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Anxiety, 15 Pounds and The Gym {{sigh}}

Saturday, June 08, 2013

Well Crap ! My depression and anxiety issues seem to have made an appearance. I had every intention of getting myself back to the gym this morning ... but I'm still at home.

I'm scared to go and workout. I'm too inside my own head. I have negative thoughts and feelings about my body and I am projecting those onto everyone else at the gm. I look at myself and see the 15 pounds I've gained. I look at myself and see the fat bulging out the side of my bra (which is too small b/c I gained 15 pounds). I look at myself and see the muffin top that spills out over the top of my shorts. I look at myself and see the loss of muscle tone and definition I used to have before the injury (and the 15 frigging pounds).

Intellectually I know people at the gym are not seeing or thinking those negative things about me, but that doesn't seem to matter.

OK - here's the plan. I have an appointment with a new trainer on Monday in the very small private PT gym where I have been doing my M.A.T. therapy. I will hang tight until Monday. Working with a trainer will get me to the gym and help me feel comfortable there. Then, once I have my feet wet I will try again to go solo. My confidence will return - it's just on a little hiatus right now.

OK - Vent over. I feel better, less neurotic, if still too anxious to go to the gym. At least I'm not crying anymore. Hey - one step at a time - Right ?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TUFFYBIRD 6/19/2013 6:40PM

    I know I'm very late in commenting on this - but C you are/were not being neurotic. What you are feeling is real and those of us who know, recognize those feelings well.

I hope your PT appointment went well and that you're settling into the new gym.

Hang in there kid, you can do this!

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LILYPAD12311 6/16/2013 3:04PM

    Hang in there sweetie,,,, I have moments where I feel that way,,,, and I am a much larger woman than you,,,, imagine if you were my size! Nevertheless,,, I am proud of you that you took the bull by the horns and make a decision to have a trainer ease you back into an area where you were a bit reluctant to go....... emoticon

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CELLO23 6/9/2013 5:18PM

    Oh, Surly - didn't realise you were having such a hard time with your feelings after the injury. Good to do something really fun with friends who don't judge you! You'll get back to where you want to be, but the main thing is to love yourself while you're doing it! Not conditional on weight or abs! You rock just as you are! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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    Don't beat yourself up over the weight gain...You can, and you will get back to where you were. Things feel hard right now, and I get it, I'm giving advice not worry about it and I'd probably be in my head too. But you know, at the end of the day we've got to somehow listen to the voice of reason and take action.

I suffer with depression and anxiety occasionally myself, and I for me exercising really does help alleviate some of the symptoms. I think once you get out Monday and work with the trainer that's really going to help.

You have a plan! You're not crying! You're going to do AWESOME!

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    Hang in there! You've got a plan in place for Monday and you're not crying - that sounds like good progress to me!!! emoticon

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FLASUN 6/8/2013 6:14PM

    emoticon Carolanne!!!! I read your post on "What Motivated You today".........
YOUR desire to NOT allow your Anxiety Issues take over you was emoticon !!!!!!!
So Happy you made it to the gym & wishing you the emoticon on your Monday training with your PT coach!!!! emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/8/2013 6:15:12 PM

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CYCLINGSANDY 6/8/2013 2:39PM

    It 's not about others, but it is about you. You are important! I cannot imagine the anxiety you are having right now, but I am hopeful you'll work through it soon. One day at a time! emoticon

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NEW-CAZ 6/8/2013 10:44AM

    emoticon emoticon

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ROOTIHAUSMAN 6/8/2013 10:35AM

    You have a plan and that is a step in the right direction! Take a walk or hang out with some friends to help with the anxiety. You can do it! emoticon

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SHERIO5 6/8/2013 10:32AM

    Good for you making a plan, I agree with the last poster, you are doing something now, which is awesome! emoticon

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LOLOMIZZEL 6/8/2013 9:57AM

  I think you're choosing to deal w/ the 15# before it's 20, 30 or more! Today, Sat. and tomorrow, warm up stretch, work on some of those "work out fears" at home. It will set your head in motion and you won't be surprised on Monday. Stop beating up on yourself, you made an appointment! Next step... Keep it :) You will not see results if you do nothing, I'm saying that to the 3 fingers pointing at myself, identifying the downward spiral. I can't wait to hear the "I did it from you." emoticon

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50 Ways to Stay Motivated

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEW-CAZ 5/30/2013 3:49AM

    emoticon emoticon

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PMFISH 5/29/2013 11:15PM

    Thanks for sharing.

