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The Key To Happiness...

Tuesday, April 08, 2014

How come certain people expect other people to make them happy, when they can not even find happiness in themselves? It is unfair for anyone to expect another person to make them happy. Such behavior only leads to disappointment, and instead results in not just them being unhappy, but the other person being unhappy as well.

I have found that the key to happiness, is to allow yourself to be happy, no matter what your situation is. Single, or as a couple... Employed or retired... Surrounded by people, or alone... Your happiness can be found in either state... if you allow it.

I also found that you should not limit yourself to what can make you happy. Often we think that certain things, people, or occurrences are needed to make us happy. The problem with that way of thinking, is that it then limits our ability for happiness.

I have since found that the things, people, and occurrences that I thought I needed to have happen to be happy, did not give me true happiness. I also discovered happiness from many sources, that I never expected to find happiness from. The most shocking discovery of all?... It was the unexpected things and occurrences that made me the happiest.

So... the lesson in all this rambling... You yourself, are ultimately responsible for your own happiness.

If you place your happiness solely onto the shoulders of another person, then you limit your happiness to that persons ability to make you happy, and place a very heavy burden on that person, leaving them ultimately feeling unhappy as well. And If you limit what brings you happiness, your happiness will be limited as well.

So... look for happiness in all the situations and things and people that are around you, and you likely will be surprised in just how happy you can actually be.

HUGS emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PANFRIEDTROUT 4/8/2014 10:35PM

interesting thought

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BABY_GIRL69 4/8/2014 6:08PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon God bless, Dee

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    I agree MJRVIC2000. For me, that is true. That is partly why I say that we should not limit our chances for happiness on people and things. They too often will let us down. God's love tho, is forever, and will never let us down.

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MJRVIC2000 4/8/2014 2:06PM

    Happiness comes from knowing Christ and following Him! God Bless YOU! Vic.

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Are you making it hard for yourself to lose weight?

Monday, September 09, 2013

So many of my friends say that it is too hard to lose weight, so they won't even try.

I guess it depends on what type of approach you take with weight loss. It is true... weight loss can be difficult, if you make it difficult. Over the years, I have found that it is your approach to weight loss, that makes it either easy or difficult.

If you will almost punish yourself, and severely cut calories, and exercise like mad... then yes... it will be difficult to maintain such a lifestyle, and lose the weight.

However... if you relax, and commit to a lifestyle change, which involves what is in fact a minor cut to what your caloric needs would be to maintain your weight... then you will find it is much easier. I myself have been doing this, and in 4 years, I have lost and kept off about 200 pounds.

All you need to cut, is about 300 calories a day from what you would need to maintain your weight, and do the equivalent of about 10 minutes of walking a day, and you will lose about 1 pound a week.
To put that into context... 1 pound a week will result in 56 pounds a year. The best thing about dieting this way, is that you do not even feel like you are dieting, yet you are losing weight steadily... and who would not be happy with that?

So... would you rather do it the hard way... or the easy way?

Think about it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TXPATRIOT 9/10/2013 12:10AM

    Wow! Congrats on your weight loss!

I totally agree with your blog. After doing it wrong many years, it is amazing what you can do if you have the right perspective.


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LALATIDAH 9/9/2013 8:06PM

    I love your positivism! You have to DO something to make something change!
I have been actively trying to lose weight since Feb and have lost 18 lbs so far. That's not much, but it's alot based on the way I've been doing it. I don't believe in "diets" or "diet-aids". I'm allergic to artificial sweeteners. So, my "helps" are nil. I added exercise & have made myself very aware of portion control. I still eat and drink (alcohol is my downfall) the same things, but in lesser quantities. After having been in a wheelchair, unable to walk, due to severe sciatica, I gained 60 lbs. I couldn't exercise for almost 10 years. Now that I am ALMOST pain-free, as long as I keep exercising, I can now concentrate on losing this flabby belly!
I'm glad to hear someone speaking out on a positive note and not being a "Debbie Downer"! Thanks!
Wishing you great success in our mutual journey to good health!
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    Ha.... for me its not excerise or what I eat. Its all about how much! Portion control is my biggest enemy. But my wife and I found a helpful idea. Smaller plates. Easy simple, and no overeating - which helps make that caloric deficit. Thats the easy route for us!

