SWEET40SOMN   2,226
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I think

Saturday, May 12, 2012

I`ve been doing a lot of assessments lately, on my last few years. Beginning in Oct. 2010 I fulfilled one of my life long dreams of purchasing my own Harley Davidson motorcycle. One month later I broke my leg, not on my bike. In less than a month, I was staying in a hospital room 1200 miles from my home, taking care of my oldest brother, who doctors said had a 20% chance of survival. After ten months my brother had recuperated fully. My leg is good as new. I returned home, started getting settled in, started volunteering at a local charity and become nanny to a four year old little boy, for about for months everything was going great, I felt like I was living a fulfilling life. One day everything changed. I dropped the little boy off at school and went to work at the mission. That particular day everything seemed to be extra hard at work. I even started feeling a little agitated. As I was leaving out, there was a little lady begging to go to the restroom, saying it is an emergency, since the facility didn`t have a public restroom, I took it upon myself to escort the lady to the employees restroom in the back of the building. We got there safely. I looked for a chair to sit in while she took care of business, I saw one across the room and headed for it, all the sudden I stepped on a jiggered pipe sticking up out of the concrete floor. I literally flew 8 foot, I put my hands down to brace my fall. I`m not sure how much my hands actually braced my fall but I ended up breaking my left arm in two places, dislocated my elbow and damaged nerves in both hands. This was the beginning of the worse year of my life. Life is bad without the use of my hands. I couldn`t grip and forget about pouring anything. Without use of my hands, I could not do any beading, cooking was impossible I couldn`t take care of the little boy. I had surgery on one of my hands, it wasn`t sucessfull so I didn`t have surgery on the left one. I didn`t realize it but I became extremely depressed. I felt useless and stopped going and doing, this explains the 100 pound weight gain. Then one day it was like I just woke up from a bad dream, I wondered where had I been and what was that funk I had been in. Since, I am actually able to think now, I realize that I have always seen myself as being fat. I have always thought of myself as being fat. I remember as a young 12 year old girl, 90 pounds, I saw fat in the mirror. When I was a 110 pound bride I thought I was fat. Proverbs 4:23 says " Guard your heart above all else for it determines the course of your life. I`ve found where my heart and mind has been and how serious it is to be in the right mind. I praise God and give Him my attention. I have another day to change what I think.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SOHLT4ME 5/22/2012 9:52AM

    Wow, what a journey you've been on! I'm so glad your brother is doing well.
It was two broken ankles, two months in a wheelchair and two more on a walker that did me in. For depression I was taking Paxil, which I'd been on for several years. It was a long story, but that fall started me towards coming back home to NO, which I finally realized last November. New place, new doctor -- turns out Paxil is associated with weight gain. No matter I couldn't lose no matter what I did! I thought I was just middle-aged with a middle-aged metabolism and this was how it was going to be for the rest of my life. New medication, the weight started to come off, and then I started to get active. It's 30 lbs. so far, but I still have a long way to go.
Which is a long way of saying that I really identified with you, both the heart-ache and the new hope.
God bless you, sister. Every small step counts, both for your mind and your soul as well as for your body. You are beautiful, regardless of your size, and you can do amazing things!
Martha

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Two pounds

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Oh my.......... two pounds in the opposite direction of the scale. Woo whoo emoticon I am so tickled. So grateful that the scale is moving in a different direction. As of today I have lost a total of 10 lbs since I started Sparkpeople. Just knowing that I am not alone in this battle and reading all the success stories have motivate me to get out of the funk I`ve been in and LIVE. I have wasted a whole year of my life........... Time for me to start shinning again, thanks to all of you for igniting a spark in me.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SWEET40SOMN 4/29/2012 3:25PM

    Thank you Misslisa Yes ever oz counts even though I haven`t got to there yet. LOL

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MISSLISA1973 4/29/2012 11:08AM

    Ten pounds is great!! It can be easy to blow it off as "not that much" when we have a lot to lose, but it is definitely something to celebrate. What a great job!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Joining a fitness center

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Tomorrow I am joining a local fitness center. I choose a small place with 24 hour access. I then talk my mother and daughter into joining, with me. No contract is involved with the membership so if they decide they don`t want to do it, it won`t cost them anything. They have crazy amounts of cardio classes that I don`t plan on attending until I am able to move better. I am so excited and scared at the same time. There are no men, which makes me feel a little more comfortable. There is a vacustep machine I plan on using for the first month. I have to go 5 days in a row then off 2. I am guaranteed to loose inches or money back ( $250 ). I need to have a boost with the weight loss and perhaps between my workouts at home and the vacstep I`ll be strong in no time. I am looking forward to having something I am committed to doing, aka having a reason to get out of bed. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SWEET40SOMN 4/26/2012 10:51PM

    I went to join the fitness center. I was and am so disappointed. The dance ( Zumba ) class was going on during my tour, very loud and nauseating for me. This room is fairly big, full capacity about 25 with concrete floor. This room also serves as elliptical and weigh lifting area. The club has a lot of hype, very little room. It has a palates / rebounder / yoga room carpeted but not very large. Still hearing the Zumba music. There is another very small room that has one small TV and about 20 stationary bikes . The building that houses the 12 x 12 x 4 ' swimming pool is also the, nursery, one shower and one bathroom, is detached but I could still here the Zumba music. The only thing that is accessible 24 hours is the bikes, elliptical and weights. I really had a different vision of what I was getting into.
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KA_JUN 4/25/2012 5:18PM

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