Friday, October 07, 2011
tears of JOY!!!!! I finally made it!
I always weigh myself at the same time of day (just after getting up, after using the restroom), and in the same state of dress. And today, my scale showed me 160.0 lbs!!!!! That was my goal....the bottom of the weight range my doctor told me was good for me. When I started this journey, I was in the "obese" catagory at 214 lbs, and now I am near the top of my "healthy" weight range (165 is the top, and the doctor told me he wanted me between 160-165). I have gone from size 16 jeans down to a size 8, and from 1X tops in the plus size section to large/x-large in the misses section. I have changed my weight tracker settings to maintenence mode, but am still going to use my trackers for food/exercise input.
I can't believe I made it! I know 54 lbs isn't a lot, and that there are many people here with much more to lose than that, but for someone with ADHD this was a major struggle. Staying focused was/is very hard for me, as impulsivity/self-control is one of my major ADHD issues.
During this journey, my self-esteem has come up very much. I used to feel like I was good for nothing but a paycheck to my lazy, emotionally abusive, codependent ex-husband, and didn't even have the motivation to put on makeup in the mornings to go to work because I felt like I was destined to be miserable for the rest of my life. I now have more energy and more motivation to take care of myself, because I know how hard it was for me to get where I am now. I am in a much healthier relationship that is progressing well with a man who is wonderful and supportive and can make me feel beautiful just by looking at me. I know I do still have some self-esteem issues to work through, but I now feel like I am worthy of, and deserving of, happiness and love.
As in a previous post I made: Huge thank yous to the SparkPeople staff, my friends on my Sparkteams, and my friends offline, especially Jimmy, who was instrumental in turning my life around! I love you all so very much and can't put into words how much I appreciate your help, dedication, and friendship while I have been going through these changes in my life.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I did very well today with my eating!
The only nutrient I track that was out of my recommended limits today was my sodium (it was way high, though I am not as concerned with it as I used to be because my blood pressure has come down). Usually, I have too high calories, and too low fat, but today though calories were almost topped out and fat was completely topped out, both were in range. I usually don't have much problem with carbs and protein, and again, both were in range. I usually have problems with calcium and fiber being too low (calcium about 40% of the time and fiber about 95% of the time), but again, they were both in range.
I got them all in range today (except for the sodium). YAY ME!!!!!
Friday, September 02, 2011
On Feb 27th, 2011, I weighed 214 lbs. Exactly 6 months later, on August 27th, 2011, I weighed 164 lbs. I am a much happier and much healthier person than I was when I started, though I still have about 4 lbs left to go, and am still working on other issues as well. Even though I have not quite reached my goal yet, I needed to put my story on my Sparkpage blog to remind myself that I don't ever want to go back to where I was then, and to thank some very important people for their presence in my life.
For a long time, I had very low self-esteem and was on a downward spiral. I was in an unhappy marriage and was to the point of feeling like all I was good for was bringing home a paycheck. I didn't even have the motivation to put on makeup in the morning before I went to work, and could care even less about what I was putting into my body. I had even started feeling like I should just give up and be resigned to being miserable for the rest of my life.
One of my coworkers stopped that downward spiral by always being there for me whenever I needed someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on. He helped me to feel that maybe there was still hope for happiness in my life. Even though I don't think he realizes it, he went a long way in helping to turn my life around, and I will never be able to repay him for the wonderful friend he has been.
Over the 6 months of my weight loss journey, I have seen many things in my life change for the better. I have lost a total of 50 lbs so far, though I will admit that some of the momentum for that weight loss has been because the ADHD medication I am on (which I started in April) has an appetite suppressant side effect. I am in a much better, much healthier relationship that is the exact opposite of any of my previous abusive and codependent relationships. My self-esteem is getting much better, though I still have some days where I fall a couple of rungs back down the ladder. My ADHD, which had never been controlled before, is slowly coming under a little better control. Physically, my doctor was ecstatic with my weight loss progress when I went to see him yesterday. My blood pressure has come down into normal ranges, and the doctor cut my blood pressure medicine dosage in half, and told me that if it stays down for the next 3 months on the half-dose, he will take me off of it completely.
I have had many other coworkers comment on my weight loss, telling me how incredible I look and asking me how I did it. I give them the Sparkpeople website. Some have joined, others have looked into it. Unfortunately, a lot of them seem to think it is too much work to keep up on the food tracker and message boards, and give up before they can even get started. All I can say is....you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink!
Anyway, I wanted to thank a lot of people for this last 6 months in helping me to turn my life around:
First, I want to thank everyone on the Sparkpeople staff for this website and for all you have done to make it a success, for all the effort and love and hard work you put into it, all for the sake of wanting to see people become healthier and happier.
Next, to my friends on my Sparkteams, I thank you for your support and encouragement, your tips and your ideas. Sometimes I'm not sure what I would do without that connection to others who are sharing similar goals and facing the same problems and dilemmas I face every day on this journey.
And most of all, even though I know he will never read this, I want to say "Thank you, Jimmy!!" You have become one of my best friends and one of the most important people in my life. In many ways, you saved me, if not physically, then you saved my spirit from being completely crushed. For the last 7 months, you have been there to encourage me in many areas of my life, from my weight loss to my divorce to my self-esteem, and for that I owe you so much more than you will ever know. I would never have even gotten started on this journey to a healthier, happier me without your intervention into my downward spiral. And here I am almost to my goal! I love you and will always be there for you, if you should ever need me. I don't know what would have happened to me without you!
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