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    I vote for the easy way!

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What is Charity, And Who Should We Help?

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

This is just about something I have been contemplating for a long time... What is charity, and who should we help... My thoughts repeatedly lead me to these verses in Matthew...

Matthew 25:35-40
English Standard Version (ESV)

35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me,
36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’
37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink?
38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you?
39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’
40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’

When we think of helping others, (for charity), we often think of the poor, or those who are in need financially. Is money the only thing that we need to give in order to help others? Who should we help? Who is it that needs help? How often tho, do we think of helping those who may appear outwardly, to be better off than us? Should we help those better of financially than us? Think about it... in the above verses... does it say single out only the poor to help?

I say... it does not! I say, it tells us to care for (love) any who are in need. Well... who else but people that are without wealth, would need anyone's help you may ask? Well... first you need to realize, that not all needs are based on money. Some needs may be physical or mental needs. What about the sharing of our time?

Consider these situations...

- A lonely person (any age), with no family. They may have enough money to be comfortable, and live in a nice home, but that does not buy them friends, or company to keep them from feeling the pain of being alone. We can offer them help, by visiting them occasionally, and offering them friendship, and maybe try inviting them to join you in an activity.

- A person who recently is divorced, and is struggling to make sense of what has happened in their life. We can listen to them, as they talk about how they feel over this change in their life.

- A person has recently become widowed, or has lost a child to illness or an accident. We can be a shoulder for them to cry on, and offer them the comfort of our company.

-A person who is from a different country or region, who is either visiting or has recently moved to live in your town / city. They often do not know anyone, and do not know the area they now live in. We can offer them friendship, and help them get to know the community. We can include them in activities, so that they can meet new people, and get to know what resources are available in the community.

-A person is struggling with their faith. It can be for any reason... They may have had a brush with the law, and be in prison, or they may feel they are on the brink of doing something desperate. In order to make sense of what they are going through, they may seek God. We can help them, by being there and helping them seek the answers from God, by guiding them through passages in the Bible.

-A neighbour may have lost their pet. We can help them look for the pet.

-A persons car may have broken down in the middle of the road. We can offer to phone a tow truck for them, or offer them some water or coffee to drink, or just stay with them, while they wait for someone to come collect them and their car.

In each of these cases, we are not giving the people our money. Instead, we are asked to share our time. Remember the verses above? Remember where it said... "I was a stranger, and you welcomed me", "I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’"... How often we seem to forget that part of those verses...

So... In those words quoted, we see that charity involves more than just money. It involves time. And our time is something most people can appreciate, and may need... both those who are poor regarding money, as well as those who have an abundance of money.

Thus... we should consider helping all people... Because while some may have money, they may be poor in other ways... such as faith, strength, courage, or friendship... things that involve time... And after all... Time is the most precious thing we can share with anyone...

Think about it...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    This made me think. All this is so true. I remember my dad and mom reading this passage from the bible when I was young and I kept it with me now I'm married and as an adult. Thanks for putting this out there!

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EAGLES_WINGS 5/17/2012 1:10PM

    You are so right about the spirit of giving. I don't have a lot of money but I like to talk to people when I can. Sometimes when I know someone is in need I try to help out with what little things I can. I also try to cheer people up with cards that I make either on the computer or from hand. I have a genuine love for people and try to get to know others here in my building and just be supportive. I have some anxiety and that makes sometimes reaching out difficult but I still try to do it as much as possible. Also, I am sick a lot so I try to reach out to friends on the computer and on the phone and be as nice as possible to people when going to my doctor's appointments. Sometimes, just a positive attitude is contributing to the welfare of others in such a difficult world at times. Sending you love and thanks! Peace be with you!
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TESTYCATLADYP 5/16/2012 5:08PM

    MI-ELLKAYBEE Sometimes just a kind word or a smile will do. That is why I say... charity or giving, does not always need to involve money... Sometimes it just needs to be letting others know you care. And we do not have to journey to distant areas in order to help others. We can help those who are in our community. The point is, to show we care.

