Tuesday, September 02, 2008
So, yesterday was recommitment day and I started the day feeling discouraged already. I had great ideas for planning on success, but at some level I knew that I was not really going to do it. I ate about 6 mini cupcakes and a rootbeer float. And I did it mindlessly...not even checking in with myself and my goals. I feel scared. I feel scared that I am not finding the willingness to re-commit. There is a part of me that wants to eat unconsciously and I don't really know why.
For today, I am writing about it. I am going to practice radical self-acceptance. I gently make room for these feelings and try to understand what my real needs are.
I have made a food plan for today, and since life is getting back to normal I am planning on staying with my plan.
For today, I acknowledge all of these confusing feelings, I acknowledge the part that doesn't want to let go of the enjoyment of unconscious eating. I know that part is there and that it needs to be acknowledged.
For today, writing about this is a part of my recovery from it.
For today, I turn my life and my will over to my loving God and ask God to help me get through this day of turning the energy around and getting back on track.