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Off the pity potty and scoring some points

Saturday, March 29, 2008

I should have been taking my son back to school today after Spring Break. But I am unable to, so his "friend with benefits" came and picked him up. Real nice girl. She came into town earlier in the week and spent the night.

When I dropped him off at the beginning of the school year, it was hard. My baby was growing up. When he left to go back after his other breaks, it was hard. I had seen during his visits how much he was growing up. But this time he left, not by himself, not with me bringing him back, but he left with a woman. My baby is all grown up. Very, very hard.

I should be leaving for the airport in a couple of hours to catch a plane for our Vegas Girls Weekend away. But I'm not. I fooled myself until almost the last minute that I could handle a 4 hour plane ride with this pain from my back. As a result, no one is going and that's got me a bit down. But we'll re-schedule for another time, hopefully soon. At least I have that to look forward to.

I'm in quite a bit of pain, but I get by with a little help from my meds. Hopefully, I'll get that totally under control by the end of next week and can get on with my life. Get my house unpacked finally, look for a job, plan a vacation, and NOT all in that order.

Unable to work out at all other than walking for the past few weeks, minimal training for a few weeks before that, my progress as to getting into shape has reversed. I'm managing to maintain my weight, but what little muscle tone I had started gaining is now lost completely. So the pouch belly is back. Way back. I look pregnant. It's a problem that I will always have, due to some health issues, but at least with constant crunches, it was merely a bump that all middle aged women battle. Now I'll have to wage that war all over again.

I've really been sucking in the weekly challenges. On the upside, my water intake is up due to necessity because of meds, but that's also a part of the belly problem. The meds are making me hold onto it too. But no exercise and no working out, no points or bonus points there. No workout, no points for listening to 80's music while I work out. I'm not great lately, so no posting in the greatness thread, no points.

No points, no points, no points. Gotta get off the pity potty and get some points.

So yeah, this is me rocking to the 80's in honor of my 80's Music Lovers Team. 100 points for me!

I can't remember which prom this was, I had one Junior prom and was a senior twice, so got two of those. It was either 1980, 1981 or 1982. I was with the same guy all three years, so I can't tell by my date. Come on, give me a break, it was almost 30 years ago!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOWNAGAIN 4/1/2008 10:33AM

    Tracy, you look so purdy in this pic. Those swan planters were definitely the best accent to set off the colour of your peachy dress. You definitely had it goin' on Girl...and you still do! Minus the swans, minus the peach dress and minus a date with a bow tie bigger than his head, you look just as fabulous almost 30 years later.

As for your aches and pains, I truly hope that disipates very soon. Please get your rest and take good care of yourself. The exercise can fall back into a routine when you are feeling better. I bet it felt good though to get this self pity moment out there though. It always works for me! Hugs, Joy

Comment edited on: 4/1/2008 10:33:02 AM

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HEALTHIERLYNN 3/30/2008 12:07AM

    Ok, June is SO right and Becky posted the most beautiful comment I've ever read!! So, that leaves me very little to say! Me? I know...hard to believe! But yeah, I ARE great, Tracy and your pity party is over, Baby....As of 12:00 midnight tonight, which is in 56 minutes for you, it's back to reminding yourself how wonderful you are! Vegas will's been there for a long time and I don't see it disappearing any time soon...get healthy and we're alllllllll over it! Woot Woot!

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GRUMPYGRAMS 3/29/2008 9:57PM

    HI Tracy...Life doesn't have enough time to set on the pitty pot for very long. So I'm glad you're getting off of it. Ummm, don't feel bad about Lynn & I not going. Something else came up, concerning my taxes, & like we said--"something is keeping us away from Vegas at this time"!! I KNOW we're gonna have TONS of fun when we do get to go.

I love your prom pic!!! Sooooo pretty! Love the color. I bet you had a ball. Love ya--you take care of yourself. That's an ORDER!!!!!!!!!

