SUNSHINE65   64,875
SparkPoints
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
 
 
SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Form Feed

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Insurance form question and answer about a recent accident:

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? A: I could have traveled by bus.

A man collided with a cow and completed the requested form as follows:

Q: What warning did you give the other party before the collision? A: Horn

Q: What warning was given by the other party? A: Moo

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALICERIEGER 7/1/2012 2:29PM

    Fun

Report Inappropriate Comment
ATLTRAINR 6/30/2012 6:27AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


St. Peter's Book

Saturday, June 30, 2012

A man arrives at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted. St. Peter is reading through the Big Book to see if the guy's name is written in it. After several minutes, St. Peter closes the book, furrows his brow, and says, "I'm sorry, I don't see your name written in the Book."

"How current is your copy?" he asks.

"I get a download every ten minutes," St. Peter replies, "Why do you ask?"

"I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I was always the stubborn type. It was not until my death was imminent that I cried out to God, so my name probably hasn't arrived to your copy yet."

"I'm glad to hear that," Pete says, "but while we're waiting for the update to come through, can tell me about a really good deed that you did in your life."

The guys thinks for a moment and says, "Hmm, well there was this one time when I was driving down a road and I saw a giant group of biker gang members harassing this poor girl. I slowed down, and sure enough, there they were, about 20 of 'em torturing this poor woman. Infuriated, I got out of my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and walked up to the leader of the gang.

"He was a huge guy; 6-foot-4, 260 pounds, with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ears. As I walked up to the leader, the bikers formed a circle around me and told me to get lost or I'd be next. So I ripped the leader's chain out of his face and smashed him over the head with the tire iron.

"Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, 'Leave this poor innocent girl alone! You're all a bunch of SICK, deranged animals! Go home before I really teach you a lesson in PAIN!'"

St. Peter, duly impressed, says "Wow! When did this happen?"

"About three minutes ago."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NAYPOOIE 6/30/2012 3:29PM

    must be a slow connection.

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALICERIEGER 6/30/2012 2:51PM

    At least he tried!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ATLTRAINR 6/30/2012 6:29AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FITANDFIFTY2 6/30/2012 2:47AM

    Lol.. that is a very good one!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LATTELEE 6/30/2012 1:20AM

  Good one!

Report Inappropriate Comment


Leave your shoes at the door

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

While carpenters were working outside the old house I had just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workmen asked to use the bathroom.

With dismay I looked from his muddy boots to my newly scrubbed floors. "Just a minute," I said, thinking of a quick solution. "I'll put down newspapers."

"It's all right, lady," he responded. "I'm already trained."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KNITTINGNAN 6/30/2012 1:25AM

  Being married to a carpenter, I found this to be really funny. Thanks for the laugh!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NAYPOOIE 6/28/2012 1:03PM

    LOL

Report Inappropriate Comment
BARCLE 6/28/2012 5:08AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALICERIEGER 6/28/2012 4:42AM

    That was a unexpected response.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SASIKHASI1 6/28/2012 1:04AM

    That gave me a much needed laugh.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KNEWMETODAY 6/27/2012 11:51PM

    That's hilarious! It kind of makes you wonder sometimes, huh?

Report Inappropriate Comment
DRAGONCHILDE 6/27/2012 11:45PM

    LOL!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BEARGODDESS 6/27/2012 11:26PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


DMV hi lites

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

It was just another day at the DMV. I had taken a woman out on her driving test when a police cruiser came up behind us--sirens wailing, lights flashing.

"Was I speeding?" she asked the officer, after both cars pulled over.

"No," said the officer. "But you are driving a stolen vehicle."

Smiling awkwardly, the woman turned to me. "Does this mean I failed my test?"

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

13610511 6/28/2012 11:44AM

    crazy!

Report Inappropriate Comment
RANDOM00B 6/28/2012 9:43AM

    Hey, it's a legitimate question! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALICERIEGER 6/28/2012 4:41AM

    Wow! Great one.

Report Inappropriate Comment
2ABBYNORMAL 6/28/2012 12:12AM

    This is hilarious!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SFREY217 6/27/2012 11:37PM

    Wow, what a crazy day at work !

Report Inappropriate Comment
SPIRIT42013 6/27/2012 11:19PM

    HaHA! How many calories can you burn by laughing??! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Jets Fan

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Jets jersey helmet and is holding Jets pom poms.

The bartender says,"Hey! No pets allowed in here! You'll have to leave!"

The man begs, "Look I'm desperate. We're both big fans, my TV is broken, and this is the only place we can see the game!"

After securing a promise that the dog will behave and warning him that if there is any trouble they will be thrown out, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.

The game begins with the Jets receiving a kickoff. They march down field stop at the 30,and kick a field goal. With that the dog jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down the bar giving everyone a high-five.

The bartender says,"Wow that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?"

"I don't know," replies the owner, "I've only had him for four years."

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RANDOM00B 6/27/2012 9:43PM

    emoticon Awesome joke!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALICERIEGER 6/27/2012 10:23AM

   

oh=oh

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 Last Page