understand and know 80% of how muscles work!
Saturday, November 06, 2010
A few weeks ago, I worked out with my friend and she basically had me be a personal trainer for her. I loved it. I loved knowing what to do and being the person that she trusted. It was great but I didn't think much of it.
Than, last night a different friend asked if I wanted to work out with her. She called me an expert. Me? An expert? Really? I don't feel like an expert. Yeah, I have lost a chunk of weight. Yeah, I have learned alot of "tricks" on the way. But, I still struggle with motivation. I still have trouble with eating right. We went today and I got to be all personal trainer with her. I LOVED it! It was alot of fun to teach her how to work out effectively and to know she WILL get results with my help. I do wish I had more knowledge but that is easy enough to fix considering I am an Exercise Science major!
These experience got me thinking. I really do want to be "The Expert". Once I graduate, I think I could be a successful personal trainer... for many reasons. I have been there. I know how it is to be awkward and unsure of what you are doing. I get it. It's unbelievable. I have had SO many people be like you can practice on me. I might have to start taking them up on their offers. They could give me feedback and I could be one rockin' personal trainer!
In addition to that, a friend is going to teach me how to use kettle bells which I have wanted to learn for a few months now! In addition to that, I still want to be a Zumba instructor after thinking about it after the conference excitement settled. I know both of these jobs would be great part-time side jobs to get me where I want to go. Let's be honest.. they probably never will be secure, full-time positions but I think I'd love them nonetheless. If I decide to go to graduate school and become a Physical Therapist, they could help me pay the way! Win-win!!!
Update on No-weigh November:
I weighed in today. I maintained (with sodium retention going on). I think it is a in itself that I didn't weigh in all week. If nothing else, I wouldn't mind getting in the habit of weighing in on Sunday. For now, I am trying to not weigh in all November with a "possible" peek on Sundays.
Thursday, November 04, 2010
In northern Wisconsin, sometimes the hunters do something called no-shave November. As you can guess, it is when they don't shave all month. I think they do this to stay warm when they are out hunting.. because it can get pretty cold out in Wisconsin and Minnesota while hunting.
In the last couple days, I was thinking.. what if I applied this to my weight loss? What if I didn't weigh in all month? This is a really scary concept for me as I am a scale-olic. I weigh in nearly everyday or at least every other day. Just more and more, I worry about the number. Yes, I want to lose weight but I think I need a break from all the worry.
For example, last night, I went out for Chinese and I was really NOT looking forward to weighing in this morning. So, I didn't. I don't want to know. Shouldn't I be working toward feeling strong, energized and, overall, happy?
Also, sometimes it feels like I am working to burn the calories, not because I enjoy working out. And, I do enjoy working out.. now. I know I have been getting bored with my workouts.. or rather the elliptical. I love to run. I like to swim. I am enjoying my self defense class. I think I am going to try to take a break from the elliptical. Lately, I have heard alot about spinning and how it improves your running. I might give that a whirl.
Anyhow, here are my November goals.
-To not weigh in
-To measure weekly (every Monday) - Thanks KATE453
-To strength train regularly
-To exercise for the love of it
-To keep my depression in check
-To stay in my range on most days
Maybe I am ready for the maintenance stage mentally.. just not at it physically.
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
I judge people. Basically, I judge people that used to judge me in High School. Is it right? No. Not at all. But, after years of teasing, I have found that I judge them. Who are they? They are the atheletes and jocks. Isn't that ironic? I am kinda one of them. They part of my major. I see them everyday in my classes. Honestly, I am not sure if I want anything to do with them. Basically, I am not giving them a chance because my experiences in High School. That is not right. But, on the other hand, I am not sure how to give them a chance. I have scars that jocks have left. Mind you, I know they are most likely VERY nice people. In fact, I learned this past weekend, two hockey players were quite nice.
In addition to this, I realized this week I somehow cannot act myself in groups of people. But, if I get one on one with people, I am fine.. but in a group? Uh-uh.. no way, jose! I've tried to act like ME in a group but I just cannot. I just seem to not relax and get it together enough.
By the way, I emailed my counselor today. Yup, that is right. I think I gotta go back. It is just not going away and I think I need help. I dunno. I think this is what I want to work on. How to be more accepting of them and be able to ask as ME in a group.
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