TENDRHEARTANGEL   10,796
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TENDRHEARTANGEL's Recent Blog Entries

Got on the scale this morning and almost cried...

Friday, October 07, 2011

tears of JOY!!!!! I finally made it!

I always weigh myself at the same time of day (just after getting up, after using the restroom), and in the same state of dress. And today, my scale showed me 160.0 lbs!!!!! That was my goal....the bottom of the weight range my doctor told me was good for me. When I started this journey, I was in the "obese" catagory at 214 lbs, and now I am near the top of my "healthy" weight range (165 is the top, and the doctor told me he wanted me between 160-165). I have gone from size 16 jeans down to a size 8, and from 1X tops in the plus size section to large/x-large in the misses section. I have changed my weight tracker settings to maintenence mode, but am still going to use my trackers for food/exercise input.

I can't believe I made it! I know 54 lbs isn't a lot, and that there are many people here with much more to lose than that, but for someone with ADHD this was a major struggle. Staying focused was/is very hard for me, as impulsivity/self-control is one of my major ADHD issues.

During this journey, my self-esteem has come up very much. I used to feel like I was good for nothing but a paycheck to my lazy, emotionally abusive, codependent ex-husband, and didn't even have the motivation to put on makeup in the mornings to go to work because I felt like I was destined to be miserable for the rest of my life. I now have more energy and more motivation to take care of myself, because I know how hard it was for me to get where I am now. I am in a much healthier relationship that is progressing well with a man who is wonderful and supportive and can make me feel beautiful just by looking at me. I know I do still have some self-esteem issues to work through, but I now feel like I am worthy of, and deserving of, happiness and love.

As in a previous post I made: Huge thank yous to the SparkPeople staff, my friends on my Sparkteams, and my friends offline, especially Jimmy, who was instrumental in turning my life around! I love you all so very much and can't put into words how much I appreciate your help, dedication, and friendship while I have been going through these changes in my life.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BETTAPRINCESS 10/11/2011 6:11AM

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IRENESH 10/7/2011 10:23PM

    You made it. ..... congratulations


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DANCINCAJUN1 10/7/2011 8:52PM

    TOTALLY AWESOME .... congratulations .... so very proud of you !! Roc
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ADJQUILTER 10/7/2011 8:32PM

    "I know 54 lbs isn't a lot". Don't negate the sweat and tears that went into losing this 54 pounds. It took determination and a lot of hard work. You are to be congratulated. Your reward will be a much healthier you. Keep up the great work!!!!

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KJMAZ2011 10/7/2011 8:13PM

    Congratulations! Don't minimize your success! 54 pounds is fantastic!

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CAROL6X 10/7/2011 8:13PM

    Congratulations!!!!!

Good for you-you got it done. Now you know, you have personally experienced the change in yourself.
Keep it up-stay with it to continue on. This site is great for motivation for all things with your life.

We are the choices that we make. emoticon
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LOSINGITATNIGHT 10/7/2011 8:10PM

    Congratulations, and good luck on your maintenance! :) emoticon

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YAY!!!!!!!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

I did very well today with my eating!

The only nutrient I track that was out of my recommended limits today was my sodium (it was way high, though I am not as concerned with it as I used to be because my blood pressure has come down). Usually, I have too high calories, and too low fat, but today though calories were almost topped out and fat was completely topped out, both were in range. I usually don't have much problem with carbs and protein, and again, both were in range. I usually have problems with calcium and fiber being too low (calcium about 40% of the time and fiber about 95% of the time), but again, they were both in range.

I got them all in range today (except for the sodium). YAY ME!!!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MYLOVEZION 9/24/2011 8:00AM

  emoticon KEEP THAT UP!!

Your doing great! emoticon

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FAITH2BWELL 9/22/2011 3:49AM

    You go girl. Sound like a great day for ya. emoticon

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A big turnaround....and a lot of thanks!

Friday, September 02, 2011

On Feb 27th, 2011, I weighed 214 lbs. Exactly 6 months later, on August 27th, 2011, I weighed 164 lbs. I am a much happier and much healthier person than I was when I started, though I still have about 4 lbs left to go, and am still working on other issues as well. Even though I have not quite reached my goal yet, I needed to put my story on my Sparkpage blog to remind myself that I don't ever want to go back to where I was then, and to thank some very important people for their presence in my life.

For a long time, I had very low self-esteem and was on a downward spiral. I was in an unhappy marriage and was to the point of feeling like all I was good for was bringing home a paycheck. I didn't even have the motivation to put on makeup in the morning before I went to work, and could care even less about what I was putting into my body. I had even started feeling like I should just give up and be resigned to being miserable for the rest of my life.

One of my coworkers stopped that downward spiral by always being there for me whenever I needed someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on. He helped me to feel that maybe there was still hope for happiness in my life. Even though I don't think he realizes it, he went a long way in helping to turn my life around, and I will never be able to repay him for the wonderful friend he has been.