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CIAMOM 3/29/2008 5:33PM

    You know what, Tracy? You are great. You're great even if you never exercise again (but you will). You're great no matter how much you weigh. You're great even when you're not feeling great. And do you know why? You're great because God made you that way. You're the only one like you. You bring encouragement to others when they need it most. You're a great friend, a great mother, a great person. You've helped me through more than one "down" time, and I'm so grateful for you! So yep, off the pity potty, and I expect you to post your greatness ASAP!! ;)

I absolutely love the pic - you were and are GORGEOUS! Lovin' your date's white tux - very Saturday Night Fever (you know, if John Travolta had opted for peach instead of black and a bow tie instead of exposed chest)! :) Way to earn those points, girl!

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The Joy's of SparkPeople

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

The title of this blog may lead you to believe that itís about the website, but itís not, really. Itís about the people who use this website, and the community atmosphere that gets everyone involved. This particular blog is inspired by a member named Joy, (POPBELLA) as well as several other people who have made positive changes in their lives, and by extension, the lives of others.

After being ripped off last week by 2/10 of a pound, Joy hit her 100 lbs. lost mark this past week. I was so happy for her, and so proud of this woman that I have never met. I only ďknowĒ her through her quiet interactions in the 80ís Music Loverís Team. Iím sure that with all the people on SparkPeople, there are many others that have hit and surpassed the 100 lb. mark. Joy did this in only 6 months.

Another inspiring person is Paul (KRNRJOCK67). Paul is just about 20# shy of 100 lbs. lost. Heís been at it for 5 months. Paul is a very active member of the 80ís Music Lovers Team, as well as several other teams. He was also chosen as a SparkPeople motivator, a well deserved honor. His daily challenges on one of the message threads helped to keep people focused, one day at a time.

There are tangible differences in everyoneís weight loss program, goals, and lifestyle, Not everyone needs or wants to lose 100 lbs, but their goals are no less important. Certainly, not many can do it in 6 months. What is great is the determination Joy and Paul have shown, and the focus, dedication and hard work that theyíve put forth in order to reach their particular milestones and I have no doubt that they will reach their ultimate goals.

I would be remiss if I didnít mention Lynn (HealthierLynn). Team leader of the 80ís Music Lovers, as well some other teams (I only have time for the one), who was also honored by SparkPeople. I really donít think there is a bigger cheerleader out there, for SparkPeople, or for each and every member of her teams. Her energy and enthusiasm are limitless, and I honestly donít know how she finds the time to keep up with all she does on SparkPeople, plus her own active ďrealĒ life. She is always there with an encouraging word or a laugh, or even a kick in the pants for anyone who may need it. She lives and breathes SP, I think.

Iíve only mentioned a few here, but there are many more. Each and every person within the SparkPeople Community is responsible for motivating and inspiring someone else, whether they know it or not. Thatís whatís great about this website and keeps it as successful as it is. The help is here whenever you need it, sometimes even if you didnít realize you needed it.

For myself, I am at goal, and Iíve lost 60 lbs in 6 months to get there, but as I said above, there are tangible differences in everyoneís program. My problem was, and still is an addiction to soda. I stopped drinking the regular kind and switched to diet, and then actually started eating, which I hadnít really been doing before. The eating alone seemed to increase my metabolism and start me on the road to my goal. I didnít even start an exercise program until I had lost 40 lbs. Iím almost ashamed to admit that it came so easy for me, when so many others have to make such life changes and sacrifices to accomplish the same things. In fact, I had trouble stopping the weight loss. But a Healthy lifestyle? I am nowhere near it. I made only minor modifications to what I eat, and the soda habit is still there, only in diet form, which is equally bad, if not worse. I still have a hard time getting in the minimum glasses of water, and fruits and vegetables are not a regular part of my daily meal planning.

