Monday, June 27, 2011
Today was a GREAT day! I haven't felt this good since I originally joined Spark months ago! I lost my spark after a month of no weight loss, minimal exercise, and just an overall self-destructive funk. I knew that I needed to get back on track and I wanted to start this week (and this leg of EPIC) on the right foot. I settled into bed last night and gave myself a stern talking to. I reminded myself that this journey I'm on will not always be smooth sailing and that I can't just give up everytime things gets hard. I reminded myself of all the reasons I joined Spark in the first place and all the goals that I vow to one day reach! I even included some positive thoughts about exercise, trying to psyche myself out that it really isn't as bad as I make it out to be. I created a schedule for myself to follow on MWF and kept thinking positive, happy, fun thoughts until I fell asleep!
When I woke up this morning, I was in a pretty great mood. I got up and got dressed and gave myself the pep talk I needed to get out the door. It's always the first step, especially in doing something new, that's the hardest for me. We can't really afford a gym membership right now, but luckily we have one here at the apt complex, so I walked over there right after they opened. Once I was there, standing on the treadmill I had to laugh at how silly I've been. What took me so long to get to this point? Why was it such a struggle to take that first step? It felt so good to be there, sweating, jamming out to the tunes on my iPod. After my 45 min flew by, I felt incredible. On top of the world.
Admitedly, I was a little worried if I would follow through with the rest of the workout I had planned. My goal was to do 60 min of cardio today (30 min on the treadmill and 30 min using one of my DVDs) and since I only had 15 min left to meet goal, I was worried I would just say "Oh, that was enough. I don't need to go anything else!" But I ate a snack, took a break, and then got right back up and popped in my DVD. I wasn't sure how that was going to go cause it was my first time using free weights. Again, I had a blast. I was so proud of myself and I couldn't help thinking how proud I was of myself. At this point I've done all of my DVDs enough that I know what's coming next, so this time I turned the volume down and put music on in the background which helped immensely. The cheesy music they use bores me to tears.
Another bit of excitement is that I have not smoked one cigarette today! Don't get me wrong, I've thought about it, but I've tried to distract myself instead of lighting up. I feel really good about quitting this time. I don't want to smoke. I smoke a lot out of boredom, but now that I have my new kitten Jellybean, I think about how that second hand smoke could affect her and I feel so guilty. She's the cutest thing I've ever seen and I don't want to do anything that would hurt my precious baby. Jellybean is probably part of the reason that I got my spark back. She makes me happy....she makes me laugh at her silly antics....and she melts my heart when she wants to sleep with me and follow me everywhere. I nearly killed her when I was doing my boot camp workout. She thought we were playing and tried to attack my foot when I was doing a front kick and I nearly kicked her in the head! I don't think I realized how bored and lonely I was during the day until I got her. Reiko said she heard me talking to the fish and the plant the other day and she knew something had to be done haha
So what did I learn today? Music makes everything better! It really makes a difference how I feel during the workout....how I handle it. The time goes by much faster and it becomes enjoyable for me to work out. I also got more sleep than I have been getting and I think that helped give me the energy that I needed. Since the BP meds make me feel fatigued, I have to almost counter balance them by getting more sleep than I normally would. I'm thrilled I've found my niche, my routine that seems to work for me! And I can tell I'm going to feel it in the morning. I'm already a little sore and I love it! Can't wait for ST and stretching session tomorrow!
Spread the spark! Make it happen! Keep pushing forward! Rah Rah Sis Boom Bah!!!
Love and Light,
Here is another pic of JB! She's so cute I just had to share!
Saturday, June 25, 2011
This leg of EPIC was not what I had hoped it would be. I seemed to really struggle with weight loss this leg and I have a couple of ideas as to what the cause was. 1) I really believe that my BP meds and lower heart rate were a factor. I've been on the meds since this leg of EPIC started and it was really hard to get my heart rate up to it's target range when doing cardio. 2) There was definitely a lack of motivation on my part. I just couldn't seem to push myself to do what I know I needed to do. 3) Vacation definitely knocked me for a loop. I was active, but did not do any cardio or ST like I had planned. 4) My eating habits were all over the place this leg. There were several times I forgot to eat lunch because I wasn't really hungry and I was out and about. Then, by the time dinner would come around, I'd be starving and eat all of lunch and dinners calories in one sitting. Yes, I stayed in calories range, but that is so not good for the body. Varying from my usual has more of a affect on me then I thought it would. 5) This was my first leg as a leader and I think it takes time to find the right balance. I am in NO WAY complaining or blaming being a leader on my lack of weight loss. It's simply just one of many bumps in the road that I will encounter on my journey. I focused more on my team then myself this leg for sure.
