Thursday, July 07, 2011
Yesterday I finally broke down and went to the consignment shop to pick up some clothes. It was right next to the grocery store and a spur of the moment thing since it's gotten *that* frustrating to dress in my closet full of size 10/12/14 bottoms and L/XL tops. I ended up with size 4 jean shorts. Size 4! I'll take the 5 sizes down part of the equation. I assume the 14 is as skewed as the 4 so the difference is real. But size 4? That doesn't really compute. It's not the size 4 I remember from my 'skinny' days. I outgrew size 4 at around 125 pounds. I'm 142 pounds. I can't *really* fit into the same size at 17 pounds more just because I'm not 'skinny fat' this time, can I? Or is this just vanity sizing? (Or both?)
This is concerning. Having not shopped the small end of the rack since 1996, how in the world to truly thin people shop? I'm still overweight according to the BMI charts! I still have 12 pounds to go until I hit my goal (18% body fat). I need to get into a 'real' store this weekend. There are no 'real' stores in my town. The next town over has a pile of very high end stores that are out of my price range. I'll have to hit Kohl's over the weekend. I sure hope there are size 2s in standard stores these days. When I was a size 3/4, 3/4 was the smallest on the rack. Surely it isn't anymore!
What a problem to have! Makes me grin like a fool. I never ever ever ever expected to be successful in getting back to pre-pregnancy size this time. (And I did save 1 pair of pants from way back when so I know that I AM back to what used to be a size 5/6.) I started this journey 10 1/2 months ago with a goal of getting back into my 10s and 12s and getting strong enough to avoid future injuries. I had learned to love the body I had, except it was a tad too large and much too weak. It's almost like that's all it took to be able to change it.... not berating myself for the body I had. The mind is so very strange. Or maybe just MY mind!
Wednesday, July 06, 2011
Recently my weight loss as slowed from 2 pounds a week (more than my plan) to 1/2 pound a week (less than my plan). I'm not 'bothered' by the number so much as pondering the why.
The change occurred as life changed. The kids are out of school for the summer. We had a family wedding, a mini vacation, 4th festivities, and company for a week. All of these involve food tied up with emotion, as opposed to just eating, and I know I need to handle eating in an emotional context. So, when I eat more... am I 'sabotoging' myself? Is it 'just' emotional eating? Is there fear of reaching goal and therefore incentive to not, which is emotional eating too, right? Or, when I eat more because we are celebrating with foods I wouldn't eat daily .... am I just being balanced? I know I am splurging. I know I am splurging quite often. It just happens to be that a bunch of celebrations are piled upon each other right now. I have not felt deprived nor have I felt guilty. I think this is good, even if the weight loss has slowed. I've also changed up the exercise a bit. Cut the cardio by an hour a week (from 4 hours to 3 hours) and begun a core boot camp. My BF% is down a bit and my final goal (18% BF) has actually bumped up by a 1/2 pound or so. So the slow loss may be due to those changes (welcome changes) too.
The next 2 weeks will be rather quiet. I guess I'll see then! Balance and body composition changes I welcome! The fear can hit the road!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
My June Goals were:
I might as well toss a few goals up here. What I'm doing is working very well so there isn't much for me to change.
1. Lose 4 more pounds (to 146).
DONE! I've been bouncing around in a 2 pound range but the top of it is 144-ish. Score!
2. Monitor %BF every day at bedtime to get a baseline to compare to in subsequent cycles.
NOT DONE! Just too hard to remember to strip, weigh, and measure at bedtime when I do my weigh ins first thing. I'm switching to first thing, even if it's not the best time of the day to do it. It IS best for me.
3. Remember to eat breakfast on rest days BEFORE I start to feel dizzy.
DONE! I only skipped breakfast once all month, on a day we were traveling all day. I didn't feel dizzy at all that day, although I really do hate to skip breakfast now.
4. Use or give away EVERYTHING in the farm basket so nothing goes to waste.
DONE! We're only on our third basket but this is going very well!
1. Lose 4 more pounds. From the top of my bouncing around range this week, that will put me at 140 which is my first big goal.
2. Monitor %BF in the AM at least every other day. (I no longer think I need to have data every day.)
3. Continue to work out 5 times a week, even when traveling. I may not hit the gym but I want to do something that makes me sweat!
4. Continue to not waste items from the CSA.
Lowering my % body fat was not part of my June goals but I *have* reduced it by about 2% to 25.5%. Very happy to see progress there! I hope that in August I won't be concerned so much with how much I weigh and will be, instead, working on my first body fat goal - 24%. (The top of the 'fit' range.)
Thursday, June 23, 2011
For the last 3 months I've lost a lot the week before AF and the week of. This month, not so much. I'm down 12 pounds in 6 weeks on a plan to lose a pound a week. I've met my goal for the month of June. I'm in a freakin' size 6 months before I expected to be. But it's still frustrating that the scale has been stuck when I expected it to move. That'll teach me to expect this journey to be predictable!
Tomorrow is the last day of school in town. I started this journey 9 days before school started and had lost 8 pounds by the first day of school. I am down another 24 pounds since the first day of school. The first day of school is like New Year's to me - a time to set some goals for the coming year - and I am delighted that, for the first time, I weigh significantly less on the last day of school than I did on the first day. So what that it's a few pounds more than I hoped!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Here I am in week 3 of my cycle, stuck on the mini plateau that has happened week 3 for the last 3 months, and happy as can be. I figure the number will change eventually and my body continues to change now. I feel strong and happy and amazed with my progress over the last 10 months.
I saved just one pair of jeans from before I got pregnant in 1998. Sizes change and I wanted something I knew fit 'before'. I have never come close to fitting in them since. Today I button and zipped them for the first time in 13 years. They are too small but I had them all the way on! That was a good feeling. I could neither zip nor button them just last weekend.
I am starting to see the tinest bits of definition in my abs and hamstrings and, if I flex, glutes. These are my worst parts so, again, happy and amazed.
The old me couldn't imagine focusing on anything but the number on the scale. What a change for me.
Get An Email Alert Each Time TANYAP71 Posts