This is why these people have, and still do motivate me. The changes theyíve made in their lifestyles, for the better, inspire me to want to do better. Just losing the weight was not my only goal. I wanted to be healthy, and Iím not there yet. Sure, some things are definitely better. My awareness of what Iím putting into my mouth has actually lowered my cholesterol better than the meds I was on had done. I have more energy now, due to actually eating, losing all of that excess weight, and exercise. The calorie intake is up there now to a healthy level, which has kicked my metabolism into gear, but I know itís not just calories, but what they are made up of, and I do not ALWAYS make the best choices. Granted, they are better than they used to be, but I have not made significant changes in what I eat, and have a long way to go in that respect. Thereís no doubt in my mind that if I switched back to regular soda, it would take even less than 6 months go right back to where I was, and probably even heavier.

So Iím still on my SparkPeople Journey. The quest is not over, because my goals have not been met. Iím still tracking my food and exercise, and I still look daily to the Joyís and Paulís and Lynnís of SparkPeople, and everyone else out there for the motivation and inspiration to continue what Iíve started and get healthy, and take my life back.

You guys are phenomenal. All of you, not just the ones I mentioned. You rock!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ITSME_KRIS10 3/27/2008 2:19PM

    Great blog! It is definitely encouraging to see that you lost your weight without being perfect. It helps to know that if I keep at it (Mistakes and all) that I can do it! And you are a great motivator yourself! Thanks for everything!

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JESPAH 3/27/2008 6:25AM

    Lynn sent me. :)

What a wonderful entry!

I definitely see this as a journey. And we're all going together. There's something very warm and comforting about that.

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DOWNAGAIN 3/25/2008 7:06PM

    Oh Tracy, How is it that you always find the right words to say, the right things to comment on to make a person's day? Heck, you've just made my year with this blog! In a million years, I never thought I could ever be at a point where I would actually be an inspiration to anyone in the 'weight loss department'. Just a little over 6 months ago, I was in awe after finding this site and viewing people's success stories. Their success stories gave me the power and determination to do this too.
As you said, with everyone's weight loss and change to a healthier lifestyle journey being individually unique, I can be inspired by someone who only has 5 pounds to lose. You, my friend, are truly the sense that you take the time out of your busy life to help others to commend themselves. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being the wonderful person that you are. I consider myself so fortunate to have crossed your path on this website and I look forward to a continuous bond to last a lifetime. Thanks,'re simply the best!

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DETERMINED_ME 3/25/2008 6:58PM

    I don't think I can say more then Lynn did below...You are awesome!

Comment edited on: 3/25/2008 6:57:01 PM

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HEALTHIERLYNN 3/25/2008 6:28PM

    Tracy, wow! What a great blog!!! And believe me, had my name not been mentioned, I would still be making the same comment! You are so right that Paul and Joy are such motivation for others, as well as all of those out there in the World 'O Spark, many of whom have no idea that they inspire others. Sure, losing the weight is HUGE (no pun intended LOL) and plays a major part in a healthier lifestyle, but it's the dedication towards eating healthier (notice I said "healthier", rather than "healthy") and incorporating some form of exercise into our daily lives that moves us all in the direction towards a Healthier Lifestyle. It's individuals like Paul, Joy, YOU, etc. who personally keep ME going...and who have helped me to Get Back on Track, Baby!! Can't wait to meet the Real Live Tracy in Vegas next week ~ SparkGirls Gone Wild ~ Woot Woot!! :-) Love ya, Girl!

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THINMOM5 3/25/2008 1:49PM

    This was a great entry! The people here are amazing aren't they? And I'm sure you'll get to all your healthier goals too. I don't think you're the only one on here who lost weight but without eating as healthy as they wanted. But it's amazing to me how people continue to make good changes to their diet even after they're at their goal weight, and I'm sure you will too. You're doing awesome!! :)

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Somehow, I managed

Monday, February 25, 2008

I don't know how I did it, but I did. Maybe stress had something to do with it. I used to be the type that loses weight when under stress or pressure, so now that my metabolism is pumped back up, that's working for me again. I don't know.