Before you say I could not know what it is like... Just know... I am on a very limited pension for various disabilities. I may not have a wealth of money, or a strong body, but my spirit and desire to help, can still make a difference in someone's life.

Comment edited on: 5/16/2012 5:13:55 PM

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MI-ELLKAYBEE 5/16/2012 2:47PM

    Your ideas are so gracious and kind. But it is truly hard to give - when you don't have enough money for gas to drive to a site where your help is needed - when you don't have enough to eat - when all of your time is spent struggling to figure out how to survive with no income, an elderly parent to support, and your days are so filled with financial desperation that it even hurts to smile. I never believed in giving money to big organizations (back when I had it) because SO MUCH of it went to the organization and so little to people who needed it desperately. I always preferred to just HELP someone I knew was struggling. I did it when I could - but there is no one there for me. Emotionally, my Spark Friends are my lifeline.

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CMCBRIDE37 5/16/2012 12:16PM

    Thanks for the lovely things to think about.

I happen to volunteer once a week with an organization that houses Wish Kids and their families for their vacation to the Orlando area. It is called Give Kids the World. The wish is for the child with the life threatening illness of course but it actually is a week for the whole famiy...to make memories, to forget the illness, to have a vacation like no other.

The Give Kids the World Resort Village has so many activities and amenities they wouldn't even need to leave the resort to have a nice vacation but they do go to the attractions and come home to the village to relax. It takes 1200 to 1500 3 to 4 hour shifts to run the fun.

I love it there. I love that my one piece of volunteering (usually serving breakfast, which they get free meals at the resort) makes someone's overall memory of that week special times. I enjoy spreading love by carrying a tray full of food to the table or serving food in the food line or wiping and bussing tables if that is my job that week. We all have something to give and opportunities are everywhere.

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Do you just talk the talk, or do you walk the walk as well?

Saturday, May 12, 2012

For us who are Christians... Do you just talk the talk, or do you walk the walk as well? Often we feel that we can get by with just faith alone, and forget that in order to practice our "faith", we need to do the actions that we are called in faith to do.

Consider these examples, given in Hebrews 11...

Hebrews 11
New International Version (NIV)
Faith in Action

1 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

2 This is what the ancients were commended for.

3 By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.

4 By faith Abel brought God a better offering than Cain did. By faith he was commended as righteous, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead.

5 By faith Enoch was taken from this life, so that he did not experience death: “He could not be found, because God had taken him away.”For before he was taken, he was commended as one who pleased God.

6 And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

7 By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that is in keeping with faith.

8 By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.

9 By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise.

10 For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.

11 And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered him faithful who had made the promise.

12 And so from this one man, and he as good as dead, came descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as countless as the sand on the seashore.

13 All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth.

14 People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own.

15 If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return.

16 Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

17 By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son,

18 even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.”

19 Abraham reasoned that God could even raise the dead, and so in a manner of speaking he did receive Isaac back from death.

20 By faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau in regard to their future.

21 By faith Jacob, when he was dying, blessed each of Joseph’s sons, and worshiped as he leaned on the top of his staff.

22 By faith Joseph, when his end was near, spoke about the exodus of the Israelites from Egypt and gave instructions concerning the burial of his bones.

23 By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.

24 By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter.

25 He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin.

26 He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because he was looking ahead to his reward.

27 By faith he left Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger; he persevered because he saw him who is invisible.

28 By faith he kept the Passover and the application of blood, so that the destroyer of the firstborn would not touch the firstborn of Israel.

29 By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land; but when the Egyptians tried to do so, they were drowned.

