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The battle for sleep....

Thursday, September 09, 2010

I have been tracking my sleep pattern for over a week now and it looks pretty abnormal. Two nights this week I was able to stay asleep for 5-6 hours in a stretch. Otherwise I wake up about every 1-2 hours throughout the night and when it comes time to get up I am still tired. This morning my alarm was set for 4:30 so I could swim before work and I decided to go back to sleep for 2 more hours but couldn't get to sleep and gave up after 30 minutes. I am awake and sparking now but even though I had 1 cup of coffee, I have a headache that feels similar to a caffeine withdrawal headache. I think the pollen count is high today and I still have my window in bedroom open but will definitely shut it before I go to work today and hope that helps my sleep, too. In about 2 weeks I will be seeing the lung specialist regarding my sleep problem.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITMARY 9/9/2010 7:49AM

    I'm sorry to hear that you are having these sleep problems. I have them myself and they are NO FUN! I wish I had some great advice for you.... I'm sure you know all the obvious things: no caffeine after noon, regular bed time, no eating or working in bed, no alcohol, etc., etc.. Those do help, although nothing works all the time. Maybe misery loves company? I just try not to get too worked up over it and make sure I take it extra slow the next day. Good luck!

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Things are settling down....

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

I talked to my husband's son today and he said he is going to carry the gun (this I gotta see) and not give him the gun until he sees a deer and load the gun for him, etc. etc. He thinks if he stays within arms reach of him and controls the situation nothing bad will happen.

I felt a little better but realize my hubby will not put up with being treated like a child.

I told husband about the plan of his son staying with him and not leaving him alone in the woods and he wants to sit in the deer stand alone. When I told him about his son's plan on "holding his hand" so to speak while he is hunting he said, "Not cool." That was pretty much the end of the conversation so I know his son will have a hard time convincing him to follow the new rules for hunting.

I am glad I will not be anywhere around when the **** hits the fan. Cause I know my husband will feel insulted to be treated that way, even though "it is for his own good." I imagine the hunting trip will be cut short and he will be coming home sooner than expected.

I just hope his son can stand up to his dad and insist on his rules but I am pretty sure it won't work out and his dad will end up being mad (what's new?).....

I have decided not to worry about the situation as his son thinks he can get him to agree...only time will tell. emoticon

P.S. His other son brought my husband to buy his license today.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DJS-DEBBIE 9/8/2010 10:23PM

    I had a feeling that one of them would take him for the license...

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VXWALL1942 9/8/2010 9:57PM

    And the saga continues. All you can do is hope that cooler heads prevail on this hunting trip.

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I told husband I will not take him to buy his hunting license..now, of course, he is mad at me...

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

I told him I don't approve of him hunting and also told him his neurologist agreed that it is not a good idea and is dangerous . He now is mad at me, calling me cruel, etc. etc. After work today I plan to see his son who lives near us and bring him the letter the doctor wrote saying he should not hunt. I will also mail a copy to the son whose land he is planning to hunt on.

I know his reflexes are not good and his judgment is bad. He moves without thinking of consequences and is a "bull in a china shop" at home, spilling and breaking things.

At this point I am only the bad guy in my husband's eyes but, of course, he thinks he is still "pretty good" and able to do this.

He pouted all last night and kept coming out of his room and telling me how mean I am and then started the "poor me" routine and said things like I might as well be dead.... (this was predictable).

I haven't run into him this morning and hope he stays asleep until I leave for work so I don't have to deal with his anger. I told my friend that I was a bit afraid of him if he gets angry enough. He has never been violent with me but his personality is not the same as it used to be. I am ready to leave the house at a moment's notice.....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COBRACOMMANDER 9/8/2010 11:15PM

    Devil's advocate, it's not clear from your post if this is the first time you've spoken to him about the hunting and how you feel about it. If it's coming out of nowhere, I can certainly understand his frustration. Have you talked to him about it?

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FIRESTARINFINI 9/8/2010 9:58PM

    Make sure you stay safe!

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RIPPEDPAUL1 9/8/2010 9:55PM

    Sometimes it's not easy being the truth speaker. emoticon

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CHESAKAT41 9/8/2010 9:52PM

    Best wishes with this situation. I think the Sons are trying to be causcious, but it is too bad they can't realize this is a dangerous situation. I think they are trying to please their Father at this time and give him some last memories, because later there may be no time for this type of togetherness of which they all must love...

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DJS-DEBBIE 9/8/2010 9:16PM

    I am sorry you have to be the 'bad guy'. Too bad his sons don't have more sense.

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BEATLETOT 9/8/2010 8:16PM

    Am I the only one picking up on the irony of the would-be hunter calling you "cruel"? I'm not anti-hunting, not by any means, but you have to admit, it's ironic.

I hope that he feels better about it soon. He knows you love him.

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C0NV3RSEL0V3 9/8/2010 11:15AM

    Sometimes being a wife also means having to be a mom to your spouse. It's never fun when you have to switch hats and be the "bad guy" but men like to see themselves as invincible. The thought of giving up their hobbies translates to giving up their youth. Maybe you can take this time to find things you two can do together now that it's been made known that hunting is not an option. Stay safe and stay strong in your decision!

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GRAMAJMG 9/8/2010 11:03AM

    Please keep yourself safe! You know you did the right thing. emoticon

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GAILRUU 9/8/2010 8:57AM

    It can be difficult to do the right thing. Stay safe.

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MARITAK 9/8/2010 8:31AM

  emoticon

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BRENDA_1975 9/8/2010 8:27AM

    emoticon He may be mad now but hopefully he will realize its because you care about him.