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WATERDIAMONDS 5/29/2013 4:23PM

    Thanks! Great little link. I especially was interested to read the one about how wearing red helps. Weird!!!

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Big Progress on my Back Injury !

Tuesday, May 07, 2013

I am so excited about something that happened in Pilates class tonight.

8 weeks ago I injured my back and that compromised my entire skeletomuscular system. I was unable to walk, sit, stand lay down without pain. My chiropractor helped somewhat in the first 2 weeks and I resorted to Vicodin and ice packs and a back brace.

3 weeks ago a trainer I know suggested a new form of therapy called Muscle Activation Technique or M.A.T.

This revolutionary way of looking at and dealing with the skeletomuscular system is completely mind blowing. The concept is so simple yet no one has ever come up with it before. Instead of treating the muscle that is tight - for instance a hamstring - they treat the muscle that pulls you into leg raise which would be the hip flexor. The tight muscles are not the problem. The tight muscles are the body's natural defense against injury caused by muscles that are not performing or firing properly.

After an 2 part evaluation and 5 (so far) therapy sessions my pain levels are down to a 2-3 on a scale of 1-10. Before starting MAT I was at 6-8 on various parts of my body.

OK - and back to tonight and the Pilates class. I take the class with the specific understanding that I do NOT stretch. I only go as far as my muscles allow with absolutely no stretching and no discomfort. Tonight, for the first time in over 2 months I did a Pilates Roll Up. It's a very slow and methodical sit up from a prone position using your core to pull your vertebrae one at a time up off the floor into a full sit up. Tonight I did a Roll Up !

I did a Roll Up ! I was actually surprised that I was able to do the move. My thought was to give it a try and abandon the move at the first hint of discomfort of any kind. Discomfort never reared it's ugly head. I did 3 consecutive Roll Ups (and Roll Downs) without any problems.

If you or anyone you know suffers from chronic or acute pain you should look into finding a MAT Specialist in your area. It's expensive and not covered by insurance, but it's worth every penny.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TUFFYBIRD 5/20/2013 2:41PM

    Good for you, C. Back injuries can be SO debilitating. It's good to hear that you found something that worked. I'm glad you're feeling better.

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LILYPAD12311 5/8/2013 7:34PM

    Hooray for you Surlygirl!!!! YOU had an issue,,, you found a solution and now you are reaping the benefits,,,, A Pilate Roll Up,,,,, I am proud of you! emoticon The best part is that you are helping others out there who are facing the same challenge. You Rock Surlygirl! emoticon

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4EVER21B 5/8/2013 4:28PM


I am so glad you are doing better!

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DRKEYEZ820 5/8/2013 12:07PM

    Yay awesome for being in no pain and being able to do that move! That's FABULOUS! Im so excited for u girly!

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VIXSTERLU 5/8/2013 11:39AM

    So awesome!!! Glad you found something that is working for you :) Thanks for sharing.

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HAPPYSOUL91 5/8/2013 10:56AM

    This is fantastic, so glad it worked for you. Also, thx for the information, going to their site

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BOBINVA 5/8/2013 10:11AM

    That is great!!!! So happy for you.

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CAALAN23 5/8/2013 9:50AM

    Glad you found a way to be free from pain! Back injuries are so frightening because you realize how vulnerable you can become. Thanks for the link, I'm going to check it out.


