SUNSHINE65   58,654
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Famous Movie Quotes (The First Drafts)

Sunday, May 06, 2012

The Godfather: "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse. Well, he can refuse it, of course. I just know that if someone were to make me an offer like this, I'd jump all over it. But who am I to impose my feelings on someone else?"

The Terminator: "I'll be back. Do you need anything while I'm out?"

Dirty Harry: "You've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? I ask myself that every day, and you know what? I feel so very lucky. Loving family, steady work..."

Taxi Driver: "You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Sorry, it looked like you were talkin' to me. My mistake."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALICERIEGER 5/7/2012 10:46AM

    Thanks!

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BAYBERRYBEAR 5/6/2012 11:53PM

    emoticon

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Free Drinks

Sunday, May 06, 2012

The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, "What'll you have?" The guy answers, "A scotch, please." The bartender hands him the drink, and says "That'll be five dollars," to which the guy replies, "What are you talking about? I don't owe you anything for this."

A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then says to the bartender, "You know, he's got you there. In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration."

The bartender was not impressed, but says to the guy, "Okay, you beat me for a drink. But don't ever let me catch you in here again."

The next day, same guy walks into the bar. Bartender says, "What the heck are you doing in here? I can't believe you've got the audacity to come back!"

The guy says, "What are you talking about? I've never been in this place in my life!" The bartender replies, "I'm very sorry, but this is uncanny. You must have a double."

To which the guy replies, "Thank you. Make it a scotch."

  
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BAYBERRYBEAR 5/6/2012 11:56PM

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Speeding Up

Sunday, May 06, 2012

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.

Also: Birds take off at sunrise. On the opposite side of the world, they are landing at sunset. This causes the earth to spin on its axis.

  


WWJD

Thursday, May 03, 2012

Most people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?" But the initials really have been changed to stand for "What would Jesus drive?"

One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because the Bible says, "God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury."

But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Jesus to "pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm."

Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast."

Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John's gospel where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own Accord..."

Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that "the roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the hills."

Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: "Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land." And, following Jesus' lead, the Apostles car pooled in a Honda... "The Apostles were in one Accord."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NAYPOOIE 5/4/2012 10:56AM

    LOL. Who knew?

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ALICERIEGER 5/4/2012 10:25AM

    All in the interpretation

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GRANDMA624 5/4/2012 5:43AM

  Cute emoticon

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GRAMMAP1 5/3/2012 11:09PM

    I had no idea the Bible referred to so many vehicles. Some one worked a while on that one! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BAYBERRYBEAR 5/3/2012 9:45PM

    Too funny!

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A Lesson in English

Thursday, May 03, 2012

Harry is getting along in years and finds that he is unable to perform in bed. He finally goes to his doctor who tries a few things, but nothing seems to work. So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man.

The medicine man says, "I can cure this." That said, he throws a white powder in a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke.

Then he says, "This is powerful medicine. You can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say '123'"

The guy then asks, "What happens when I want the effect to go away."

The medicine man replies: "All you or your partner has to say is 1234. But be warned - it will not work again for another year."

Harry rushes home, eager to try out his new powers.

That night he is ready to surprise Joyce. He showers, shaves, and puts on his best shaving lotion. He gets into bed, and lying next to her says, "123." It works better than he thought.

Joyce, who had been facing away, turns over and asks, "What did you say 123 for?"

And now you know why you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRANDMA624 5/4/2012 5:45AM

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BUDDYSMYFRIEND 5/3/2012 2:18PM

    emoticon

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WILSON425 5/3/2012 1:07PM

    emoticonThere's always next year. Oh wait, how old did you say he was? emoticon

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NAYPOOIE 5/3/2012 12:29PM

    he he he

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HELEN_BRU 5/3/2012 10:55AM

    I love it!

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