Friday, October 03, 2014
Having been not on the healthy lifestyle journey for a year now I am wanting to get back on track again as I have been feeling unhealthy, sick, unmotivated and lethargic.
I want to continue my journey with establishing new habits. But only small ones. I need to build success and confidence to provide momentum for continuing the journey. Small amounts of sucess are like fuel for the car on my journey of change.
Working on the principle of establishing habits through the loop of 'cue, reward, routine'.
I will be spending a lot of time trying to remove expectations of what i think i should be doing and focus on DOING anything. I won't even be setting goals of 'x' number of minutes of exercise per day, 'x' numbers of calories... this is all going to start with a fortnight of journalling. i just need to reaquaint myself with myself, my reasons, roadbloack, foundations and self knowledge.
There are long term goals but i will stay hush hush about them for now so they don't put pressure on me and make me feel like i will fail. While I am journaling i will work on establishing first the habit of journaling which isn't a long term commitment unless i feel it will have ongoing rewards for me by setting up a cue for the journaling.
I am moving house soon and will be living by myself. i'm looking forward to being able to put whatever i like around the house, being in control of the pantry and fridge and not feeling embarrassed if i have silly things like star charts on the fridge to track my progress in creating habits. i might even end up with a spare room to exercise in!
when i do get towards exercise my focus will be on rebuilding the foundations of my health and mobility. undoing all the damage that is being done by a sedentary lifestyle and desk job. it won't be focused on intensity or duration or distance.
the journaling is also a way of discovering and documenting positive reasons to continue this challenge. at the moment i am being pushed by negative energy about myself and the way i feel. to make this sustainable i need to find something better than that. i just don't know what a positive could be. i know i'm meant to want it for me, so i feel better and have more energy but that doesn't inspire me. do i like clothes enough to want to fit into my favourites again? no. am i competitive enough to want to be the best or be challenged in a race? no. do i want to be healthier so my family will be proud of me and not look at me funny when i wear 'fat clothes'? maybe. but that sounds like a negative motivator too.
as you can see some of the above questions are reasons why i think journalling will be helpful. after all... doesn't the word journalling come from journey?