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KBRADFORD88 5/8/2013 9:37AM

    awesome girl...I know that modern medicine is doing its best...but it is missing the mark on so many levels. glad you got some relief

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STARLIGHT615 5/8/2013 8:13AM


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FLASUN 5/8/2013 8:09AM

    emoticon Carolanne!!! Wonderful and so happy for you!!!! emoticon emoticon Hugs, Janice

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LOVESLIFE48 5/8/2013 8:05AM

    That is so awsome!!! Congrats on your progress!! Please be careful!!! emoticon

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NEW-CAZ 5/8/2013 2:41AM

    emoticon I am so glad you're making good progress and getting moving again. It's scary when you injure yourself so severely.

Have a good day hun emoticon

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RIDMYCOCOON 5/8/2013 12:54AM

    emoticon emoticon

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JIACOLO 5/7/2013 11:15PM

    I have looked into this, but didn't know anyone who had done it. Thanks for the info!

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The Incredible Human Body

Sunday, May 05, 2013

The Human Body is a treasure trove of mysteries, one that still confounds doctors and scientists about the details of its working. Itís not an overstatement to say that every part of your body is a miracle. Here are fifty facts about your body, some of which will leave you stunned.

1. Itís possible for your body to survive without a surprisingly large fraction of its internal organs. Even if you lose your stomach, your spleen, 75% of your liver, 80% of your intestines, one kidney, one lung, and virtually every organ from your pelvic and groin area, you wouldnít be very healthy, but you would live.

2. During your lifetime, you will produce enough saliva to fill two swimming pools. Actually, Saliva is more important than you realize. If your saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.

3. The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm. The egg is actually the only cell in the body that is visible by the naked eye.

4. The strongest muscle in the human body is the tongue and the hardest bone is the jawbone.

5. Human feet have 52 bones, accounting for one quarter of all the human bodyís bones.

6. Feet have 500,000 sweat glands and can produce more than a pint of sweat a day.

7. The acid in your stomach is strong enough to dissolve razor blades. The reason it doesnít eat away at your stomach is that the cells of your stomach wall renew themselves so frequently that you get a new stomach lining every three to four days.

8. The human lungs contain approximately 2,400 kilometres (1,500 mi) of airways and 300 to 500 million hollow cavities, having a total surface area of about 70 square metres, roughly the same area as one side of a tennis court. Furthermore, if all of the capillaries that surround the lung cavities were unwound and laid end to end, they would extend for about 992 kilometres. Also, your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.

9. Sneezes regularly exceed 100 mph, while coughs clock in at about 60 mph.

10. Your body gives off enough heat in 30 minutes to bring half a gallon of water to a boil.

11. Your body has enough iron in it to make a nail 3 inches long.

12. Earwax production is necessary for good ear health. It protects the delicate inner ear from bacteria, fungus, dirt and even insects. It also cleans and lubricates the ear canal.

13. Everyone has a unique smell, except for identical twins, who smell the same.

14. Your teeth start growing 6 months before you are born. This is why one out of every 2,000 newborn infants has a tooth when they are born

15. A babyís head is one-quarter of itís total length, but by the age of 25 will only be one-eighth of its total length. This is because peopleís heads grow at a much slower rate than the rest of their bodies.

16. Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood the number is reduced to 206. Some of the bones, like skull bones, get fused into each other, bringing down the total number.

17. It is not possible to tickle yourself. This is because when you attempt to tickle yourself you are totally aware of the exact time and manner in which the tickling will occur, unlike when someone else tickles you.

18. Less than one third of the human race has 20-20 vision. This means that two out of three people cannot see perfectly.

19. Your nose can remember 50,000 different scents. But if you are a woman, you are a better smeller than men, and will remain a better smeller throughout your life.

20. The human body is estimated to have 60,000 miles of blood vessels.

21. The three things pregnant women dream most of during their first trimester are frogs, worms and potted plants. Scientists have no idea why this is so, but attribute it to the growing imbalance of hormones in the body during pregnancy.