I have been through several days of diet hell. 3 wakes and 2 funerals in 5 days. Not to be profiling, but all 3 of them were stereotypical Irish wakes, complete with tons of food and booze. The funeral luncheons were more like wedding receptions. Food, food, food and booze.

Unable to control what food was available, all I could do was control my choices and portions and hope for the best. Unable to get to a computer to log what I ate, I had no idea where I was at.

Luckily, when I did get to the computer, 2 or 3 in the morning in some cases, I saw that, while I came within a few (a very few) calories of going over max, I was still within range. Nutrition-wise, the fat content was a bit high most days, with carbs being up there as well, but I was still getting enough protein, or close enough to it to be able to say I didn't go too far in any direction.

Thursday was the easiest, and almost half of my calories came from freggies. After being assaulted when I walked in by waiters with hors d'ouvres, I spotted a table with fresh fruits and veggies, and planted myself in a corner near there until lunch was being served, and by then, I couldn't eat much more anyway. Saturday was the worst, with a brownie in the afternoon setting off a sugar craving that lasted all night long.

Did I indulge myself. Oh yes. I don't think that even Paul, our SP rock, or Lynn, the biggest SP evangelist there is, could be near a table loaded down with brownies and cookies and assorted other sweets and not have a sample or two. OK, three. And I had to look at one on 3 days.

These were all my friend's people, so it wasn't like we could stop in so he could pay his respects and then leave. We had to stay. So, there was a wake on Wednesday, funeral Thursday (his sister), a wake on Saturday, funeral Sunday (his cousin) and another wake on Sunday (his friend since high school). On Friday, the only day we weren't attending a wake or a funeral, my friend surprised me with a pizza from my favorite pizza place.

Yes, diet hell, but I managed it. The ticker shows it.

Now, after losing 5 days of packing time, I've only got 2 days left before the movers come, and my place is only halfway packed. That's where the stress comes in. But I'll manage that too. My fear is running out of boxes. I'm out of tape again and have to go out, so I've just been waiting for the store to open.

At least I won't have to worry about going over on calories for the next couple of days. I won't have time to eat. LOL.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BONDGIRL72 2/25/2008 2:05PM

  Tracy, I feel your pain! But good job! I don't know that I could've done quite as well as you did, right now. I wish you lots of normalcy real soon! Maybe your vacation will help with that.
Keep going, you're an inspiration.

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HEALTHIERLYNN 2/25/2008 11:35AM

    You're right, Tracy...I'd have had at least one brownie and probably more than that! My sweet tooth is in rare form these days and it's not pretty! Sorry to hear about the wakes and funerals, and please give my best to your friend, as well. Don't stress too much over the packing ~ somehow it always ends up getting done!

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Boredom Blog

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Does anyone know who I would petition at SP to add something to the cardio list?

I think that disconnecting and untangling the spaghetti that makes up a hard-wired home computer network with 4 computers and multiple peripherals should count for something! If so, I got in 3 hours worth. That includes moving furniture out of the way.

I'm exhausted and quit for the night. I wanted to get more done tonight. I didn't do much yesterday at all. My son was in town for the day. We had an appointment in the morning, and then had to go get new driver's licenses and such. He also made me take back the treadmill I bought. Saturday when he was here I asked him to help me take it up when I took him to the new place. His response was the only place he would help me carry it was back to where I bought it from. He said that I have a gym membership so there is no reason why I need a treadmill. I said it was for when I couldn't get to the gym and then he brought up the fact that I am not supposed to do any cardio training when I am alone, and since I live alone, why do I need a treadmill? I couldn't come up with a good enough argument, so he won and we took it back. I hate logic. Smarta$$ Brat. Then he helped me pack for a couple of hours, but then I needed to go out and he needed to head back to school. (No, not NIU)

I was going to pop over to my friend's house to drop off a Valentine's Day card and some flowers, but I did not plan on staying. I planned on just sneaking in, leaving him the surprise and then sneaking out again. I was going to drop in to the office and finish the 1099's (I'm still unemployed, but told him I'd help him out and finish that kind of stuff up for him when I was in the area), and then go to the laundromat to wash the comforters and kill time while waiting for rush hour traffic to die down before going home, and back to work.