30 By faith the walls of Jericho fell, after the army had marched around them for seven days.

31 By faith the prostitute Rahab, because she welcomed the spies, was not killed with those who were disobedient.

32 And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson and Jephthah, about David and Samuel and the prophets,

33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions,

34 quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies.

35 Women received back their dead, raised to life again. There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection.

36 Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment.

37 They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated—

38 the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.

39 These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised,

40 since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

So... Considering what these verses say... Will you just say that you have faith and consider that to be enough, or will you live your faith, and do the actions that are called for, to be children of God?

Also... are you willing to put your faith into action... even if it means you may suffer or do without, as those in the past did?

Think about it.

God bless you, and HUGS

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTYNA7 5/13/2012 11:46AM

    My favourite story is Matthew 8

A Roman army captain comes to Jesus and pleads with him to heal his servant. Jesus says he will come... but the captain says "I am not worthy to have you in my home and it is not necesary for you to come. If you say "be healed" then he will be healed. I am under the authority of my superior over my soldiers and when I say "Go" he goes, and to another "Come" and he comes, and to my servant boy "Do this or that" and does. I know that you have the authority to tell his sickness to go - and it will go." And Jesus is AMAZED at this man, a gentile, at his faith. He says that people like him, (not Christians) will sit down in the Kingston of Heaven with Abraham while many an Isrealite for whom the Kingdom was prepared what be cast into outer darkness into the place of weeping and torment.

This story humbles me. I think I have a relationship with God and I can spend time and energy focusing on that. Envision me sitting in my pew with beams of light vertically between me and God. I think God gets angry when that is all I do. God says to me, OK, so you get the message, now do something about it. And God spreads his arms and sends the beams of light out horizontally. Faith is that up and down, the comfortable and cherishing and reassuring that I have in a personal relationship with Jesus. Works is the horizontal. It's not easy and it is not comfortable and it is WORK. Every time I look at the cross I think of the vertical which I desire, and the horizontal which I believe God desires of me.

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AVANELL 5/12/2012 5:26PM

    James 2:17 Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.

That pretty well explains it!

Thanks for sharing with us!


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TESTYCATLADYP 5/12/2012 12:06PM

    REDSHOES2011... That is what walking the walk is about... Honouring God, with our lives, and actions...

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FATGRAMS61 5/12/2012 11:55AM

    This is great! I just attended a Bible Study recently on this subject. In answer to your challenge, All too often, we (including myself) find ourselves not walking the walk. When our faith is challenged, we fail to get up and do the work that is needed to fullfill his promise to his people....thanks for the blog...it has been inspiring! emoticon

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REDSHOES2011 5/12/2012 11:54AM

    This is the little one with "huge meaning" I follow in life.. God gave his son, he wants us to respect what we still have.. Great summon but- if you want walk the walk- we have to really respect what he gave up..

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body," (1 Cor. 6:19-20).

Comment edited on: 5/12/2012 11:56:08 AM

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Do we who call ourselves Christian, live as if we belong to Jesus?

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

I often wonder about how I am living... Am I living the way I should be, as a child of God, and receiver of God's grace? Am I living according to the ways Jesus has taught me to live? Am I living according to the guidance of the body, or am I living according to the guidance of the Spirit? In Romans 8, we are told that our rewards are determined by how we chose to live. So... will we be ruled by our flesh, or will we let the Spirit guide us?

Often we fall from living the way we should, because we are weak in spirit, or do not have the strength to resist the ways of the body. We may see the rewards of the world, as more tempting than the rewards that wait for us in heaven.

Often we may be made to suffer, in order to follow the ways of the Spirit. But if we keep trying, and continue to strive to live as directed by the Spirit, we are shown in Romans 8, that our reward will be that we shall be recognized as if we are God's own children, and we shall become co-inheritors of God's kingdom in heaven. For as it says in the last verse... Nothing can separate us from God's love for us. God's love for us is eternal.