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LOOZINITNOW 9/8/2010 8:03AM

    You are doing this out of love for him. emoticon

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VXWALL1942 9/8/2010 7:54AM

    My heart goes out to you. I know it is difficult to have to be 'the parent' but you are doing the right thing. hugs

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Now what? Hubby with Alzheimer's is going hunting for deer?

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

I can't believe his sons are going to take him hunting. I called the DNR (dept of natural resources) and even though hubby has Alzheimer's and a letter from doctor saying he should not be allowed to hunt they said I cannot prevent him from going. I guess I will just have to appeal to his sons' common sense. (They know he has Alzheimer's.) I just want to avoid anyone getting hurt if possible. I haven't figured what else to do except refuse to take him to buy a license and tell his son if he wants to go hunting with him he will have to take him to buy the license and show him the letter I have from the doctor.

This all does not make any sense to me. It worries me and when I refuse to take him to buy the license I am sure he will be mad at me (but what's new?). emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VXWALL1942 9/8/2010 1:16AM

    praying...

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FLAME42 9/7/2010 10:58PM

    Please don't let him handle a gun. The results could be disasterous, then everyone would be sorry. Please show your sons the letter and try to impress upon them the danger involved. I know they probably just want to take Dad hunting one last time, but that time has past.

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ROSES4UN4ME 9/7/2010 8:27PM

    wow thats a tuff one but that could prove to be dangerous maybe he could be the chaser and not have a gun oh god please you never know which way it will turn...your sons need to open their eyes and see what kind of disaster this could be....and not to be rude but it could be one of them and your husband would die if that happened....stop this before its to late but hoping they wont give him a license would even be better... just put it into the lords hands

god bless
Saundra

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CHESAKAT41 9/7/2010 12:22PM

    It seems to me you being the Wife - you have legal control over the situation, not the Sons. This is tough I am sure. Wishing you the best...

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HISOWN1 9/7/2010 12:00PM

    My Mom has dementia and it took YEARS for my sister's to accept it BUT now they see it

Will pray that some COMMON sense rules here and I would not buy the license either!



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VBPARROTHEAD 9/7/2010 11:55AM

  Are your son's in denial. Yes, the "know" that your husband has Alzheimer's but do not understand or accept the reality of the disease? I have a friend whose mother has Alz. and both of them acknowledge that she has it but can't accept the facts of the disease. They don't understand why she forgets to pull up her slacks when she goes to the bathroom, etc because the Dr. told them a year or more ago that she was in the "early stages" They forget that it is progressive. do you have an Alzheimer's Association that you can call for support and suggestions about how to handle this? Good Luck with all of this. Alzheimer's is a terrible disease and most people don't really understand it and how it can affect their family members..

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GRAMAJMG 9/7/2010 11:31AM

    It looks like Monika is good source for support. You might want to show your sons her response to your blog. God bless you for your loving care and concern for your husband. emoticon

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CORKYTHEMOM 9/7/2010 10:53AM

    I am a member of the Living Healthy In Our 50s and Beyond team. I saw your blog on the ANNOUNCEMENT wall. I was a caregiver to my late husband for 5 years due to complications of his dementia. You are among friends. I wanted to let you know that you're never alone in this journey of care-giving and its responsibilities. Visit my SparkPage anytime .... I offer lots of moral support and comforting hugs. I am so PROUD of you for not giving up on yourself and trying to protect your husband because of his actions that arise from his dementia! Be insistant with his sons. Are they in denial of their father's disease? Are you receiving support from other members of the family and/or from outside resources? Is your husband's doctor and/or the ALZHEIMER'S ASSOCIATION willing to call his sons and intervene the dangers not only to others but to their father? Please, let me know if there's anything I can do to help your through this. I'm right by your side, holding your hand in friendship. Sending hugs from Missouri.

~ Monika ~ emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DIANNEMT 9/7/2010 10:32AM

    Appeal to your sons' common sense. Also--see if they just want him to help beat the deer out to the hunters--no gun for him. If 2 or 3 are being beaters, your husband could participate in that--maybe. Good luck.

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HINOTO 9/7/2010 10:19AM

    Oh geeze, I hope your sons come to their senses and realize that's not a good idea.

I think refusing to take him to buy the license is going to be a good plan of action. If your sons haven't seen the letter yet, you might want to show it to them! Yikes!

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I could get used to 3-day weekends....

Monday, September 06, 2010

My cube neighbor just had his hours cut back (by his request) at work so he works Tuesday through Friday. He is so happy. I would be, too, but I think the reduction in income would be difficult to deal with until I am on Social Security (he is). The way things look right now I probably will still be working when I am on Social Security. I have 2 years to go to get full benefits and it seems so far away, but then I look back even 5 years ago and that doesn't seem so long ago.

Well, working reduced hours is something to look forward to....

For now, I manage to get to work every day and am meeting my quotas. emoticon


P.S. I slept almost 10 hours last night!!! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CATLADY52 9/6/2010 6:50PM

    Great for the 10 hours. Getting the sleep you need is good.

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VXWALL1942 9/6/2010 6:47PM

    Sounds like a plan! Maybe when ss kicks in you'll be able to lay back a bit. Glad you got such a good sleep!

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DJS-DEBBIE 9/6/2010 11:32AM

    Great sleep!

I could get used to 3 day weekends myself but I think it is quite a while off.
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TIME2BLOOM4ME 9/6/2010 10:05AM

    That is wonderful. I had to go on disability and am having to use it early.

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CHESAKAT41 9/6/2010 9:55AM

    Thank you for the comment and suggestion about the Mayo. I certainly will consider that. I was worried about surviving once I went on Social Security at 62. I live in NY and it is extremely high to live here. I am living in an all Senior Gov't Subsidised Apt. Complex and I love it. If it wasn't for that, I could never live here in NY by my daughter. Rent is based on income and you must be 62 to apply...

Rhoda LI, NY

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