Thursday, September 22, 2011
...but aspires to run. Someday. Down the road. Sooner than I think but not today.
ANYWHOOOO! I have been walking every morning for about 3 miles and LOVING IT! But I know that even in San Diego, we get rain. And sometimes, believe it or not, it comes down pretty hard. And since I have about a millisecond to get from the Park, changed deodorized and into my desk chair at work, I do not need to come to work smelling like a wet dog. SO on rainy days, I thought that I'd ask my wise and wonderful friends if you know of a good, maybe 20-30 minute video that I can do at home on rainy days. Now none of these videos where I'll feel like my "last day of living has occurred and I'll never walk again after doing this" video sorta stuff! :-) Something that can challenge someone who's just under (yes UNDER - by a couple of pounds but whatever) 200 lbs.
Thanks bunches for your ideas and encouragement!
Loves and hugs and blessings to you all!
~ Molly :-)
Monday, August 29, 2011
I wanted a candy bar. I most certainly did not NEED a candy bar. I knew I should have waited it out for the feeling to pass but well..
So I go to the vending machine - which, to my credit I have not visited in well over a year, if not even longer. And I put my dollar bill in. And it said "coins only". So you'd think now, wouldn't you that my mind would immediately say "now Molly, obviously you're not supposed to have that candy bar. In fact, dear Molly, this is a sign from God that you are not meant to have a candy bar because you'll eat it and regret it."
But no, my peanut-sized brain said - must find way to get candy bar at all costs!
So clever me (NOT) put her dollar bill into the drink machine thinking hahaha I'll TRICK the machine and just get my money returned in coins. Umm..nope. I pushed the coin return and got nothin'. ARG! So there I am, talking like a pirate to the drink machine. So me, being all virtuous, of course, selected the water. Sold out. The other water selection? Sold out. By now, my dear unsuspecting friend Erika comes over and asks what's up. I explain the situation, which AGAIN should have alerted me to the fact that I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO HAVE THE CANDY BAR MOLLY and says, well push something else. I do and get that gross pink lemonade that I would NEVER drink. Sigh... So I don't have a candy bar and I have this icky liquid fake looking pink stuff. So Erika buys it off of me (she's a skinny mini!) and gives me coins. For the chocolate bar. Which I shouldn't have bought. But did. And ate. And now regret.
So the moral of the story Molly: keep coins at your desk at all times? NO don't get the chocolate bar! :-)
(((HUGS)))) my Sparkly Sparkers!
Sunday, August 28, 2011
I saw on Rip Esselstyn's FB page a link to a blog of a woman that's struggling with over eating. He posted the sweetest reply but I LOVE LOVE LOVE this quote he gave her as well:
ďOur deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people wonít feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. Itís not just in some of us; itís in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.Ē
Nelson Mandela in his inaugural speech
Thank you Rip for taking the time to put this there and thank you God for having me (happen - yeah right!) to stumble upon this! I needed to hear these words and I thank You! :-)
((((HUGS))))) and love my wonderful friends!
Friday, August 26, 2011
I've realized that in certain areas of my life, particularly places where I struggle terribly, that if I don't do it perfectly, then I won't do it at all. Now one might assume I'm a perfectionist and that's what I thought too until I came up with a revelation (this morning while walking, ironically!) I'm using the "perfect" thing as an excuse to quit! That's not a perfectionist, that's a quitter!
If I don't eat perfectly the whole day well, then what's the point? It's not good enough. If I don't go four miles for a walk but only two, well, what's the point of doing it at all! GADS! I need to get rid of this stinky, self-destructive thinking! The point? The POINT is that at the end of the day, I did a lot of good! I walked! Maybe not as far as I could, maybe I turned around before I should have but I did it! Okay so maybe I had too much of that dessert but I had my super healthy oatmeal at breakfast and lots of veggies and that's good enough!
~ Progress, not perfection! ~
If I was a woman who wasn't deathly afraid of needles, I might have that tattooed somewhere so I could see it everyday (well, I guess that would dictate where I WOULDN'T tattoo it! :-P)
So here's to the progress we make every day! Humongous or itty bitty microscopic - it's ALL good enough! Yay my Sparkly friends! I love you so much and I hope you have a wonderful and VERY good enough weekend!
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Wow, that title seems a bit... mmmm.. radical! But that is what I've done and what I desperately need - a radical change!
Hi my friends! I have missed you all so very much! I'm so sorry I dropped out of this amazing world we have here! I have been BLESSED beyond measure with the kindest notes and Sparkgoodies from my AMAZING Sparkfriends! Thank you so much for not giving up on me because honestly, I had given up on myself!
Things got worse since my last check-in. I've finally settled into the fact that it probably won't get better for us for some time to come. BUT (smacking myself on my head!) that is life so get over it and don't let it conquer you, Molly! Yes, money will be beyond tight for quite a while but I'm so blessed in a bazillion ways! Whining over this is like getting every present imaginable on Christmas morning and still looking for that plastic toy that I didn't get. Not very grateful at all. I don't want to become bitter and ungrateful. I want to be happy in my space and joyous over my blessings. :-)
So the radical changes:
1) I cannot let my circumstances dictate what I eat or what I don't do (read: exercise and take care of myself!) I cannot let my guard down for a moment. It is my nature to always choose the path of non-effort. Honestly, that lazy sloth I see at our local Zoo - we have the exact same genes, I'm sure!
2) This is the big change - I'm getting up early (and I adore my sleep!) and going to our local park and walking for an hour before work. This decision to alter my schedule is such a radical change and I couldn't be more excited. Talk about thinking outside of the box! I always say I'll walk after work but that does not happen. It's too hot, I need to run an errand, I don't wanna :-0 any old excuse will do. Again, the sloth - aka: me -will always choose to not act rather than exert any effort.
I knew that I had to get everything together ahead of time so I could be super successful and not give myself a "well I forgot that so I can't exercise" excuse. Honestly, if a single sprinkle falls, I'm telling myself that a monsoon is coming so I can't exercise. Really Molly? Is your foundation so shaky that you can't even withstand one inconvenience?? So I packed up all my supplies to walk and then go to work and get changed and cleaned up and pretty-fied (read: don't smell like I've been walking for an hour!) and then up to the office by 7:30. It worked perfectly this morning and I know it will continue to be the most ideal situation for me.
One thought I had when I was looking for excuses (I tell you it's a gift - I should list on my resume!) I thought - ooh it's dark and maybe no one will be there except for random strange people. Umm...no, there were people running, walking their dog, it wasn't dark AND the best part - there were two groups of Marines and Navy probies running through the park and doing their cadence! And actually that made me cry. Twice! If they are there, willing to put their lives on the line for me and this amazing country, well dang Molly stop your sniveling pity party and get your attitude firmly adjusted!
And you know what? Walking in the morning makes me want to walk more during the day! And it makes me want to choose my food more wisely! And it makes me want to consider running. Really? Me running? So excited! So it's a win-win-win-win-win-etc. situation!
Thank you for letting me blab on over this. You guys are the best therapists, listeners, encouragers and friends a girl could ask for! Now I'm back and off to find out all the wonderfulness YOU'VE been up to! Thank you and I love you!
~ Molly :-)
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