Romans Chapter 8

1 If you belong to Christ Jesus, you won’t be punished.
2 The Holy Spirit will give you life that comes from Christ Jesus and will set you free from sin and death.
3 The Law of Moses cannot do this, because our selfish desires make the Law weak. But God set you free when he sent his own Son to be like us sinners and to be a sacrifice for our sin. God used Christ’s body to condemn sin.
4 He did this, so that we would do what the Law commands by obeying the Spirit instead of our own desires.

5 People who are ruled by their desires think only of themselves. Everyone who is ruled by the Holy Spirit thinks about spiritual things.
6 If our minds are ruled by our desires, we will die. But if our minds are ruled by the Spirit, we will have life and peace.
7 Our desires fight against God, because they do not and cannot obey God’s laws.
8 If we follow our desires, we cannot please God.

9 You are no longer ruled by your desires, but by God’s Spirit, who lives in you. People who don’t have the Spirit of Christ in them don’t belong to him.
10 But Christ lives in you. So you are alive because God has accepted you, even though your bodies must die because of your sins.
11 Yet God raised Jesus to life! God’s Spirit now lives in you, and he will raise you to life by his Spirit.

12 My dear friends, we must not live to satisfy our desires.
13 If you do, you will die. But you will live, if by the help of God’s Spirit you say “No” to your desires.
14 Only those people who are led by God’s Spirit are his children.
15 God’s Spirit doesn’t make us slaves who are afraid of him. Instead, we become his children and call him our Father.
16 God’s Spirit makes us sure that we are his children.
17 His Spirit lets us know that together with Christ we will be given what God has promised. We will also share in the glory of Christ, because we have suffered with him.

18 I am sure that what we are suffering now cannot compare with the glory that will be shown to us.
19 In fact, all creation is eagerly waiting for God to show who his children are.
20 Meanwhile, creation is confused, but not because it wants to be confused. God made it this way in the hope
21 that creation would be set free from decay and would share in the glorious freedom of his children.
22 We know that all creation is still groaning and is in pain, like a woman about to give birth.

23 The Spirit makes us sure about what we will be in the future. But now we groan silently, while we wait for God to show that we are his children. This means that our bodies will also be set free.
24 And this hope is what saves us. But if we already have what we hope for, there is no need to keep on hoping.
25 However, we hope for something we have not yet seen, and we patiently wait for it.

26 In certain ways we are weak, but the Spirit is here to help us. For example, when we don’t know what to pray for, the Spirit prays for us in ways that cannot be put into words.
27 All of our thoughts are known to God. He can understand what is in the mind of the Spirit, as the Spirit prays for God’s people.
28 We know that God is always at work for the good of everyone who loves him. They are the ones God has chosen for his purpose,
29 and he has always known who his chosen ones would be. He had decided to let them become like his own Son, so that his Son would be the first of many children.
30 God then accepted the people he had already decided to choose, and he has shared his glory with them.

31 What can we say about all this? If God is on our side, can anyone be against us?
32 God did not keep back his own Son, but he gave him for us. If God did this, won’t he freely give us everything else?
33 If God says his chosen ones are acceptable to him, can anyone bring charges against them?
34 Or can anyone condemn them? No indeed! Christ died and was raised to life, and now he is at God’s right side, speaking to him for us.
35 Can anything separate us from the love of Christ? Can trouble, suffering, and hard times, or hunger and nakedness, or danger and death?
36 It is exactly as the Scriptures say,

“For you we face death
all day long.
We are like sheep
on their way
to be butchered.”
37 In everything we have won more than a victory because of Christ who loves us.
38 I am sure that nothing can separate us from God’s love—not life or death, not angels or spirits, not the present or the future,
39 and not powers above or powers below. Nothing in all creation can separate us from God’s love for us in Christ Jesus our Lord!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    We need to surrender, and let the spirit guide us, rather than allow the flesh to rule us.

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MNCYCLIST 5/2/2012 10:48AM

    Our striving is simply this: surrender to him who promises to complete this work he began in us (Phil 1:6). May the Lord be near to us today as we cling to him by grace through faith!

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