22. The life span of a human hair is 3 to 7 years on average. Every day the average person loses 60-100 strands of hair. But donít worry, you must lose over 50% of your scalp hairs before it is apparent to anyone.

23. The human brain cell can hold 5 times as much information as an encyclopedia.Your brain uses 20% of the oxygen that enters your bloodstream, and is itself made up of 80% water. Though it interprets pain signals from the rest of the body, the brain itself cannot feel pain.

24. The tooth is the only part of the human body that canít repair itself.

25. Your eyes are always the same size from birth but your nose and ears never stop growing.

26. By 60 years of age, 60% of men and 40% of women will snore.

27. We are about 1 cm taller in the morning than in the evening, because during normal activities during the day, the cartilage in our knees and other areas slowly compress.

28. The brain operates on the same amount of power as 10-watt light bulb, even while you are sleeping. In fact, the brain is much more active at night than during the day.

29. Nerve impulses to and from the brain travel as fast as 170 miles per hour. Neurons continue to grow throughout human life. Information travels at different speeds within different types of neurons.

30. It is a fact that people who dream more often and more vividly, on an average have a higher Intelligence Quotient.

31. The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger.

32. Facial hair grows faster than any other hair on the body. This is true for men as well as women.

33. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

34. A human fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months.

35. By the age of 60, most people will have lost about half their taste buds.

36. About 32 million bacteria call every inch of your skin home. But donít worry, a majority of these are harmless or even helpful bacteria.

37. The colder the room you sleep in, the higher the chances are that youíll have a bad dream.

38. Human lips have a reddish color because of the great concentration of tiny capillaries just below the skin.

39. Three hundred million cells die in the human body every minute.

40. Like fingerprints, every individual has an unique tongue print that can be used for identification.

41. A human head remains conscious for about 15 to 20 seconds after it has been decapitated.

42. It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown.

43. Humans can make do longer without food than sleep. Provided there is water, the average human could survive a month to two months without food depending on their body fat and other factors. Sleep deprived people, however, start experiencing radical personality and psychological changes after only a few sleepless days. The longest recorded time anyone has ever gone without sleep is 11 days, at the end of which the experimenter was awake, but stumbled over words, hallucinated and frequently forgot what he was doing.

44. The most common blood type in the world is Type O.The rarest blood type, A-H or Bombay blood, due to the location of its discovery, has been found in less than hundred people since it was discovered

45. Every human spent about half an hour after being conceived, as a single cell. Shortly afterward, the cells begin rapidly dividing and begin forming the components of a tiny embryo.

46. Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do. This is largely due to the fact that a majority of the machines and tools we use on a daily basis are designed for those who are right handed, making them somewhat dangerous for lefties to use and resulting in thousands of accidents and deaths each year.

47. Your ears secrete more earwax when you are afraid than when you arenít.

48. Koalas and primates are the only animals with unique fingerprints.

49. Humans are the only animals to produce emotional tears.

50. The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 feet in the air.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CELLO23 6/2/2013 3:08AM

    Interesting stuff! Strange about the pregnant woman dreams :) Shows how much our minds are affected by physical states!

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VIXSTERLU 5/7/2013 1:00AM

    I disagree with number 13, my husbands identical brother smells nasty, lol. Great stuff here :) Thanks for sharing.

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LILYPAD12311 5/6/2013 10:39PM

    Very interesting! Thanks for posting Surlygirl!

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STRONG_SARAH 5/6/2013 2:50PM

    Very cool, our bodies are amazing!

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NUTRON3 5/6/2013 9:53AM

    Wow, amazing

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NANNABLACK 5/6/2013 7:21AM


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NEW-CAZ 5/6/2013 2:53AM

    Amazing information emoticon
Have a great week emoticon

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STITCHINGNAN 5/6/2013 1:23AM

    Amazing facts

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JODROX 5/5/2013 11:11PM

    Very interesting!!