Over the 6 months of my weight loss journey, I have seen many things in my life change for the better. I have lost a total of 50 lbs so far, though I will admit that some of the momentum for that weight loss has been because the ADHD medication I am on (which I started in April) has an appetite suppressant side effect. I am in a much better, much healthier relationship that is the exact opposite of any of my previous abusive and codependent relationships. My self-esteem is getting much better, though I still have some days where I fall a couple of rungs back down the ladder. My ADHD, which had never been controlled before, is slowly coming under a little better control. Physically, my doctor was ecstatic with my weight loss progress when I went to see him yesterday. My blood pressure has come down into normal ranges, and the doctor cut my blood pressure medicine dosage in half, and told me that if it stays down for the next 3 months on the half-dose, he will take me off of it completely.

I have had many other coworkers comment on my weight loss, telling me how incredible I look and asking me how I did it. I give them the Sparkpeople website. Some have joined, others have looked into it. Unfortunately, a lot of them seem to think it is too much work to keep up on the food tracker and message boards, and give up before they can even get started. All I can say is....you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink!

Anyway, I wanted to thank a lot of people for this last 6 months in helping me to turn my life around:

First, I want to thank everyone on the Sparkpeople staff for this website and for all you have done to make it a success, for all the effort and love and hard work you put into it, all for the sake of wanting to see people become healthier and happier.

Next, to my friends on my Sparkteams, I thank you for your support and encouragement, your tips and your ideas. Sometimes I'm not sure what I would do without that connection to others who are sharing similar goals and facing the same problems and dilemmas I face every day on this journey.

And most of all, even though I know he will never read this, I want to say "Thank you, Jimmy!!" You have become one of my best friends and one of the most important people in my life. In many ways, you saved me, if not physically, then you saved my spirit from being completely crushed. For the last 7 months, you have been there to encourage me in many areas of my life, from my weight loss to my divorce to my self-esteem, and for that I owe you so much more than you will ever know. I would never have even gotten started on this journey to a healthier, happier me without your intervention into my downward spiral. And here I am almost to my goal! I love you and will always be there for you, if you should ever need me. I don't know what would have happened to me without you!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FAITH2BWELL 9/3/2011 6:13PM

    You go girl. I'm so proud of you, I'm so encouraged right now, and I'm looking forward to seeing myself at the weight that you have reached, This shows us that we can do anything that we set our mind to do. May you continue to reach whatever goal you set for yourself.

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IRENESH 9/3/2011 12:32AM

    Wow, wonderful! What for an inspirational motivation! You earned all the success, especially it was not easy for you. I am so proud of you! You are so strong!


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Thought I was a gonner for SP!!!!!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

OMGoddess!!! Sunday when I got home from work, my computer had shut down and when I pushed the power button, nothing happened!!! It wouldn't turn back on!!!! Okay Dianne......breathe....LOL. Remembered I had my old computer in the closet....switched out the tower and spent last night and tonight trying to figure out why my DVD drive wouldn't work (had to grab a wire from my third oldest computer that I only keep for spare parts)....Got DVD drive working tonight, and then could install the software for my Internet access....It's been a long HARD 2 1/2 days without my Sparkpeople! And I was totally LOST without my food tracker!

But I have made it back from the depths of "no internet-land", safe and sound.....now I just have to figure out if it was just the power supply that went on my other computer, or if the whole motherboard went down...le sigh! Hopefully it is just the power supply, because if it is the motherboard, I might as well just buy a new laptop and junk these old desktop models...LOL

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TENDRHEARTANGEL 8/18/2011 12:17PM

    Actually, I think I have the whole computer issue figured out now. I got the first tower working again, and about a week later, the computer would boot up, but the monitor wouldn't come up. Figured out that the integrated (on the motherboard, not a separate card) video card had gone out. Took the video card out of my older computer, put it in the newer one, and WHA_LA! Monitor came up! Talked to a computer tech friend of mine and he said the video card going out could have caused the power problem since it is on the motherboard and uses the same chipset...haven't had any problems in the ast 2 weeks! The angel is happy as a clam!! emoticon

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JUDI_CUTIE 8/17/2011 1:25PM

    Glad you made it back!

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IRENESH 7/31/2011 9:36AM

    I am glad you figured out your PC. The food tracker is so important. I don't know what kind of cell phone you have, but androids and other smart phones can get the food tracker application. So when you are on the road on your lunch break, you already can put everything on your mobil food-tracker. I am using my android most of the time, too.

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ARGGGGGH~~~~~~~~~~

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Okay....I am frustrated now! I have lost 42 lbs since February 28. I have 7-12 lbs left to go to get to my ideal 160-165 weight range, and I can't seem to lose any more! My weight has been stuck at 172 for almost 2 weeks now! I have been losing, on abverage, almost 2 lbs a week....then 3 weeks ago, it dropped to 1 lb, now I am just stuck for the last 2 weeks. emoticon emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FAITH2BWELL 7/25/2011 6:47PM

    I agree with both post , also you may want to change your exercise do something different than what you been doing or maybe cut your cal. every other day you know mix it and see if this will help kick things off for you, Here's to wishing you well,
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IRENESH 7/21/2011 4:39PM

    Don't get frustrated. You know there are other ways but the scale to see your progress. Muscles weigh more than body-fat.
Stay motivated, stay on track and you will loose your unwanted pounds.
I am here for you if you need me.


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KESHIAG 7/20/2011 9:38AM

    Wow regardless, you have come very far!! Congrats

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