But it didn't work out that way. My friend got home early, and called me just as I was leaving the house, to wish me a Happy Valentine's Day, and asked if I was in the area. I told him that I was just leaving the house, headed for the city and he asked me if I would stop by for a minute, claiming a computer problem, and since it had been my intention to go there anyway, I said sure. I had wanted him to come home from work and see the flowers as a surprise, but I figured it would surprise him just as much if he was home.

I stopped at the florist on the way and picked up the flowers I ordered. A dozen red-tipped yellow roses. When I get there, the door was locked. I have a key, but usually he leaves it unlocked if he is expecting me, because I normally have my hands full. My overnight bag, groceries, whatever. I think he left the door locked this time because it would serve as a warning that I was there.

So, as I was fumbling for my key, he opens the door and is standing there with...

A beautiful bouquet of red-tipped yellow tulips.

He loves roses, and tulips are my favorite flower, so that's not so odd. The interesting thing is our choice of yellow with red-tips. Great minds think alike? I wonder.

We had some dinner, and I did help him with some computer stuff. It wasn't a problem per se, it was software instruction. I had bought him a copy of Quicken to help him manage his finances and was helping him with his current entries and reconciling some things. After that, we watched a movie and went to sleep.

So I got to spend Valentine's Day with my two favorite men. How lucky can a girl get?

Anyway, I'm quitting with the packing for the night, and won't get anything done tomorrow because I'm going back in to the city. My friend wants to go and check out Costco to see if he wants a membership, and so do I.

I have a week and a half left before moving day, and there is a lot left to do. But hey, shopping will ALWAYS take precedence over packing and cleaning and patching and painting.

I have my priorities, you know. And I work best under pressure anyway.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEALTHIERLYNN 2/16/2008 2:08AM

    Ha! The Smart A$$ Brat sounds like a chip off the old block! LOL At first I'm reading it and I'm like, what? He wouldn't help her move it? What a jerk! Then as I read further and saw his logic I couldn't help but laugh! Too funny! I love the fact that your friend and you bought eachother flowers at the same time, and the same color...great minds definitely do think alike!

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OWI Wowie

Monday, February 11, 2008

I love the SP reports. I am a charts and graphs and put it all on paper kind of person. Looking at myself in the mirror doesn't really do it for me. I didn't see myself getting fat, so it stands to reason that I don't see myself getting thinner.

Sure, my clothes are a smaller size, and I need a smaller size again. Sure, I see the numbers on the scale dropping. Not quite as fast as they used to, but it's OK. I can see the finish line.

But how does 194 relate to 145? How does a size 20 relate to a size 12 or 10?

I only wish I had started tracking my measurements from the very beginning instead of waiting for a month. I never expected to get so involved in this site, so I didn't explore and see everything SP had to offer.

But these reports put it all there for me to see. The progress, the one or two setbacks, the way things are shifting around from one place to another.

Comparing a before picture and a current picture is great. But that's me in both pictures. I like the way I look now, but back then, I liked the way I looked too. Or accepted it. It was me.

No, I need to remove myself from the equation. I need to see the numbers. Pictures are emotional and biased. Numbers are cold analytical facts.

I like my numbers now. And they are making me emotional.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRUMPYGRAMS 2/11/2008 11:51PM

    Tracy, I love the way you put this. You are so right about the numbers really showing the facts! I'm like you-it's hard for me to see that I've lost very much, but when I see the measurements--that's what floors me! You've done a tremendous job in a short amount of time--you rock girl!

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HEALTHIERLYNN 2/11/2008 11:25AM

    Awwww, that's awesome, Tracy!!

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