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BOBINVA 5/5/2013 10:35PM

    That is very cool

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Picture Blog - NYC Trip

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Me a few blocks from the Empire State Bldg. It's the bldg behind me that's so tall you can't see the top of it ;) It was emoticon snowing that day !

Me at Battery Park with The Statue of Liberty behind me on the left and Ellis Island on the right. It was freezing that day and snowing so the background is nearly lost in the overcast sky.

Valerie and I at Battery Park

Myself and Valerie on the NYC subway

Rockefeller Plaza - The Today Show

Myself and Valerie in Rockefeller Plaza at the Today Show

Blake Shelton (2 feet away from me) The Today Show

View of Central Park East from the Museum of Natural History (Central Park West & 79th)

There are lots more pictures that I wanted to post but SP says they're too large.

My BFF Valerie and I were in NY for less than 4 days and here's what we did. Times Square - a Broadway Show - Rockefeller Center - The Today Show - Madison Ave - 5th Avenue - The NY Public Library - Macy's - Grand Central Station - Battery Park - Wall Street - The 9/11 Memorial - Madison Square Garden - Penn Station - The Empire State Bldg. - The Flatiron Bldg.
The Museum of Natural History - Central Park.

We ate a local Irish Pub - a local Brick Oven Pizza Italian Restaurant - a coffee cart - a hot dog cart - a real NY Deli - a real NY Diner.

The weather held us back from doing a few things. We wanted to walk across the Brooklyn Bridge and see the Historical Seaport. We also wanted to take a river tour to see the Manhattan skyline.

We walked anywhere from 4 - 8 miles every day we were there. It was such a great trip and Valerie and I were such wonderful travel mates. It's such a blessing to have a friend like her in my life. The next trip is with the hubbys- the 4 of us are thinking Vegas!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOOKUMS19 4/7/2013 7:30PM

    Wow! You did soooo much!!!! Good for you! Looking good! We just love the city!

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NEW-CAZ 4/6/2013 8:27AM

    emoticon looks like a lot of fun!
Have a great weekend my friend emoticon

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CELLO23 4/5/2013 10:25AM

    Hey Surlygirl - it looks great fun and you packed an amazing amount in! Would love to get there sometime - have enjoyed your trip vicariously! emoticon

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XXMILAXX 4/5/2013 8:56AM


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DRKEYEZ820 4/3/2013 12:50PM

    Looks like a lot of fun! :) Glad u got to go!

I went to Ellis Island, when I was in 8th grade. Was beautiful, even got to go up in the Statue of Liberty!

What the heck, so Jealous u so Blake at the set of the Today show!!! Im not huge into country, but Im starting to like it, and he seems so down to earth. Like him as a person.

4-8 miles! Geez woman u killed it! All while enjoying yourself!

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LILYPAD12311 4/3/2013 11:44AM

    Surlygirl!!! I loved seeing your pictures from NY!!! What a great time and you seem to hit all the hot spots,,,,,,,,,, including seeing Blake Shelton up close!!! Talk about HOT!!!! emoticon That trip is on my bucket list,,,,, one day,,, I will get there,,, really looks like you and your bff had a great time ,,,, you inspired me to post some of my pics..... hey,,, if Sparks says that your pic are too big,,,,, make your pics smaller by making a copy and altering them into document size or web size,,,, not that hard,,,, but you have to play with the picture program that you have.

Thanks for sharing!!!

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KITKAT717 4/3/2013 8:26AM

    Looks like a fun trip!!!

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BOBINVA 4/2/2013 4:45PM

    Thanks for posting those. I miss NYC. Always lots to do there.

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GLUECIPHER 4/2/2013 3:20PM

looks like you had fun

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TUFFYBIRD 4/2/2013 3:17PM

    It looks like a great trip ... and you sure packed a lot into 4 days!

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CATLADY52 4/2/2013 2:57PM

    That sounds good. Although you probably won't be able to do as much walking. At least not at one time. emoticon

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