So what have I done or what am I going to do to get back on track? 1) One of the things I most excited about is that I got some free weights. The resistance bands are nice, but definitely not the same thing as traditional free weights. I've only gotten to use them once, but I can absolutely tell a difference. I might still use the resistance bands, because they do offer a slightly different workout, a couple times a week. 2) I'm going to have a more positive outlook on my cardio sessions and do activities that I enjoy, instead of forcing myself to do things that I don't like which usually ends up in me not working out at all. 3) I'm really going to focus on not caring what people think of me so that I can get out there and try some new things. I've been TALKING about this running thing for over a month now and I still haven't done it and I'm getting pretty fed up with myself. 3) I purchased a new HR monitor because my old one was undependable. This way I can know for sure if I'm in my target HR range while working out and get a more accurate reading on the calories I'm burning. I had been using Spark and other online calorie calculators to gauge how many calories I was burning and I don't think I was getting correct information. 4) I'm going to create a schedule so that I get the personal time I need to focus on my journey, while still supporting and encouraging my team! I've come to love members of the SA Team and I want to be involved in their journey and help as much as I can.
I had started to get really discouraged this last couple of weeks. My BP meds make me feel fatigued and I don't think I noticed that the fatigue was affecting me mentally. I kept thinking I was being lazy, but it was more that I didn't have the energy to propel myself forward.So that negative thinking lead to negative self-talk and that led to me pretty much shutting down. "I'm so lazy, I'm never going to lose weight. I might as well just eat and do what I want cause it's not going to make a difference, etc..." Luckily, I caught myself (with the help of my Spark family) and reeled myself back in before I completely fell off the wagon. What I should have done, was broken up my cardio into 3, 10 minute sections and I would have been successful. But I'm stubborn and I wanted to be able to do my full 30 min at once, instead of stopping to think that breaking it up would be just as beneficial as doing it all at once.
That's what this journey is all about. Trial and error. The lessons I've been through were lessons that I needed to learn. I feel better and more prepared to carry forward and be successful. I probably won't reach my next goal by it's due date, but I'm ok with that. I feel really blessed that I didn't fall far off the wagon and gain all my weight back that I've already lost.
I did manage to lose the 2 lbs that I gained on vacation! Here is my AFTER pic for this leg of EPIC. This shirt is loser than in the before pic:
Stay Strong, Spread the Spark, and Don't Give Up! No one ever said this journey would be easy. Will you let it break you? No, I didn't think you would!
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't seem to get motivated lately. I lost weight earlier this month, but have managed to gain it back plus 2 lbs!! I seem to want the results without wanting to put forth any effort which I know is ridiculous. I have no problem eating healthy, which is a complete surprise to me! When I first started this journey, I thought the eating right would kill me, but I actually find it quite fun. I love that I eat fresh fruits and veggies and whole grains. I love making over recipes so they're healthier, but still have lots of flavor. To bad I can't say the same for my water intake. The water is still a struggle for me. At most, I've gone a full week getting in my 8 glasses of H2O a day, but it's so boring! And 8 glasses is a lot for me to drink...of any fluid. I'm just not that kind of person. I'm trying to get back in the saddle, but it seems like all I do is drink water. Thirsty or not....must drink water. Ugh!
Right now my biggest issue is working out. I hate cleaning and I've managed to clean the whole house today in a way to avoid working out. Dishes are done, clothes are washed and put away. I've vaccumed and dusted. Fed the fishie and the crabs. I've even rearranged the bedroom. At this point I've run out of things to do. I know that once I start working out I'll be glad I did and when I finish I'll be proud that I made myself do it. I'm even dressed in workout clothes, ready to get to it and here I sit...posting a blog to buy myself some time. Many of you have told me that you have this same problem as well and that you tell yourself: "Just do 5 or 10 minutes and then you can quit!" I'm trying that, but my inner self knows that once I start, I'll do my full 30 min, so she's not buying it.
The whole thing is silly really. I have Vegas coming up in August and I'm 20 lbs away from goal. If I had kept up my momentum, I would either hit goal or be real close. Now that's just a distant dream I know I can't realistically reach. I haven't seen any weight loss in a while and it's discouraged me. But why haven't I seen weight loss? Because I haven't been doing enough cardio! I do great with the ST. That doesn't seem to give me as much trouble, probably because I tell myself: "At least it's not a cardio day!"
Joining Spark has been beneficial in so many ways. I have learned so much in my short time here and everyday I continue to learn something new. I've met so many wonderful people in different stages of their journey. Everyone has been so supportive and kind. What Spark can't help you with is how to not be lazy! This journey I'm on is mine for the taking. I can make the most of it or I can sit on the sidelines and complain. I know that I'm not going to magically lose weight without putting forth some effort, so I've been thinking that I need to asses my issues and figure out how to over come them. Which is what I'm doing here if you couldn't tell.
I'm not working this summer so I really have all day, every day to fit in 30 min of cardio. I try to stick to a schedule so I eat, take my meds, and workout at the same time. I try to split up the rest of the day with cleaning, cooking, and whatever else I want to do. And I still can't bear a 30 minute workout? It's just absurd. What is wrong with me? And this isn't one of those woe is me, pitty party blogs. This is a valid call for help! Does anyone else have this problem? I know that if I was a workout enthusiast then I probably wouldn't have a weight problem, but I'm repulsed by it LOL. I understand that we all have off days or lazy days, but I have to go through this internal struggle with myself every MWFS. I have been thinking that maybe I should start working out in the morning. That way it's done and over with and I have the rest of my day to enjoy, but I am no morning person. I like sleep and when I wake up, working out is the last thing I want to do. I did convince myself that I could do it once, but I ended up not working out at all, so I need some other ideas!
I promised myself I'd workout at 2 and now it's 2:04. So here I go... Maybe I need to trick myself into liking cardio with phrases like: It's cardio day! I get to do cardio today! I can't wait to do cardio tomorrow! I love cardio! I don't think that will work, but we'll see. Pray for me people, I need it. Or a good slap in the face might work to! I'd kick my own butt if I could...but I can't reach it!
Friday, June 10, 2011
If you're like me, you don't necessarily like working out and you get bored easily. I try to make this easier for me by changing up my workouts everytime I exercise. Sometimes that's just not enough. Sometimes I just don't want to work out. On days like this I have to be a little creative! So today, 3pm was quickly approaching and I still hadn't done anything. I decided today was going to be one of those days where I put the music on and dance around the living room, gyrating like a fool! This is a GREAT workout for me! No matter how much I don't want to move, I can't help but start shaking my boo-tay to the beat!
To really get a sweat going, I like to spice things up by doing 30-second cardio bursts in between songs. I'll do intervals of jumping jacks, running in place, high knees, and some kickboxing moves. This helps to really get my heart rate up in case the dancing isn't enough or if I start running out of steam. We have a wet bar in the living room with a wall of mirrors behind it and this is beneficial to me as well. Looking at myself in the mirror I know I look at hot mess, but it also gives me encouragment to keep going. When I want to stop, I just look at myself in the mirror and know that I can keep going and do my full 30 minutes. I want thinner arms and thighs and a smaller stomach and none of that is going to happen if I sit on my butt all day!
We often try to talk ourselves out of doing what's good for us. We're tired. We had a bad day. You ate one bad thing, might as well "start over" tomorrow, etc. These are phrases spoken by our old selves. They realize that every day we get a little stronger and a little smarter and they want us back. It's up to us to rail against those voices and SHUT THEM DOWN! Maybe you're not seeing the changes you would like. Does that mean you should give up and throw in the towel? Hell no! Any activity is better than no activity. You'd be surprised how much better you'll feel once you start moving. I'm often "tired" and once I start working out, I get a big burst of energy from those lovely workout endorphines. And the accomplishment you'll feel when you're done can't be beat! So get up and keep moving.
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